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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

HUSBAND LEFT AFTER AN AFFAIR II - AM MOVING ON WITHOUT HIM

930 replies

solost · 19/12/2010 19:11

My husband left me in mid-August when I found out he was having an affair. My original thread (husband had an affair and I want him back) detailed the fact that I felt he had made a mistake and asked for advice on how to get him to see sense and come back to me and our 3 DCs. Four months on, he still hasn't returned and I am re-buildling my life without him. That thread is now full. This is the continuation. Thanks to all of you for your support.

OP posts:
ScaredOfCows · 22/12/2010 10:26

Good luck, I hope it goes as well as it possibly can do.

Xales · 22/12/2010 10:28

I too am sorry for this touching a sore point for you H&C. Congratulations on getting your shit together and moving on and making a success of your life.

Solo has to protect her children whether he is actually ill or not.

None of us on here can answer that only trained professionals. Passing him onto her PIL is the best thing that she can do. Solo has enough on her plate with her children and herself.

fantus · 22/12/2010 10:29

Morning solost - here to hold your hand as promised Smile.

I think he is really showing his true colours now isn't he. So he can't stand you taking some control so tries to turn it round so it is all your fault. So after all the SHIT he has put you through so far he is now adding emotional blackmail to the list. If only you would stay meek and mild he wouldn't have to avoid the DC's. And how convenient, because of you he is now free to spend all of Christmas with BB and her family!!

Screw him, tell your DC's with as much compassion as possible and then make your own arrangements for Christmas.

I agree you should be denying him access to YOUR home unless already arranged. Change the locks if possible.

Stop the late night texts. Yes he says it is to see how the DC's are but it is also an easy way to keep tabs on you too and keep you engaged.

Inform him from now on all contact must be pre arranged and only via e-mail. Block his number.

You can do this - I know this wasn't how you saw your life turning out but this is the reality HE has created. And in case it isn't obvious, I hate him too Angry

H&C, also sorry for your experiences, I think everyone is just trying to focus their support on solost at the minute and her DC's

perfectstorm · 22/12/2010 10:30

I'm so sorry. I'm afraid to an extent this was predictable. He doesn't want to tell them - he wants you to do it. He wants to then be able to blame you for their reaction as well as to avoid it himself.

I'm also so sorry, but he is now deciding to believe the script he's been feeding BB all this time, instead of the one he was feeding you.

I'm going to say something people here may not like. You don't know what he has been saying to her, all along. You don't know whether he told her your marriage had been in name only for 2 years as she told people, you don't know if she has been told a version that is so very different to that he told you. I'm not excusing an affair, not at all, but she may have been fed lies that make it feel a great deal less awful than the truth. After all, given all the lies he has told you, why would he have any more respect for her?

Can I also suggest that when you tell them, you ask your PIL to be present. This is for three reasons. One, the kids will know it's the truth but that his parents are still loving them and still involved. They won't lose all that side of the family. Two, you will get support yourself and he can't twist it later and pretend you told them a worse version than the reality. And three, there will be a lot of support for them afterwards, when they will need it. You can't split yourself in three and all three will need love and support. Three adults means each get an ear and a hug when they need it most. Finally I also think involving your PIL so closely is the best way to try to keep your ex involved in the children's lives, because they can speak to him and be heard in a way his ex-wife just can't. If you tell your PIL about the panic attacks and anxiety and that the children know something is terribly wrong and must now be told the truth, I suspect they would want to help. This is how they can. Obviously that may be a bad suggestion on my part - only you know your family and your children - but if he is too much of a coward to be there then his parents may be able to reassure them of his continued love and involvement in a way that they can trust - and the older two, certainly, will worry that a mum of split parents can't offer that reassurance when their father isn't even seeing them for Christmas. (They can also apply pressure so that he does see them.)

I am so desperately sorry.

perfectstorm · 22/12/2010 10:33

"I agree you should be denying him access to YOUR home unless already arranged. Change the locks if possible."

Legally you can't change the locks but people do it all the time. I think it's now imperative that you are one of them. You need to assert a physical boundary. He's left and can't just waltz in and out of your life and home as he has been doing.

emmyloulou · 22/12/2010 10:40

Good luck solo x

What a shit of the highest order. So this was all a load of crap. He just can't stand you being in control. He now gets Christmas with bb. What he wanted all along but now he has a crap excuse to blame you.

This man is not mentally ill, he is an utter shit. So sorry for you all. But yes knows the time , you don't know what he is going to come out with.

