I don't fancy him anymore because he farts ALL THE TIME

[CaroJo]

I'm sorry. I know how ridiculous this title sounds and I have thought long and hard whether to post in the first place...but I really don't know what else to do.

DP and I have only been together for 5 years (getting married in 6 months), we are only in our 20s and already our sex life has dwindled to almost nothing. The reason for this is me not fancying him anymore - physically that is. I know how shallow and selfish this sounds but to me love and sex have always been two separate things. While I love DP as a person and find his personality attractive, I can't get over the fact that he farts all the time. ALL THE TIME, every day. Proper loud trumps, on average 3 times an hour, often more. The first thing I hear of him in the morning, is a massive fart. The last thing I hear before I go to sleep, is a massive fart.

I have reached the point where all I associate with the physical side of our relationship is FART! I feel like such a cow. Surely at this point in our relationship I should fancy the pants off him, no?

When I tell him how I feel, he doesn't seem to get the message how big of a deal his issue is to me. How can I get married like this? I seriously don't know what to do...I know how trivial this sounds compared to the problems other people have on here but I'm really questioning this relationship and myself :(

I don't think this is a funny thread- I think it's sad. And I do think that it shows a lack of respect rather than intimacy, because Caro has told him how much she hates it and they are no longer having sex as a consequence, but he is still badgering her. What is funny about that?

BoF - I agree there is nothing funny about the OP' post but there are some funny comments within the thread and - because of that - I don't want the OP to lose sight of the seriousbess of exactly what she was originally asking.

He needs to look at his diet
He is somewhat fowl and vulgar
Dont blame you finding him totally unattractive
ASt least he coudl try to fart somewhere private
You must explain to him that his habits are putting you off him, and though you love him, his farting is just not pleasant. . AT ALL !!
Its not pathetic an shallow of you to fuss about this . . . you are only human and want to love the man you are about to marry. . .but god, you dont want him farting in the church during the wedding ceremony do you ?
Beg him to sort this out now you are young. . .imagine living with this and how even more fowl it will be when you are both 65- 85 yrs. . . . .uuurrgghhh !

marantha - yes, it is. Very effective in undermining someone and taking the p...

marantha - I think it is called another way of showing your lack of respect to the other person (different from OP's situation obviously!)

You made a funny comment earlier on BoF - said 'the wind has blown her into the spare room so far' which is directly linked to the fact they are sleeping seperately!

:o

what a funny thread-

Lady, why the ? - farting can be funny, and the OP is laughing at points (because otherwise she'd cry). I'm not trying to be holier-than-though, but the overall situation is not funny (in my opinion). If the issue were a bit less comedic- say chronic BO which he wouldn't attempt to address unless he was going out to work or meeting others, then I think people would see this for what it is more easily: a big two fingers to his partner's feelings.

Sorry Bof. :)

This is so sad. This man MUST see his GP and get himself checked out.
He must take OP's feelings into account or things will just get worse.
FWIW my ex used to eat with his mouth open - some mornings the only sound at breakfast was him chewing his toast. I tried sitting at the same side of the table so I didn't have to look at him, but I could still hear him chewing. I tried teasing, then being reasonable then gave up. Gross personal habits are a huge sexual turn-off IMO.
He also used to pick his nose while driving and wipe the contents on the side of his seat. Only found out about this when I was driving car and put my hand on the crusty bits.
OP, please note this man is now EX.
Get him to wise up now or this won't end well.