Dumpling no more - only the strong survive and we did No.1

[Teaandcakeplease]

At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinkin' I could never live without him by my side;
But then I spent so many nights
Thinkin' how you did me wrong
And I grew strong

This thread is for ex dumplings Any dumpling that feels like she has "mostly" moved past crisis into an "almost" sorted state can post and chat here as we continue our quest for serenity with a lot of laughs along the way and support.

Norm playing hard to get,do u think he has read self help books ,maybe he just has a big ironing to do....

Lol Patience

Patience I watched Silent Witness and can't believe what happened, kept thinking no it can't have been him! Just saw your post, oh bugger really liked him won't be the same without Harry, although I do like Leo.

When I said won't be the same without Harry made me think about my Terrier who I have got to have put to sleep today. No it won't be the same without my little Harry.

Starting - norm is playing hard to get! Just go over to his and ravage him!

Oh my God Romney........that's awful. Are you ok ? Feel so sad for you.

There are so many dogs in this world that never know love and a good home ,Rom.ur little guy is much loved ,u have given him a wonderful life ,he just got sick,big hugs for u today,my thoughts are with you Rom x

Romney sorry about your dog

Pink thanks for film tip and I agree the thread is like diary , I might try and dig out the one from June last year when I began on here

Mumfun glad you are busy it isnt me texting you

Starting well done brainbox and agree lets see each other in the next fortnight is a bit odd !

Patience dont watch Silent Witness so cant feel your pain

Googoo dont over analyze about CD man just live in the moment and see where it all leads. I think he sounds nice but not geeky isnt that a good combo , just need to check his shoe size and then you'll be away

Elsie Pete Burns ? Bloody hell thats grim ! I agree with others that a gradual return to work will be good so make the most of chilling and healing now

Well the difference in dd last night was amazing and I have had a realisation that I havent been focused enough on them which I am not beating myself up about but need to deal with now.

Read a random chunk of the Lundy Bancroft book while ds was training last night , havent paid the book much attention tbh but the bit I read was perfect timing. In order to leave our home etc serenely I need to know xh being gone is the best thing for me and now I do. Will post a bit more later in case it applies to any other dumplings luking or otherwise !

Oh Tea why worry if you havent posted /read everything just jump on when you get a chance you need to apologise. Hows nursery going for dd ?

Have a good day

dont need to apologise Tea !

Seriously need some sympathy this morning

Grr, Tea, what a silly lady! I had a similar thing happen to once when DS was a toddler and it's really horrible. Some people are so silly.

I need sympathy also (sorry, needy post). Difficult call from BE on Saturday re: DS who is clearly not ok. Just had another one and DS not ok. Stomach has gone urghh. Feel helpless as DS is so far away and also frightened that he is not ok, frightened at prospect that he could end up coming back. Know I wouldn't be able to deal with it all again. Strange to live in one world where all now seems normal but one call and back in the mire.

Rom, sorry about dog

Getting, good that all is better with DD

Starting, I'm with Rom, I would ravage him.

Hugs happy x

Happy, so sorry you've this to deal with again. I know only too well that feeling in your stomach when you get a call like that . No advice but I'm thinking of you ((Hugs))

Tea, that woman is completely out of touch with reality. As someone else said I wouldn't care to have her as a mother or g'mother . Rise above it all me thinks & be grateful you're not her, imagine living your life that judgemental, critical & devoid of understanding or empathy . You have my sympathy though as I regularly find the supermarket a nightmare. Tbh I give mine breadrolls in supermarket to keep them occupied but latest prob is that they've started to chase each other around aisles . Oh the joys of parenting!

Rom, sorry to hear about your little dog . Sending you virtual ((Hugs))

Getting, so glad to hear you are back on track again with dd. Glad also you got something positive fronm the book, I've found then to be a life saviour at times.

Well have decided that I have a busy life, 3 dc's to focus on & I can't be arsed dealing with this crap with Norm. I've sent a polite email asking could he explain his thoughts as I was unsure what benefit waiting a further two wks before meeting up would be. Ball firmly in his court & Norm you'd better be stepping up to the plate pretty swiftly or I'm a movin on . I'm a dumpling ffs, no wishy washy crap acceptable!

Rom, thinking of you and your dog. Sad day but you know you have no choice and you've done your best and given him a happy life.

Happy, thinking of you. Such a difficult situation. I hope BE is able to be more understanding and supportive now that he has seen th reality of the situation.

Getting, I've been trying to focus more on ds this last week and it's amazing how just a bit of extra attention makes a huge difference. We're a solid little team now.

Starting, I think I'd be playing it cool with Norm too. He needs to lay his cards on the table. In fact that, scrap that. Too many game related metaphors. He just need to say it how it is.

Tea, what a silly, silly woman. Her not you, obviously.

Must go. Dog has shocking wind. The park beckons.

Yep act disinterested now but these independent relationships are tough eh...........co dependency and general dysfunction come naturally to me ,LOL.
Ok but I'm working on it. Started reading women that love to much.

Tea dont take any notice some people are just like that unfortunately

Happy so sorry to hear that and yes let BE take some of the strain now, not suggesting you want to wash your hands of ds at all but surely its down to BE to have a sustained period of dealing with this rather than shipping him back to you ?

Starting hope Norm gets the message and you can get things how you would like them with him

Patience I dont like the title of that book much but I have heard its quite good, await your critque !