I also agree with changing the locks, say its for safety if it's brought up later.

fantus · 22/12/2010 10:41

sorry - just wanted to add. I don't think anyone is suggesting that if your H is having MH problems he deserves it or should be left to suffer. But I don't think it should be your responsibility to support him through this.

He has his "soul mate" Hmm and his very supportive parents and he can seek help through professional channels and his GP.

You have enough to deal with and I still think your priorities should be your DC's and yourself

fantus · 22/12/2010 10:45

Thanks perfectstorm, I did wonder about the legality of changing the locks, just forgot to add it!

gettingeasier · 22/12/2010 10:48

God Solost what a towering bastard ..[anger]

I hope you and your dc are ok x

kettlecrisps · 22/12/2010 10:56

I really feel for you solo. What a rough old time you're having. Just when you think it can't get any worse - it does - again.

Sending you lots of good wishes today.

I know you are seeing a lot clearer now what everyone has been saying about his behaviour over the last few months being consistently cruel. You haven't seen this as you needed as much info on BB to "try to make sense" of your life being spun round every which way. We all understand that, however, we also know that no-one needs to be as cruel with the drip, drip information which kept you like a rabbit in the headlights for so long.

We could all see it being mind control - you were unable to move on and think straight were you? Look how he now reacts when you have unspun your head from his games.

His choice of word today is particularly interesting in the light of what I said to you yesterday regarding control. He has now articulated to you that he doesn't like it at all when YOU are in control of your own life/brain/emotions/thoughts etc. It's not something he's used to is it?

I've said this before once you have truly detached he will look so "empty" to you. He will be like a shell in front of you and you'll literally wonder what you saw him. I know it seems difficult to grasp that still. Your love/devotion/life revolving around him is actually a battery for him. As his battery starts to run dry watch as yours soars!

He takes from you and doesn't give back. You will see his empty shell for what it is. All your respect for him will be ground down by seeing him so clearly without him controlling your mind.

He has literally been a vampire on you. All the love that used to be sucked out of you and fill this man you will now feel in your own veins and YOU will get the benefit and literally expand,expand as you grow in confidence in your decisions of what is right and wrong.

Don't doubt yourself Solo. You are right. You have been treated abysmally and maybe for for a lot longer than you realise. You are right to let the children know the situation whatever his silly threats are. Make your plans for Christmas without him now.

What a long, long way he'd have to come back now to deserve your love. Chin up is really the only thing you can do. Chin up because you know you are better than him and would never play with your children's emotions. You will learn to start to trust your instincts. x

dontdisstheteens · 22/12/2010 11:07

He is not just silly but pathetic in every sense of the word. Make Christmas as different as you can for the children. I prescribe junk food, all in your bed and loads of funny films and hugs! Is it possible to get out of working boxing day? On the other hand going to work might recharge your batteries? X

TinselInDisgrace · 22/12/2010 11:18

Oh solo, I'm so sorry that your H has been such a twat. Your poor kids. He has absolutely no right to abandon them after this news or at Christmas. Indeed, the thing they need now more than anything is reassurance that their daddy is still there for them and will not abandon them. Sadly, he's sending the message that he will abandon them and put himself/the OW first. This is completely inaccepable.

I think you should probably prepare yourself for all kinds of access games in which he uses the kids as pawns. My dad used to do this to me and my sister as kids and it really hurts. One time he'd promised to take us to Disney world and booked it all up. We were all packed and ready to go and he never turned up. Turns out he decided to take my aunt and cousins instead. They all went on and on about how wonderful it was when they came back. My mum's best friends arranged to take us camping for the week instead (unlike my dad, they are good people). I could give other examples.

Now, I'm not suggesting that your H is going to do anything so calculated and utterly despicable to your kids (and I sincerely hope he doesn't). But he's shown that he's quite happy to abandon them at Christmas while they come to terms with the consequences of his choices, just to spite you because you aren't under his control any longer.

I think you're going to be very glad that you've got a solicitor's appointment booked in the new year.

More constructively, I think you want to get your PILs as involved with the kids and access arrangements as possible here. If nothing else, he is far less likely to let them down when he'll have to explain himself to his parents. It also shows the kids that their family has not disappeared, even if the living arrangements have changed.

I hope today went as well as it could.

Teaandchristmascakeplease · 22/12/2010 11:22

Oh Solo he is a swine. Thinking of you X

perfectstorm · 22/12/2010 11:40

Really good post from kettlescrisps.

