Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Would this be acceptable to you ?

165 replies

joanne34 · 19/02/2011 10:03

Would it be okay for your DP to escort a woman home in a cab because she was so drunk she couldnt walk and all her friends had buggered off ???

OP posts:
Theyremybiscuits · 19/02/2011 10:04

Don't like the sound of that at all, no.

Theyremybiscuits · 19/02/2011 10:05

Is that what he told you?

portaloo · 19/02/2011 10:06

For me, I wouldn't mind. Does he know this woman or was she just a random stranger?

Or is there more to this than your DP just helping someone get home safely?

LisaD1 · 19/02/2011 10:06

Depends, if it was as you have written then I would be fine with that and think he had done the right thing by the woman. If I had suspicions that something else had happened then that of course would not be ok.

The way you have written it sounds liek he was being a good samaritan.

Is there more to this story though?

ENormaSnob · 19/02/2011 10:07

A random woman? If so I find that really odd tbh.

Original poster
joanne34 · 19/02/2011 10:11

It was a birthday party after work and this friend of a work colleague, was heading the same way as dp, and apparently she was cained so they got a black cab to place, then he made his way back home. I dont know her.

Dp took the money out of our account ! He said she is going to pay him back.

Yes he was probably being the good samaratian, but i would have just put her in the cab, he said the driver wouldnt take her alone.....

OP posts:
textualhealing · 19/02/2011 10:12

My instinct is to say that I would have a problem with it but at the firm's Christmas party, one of my male team members got so drunk, he could get up off the floor and one of my female staff, took him back to his hotel, in her taxi - they were not staying at the same hotel. Everyone saw it as an act of kindness and selflessness!

ENormaSnob · 19/02/2011 10:14

Why didn't he just drop her home from the cab then continue his journey?

LynetteScavo · 19/02/2011 10:14

Yes, I would find it totally acceptable, and I wouldn't expect the woman to pay DH back....she probably won't even remember she owes him money.

upahill · 19/02/2011 10:15

It would depend on his track record and how he normally is whether I thought this was reasonable or no.

Without knowing your fella I can't make a judgement.

Only you know what he is like round women.

LisaD1 · 19/02/2011 10:16

I think your DP was just being kind. Put yourself in the woman's shoes, would you not be grateful that a decent guy got you home (and very embarrassed!) but at least she got home safely. She must have been totally wasted for the taxi driver not to want to take her alone!

FromGirders · 19/02/2011 10:16

If it was someone that dh knew well enough to know her home address (ie not a complete random stranger) then I would expect him to see her home safely.

portaloo · 19/02/2011 10:18

Sounds like your DP did a good turn here imo. Are you upset about it OP?

AstronomyDomine · 19/02/2011 10:22

It absolutely wouldn't be a problem for me but then I trust my husband ... do you trust yours?

CameronCook · 19/02/2011 10:23

I would expect DH as a father to a daughter and a decent human being to make sure that a pissed vulnerable woman made it safely home.

ENormaSnob · 19/02/2011 10:23

Did he get out of the cab at hers then another taxi home?

CameronCook · 19/02/2011 10:23

The taxi driver may not have wanted to put himself in a position of being open to accusations / having to clear up sick etc etc which is why they may feasibly have refused to take the woman.

Niceguy2 · 19/02/2011 10:24

I agree with upahill. It depends on his track record. If he can be a bit of a jack-the-lad then you have reasonable grounds for suspicion.

But sometimes men can be chivalrous and do kind things too.

More importantly, why did her friends just pissoff?

LynetteScavo · 19/02/2011 10:24

Understandably the cab driver wouldn't take her alone...should your DH have just abandoned her? And after shoving her though her front door he walked home (either no cab was passing, or he felt he'd spent enough already).

CameronCook · 19/02/2011 10:24

Oh and he should be having stern words with her so called friends.

IsinDeBetterPlace · 19/02/2011 10:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

whatacharmer · 19/02/2011 10:25

If my DH left a drunk and incapable friend alone then I would think he was an absolute shit.

boohoohoo · 19/02/2011 10:26

Really does sound like he was just being responsible and kind, after all he was just seeing her home safely. My DH would probably have done the same, I would just feel proud of him for not leaving someone.

COCKadoodledooo · 19/02/2011 10:27

Was just about to type what whatacharmer did. Almost exactly. So, 'what whatacharmer said'!

notyummy · 19/02/2011 10:27

Sounds fine to me. TBH I have had the same done to me by male friends Blush in the past and DH (DP at the time) didn't bat an eyelid. It really wouldn't bother me....but then we have a couple of single female friends who live near where DH has been working and he has been round to their house for dinner a couple of times (dinner party with others there) and then stayed the night in the spare room to avoid driving back to where he lives in the week. We both spend (and have always done so) a lot of time apart in our relationship and have to be able to trust each other.

Surely your DH must have some previous 'form' if you don't even trust him to walk/escort someone home?!

Swipe left for the next trending thread