The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Carry On Past The Vineyard.

[Mouseface]

Welcome to the Bus!

I'm Mouse and you'll find me snuggled sat at the back where it's warmest!

If you're sober, drinking, or somewhere between the two, you are more than welcome on board.

No judging, no cliquey groups and no closed minds here, oh no! Chances are, no matter how bad you may be feeling right now, one of the Brave Babes will have been there too!

So, come say hi.

And, to read the last thread and other journeys so far, follow this link

Hey Ma - taking you on a special trip to serenity, if at least for a few hours - close your eyes - picture the place you would most like to be right now - beach, forest, hills - concentrate on your breathing in and out and try not to let any other thoughts enter your mind - just keep your eyes closed and breathe - or if not now when you go to bed. Thinking of you lovely xxx

I was typing stuff and I lost it, but that is just fine 'cos Silver and Wasindie are wonderful.

demented you will find your place again.

oh thank you wasindie and silver -I'm going to bed now. tomorrow is another day, your posts are more appreciated than you will ever know.
I love this bus

Night Ma - try the breathing thing - it really does work Hon xxxx You just have to focus your whole mental energy on your breathing - simple xx

Hey Wasindie - all I really mean is that when you get a chance (and I know with DTs that's not easy) just try the breathing thing to relax - I went to a hypnotist to stop smoking and came away with a way to completely relax. Didin't stop me smoking but it taught me relaxation techniques that I have used ever since ... none of you namby pamby hippy stuff (apologies to anyone I have offended there) but it works - posting this and then i will come and give a step by step thing that i was taught.. xxxx

Echoing what the others have said demented, take care and sleep well. I'm beginning to notice a change in my parents too, they're becoming more like children and it's difficult.

I would welcome some advice please - I posted about my ex coming back into my life and us thinking about giving it another go. The first time around was a complete whirlwind, I was pissed all the time and terribly emotional and we fell madly in love/lust but it all imploded after a few short months. I don't really know why it ended but I haven't really stopped thinking about him or him about me (we split 9 months ago). I've been very open with him now about my alcoholism and associated issues and he's been really understanding about it. We need to go really slow and there won't be any sex until I know how I feel about him. But he's already telling me how much he loves me and how desperate he is to be with me again. This after 9 months of nothing.

I've told him we need to rebuild things but base it on friendship and I know if he can't respect that I'll not continue. I'm very glad I'm not drinking because it will give me much more control than I had before (which was virtually none). But part of me can't help wondering if I'm doing the right thing - am I deluded to think it can work this time?

dipso of course the answer is that no-one can ever know whether it will work out this time, but you certainly could have a lot of fun finding out. In fact it MUST be fun while you are finding out - or what it the point?

I suppose if I were in your position I'd be thinking about what went on (good and bad) the previous time and what had changed since then. For both of you.

You have acknowledged your drinking, and have stopped, but what has changed for him? Has he matured a little? is he looking for something with the same spark but without all the carnage/destruction Or is he expecting to find exactly the same dipso as he met the last time? If it was the latter then I'd be worried that he had fallen for the drunk me and had not yet had time to know and love the sober me. I think I'd also be alittle worried that if I though he liked the drunk me it might just be the temptation that would tip me back into my old ways.

None of this is meant to be negative, and I think you are doing exactly the right thing to talk it slow (ish) and become friends. And remember - anticipation is 9/10ths of the pleasure

RIGHT are we ready............

If you can, find a quiet place to sit or lie down

start with concentrating on your breathing - in and out - in and out - focus on that and that alone - just your natural breathing - in and out - focus on your chest raising and lowering as you breathe - in and out...as you concentrate your mind you will feel yourself staring to relax ....

Next curl your feel up and tense them - then let go

Then your calf muscles - tense and let go

Still feel your breathing - it will become more easy and gentle.

now your knees and thighs - really tense those muscles and then relax

Next your waist and lower back - tense the muscles - hold for a minute - then relax.

again feel your breathing - relaxed and calm

Now tense your upper back and chest - and relax

your shoulders

Now your upper arms

your lower arms

clench your hands into fists and then relax.

NOW remember to keep your breathing long and regular and tense all the muscles in your neck - hold - then realax

Finally scrunch up your face until you can feel all the muscles getting tight - hold it - and RELAX.

Hopefully by now you will be very physically relaxed.

try to take your mind to your own particular place of beauty and SLEEP - if you have a mediation or relaxation CD play it while doing the above.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz - works for me and I hope it might for you lot

Dipso hard one to anticipate but I think Wasandie's advice is fantastic - would he be open to that? xxx

If you're there Zany, fill us in on how your date tonight went:)

Thanks Venus and Wasindie. He did do a fair bit of drinking when we were together but has told me that lately he's lost interest and that he wants to support me in my attempts to not drink. Venus you make a good point about him expecting to find the old dipsomaniac! I think my fiery and emotional side was a bit much for him at times so he might welcome someone a bit calmer....

But the main thing as you say "Wasindie" is that if I can stay sober, the drink won't be doing any of the talking for me. I am sort of intrigued and excited about seeing him again and doing a LOT of talking.

wasindie - you shouldn't be here, you should be writing your reports . Although if you're anything like me, you'll tell yourself that you write better when you are under pressure.

(I am now retreating back up the thread to read Silver's post)

wasindie - Scottish Shaman sounds like some mad ceilidh band!

Silver the secret hippy

• AM NOT AM NOT AM NOT - but secretly always would have liked to be hippy xxx