Can anyone talk to me about sub/dom relationships?

[CuriousSub]

Right, well, I have been here a loooong time but have name changed for this.

I came to these boards when I found out about my stbxh's affair and the advice here was great and really helped. I went through hell for 3 years but I am now in the process of divorcing him.

So now I am testing the water and have frequented some dating sites and have been speaking to a gorgeous guy who is far too young for me and we got to talking about what we like. It turns out I love being dominated and he was looking for a sub.

Sooo, we have been texting, emailing and now speaking to each other and the whole idea is driving me mad with desire. I am actually short of breath when he suggests things.

This is something I hadn't even thought about before but I definitely want to see this through. He wants to meet and I would love to.

But I wanted to ask here is anyone has been/is a sub? What is expected of you? Where is the best place to look for advice/ideas?

Sorry, I know it isn't Friday yet - but nearly!!

no, Eton is where you spunk on a isn't it ?

then dare each other to eat it

a totally different concept

Have you been, AF??

I work with a guy who went there. Shall I ask him??

here

the urban dictionary tells me all I need to know

i am a slave to my wife, but will she take it to the bedroom!!!!!!!!! NO

Namechanged for this.

Hi CuriousSub, I've been lurking, but decided to add my pennies' worth.

I am in a situation similar to yours, but with one big difference. I am married and have young children. I am not unhappy in my marriage - only sexually frustrated. I have spoken to my dh numerous times about wanting to be sexually dominated, but he seems either unwilling or unable to accommodate me in this regard.

I too have met a man online - we have been chatting since the beginning of August. My dh is not aware of this online activity. I know how lovely these online chats can be (we have also been emailing and phoning and texting each other) - in fact, it can be very intoxicating. I feel it has changed my life for the better, as I laugh easier and little problems at home, that would normally get me down, seems more bearable.

I have started a thread about my situation a while ago and too ran into an enormous amount of ignorance (but also a lot of understanding, helpful advice and support - for which I was very grateful). I have accepted the criticism I received, in regard to the betrayal of my dh, as I deserved it. I however did not (and still don't) accept the abuse (perhaps too strong a word) I received from certain people, in regard to my sexual preferences.

The point is CuriousSub, that sexual desires such as ours are not illegal, but society with its narrow mindedness, finds it hard to accept them and instead imposes certain norms of behaviour on both men and women. Which in my opinion, by their very restrictiveness cause many a relationship to break down. Variety is the spice of life and the usual sexual practices are quite frankly boring (for me, in any case).

Are you still meeting your man on Saturday? If so, I hope that he is all you hope him to be.

< giggle >

also for a very sex-positive and hilarious advice colomnist, check out Dan Savage. I worship him and get very grumpy if I can't listen to his podcasts regularly.

uh.. I meant 'columnist'.. almost made up a word there

Sorry, been lurking. I'm in NZ so can't keep up with the conversation at the same pace

Given that one of Dittany's main points is that women have been brainwashed, SurreyAmazon is hardly going to convince her by calling spunk "the Elixir of Life".

Even I think you're brainwashed on that one!

I have said this before on this subject and I will say it again.

I will not change my sexual behavior just because someone says so

How is adjusting your sexual preferences, responses and behavior to something else, something that someone else deems to be 'acceptable' for a woman to feel, how is that feminism?

I am only coming back to this thread to see if anyone's got the real legend of Jesus and the Jizz sorted out yet?

I'd like to ask Dittany how you feel about SM Dykes:

www.smdykes.org.uk/

Surely they're not just doing it for men's benefit?

I can understand what you are saying Isawmommy, it is intoxicating. Personally, I dont blame you for finding someone just to fill that gap in your life.

I am going to meet him tomorrow. He has even told me what to wear. I am very excited and will let you know that all was ok next week.

Have you met your other man Isawmommy yet?? We have been building up to this for a few weeks now and I find the anticipation is such a big part of this. I feel like I continually have adrenalin rushing through me - I dont want the feeling to stop!

Hi Curious,

No, unfortunately I have not met him - he lives on another continent. He wants to come to me, but I've aksed him not to, for obvious reasons.

Good luck for tomorrow - I am very, very jealous.

I feel like that too, dittany

If any of you encouraging ladies had seen CS's deleted post, you might be saying something completely different.

CS...have you completely forgotten those feelings you admitted to just a couple of days ago ?

'she pretty much described being in self destruct mode and said that she didn't care if this turns out badly because her safety doesn't interest her as she's been having such a crap time recently.'

This was how I felt too - I was in a bad place at the time and I just though it didn't matter if he injured me. People were asking me what on earth I'd been up to and I felt detached from it really. I discussed this with my therapist - she commented on how sad that was.

@ Anyfucker ? I thought I would check in for an update. Having milked the DH dry of his sperm, have you seen the face of god yet? Any idea of when the second coming will be? .

@ Miranda - I love the last part of your post, especially about being more proactive. @ I must check with him that he not self-medicating for pain.

@ Ballonsayer - www.letmegooglethatforyou.com

@ Dittany ? Unlike you, I am not trying to persuade or convert anyone to my way of thinking. My goal here is to inform and engage in a collaborative debate. You are right in saying that the Great Mother was overthrown by the Son (Sun ? I have added this for the benefit of those who think I believe Jesus was a real man and not a mythical one) and a patriarchal priesthood established. However, the erasure and destruction that you speak of only took place in certain parts of the world. Serpent aka goddess worship is the oldest religion known to man, and is still very much alive.

As for your comment ?saying men shouldn't hit women in the name of sex or anything else is hardly controversial from that point of view?. You are quite right. It is not controversial if argued from a conventional vantage point. Would I go into a thread on domestic abuse and wax lyrically about endorphins and orgasms to a woman who was punched in the head so hard that she passed out? No I would not. Completely different context and audience.

Heh@ sacrament of the spunk. It really is true what they say about pearls before swine (cue jokes about pearl necklaces from the gallery).

@ Curioussub ? So you decided to go ahead with it then? Good luck and I hope it goes well for you. I sincerely mean that. There is something profound to be gained from this, and I have come to realize that dabblers are predestined to miss it, so I hope you experience it for what it really is.

Noooo SurreyAmazon I don't want to google it and have it turn up on my History. I want yoooooooou to tell me.

, well I don't want it on my history either!. But since it's Friday, here you go;

Jesus answered her, "If you knew the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to you, "Give me a drink,' you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water." 11 The woman said to him, "Sir, you have no bucket, and the well is deep. Where do you get that living water?...15 The woman said to him, "Sir, give me this water, so that I may never be thirsty or have to keep coming here to draw water." 16 Jesus said to her, "Go, call your husband, and come back." (John

4:10-16)

?Living water? in this context refers to semen, which literally is the liquid of life. As Christ indicates, drinking of the ?living water? provides a spiritual replenishment for the soul. When the woman asks Jesus where she can get this ?water?, he tells her to fetch her husband, clearly with the intention of instructing her on how to fellate him and swallow his semen.

Source; sacredsemen.com/

SA

< Imagines all the men saying "but you have to swallow, don't you know it's sacred - god told me" >