The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Giving Up Booze For Lent.

[Mouseface]

Hello.

I'm Mouse.

We are a Bus load of posters with various relationships with the demon booze. Some are sober, some are not and some are inbetween.

So come say hi and meet the rest of The Babes, there's always plenty of room on the Bus, the doors are ALWAYS open.

No judgy pants are worn on this journey, pants yes and even the odd Tena Lady but always of the non judging variety.

Previous Threads

Morning all

B*gger of a day here already, and am woefully sleep deprived, but day 7! and taking a perverse pleasure in the fact that even if I do look and feel like death warmed up, it's not self-inflicted (well, other than the decision to have children in the first place lol!)

MissP well done on the milestone!

Thurso - hope it goes well today.

Nicky - well done on coming out of Tesco empty handed

Bafana - I don't have anything to say, but didn't want to ignore. I think maybe the clue is in your own post - there isn't anything more you can do, it has to come from him, although I know it's much easier for me to type that than for you and the DCs to watch. Don't let it push you into feeling hopeless though, you're not failing here.

Good luck in the presentation Thurso sorry to ask how you were and then log off yesterday, didn't realise the time and was busy from work time till bed.

ONly had a glass last night and 2 the night before so hopefully cutting down again. It's my big birthday surprise today (birthday not till Tuesday before you all start singing) and really excited although trying to work out what to wear and how to take everying thing I probably won't use need as hand luggage only!

Go, MissP!

Hello

Is it safe to post again yet?

What the Jeff was all that about last night

Seriously Babes. I felt furious reading some of the posts on here. This is a SUPPORT THREAD, not a slanging match thread.

I have to say that purple - you remind me of a poster that used to appear here a while ago, are you a name change?

JWN - how are you sweetheart? Calmer now. Totally got where you were coming from with your anger last night. How is DD? And DH?

Ma - brilliant to see you back on the Bus again, how are things with your DH? And how's the drinking?

Zany - have a wonderful weekend. Enjoy every last moment and let DP spoil you rotten. Huge hugs lady xxxx

MissP - fab to see you and WELL DONE on reaching your 9 month milestone.

wheresmum - stick around, you'll get used to each poster's individual style and IME, that is what makes this Bus such an intresting place to be.

Trist Wheresmum TWDA - just jump right in! We were ALL new posters at one point. It's fab to have new passengers on the Bus, really it is. It really helps all of us everytime one of the us posts, drinking or not. Sharing your life and stories makes us all that little bit more mortal.

MILFAW - I'm sorry to see that you got a bashing yet again last night. I might start putting a disclaimer in the new thread welcome notes from here on in.

I understand and love your posting style (and you know you scared the shit out of me on my first few posts ). Now I know that you are only ever trying to help by sharing your experiences.

Nicky - well done on not buying that bottle or two last night! That was so hard for me to do in the early days.

Bafana - sweets, you are being pulled in so many directions at the moment, both emotionally and physically.

Be careful with yourself. Be kind to yourself and try to keep a strong hold of the control you have at the moment. I'm so sorry that you FIL is doing this, it must be heartbreaking for you to watch. HUGE hugs to you lady xxxx

thurso - the very best of luck today lovely. xxxx

Silver - are you okay? I found your posts a bit ahem, 'angry' last night. Is something going on in RL?

I was on Nemo watch again last night. He's struggling to breathe with this cold so I have to stay with him and make sure he is lying in the best position to have an open airway.

Mucho coffee here today. DH is off to an overnight 'do' so DD and I are having a girl's night in. Can't wait

Hello everyone! I am also deliberately ignoring the kicking-off last night except to say that MIFLAW has helped me lots with his posts and I heart him :)

MissPerrier 9 months is amazing and inspiring! Well done!

Nicky Well done to you too for resisting last night, you have taken the first step.

I am still cross with myself for my lapse on Wednesday night. And I am cross with myself for letting my fears about returning to work impinge on the time I DO have.

Uh oh, DS has just woken up!

Hope everyone has a lovely Friday :)

Hey maddogs - learn from it is what I'd say. Use the anger to create a positive attitude and say 'fuck the fuck off' to the booze! You are still doing really well, and it can't be easy with a little one to look after either!

Lack of sleep is hellish and one thing that used to have me reaching for the vodka in days gone by. How is DS? Growing fast I should imagine.

