The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Carry On Past The Vineyard.

[Mouseface]

Welcome to the Bus!

I'm Mouse and you'll find me snuggled sat at the back where it's warmest!

If you're sober, drinking, or somewhere between the two, you are more than welcome on board.

No judging, no cliquey groups and no closed minds here, oh no! Chances are, no matter how bad you may be feeling right now, one of the Brave Babes will have been there too!

So, come say hi.

And, to read the last thread and other journeys so far, follow this link

Hi guys,

well, we are all fed and watered, I seem to have got over the two weeks that was this afternoon!!

Thank you all so much for your help and support. Don't know what I would have done without your message Venus.

I am just going to go and have a long hot bath, accompanied by the delightful sound of the xbox! (actually really is lovely to know Dc in and happy), and am very very glad that I didn't go to the shops.

Thanks for your post forthe, you are right feeling mizz is a natural reaction, it's just that my usual reaction to it, is to reach for the wine. But I have proved that I can not do it. For today, anyway.

Happy evenings and good sleeps everyone [big kisses icon]

Going to say goodnight to you all too.

Thank you for being here Brave Babes. Without this thread and you guys posting, my days would be very lonely at times.

And without a doubt, my 'wobbles' much bigger!

Silver - if I have missed you, I hope that by now you have thawed out lovely. I'll be here in the morning with steaming hot drinks and food for those who are on the bus.

Sleep well Brave Babes.

Rest well all xx

hello lovely ladies and thankyou for being so welcoming..

My story is simple but different I guess.

I HAVE IT ALL.

no money worries, a huge house , 2 gorgeous happy healthy children at private school , a cleaner, gardener and full time live in nanny housekeeper and a lovely if rather grumpy husband.

I spend 20k a year on holidays , drive a flash car and would think nothing of spending £500 on a handbag.

I have all of this because I work in a job that is always 60 hours a week......with massive pressure, targets .staff management , wingeing clients etc. I am constantly available by email on my blackberry and never get a break. The whole family rely on me to keep up this life and Im trapped.

I never even had any time off on materity leave and have always worked under this pressure.

I drink to shut it out. At least a bottle a night and usually more. Its my one pleasure ( ! )

I never drink before 6pm and its usally gone 8 but I guzzle it down like water and cant stop.

Its my friend saviour etc. Im 3 stone over weight and constantly tired / hungover and I want more than anything to stop.

Can I still stay on the bus or will you all hate me for being so lucky in this world.....

of course you can stay on the bus. We all have one thing in common - we drink too much. some more than others, but all too much.If you share that with us, then you are welcome aboard and I/we look forward to getting to know you. I live in a 2 bedroom flat which is so overcrowded that DD2 live with my mother most of the week. I work but have a vast amount of debt, a leaking roof, old wooden windows which threaten to drop out in a gale, and mould on the DC's bedroom wall. I endure, rather than love DH, and see little hope of better days in the near future. I have no cleaner, gardener, expensive holidays or private schools - but I am worried about my alcohol consumption and I washed up here. As did you. And all the others. We might have different lifestyles but we all have the same problems.
welcome.

thanks dm.

I have had a glass and a half tonight and Im off to bed now.

Tomorrow I will not drink. Maybe the day after but not tomorrow.

Just to show I can have one day without.

I havent read the whole thread yet but will do.

Lets be strong together

onthbackseat I'm a newbie but have read may times that you will not be judged for having it all or having nothing so you can forget about that

Your drinking pattern sounds like mine infact I doubt many of my friends would say I am a big drinker as I rarely drink in company. I drink lot's late at night - 9pm & I will then sit up just to drink 2 bottles of wine.

I'm day one & not drinking tonight

a glass and a half is good, onthe.
tomorrow is another day.
read the whole thread if you have time, it will let you know that you are not alone.
Off to bed now
stay strong Babes

Ah ma you beat me to it

onthebackseat You sound very low, despite all your 'luck' - welcome aboard. We have all felt as low and desperate as you are feeling now, so stay on board and join in with the ride.

