Chin Up and Tits Out for the Recently Ditched No. 11

[Teaandchristmascakeplease]

Dearly Be-Chucked, we are gathered here today because, for whatever reason, our man has dumped us!

Whether you are a new dumpling or a vet, feel free to join us in our quest for serenity

[shocked]

Massive cross post there.
LDT - I have lost count of the number of times I have said to XP, I hope she was/is worth it.
Will catch up on your story Coffee. Hi.

LC I like your positive spirit keep flowing! Yes I'll let the dust settle again and look into ways of keeping the house. I'm a bit miffed as well as I phoned a school in Ireland about supply teaching and although they were interested in me and said to send a cv, she did say teaching jobs are v scant there so my bubble deflated a bit.
Anyway tomorrow will be a brighter day I hope.

Mortgage brokers make their money on commission from the product they sell you, not from you so they're free

Look up IFA's in your area and see if they specialise in mortgages and then call them to book an apt or ask a friend who they used for recommendations.

Will you be safe Coffee?

Hi everyone. Things at work very busy and in dispute (yet again) with my horrible bully of a boss. She gives women a bad name. Just trying to pluck up the courage to write her a letter...gulp!
Welcome Coffee. So sorry you haven't had much luck on your thread. I will read it and go on it.
Here is another big hug for you. I was also married to an emotional and verbal bully, who used to break things round the house, called me a c* every day for about three years, also told me to eff off every day. He had me on my knees with his criticisms of everything I did, what I did for a living (teacher), what I cooked, how I breathed, you name it. By the time he left I was quite literally broken. I was scared of him, I felt completely worthless. Him leaving me was the best thing that ever happened to me. I begged him to stay but thank god he left. Three years on and I'm a different person. And I'm not scared of him at all. He lost his power when he went. It was such a relief to be free of the abuse and I've gradually rebuilt my self worth. You are doing the right thing. Stay strong and keep posting. Lots of love to you. Keep on here - as Kate says, it's such a good place and it's helped so many of us :)

Hello Goog Happy New Year. Poor you with your boss. I don't know what it is in schools but there do seem to be a lot of female bosses throwing their weight around. Write a really brutally honest letter and then bin it. Just be careful how you word the one you intend to send her. I'm v wary of putting things in writing especially to unreasonable people.
Would you still like to hook up?
I'm away to bed now, am drained by my life.

Googoo - I was getting worried as you havent been around much recently I miss you cheerfulness.

LC - Long may your strength and positivity rein. You are too good a lady to be treated so badly, in fact we all are none of us deserve this shit.

Good night all, lets hope for positivity tomorrow.

I must be a bad person because I really hope and pray that their relationship doesnt work and I would like him to feel even a small amount of the pain he has caused me!!!

No, that's not bad Romney. It's called karma.

To be honest Romney that is what kept me going in the early days knowing their relationship would never last.

Hello - started

Chin Up and Tits Out for the Recently Ditched No. 12

here

when everyone is ready to move - getting full on here again :)

Tea - must admit it is actually what is keeping me going at the moment, I know that's wrong and I know (I hope) in time that will probably lessen as I move on. I felt the same with my exH, his relationship lasted 18months but I knew the OW as she was a friend so knew she was a bit of a nutter, but I don't know this 27 year old apart from what I'm told and I can't believe everyone is wrong about her being not a nice person but maybe I am grasping at straws. Maybe they will last forever but find that had to figure as when she is my age at 45 he would be 73 and I can't see myself wanting to go to bed with someone that age!

Tea I really want to turn this all around and not live for his failure.

Tea - can't remember didn't you say they are still together although rocky?

Hi Romney. How are you feeling today? I find the mornings difficult. I've accepted it's happened but still not feeling happy about it. Looking forward to the day when I say, that was the best thing that ever happened to me. I know in my heart that day will come. I've even been imagining what it would be like to be in love with someone else...

Fairy, how are you this morning? Have you managed to see the GP yet?