Hi everyone. Congratulations MissP - that must feel wonderful!

I am pleased too though it is not such a big one (!). At the moment I'm at a sort of half-way stage, only drinking de-alcoholized wine which gives me summat to do with my hands but doesn't get me drunk. I've been ticking off every day I don't drink on the calendar the morning after.

I saw we've got some newbies and I just wondered if this was worth me posting about. I don't post often, mostly lurk, but I think I'm right saying virtually everyone on here had/has some false starts when trying to stop. This might not work for everyone, but for me ticking off 'no drink' days was a really big motivator because I could look at the calendar and see that, even when I was falling off the wagon, I was still stopping more than I was drinking. First there are calendar pages with a few ticks, then more, and now I've not had a drink since February 9th. So today I got to look at my calendar for March full of days ticked off.

I don't know if that sounds daft to others but to me it is very satisfying and really helps. I feel really happy and hope I will be able to carry on and on.

See you around the bus everyone ...

LRD

I think counting your days is really good advice - every day without drink is an achievement and we ought to give ourselves credit for it.

That sounds like a really good idea LRD as you can look back and see how you are doing and so hopefully won't feel so despondent if you fall off the bus.

Counting down the time now before I leave work and go pack for my surprise

Oh Zany - I bet you are uber bouncy today!

LRD - well done. You sound so much more positive than when you first started to post. fab to see you xx

Zany - glad I haven't missed you, have a fab time!

LRD - well done on a whole "clear" month! I think the marking off days is a really good idea as it lets you see the bigger picture and the progress made rather than just a day-to-day thing

Yes feeling very bouncy, especially as it's April Fools Day. Tried to play tricks about 8 times so far but only 2 people fell for them - think I am losing my touch!

I saw one - ''For Sale - 1 litre tin of red and white striped emulsion, covers with first coat, ideal for circus themed children's bedrooms''

Nice one

I told the DC's that school was cancelled this morning (DD wouldn't talk to me for half an hour after that one)
Told DP I had lost my passport
Told a few people I am off to New York
Hidden a fake fly in DS's lunch box
Told friend Dp has proposed
Told parents that he dog is limping and can't put her foot down (My Dad accidently trod on her foot last night

mouse I love that ... I'd fall for that one!

Hi all
Can I hop on the bus with you?? I know there's not much of Lent left but have cut down wine to weekends only from most nights and it's easier some days than others!! It's my reward for getting thru the day, doing everything I have to do with the kids, house, work, etc - and what can I replace it with?? Any ideas?

Zany - your poor dad! Made me though.....

Welcome Cocktail how about juice and tonic/soda water, non alcoholic beer

The DC's got off lightly - I was scouring the shops yesterday looking for green hair spray as I was going to spray them in their sleep so they woke up with green hair.

you are wicked!

Yep, that sounds nice, but it's a mocktail when it's booze free.

I quite like a non-alcoholic beer with a dash of lemonade and slice of lime. Feels like a treat

Hello EVERYONE

Not sure whether I told you that dp has stopped drinking too for a while (an experiment for him, not a drinking problem) - it's been interesting. It has made some things easier - no booze being purchased, easier for me to be open with him about how I am feeling about not having a drink; and it has made some things oddly more difficult - not offering a drink to friend who was visiting, him drinking MY elderflower , both of us fighting to be the designated driver... We were out last night for dinner and had a really nice evening, lots f laughs accompanied by a glass of lime and soda and 2 bottle of water .

Cocktail you asked about non-alcoholic drinks... I like a glass of tonic, but it must be served properly - cold fizzy tonic, ice, slice of lemon or lime. I reaaly don't mind that there is no gin in it (this is often referred to on here as a N&T (nothing & tonic)). I also like lime and soda, grapefruit and soda, cranberry and soda, purdy's tonic drink - basically anything that isn't too sweet. I often just like water with a meal, and I drink loads of herbal tea. I think one of the important things is to make whatever you ARE drinking feel like a proper treat. Stock your fridge with nice juices, make sure you have ice cubes in your freezer, invest in some really luxurious hot chocolate... I'm not much into de-acloholised wine (I worry that I would just sit there wishing it had alcohol in it). I do have to say in all honesty, that despite all the lovely options above (and I do enjoy them), I haven't yet found anything quite like a crisp cold sancerre with some fish, or a big glass of rich ruby red with a steak .