Plan the Christmas you and your kids need. M&S have fabulous Christmas food all done for you - stuffed turkey crown, potatoes, parnsips, the lot all in separate foil trays that you whack in and pull out of the oven and then no washing up as the trays are binnable. My FIL always uses those! All the veggies and sauces as well. If you think your kids may not want a meal out after this news, then it might be easier than having to worry about getting the meal together. And all snuggling in bed with the telly sounds a lovely idea, I think.

A very, very gentle mention that not all solicitors are created equal. If you don't get a good feeling from yours, get another free appointment from another. If you live anywhere in the West Country, I can make a solid recommendation. Obviously mediation is key, here, but solid legal advice on what your position actually is is IMO very much a source of strength as you enter that process.

I hope your PIL are being a real tower of strength to you. I wish I could just come over with a bottle of something and give you a huge hug. (Yeah, not very MN but sod it.) In fact I wish the women on this thread all could. Nobody deserves that level of support nore than you do. I'm in awe at how decent and non-bitter and brave you've been. There is no justice in life - but those qualities will mean you rebuild yours into something amazing after you get through this awful, awful time.

horsesandchickens · 22/12/2010 11:47

Solost agree with nearly everything that has been said.

Not sure about locks etc. I would be wary of being too extreme, as you don't want to get into a tit for tat fight. You can escalate things suuficiently quickly if his tantrum doesn't ease.

Although I think you can rely well on your own advice there, you are acting with remarkable calm and dignity.

perfumeditsawonderfullife · 22/12/2010 11:50

solost I am so, so sorry. What a shit!

I think we all knew he would do this, he clearly has plans with BB and never had any intention of coming. I think you should tell pil and ask them to be with you when you tell the children. The thought of doing it is worse than the reality. They will be upset but will cope. Loads of marriages break up and people look back later and marvel at how far they have come from all the upset.

This is a terrible time of the year to have to do this. Ill or not, abandoning his kids at Christmas is wrong.

FWIW, I think you sound like a wonderful mum and all you are guilty of is loving them so much you want to protect them from this pain, and you can't. x

TheBeefyDwt · 22/12/2010 12:02

Hello Solost - long time no post - I've been away and have spent last night and this morning catching up with both old and new threads (detail and all - I'm in Yorkshire too, btw - it's a big place though!). Sending you a gruff, MN style hug this horrible morning.

I have to say that having read more than a week's posts in one go, I'm not tremendously surprised to see the turn this has taken - although like WWIFN, I expected that he'd take another tack, to deflect attention with a financial crisis or something which made it 'a bad idea to tell the kids now, we don't know WHAT will happen'.

Started writing this before the latest phonecall this morning, and am just editing the MASSIVE (!) post I've written urging you to tell them - I'm so glad, despite the way it's come about now, that that's what you're doing. Thank God. It WILL get better from here on in. Some of what I'd written might still help, maybe.

As an outsider, it is crystal clear that he has been manipulating you. But, I would say don't feel bad that you can't (couldn't?) see it in quite the same way. Your position is unique in that you know him better than anyone else, and yet are also now in a position that makes you the one most in the dark - as it is YOU that his manipulation is focused on. I can imagine that this must be one of the most difficult parts of being the betrayed partner. All your very complex, long-learned patterns of knowing and relating to this man have been ripped up. A bit like trying to operate an upgraded version of a program you know inside out. You keep pressing the wrong buttons, but it's so automatic, you can't help carrying on pressing them Smile

Wrt the situation right now, it doesn't really matter to what degree his 'breakdown' was 'real'. As someone said further upthread, what's happening is that he's had a massive reality check, really for the first time since he left. In HIS eyes (though really, this is nonsense) the children knowing means that It Is Real, It Is Permanent. And all of a sudden, Mr. Love-Of-My-Life, Bye-Bye-Wife-And-Family, Sorry-Kids! is a snivelling, shivering wreck. That tells you all you need to know about how his fantasy new life has worked out. He's made the biggest mistake of his life, and he knows it. Cruel fate, eh? The latest phonecall - I think you're REALLY now seeing a glimpse of the anger which shows what a nasty, controlling little silent bully he is. He knows he's come to the end of the line with managing to control your response to what he's done. It's amazing when you look back that he did manage it for so long - what an actor! - but basically up til now, when your parenting instincts tell you that it has to stop, he's dictated the way the family THAT HE LEFT should manage living without him (how: well naturally in a manner that portrays him in the best light possible! He can't be the baddie, can he? He's perfect!)