Well just fixed a shopping trip with bf to take our dds to Bluewater in feb, not really my thing but she will love it.

Romney we haven't met properly (!) so you prob don't know H took our dog with him to OW (the other ladies have sympathised suitably) so just wanted to say sorry your dog has died, very sad. Patience, dd1 and I were stunned at Silent Witness! How could they kill off Harry? In and out here in an hour so back later .

Thanks for your support ladies.

I haven't read things properely today but I will once the kids are in bed.

Am rushing back out with dc's but just to report was blown out by Norm . He is sticking to his two wks, think he's trying to punish me for pointing out something that he'd have preferred to stay in denial about!!

His loss starting he obviously cant cope with a strong woman x

Just found out X is still in touch with the 21yo but he is still denying it .I have told him I just want peace now and closure so I can move on.Just wish he could be honest with me cos I'm not sad /angry anymore just need some brutal honesty to stop any hope left in my heart x

Aw, sorry Starting. Maybe you have to write it off as one of those transitional relationships.

Patience, the very least you deserve is honesty. We all deserve it. Unfortunately most of the men that got us here on this thread have a default position of lying. Even to themselves.

Romney........hope you're ok. My friend had to do the same thing last week. Her dog was 17.

one day I'll have to do it too. That will truly be the worst day of my life, I well up just thinking about it, she is the sunshine of my life, and of the DC too, so I'm really thinking about you.

Offschool........I didn't know he'd taken the dog, I can't believe it, do you ever see it ? How coldhearted the ow must be to not say to your H......'FFS, you can't take the dog, it would be too cruel to your wife'.

Happy, so sorry about the long distance worrying you're having to do. I hope BE is trying his very best to deal with DS1 and doesn't just give up and send him back to you.

Rom - so sorry to hear about your dog, it is heart wrenching because dogs just love you so unconditionally don't they? Just look back at all the good times...but you're bound to feel really sad.

Tea - the woman sounds a sad bitter woman. Not worth a minute of your emotions on her. God, imagine living her life and being such a vile individual. Things like really do hurt -you can't control what horrible people do - but you can control your reaction to them. Pity her. I do.

Starting - stay strong. You may be feeling awful but you've been through so much...that you have to hold you head up and get through this too.

Patience -It was only when I got the whole truth that I started to recover and move on. I know where you're coming from.

Me? Got a date tomorrow...he is a bit of a smitten kitten at the moment, but he sounds nice so I'm looking forward to it. We had our wobble on the phone today...I have massive issues about a huge scar I have, and he's feeling that I will be be disapointed when I see him. But I feel better now we've 'fessed up and hope it will be nice.

Stay strong ladies

Hi everyone. Well, had the bishop in officially opening our new school building, so wore my best dress :) Then had to rush home, make tea, take oldest son to footie - now I'm knackered.
Romney - so sorry about your dog. Patience is right - you gave him a life full of love but I know that won't stop you being sad today - lots of love x
Starting - well done on exam! Sorry about Norm. Bit of game playing? I'm not into that really. Don't think you should give up yet though - at least see him again and find out what he has to say for himself.
Getting - good thinking on house and ex and your feelings. And you're right - not going to over analyse CDman. Just haven't quite got over exbf and don't want to lead him on but I really like him and so just going to take it slowly.
Patience - feel for you about ex. Know what it's like to still have feelings even when you know you shouldn't. Found out exbf is playing a gig in week's time. So angry knowing that he's going to be playing his new songs about me, singing "You're sweet enough you know you are but sometimes I need more" to all our mutual friends, who will know it's about me. How dare he? Fucking drug dealing loser - I'm not bloody good enough for him? WHAT an ego.
Kate - good luck tomorrow - need immediate updates mind! :)
Happy - sorry about DS. Horrible worrying long distance. Hope it works out. Hugs.
Patience and Maybee - still got to look into train times but I'm coming on 5th Feb!
Offschool - I rmember your exh taking dog. Bastard.
The bishop gave a lovely sermon to the kids at Mass today. I'm not religious but it really struck home. He reminded them of what the Pope said on his recent visit to a group of young people. He said "Keep your heart open to love. Remember that lots of people love you and that you are worthy of this love because you are precious. And remember to also give love back. Even when your heart is hardened because of grief, diappointment, anger or jealousy. Always give and receive love."

And Tea - a bitch and a snob eh? What a winning combination.
A while ago, my 4 year old got some sweets in the supermarket, opened them at the checkout, ate one ad realised he didn't like them. Huge screaming ensued (and he's not even a toddler) when I refused to go back and buy some other ones. So he left the supermarket saying "Shit, shit shit" very loudly in front of all the people in there (most of whom know me as their kids' teacher). It was great. But you see, I was in Morrisons. So I'm allowed to be scum :)

Harry Cunningham is not dead!!!!

My poor little Harry is tho I took him this afternoon, it was such a hard decision to make, kept trying to put it off but he had only eaten when I feed him cheese and only drank if I took him water to his bed, so I know it my heart it was the right time for him. I have very sore eyes at the moment. Harry was the last link with my Mum who died 6 years ago, as she bought him for me when my
exH left me.

Pink, I am in a way lucky as I have two other dogs I cant imagine coming home to no dog.

Kate have a great date.

Starting sorry about Norm, play it by ear and see what happens over the next two weeks.

Blimey ET I have a dog with a very bad gurgling tummy!