Well done for taking the first steps, by stopping drinking tonight and posting here. We will look forward to 'seeing' you again tomorrow.

Hi onthe I'm a newy too and haven't got to day one yet, only a glass and a half is really good. Everyone on this thread has been lovely and offers lots of support whether you are in debt or have no money worries as I hope to do (offer support I mean. lol)

I have had 3 glasses but this is the least no of glasses of wine I have had for a long time, possibly years.

Don't want to be hungover for my date tomorrow

Hi to backseat - yes in worldly term you have it all, but at the moment it is not a life that I would want to live, it doesn't sound as though it is making you deliriously happy.

But as others have said, this is not an exclusive club, there are no joining rules, if you want to post here (or want to lurk) you've probably got all the membership credentials that you need - i.e. alcohol has the wrong place in your life at the moment, and that has the potential to ruin all that you have (whether it's a lot, or whether it's a little).

Just one word of warning backseat - and that is that this is the oh 12th, or 13th, or 14th thread - since May! You can find links back to them all, and it makes interesting reading (although I am sure that i repeat myself frequently and contradict myself even more) - but you'll need to stop working 60 hour weeks if you want to read all the back history . Never mind, just join in from here.

OOh zany, I'd forgotten about your date. Have fun, and really and truly don't rely oon dutch courage - those beer goggles always come off in the morning

Welcome backseat. The support here is fantastic. Stay on the bus and share the ride.

evening all!!, had a bit of day of it here! why does everything seem to implode at once?

im bloody knackered and still working, dd is being an absolute PITA right now and i think its my fault - i think im about the weakest parent ever and now im paying the price - we need to get her back into some direction with her education choices but of course 'i know nothing'! one of my problems is that my own mother tried (and still does) to have such control over me as a teenager that i have gone too far the other way - this does not sit well with dh as we have quite different parenting styles! the conversation has been going round in circles all day with us all becoming more and more frustrated with each other and then she has just swaned in and out like there is not a care in the world!! aarrgghhhh!!!

nice to meet you onthebackseat!!

as you can see, we are a pretty mixed bunch, we all struggle with the same thing though - nothing will get solved until we knock the booze on the head! - i have to say, you will feel a damn sight better once you can wake up without the 'alcohol draggy' feeling!, as a family we are going through it a bit right now, business, money, teenager, not one thing is without a problem!, i could never have coped with it all if i was still drinking, in fact, i know it would have turned a bad dream into a bloody nightmare!so, give it a try tomorrow, and take the next day as it comes!!, every little helps!

Can't sleep.
Making a mess of this week, though on the outside I look hugely successful.
I'm so tired.

morning all
noteven what's up? What are you making a mess of and how can you/we fix it?
Got a tricky day ahead - got to take rather senile father to dentist to have two teeth out,two days after having an abscess removed from his mouth/jaw. Bleurgh!
Should be at work but have the most understanding boss on the planet, for which i am truly grateful.
Better go and get DS out of bed - either he's learnt how to purr or he's got the flea ridden cat in there under the duvet.....

Good morning all,

noteven I hope you managed to get a few hours sleep, 5am is the worst time to try and make sense of things, I have done it many times. It is truly horrible.
New day today though, come on here and talk it through, if you would like to. We want to help. :)

Off to work now. See you later, and thanks for yesterday. :)

Morning everyone - off out to work today (rather than sitting around catching up with things on this thread). See you all this evening no doubt.

morning everyone
just checking in
nice evening last night with dh back from london, and no arguments yet so that's something. I guess I should say that's day 1 and see how far we get. I'm back on day one today for wine as well. Had 3 glasses of wine last night instead of the 2 that I wanted. lack of self control so big kick up the backside for me.

been awake since 330 this morning with ds1 who has a temp and cold. so a bit of a zombie here.

dememnted hope it goes ok today for you and your pa.

yes I was daddywillbehomesoon, whoever asked. I am going through a bit of an identity crisis on here so will try another name soon enough I think.

