The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Carry On Into Spring - BOING!!

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So, this is The Brave Babes Battle Bus.

All are welcome, regardless of your background, stage of sobriety, or anything else.

I'm Mouse and have been here since June 2010, and in control of my drinking since August 2nd 2010.

You will find unconditional support here. Always.

Whatever you feel about drinking (or not), we've been in your shoes. Some more than once.

So, come say hi, come grab a seat. There is always an open door and a warm welcome on this Bus.

Hi everyone,
I can't really go into specifics of why Social Services made the decisions they did or why I do feel AA is the right and only place that helps me get well.
For the sake of my sobriety I need to bow out for a while because there is a very real risk I am going to pick up not just defensiveness but resentments, and they would be death to me. If you encounter other posters who are beyond what you see as this thread, or AA (I'm not going to read back to quote exactly what has been said but basically those you can't understand why they are so far down the slope) feel free to suggest they PM me.
Fortunately AA thinks I am in the right place. I do actually have a lot of "yets" left, whether you think so or not.
Indie I hope it's ok if I text you about that coffee and maybe a meeting this week?
I hope I'll be back when my sobriety is a bit stronger. Will be thinking of many of you.

Good luck.

well noteven, obviously you have to do what you think is right for you - i do hope i havent upset you with any of the questions i asked yesterday? - it simply worries me that ss can be so blase with a childs safety, after all, a lot of your drinking stemmed from the fact that your ex had allowed his dd to be exposed to abuse - i know that we have many younger babes with small dcs who will be horrifed and terrifed that ss, who actually can be a huge to help to families in crisis, could behave in such a cavalier manner.

i wish you all the luck in the world and hope you get your dd back soon!

Noteven

Sorry you feel that way. I hope I had no part in your decision to disappear.

Even if you never come back here, please do keep going to AA - as, by the sounds of it, you will - at least until you have a better idea (I am still waiting for my better idea ...)

Feel free to PM me if you think that it would help.

morning mif!, i have made the time to fit in at least 3 meetings this week, i feel better already! - what do you do when life gets in the way?, i know it shouldnt, and that it is important i go, trouble is, its also important that i try and maintain the jobs of the people that work for us, believe me, thats more than a full time job at the moment.

Hello noteven, hope things look up for you. Remember taking the moral highground on a forum is so easy, people don't know whole stories. And drink fits into one's individual situation, not one size fits all. some people seem to forget that.
I'm managing well and enjoying not drinking but life is calm which makes it sooo much easier

I make sure I get to a minimum of one meeting a week, even on holiday abroad, and stick to the real basics - brief prayer every morning (even though I am an agnostic atheist) of which the first line is always, "God, just for today, please keep me away from an alcoholic drink - if I don't take a drink, I can't get drunk" and which always ends with the serenity prayer; as a result, I put everything into not having a drink; use this thread; get 100% involved at the meeting(s) I do go to (always share, always sit near the front, stick around to help newcomers if I can); try to stay grateful (often, seeing a tramp in the street will trigger this); and try to stay honest.

There is other stuff I would probably do if I was sensible enough to have a sponsor ...

I think the key is to "keep it green" - remember who and what you are and act accordingly. And, every time you miss a meeting, just have a last-minute check that the reason for not going still holds. It's really easy for Corrie to become a reason not to attend!

Noteven, I am also an alcoholic. It is so easy for people to say "think of your child" or "just stop bloody drinking". If only it were that simple.

I understand why you feel as you do about posting here. Thinking of you and wishing you all the best.

Luci X

thanks mif!, good advice as always! fwiw, i can find any number of reasons not to watch corrie!, its about northerners isnt it?

rumred - im glad you are doing well, i have to take issue with you though - i have never seen anyone on here take the 'moral highground', none of have a right too, we all have a problem with alcohol, thats the bottom line - sometimes i do find it hard to understand why a person will carry on drinking after a period of sobriety, when they have felt the benifits and enjoyed being sober and KNOW full well the consiquences of their actions, and i will ask them why they did it, as miflaw would say, being kind can kill, sometimes we need to hear it like it really is. i also think that one alkie asking another searching questions is fine, if i wanted to i could find any excuse in the world to pick up, if i did, i would hope to god someone on here would remind that the only excuse i really had is because i wanted to!