When I say that his perception of the children knowing as being the 'endpoint' is nonsense, what I mean is that he can't see that that point has already been reached. This hasn't all been happening in a vacuum. Their Dad hasn't been there since August. They will have known and understood FAR FAR more of your state of mind than you may think. You know that they are now being damaged by the stress of the situation. The fact is that, whatever happens in the future, EVEN if you got back together, this situation is happening to THEIR FAMILY right now, and they need an explanation for it, and to be able to talk to the adults they trust, and start processing it. I'm so glad you're telling them. You know that this is the case, and that their welfare should come first. We don't even need to discuss his opinion on this - someone who uses as their ultimate threat that they 'will never see the children again' - won't ever understand the real parent's desire to put the child's need ahead of their own. As a father, those words should never have come out of his mouth. More shame for him there, than for all the weeks of betrayal with BB put together. Don't forget those words, should you ever start thinking that the family could come back together. That's who this man really is, Solost.

What might happen now?

  1. This totally ABSURD Eastenders-style cliffhanger moment that he has whipped up will, well, evaporate. The children almost certainly won't turn their backs on him - but there WILL be a massive sense of relief for both you and they, and you can sit down with them (and maybe PILs too) and start working out what kind of Christmas you'd like to have, and what happens from here on in. So he's not going to be around - good. Who knows what will happen in the future. He'll certainly change his mind on a daily basis, by the looks of it. Focus on the children and PIL, and be thankful that the cause of all this isn't going to show his sulky, FUCKING UNWELCOME face at Christmas.
  1. Mr. Histrionics will get what he sorely needs, whatever the reality of his mental state at the moment - a massive, teeth-cracking SLAP around the chops. He doesn't get to DECIDE whether this is reality, THIS IS REALITY! Yes, you chose this. No, it couldn't stay as a fantasy, because incase you haven't noticed, you've laid waste to your entire family by what you've done. If he's simply trying to manipulate and control you, it's the best thing that could happen. If he's genuinely stopped coping now that the path he's chosen looks rocky, it's also the best thing that could happen, because this limbo can't continue. This morning's phonecall of course suggests the latter! He's better now, then, is he? Breakdown's over and he's back to aggressive shouting, blaming, feeling sorry for himself? (The man who left for another woman!!!)

Note that WWIFN was right - no suicide attmept for our Mr. Solost. His form has rather been to choose to hurt other people instead of himself, hasn't it though? Long-term threats such as not seeing the children EVER AGAIN! (gasp) are just silly, as is all this whining about control. Well yes, when you abandon your children, they do rather become the responsibility of the parent left with sole care of them, no? And as others have said, if he does ultimately choose to distance himself from them, they're much better off without him.

Finally (Thank God, I hear you cry)- if you are tempted to feel sorry for him in this state, to rationalise this morning's phonecall - just stop and think. The feeling of total fear, disbelief that your world is crumbling around you, panic as to what you can do to hold on to what you want - remember when YOU felt that way? That's right, back in August. When he told you that he'd met someone else, and was leaving you with your three children, to manage on your own, thanks for the memories, bye. What did you do? Threaten him that if he left YOU'D leave and never see the children again? Smash things up to try and frighten him into staying? No. You acted like a parent and a mature person in the face of the most terrible shock. What a difference between the two of you, now that his moment for fear has come. Never forget that he saw you in this position of fear and dread, and what did he do...?

...walked away.

Yes he is despicable. He put the phone down? Bonus. Leave it down. You don't have anything to gain from speaking to him. Great news about him not being there for Christmas. When you do speak to him, make sure he knows that now you know he's willing to hurt the children to control the situation between you, that all bets are off - he'll get no more special dispensation from you. That you want a divorce and formalisation of finances as soon as possible, and that you look forward to you and the children moving on without him and beig HAPPY.

WhenwillIfeelnormal · 22/12/2010 12:07

Solost I PM'd you back earlier this morning. This is a horrible task for you, but it is so much better for your DCs that everything is out in the open.

In terms of what happens now, everyone is quite right that the solicitor's appointment is looking like the wisest move ever. If he is prepared to do what he has done this morning, he will screw you all over financially, in a heatbeat.

Regarding locks, I think there is disproportionate fear on Mumsnet about the act of changing the locks. This is civil law, not criminal law. Once he left that house in August, he ceased to have the right to treat it as his second home, regardless of property ownership. In Solost's shoes, I would always balance the risk of him suing me and taking out an injunction, with him invading my privacy when he felt like it and given this week's events, turning up drunk and unstable and putting me and potentially the DCs in fear. I'd change the locks every time, based on that risk assessment.

However, that's perhaps for the New Year now.

Horses and Chickens I am sorry if this thread and some posts touched a nerve. Threads can do that, for sure. I've got the most enormous amount of sympathy for anyone enduring a mental health challenge, but quite apart from my scepticism that this was genuine, even if it had been true, then the fact remains that other people in his life needed protection from its effects.