Have put a bit of weight back on in the last week as have been indulging just a couple of glasses every night - dh was away so in my stupid mind it was ok to drink as he wouldn't be getting drunk and either blaming me for it or having an argument. Needless to say he got really drunk on a number of nights in London and we went back over old ground and he was, quite basically, a shithead. Parents were witness to it and are trying to help me with a longish term exit plan. I just don't know where to start though.

anyway, positive thoughts - have some invoices to do, and clients to chase for payment so that'll keep me busy, after I've baked bread with the invalid off school and dome some ironing (of dh's shirts no less, what a good wife I am, if only he would realise that )

Backseat, it sounds as though you work too hard, rather than drink to hard. If you are dealing with your problems in the order they are going to kill you, you might want to look at that one first.

Otherwise, try checking in here every night and trying not to drink, or to drink less, one day at a time.

Is it worth it, or do you absolutely need the holidays, etc?

I always tell myself that I am not powerless.

morning all!!, got to be really quick as off to meet a new client! , wish me luck!!!

see you later babes!!

Hi backseat, of course no-one hates you. Don't take this the wrong way, but I wouldn't swop places with you for anything. I'm single and work 22 hours a week in a job I love but the pay is truly pants. Thank God for tax credits. My car is 8 years old but is still running well and looking good. But I have no mortage because I used to have a high-powered job which helped me pay it off.
My home is small but perfectly formed.I go on one holiday a year which is often subsidised by someone else. I have a few nice things and a lot of old things which are nice. In fact everything would be fine and dandy if I learnt not to drink. I've always drunk to cope with things and of course it just makes everything worse eventually. I have been sober nearly 2 weeks and am not missing it, just the thought of it sometimes. I'm the only one on here on Campral but it seems to really help. I'd recommend it.

How have you got yourself into the position of the family relying on you to keep up the lifestyle? You sound very self-aware and that's a great start. You know that drinking to cope with it all is a recipe for disaster and you know you want to stop. Well done :)
You obviously have a lot to look at, not just the drinking, but try and concentrate on that first. Are you intending to drink tonight?

Morning all,

onthe thank you for sharing some of your story. Anyone is welcome on the bus. I think it was venus who said that there are no rules for joining and it's true. Whether you want to cut down or stop completely then this is the place for you.

I have a half day today so I will be leaving at 12.30. Hoping to have some chat/ banter before then x

Morning babes and blokes,

Sorry to dash in and out again. Life is hectic, as I know it is for you all.

Big welcome to the new ladies on the thread. backseat well done for taking the first step. Of course no one hates you - and I wouldn't say that you are 'lucky', you sound as if you have enormous responsibilities both at work and to provide for your family and work damned hard. I know that although we all have different circumstances, many of us battle with the work life balance. I work part time and am self employed and still battle with the working = best for family vs spending time with DD = best for family. There is no perfect answer, we all muddle along and do the best we can.

Mouse things sound shit. You sounded very down yesterday and its quite rational that you rant when you need. You have a lot on, day in day out. You need to rant every now and then, don't apologise for it. FWIW, I think Nemo is lucky to have you for a mummy and I am positive he thinks so too. Sorry I didn't get back to you Sat, I was tucked up in bed by 8pm and its been chaotic every since (in bed with sick DD, not drunk!).

All ok here, work on house is driving me crazy but I can see the end ... I am so behind on work and agreed another new contract because the cost of the work is escalating, but I have no time to work because I am dealing with builders, carpet fitters, sick DD etc.

I had a beer on friday night and a large glass of red wine last night. I don't know if this is me drinking sensibly or some sort of backsliding. I did not drink at a big family party on saturday, which I thought would be tough but I just didn't want to put myself at risk in a difficult environment. One member of my family asked why I wasn't passed out on the floor as per usual. I told him because I had stopped drinking. No further Q's, people are much less interested in our drinking that we assume.

Right, must work, strength and sobriety to you all. Shuffle hugs to Red and wasindie, also has anyone heard from lucil lately?