Yes, I believe it's set in one of those villages near Scotland - York or some such.

you're right, i think its about people who wear clogs or something and eat fish and chips every night!

am off to meeting now, you'll be pleased to know, see you later!

I hope you have finally accepted that when you drink, you are letting your daughter down. Massively.

You are risking losing her for good which is something that I really struggle to comprehend. I would give my last breath to my children so I don't understand why you keep fucking up, knowing all too well what the outcome will be.

This is what Mouse wrote to Noteven. I am now attending AA and have spoken to my doctor about my dependence on alcohol.
I still lasped at the weekend.
I love my children very much but the pull of my addiction is so strong. I know Mouse had the best of intentions but with due respect, she is capable of having a couple of drinks and leaving it at that.

I suspect Noteven cannnot. I certainly can't.

I don't feel Noteven needs to be beaten when she's already so down.
She's lost her daughter. How much shitter does she need to be made to feel?
Sorry...
Am leaving it there.

Just want to say that I am in total agreement with Luci and Rumred

I know its not popular to say but some on here do take the moral highground, I can do at times too. My point is that this is a forum and I don't know the ins and outs of other peoples lives, nor do any of us. Kindness generally gets the best results in my experience.

It strikes me that this is a forum on a very touchy subject for people who have a strong track record of being touchy about that touchy subject, but who also care deeply about others in the same shit as them.

It would be amazing if no one upset anyone else ever.

I hope we can all move on from this debacle - this thread does far more good than it does harm, which is why I stay, and even the most unwelcome advice is useful to someone, even if not the person it was intended for.

One day we'll look back and laugh at this, etc.

Well said, that man.

I think we all care about each other very much, and value what others say, otherwise we wouldn't bother to post. I know that's true for me anyway.
xx

Hi everyone, sorry not posted for a while, been really busy so just been lurking.

How are you now Noteven are you home? Am really hoping that you have the support you need now with going into Rehab. Am sure they can see that you have been repeatdly trying to get help with your addiction from your GP in the past and AA. I think maybe you took on too much too soon in working so many hours. You have been dealing with an addition, poorly Mum, repucusions from happened to your DD, splitting up with XP and working very long hours. You have had alot on your plate. Am hoping and optomistic that you will be with your DD soon.

Well I have had a suprise in that DP (still gulping at the words) has booked a suprise trip away next week for my birthday. Have been told to bring my passport!

What Miflaw said!

I care about you all a very great deal, I post because it helps me, and I have "met" some wonderful people whilst doing so.
I do not believe that anyone posts from a position of "superiority" - look at what we are all posting becuase of!?!

I, however, am an alcoholic who chooses not to drink, on a daily basis. It's not easy, it's harder (on some days) harder than anything I have ever done, but the thought of living with alcohol terrifies me enough to keep me sober today, and tomorrow, I will make that decision again.

I don't not drink for anyone other than me!! I only do it for me, and all the other people that benefit from that decision is a very happy consequence.
I know that I cannot be the person I want to be when I drink, I cannot be safe, I cannot be the mother I want to be, I cannot be the daughter/friend I want to be, I HATE the person that I am when I drink, I cannot control me or my behaviour.

Right, rambling now.
noteven I hope you find peace and courage.

Love to all

Isindie you have a great way with words, you said exactly what I wanted to say but couldn't find the words.

Evening all, once again it's very quiet in here! Where is everyone?

Hi Bafana just back from work and catching up again. Have you had a good day? it is lovely to glimpse a bit of daylight at last although the spring weather has started off my hay fever aready!

Noteven if I upset you I am deeply sorry

Isinde good luck with the new routine - it sounds like a good start. It takes me back to my baby days, although unfortunately we never cracked the sleep thing with DD. She is a full grown insomniac woman now. The other one can sleep for Britain, I think it is just the luck of the draw.