I think this morning's events have finally shown that he wasn't a tortured soul suffering a personality transplant enacted by a dastardly OW, but a manipulative, conniving, controlling and sinister individual. Solost might look back on this morning and recognise it as her watershed moment, when the scales finally dropped from her eyes.

perfumeditsawonderfullife · 22/12/2010 12:10

Very well said Beefy.

thumbplumpuddingwitch · 22/12/2010 12:19

WWIFN - just want to add somethign re. changing locks, from experience - even if you do it, unless there is evidence that you would be in danger from him having access to the house, he can demand a key to the new lock.
My sis changed the locks immediately her H left her. I can't remember whether it was through solicitors or police (it was a few years ago) but she was advised she had acted illegally and needed to let him have a key for the new locks - so it became an expensive waste of time.

However - if there is a danger in him having access, measures can be taken to prevent him from doing so.

TheBeefy - many good points in your post.

msboogie · 22/12/2010 12:25

the man is a thundering gobshite! I suspected that the recent shenanigans were the self indulgent, manipulative result of a drunken row with BB about Christmas and it looks like she's had her way in the end. I hope they both have the most godawful miserable fucking Christmas as they deserve. Solost please don't pick up the phone to him again over Christmas. Leave him to his 'soulmate'. I hope you and the children are ok.

WhenwillIfeelnormal · 22/12/2010 12:28

Yes Thumb, I know it's unlawful, there's no dispute about that, but I often think posters think that this is criminal law and that they could be arrested and charged using the criminal standard of proof. That's not the case, as it's civil law.

What I'm saying is that posters should conduct a realistic risk assessment of the likelihood of him going to that amount of trouble. FWIW, I suspect this man would go to the trouble, but it would take him some time and add extra hassle to his life and the only thing Solost will be compelled to do at the end of it all is hand over a key, having had a few weeks or months peace knowing that her home is her sanctuary. That would be worth it to me, every time. Smile

thumbplumpuddingwitch · 22/12/2010 12:30

Fair enough and good point :)

perfectstorm · 22/12/2010 12:42

I know someone who changed the lock because her ex used to let themselves in and saunter around, and take what in hell they fancied removing. Best move she ever made - and she says so herself a year on. The ex squealed and whined but did nothing about it, and it hasn't altered any of the legal processes.

I think a boundary like that is important, myself.

bitingfairy · 22/12/2010 13:06

Another lurker who has followed, but not posted - you've had so much good advice from others I haven't felt the need to. I'm posting now because of your worries about his MH. I've had my own MH issues in the past, and have also worked in the MH field for several years, including at the pointy end of inpatients and crisis management.

MH crises can show themselves in all sorts of different ways, and it's different from person to person. The fluctuations you're seeing might not be a deliberate and calculating move on his part. He may well be really feeling those things at the time, even if that doesn't last for any length of time. However, he is still an adult, making adult decisions and although they may be stupid ones, they are his to live with for good or bad.

If he is having a mental health crisis, the people closest to him should be dealing with it. At the moment that means BB and his parents. He is not alone in this. He took the decision about your involvement with his future health problems out of your hands months ago when he left for the "love of his life"/"soul mate". They will not be alone with it either - even over the holiday period there are services in place for crises and assessments and he will be seen and supported by professionals if necessary. It takes more than a few minutes to work out what is really going on with someones MH - it can take hours/days or weeks sometimes.

After such a long time together it would really be something if you were able to not feel anything about his recent odd behaviour, so don't feel bad about your compassion - it shows you are human. BUT it should be tempered with all the other things that have happened over the last few months/years. You know that your kids are the most important thing, and one of the best things you can do for them is look after yourself as well as you can. You are their rock and their constant. This means that you will have to trust that your ILs will deal with any crises and let them do it. It is not your job any more.

I would treat anything said by H at the moment with an enormous pinch of salt. Especially sweeping threats like never seeing the kids etc - they're either part of the MH crisis or a calculated move to shake you depending on how cynical we are. But either way, they're irrelevant. Would you really want him around anyway if he carried them out? I would cancel Christmas Day out and arrange for the ILs to have the kids Boxing Day if you still have to work. If nothing else, you will know where you stand and will be able to make arrangements to suit you and the kids, rather than changing things at the last minute. It sounds like H is at very least unpredicatable at the moment.

I really hope that telling the kids has gone ok (or as well as these things can go), and that now that it's out of the way there will be space for you all to heal and move on. A new start in the New Year.