However and this feels important, I now know that I can survive without wine, and more importantly that I am choosing to do so yesterday, today, and probably tomorrow. However tempting the glass of a favourite wine might seem, it is continuing to weigh unfavourably when compared against the consequences. I have been in this game for long enough to know that for me, having one glass, or even two, is not a long-term option - in the past I have always wanted more (and more, and more). In a career of stop/start drinking I have not shown myself any evidence that I can drink in moderation on a consitent basis. So for me, at the moment, I'll deal with missing wine, and I'll focus on the enjoyment I do get from alternatives, keep on experimenting to find others, and most of all enjoy being sober.

Cocktail

Just to add something to what Venusandmars says - if you are looking for a drink to replace your beer/wine etc, her ideas are excellent.

If you find yourself with a sudden urge to drink then, in those circumstances, something sweet is EXACTLY what you need, the sweeter the better, as it will make the thought of a drink unpleasant - imagine having a glass of red after a can of Coke and a Creme Egg! Mint-based food and drinks are very good for this too.

I missed cocktail's post and thought Zany was asking about mocktails ...................

Sorry.

Hey venus and MILFAW

Cocktail - I'd say something sweet too due to the amount of sugar wine has in it. I craved sweet things all of the time, not just at night to replace my wine when I first stopped pickling my organs.

So my tipple of choice is pomegranate, apple and raspberry cordial, made up with diet lemonade or tonic water, in a tall glass, choc full of ice, and a straw!

For summer last year, I made up a faux Pimms too - juge full of apple juice, with slices of apple, grapes, strawberries and orange in it. Loads of ice, and a bit of sunshine, plus a quiet garden to sit in.

With some Minstrels to follow, they are always good because I let them melt in my mouth.

And hello BTW, sorry I missed you earlier.

Hello all. In need of kick up arse. Spent the day today pretending I had some dire lurgy, which has been, in fact a whiskey hangover. Still new round these parts, and have been pretty well off the plonk since I arrived last september, so no pattern of behaviour to 'alert' people, but i'm so sick, asahmed, ill(!!) cross sad flat ...whaever. I'm so cross with myself. Really worried this is it. One spectacular binge and I'm back on it. I know i know, just need a bit of tough talking. Please.
Hubby has no idea...straight back into old habits, evidence hidden.
Feel like none of it ever really went away, I was kidding myself.
Atended a few meetings, but nearest ove 15 miles away, and am working pretty well full time now... excuse sounding really, but...
I apologise a million times fro crashing in, I just can't keep up, but you were all my lifeline last summer, and I wonder if anyone might be about to talk some sense.
PS hiding my computer history too, I'm a bit thrown by this..will check in when I can.
pps I know there's a bit of a spat rumbling just now, soryabout that, i really am.

Hi algee, tis me, your friendly venus to kick you for your stupidity... Now before you get all cross with me, I am not calling you stupid for having a drink, and I'm not calling you stupid for feeling sick, ashamed, low etc. But please, please, do not get into the foolish trap of thinking that just because you had one day of drinking (or 10 days consecutive drinking) that you have no choice.

You do have a choice. Exactly the same choice as you have had every minute of every day when you have not had a drink. Having had one binge has not taken that choice away from you. The trickery that is your alcoholic mind might want you to believe that (oh wouldn't that be a convenient excuse ), but it is NOT true.

After stopping for months, I had a drink in the days after Christmas. I felt stupid, I was deceitful about it, and a part of me wanted to just give up all this sober lark and gpo back to getting pissed. But I didn't. And it wasn't any more difficult this time (in fact for me it was a damn sight easier than it was last summer). Remind yourself of what works for you - is it having your fridge stocked with non-alcoholic drinks? is it writing out just exactly how crap and sorry for yourself you feel at this moment? is it reminding yourself of all the money you save, the good things worth being sober for? is it imagining the looks on your dh's face and the consequences in your life if you return to drinking? is it making the effort to go to AA (I know that I'd have driven 50 miles out of my way or spent £20 on a taxi to GET a drink, so why wouldn't I put the same effort in to avoid having a drink?).

You know you have a choice algee. You've already chosen to come and post on here - well done.