GGM, you really must be relieved to be rid of your xh. Hope things at work settle down soon.

Maybee, feel your pain re house. XP and I are trying to negotiate a settlement. I'm tempted to say let's just leave it until ds is 18. We've both promised him that we'll do whatever possible to ensure he stays in his home. I don't think he'll forgive xp if we have to move.

Hope everyone cool today , got both kids off sick but taking them to doc later ,waves to coffee ,sending u strength.put urself first now ,his warped version of events is his problem now.u know the truth and IME the biggest gift I can give my kids is a peaceful happy home ,that wouldn't have been the case if I was still living with their father. Keep safe contact sol and WA re advice.remember the transition between being a couple to being single isn't UR new normal,that will take a few months to develop so if u lose somethings in the break up remember there is a good chance u will sort something out along the way.remember there is nothing to fear but fear itself.UR a strong lady and a great mum .keep posting for support .

Hello all - god a week in politics is a long time but it's got nothing on this board! Have had a mixture of broadband problems and illness (now In eighth week of cough) have kept me away.
Thank-you so much for all the kind words re my slip up last week - it did remind me of something - what a shite, selfish shag my x is!

Also thanks to those who asked where I was - it means so much it really does
Will catch up on thread in a bit but I need a friendly shake from someone please - xh asked me for a temp loan this morning and I said no. his mum also said no and seems to tthink it's between me and him (she can't cope with it apparently ) but then she has an odd idea of parenting walking out on her kids at 11. I've said to him he can have food from the a cupboard and I'll put petrol in the car for house trips. THat's being fair isn't it? He's being grovellingly nice.

Anyway will catch up later - hello to all especially those having a hard time and who are new x

Great to hear from u make do .
I'm zero tolerance in this dept. Only way to train them imo ,he should be paying u etc etc.def no cash changing hands.
It's not UR problem imo.

Empathise re broadband.
Sorry u have been sick x

Makedo - my Mum used to swear by Buttercup cough syrup for coughs (you can get it over the counter)but it could be the alcohol in it!

Hope you feel better soon.

Thanks patience he has agreed to pay a huge amount of his say towards house -basically two thirds of mortgage etc and I take over the bills so he's trying to be fair. But if does need to learn as he's useless about money which doesn't bode well - so yes I agree no cash. Typical of his mum though - I wrote about her quite a bit on my original thread - she's incredible in her selfishness - her first reaction to me when I told her about James leaving was 'oh this sort of thing always happens to us at Christmas

city thank you - I was once told by a doc to never suppress a cough as they were there for a reason but I've had enough!

Sorry forgot to say patience - hope your dcs feel better soon

Hope trip to docs with dc goes OK patience and they start to fel better soon.

No worries ,mine didn't pay me Dec at all. I know he would have been out celebrating Xmas and new year with our maintenance .just thought he would have paid me something towards Santa ,but u live and learn.good urs is paying his way but I agree he has to learn to budget.

re dcs
I think they will be on antibiotics ,so the whole taking stinky medicine thang 2 nite.

boiler has officially thrown in the towel no amount of coaxing will get it working ,so away to.gps after doc x

sorry to hear about the medicine and the boiler patience

The builders (plasterers actually) were very nice - and when I mentioned the boiler, they showed my how to reduce the pressure...gave me some advice and were all very concerned about it...so nice to write about men being nice and helpful for a change! :)

Had my interview this afternoon. I'm pretty sure I won't get it, I've never been so useless in an interview. usually I do really well.

It's hard to come across as confident when you've not had a decent night's sleep without nightmares for ages. I was literally shaking. Pathetic :(

Thank s Kate .
Ps I remember ur mil make do ,did u Google drama triangles ?

Yeah I've been doing the pressure thing since I moved in Kate,now red like comes on ,have coaxed it for a week and heating was on 2hrs then switches itself off .won't come on at all today x

fingers crossed for ya sj x