The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Carry On Past The Vineyard.

[Mouseface]

Welcome to the Bus!

I'm Mouse and you'll find me snuggled sat at the back where it's warmest!

If you're sober, drinking, or somewhere between the two, you are more than welcome on board.

No judging, no cliquey groups and no closed minds here, oh no! Chances are, no matter how bad you may be feeling right now, one of the Brave Babes will have been there too!

So, come say hi.

And, to read the last thread and other journeys so far, follow this link

In my experience the feeling of 'needing' a drink does not last foe ever, so what can you do to prevent yourself from going to the shops now? Go and put your pyjamas on. Get in the bath and wash your hair. Write a list of things that would occupy your hands, and then at random choose 2 of them to do (stick a pin in the piece of paper to choose).

My dd2 is in India. This morning I saw on my computer that she had called me on skype yesterday, and I had missed the call (I must have been in the kitchen). It would have been so lovely to talk to her.

How many dc do you have Thurso? and is your name related to where you live?

thurso - will it make you feel better? I mean really feel better if you get sloshed? Even a little? Or will you feel totally defeated by taking a drink?

Will you beat yourself up much more for drinking or will you praise yourself for telling that craving in your head to fuck the fuck off?

It's much harder for me to stop myself drinking than to give in. If you passed me a glass of Pinot now, I'd gladly take and drink it but then I'd instantly HATE myself for wanting more. And more. And more but I know that I am that way out tonight. Are you?

If you can have just the one or just the two, then go for it. But don't get drunk to blunt your emotions. You will only feel 100 times worse when the bottle is empty.

I don't know a soul who ever found a smile at the bottom of a bottle. Do you?

And, thank you. I'm feeling much better since page 32!

It all gets a bit 'on top' some days. Then I remember what I have to be thankful for, pull up my big girl pants and get on with it!!!!

Thanks Venus, I have got the ironing out, poured out a glass of diet coke, which I hate, and drank it, poured out another one of fizzy lemon and lime, and still feel the same, I think I am going to have to grit my teeth for a bit. Actually writing this, the best thing I can do is to keep thinking that DH and DC2 will be home in an hour.
I don't want to do it for myself right now, but I can make myself do it for them. (How pathetic I sound)
I have also got a blinding headache with the thinking about it all.

Absolutely, Mouse, the way I feel right now, there is no way one or two will suffice, I will just have to get over it, you're right I would feel so much worse if I give in.

I have 2 DC Venus, younger one goes to uni next year, and no, my name was picked off of the map the first morning I found you, and if thinking back to then doesn't stop me, I don't know what will!

Thank you so much for being there, you have no idea what a lifeline you have been.

I have nothing to complain or worry about in comparison to many on here, but I have found the support and help that I could never find (because I won't admit anything) in RL on this thread.

Bless you, phew! drink demon slowly fading.
THANK YOU :)

hi wasindie - I see you've changed your name back - was that what was at the top of your urgent list?

Yesterday my dp was looking for a piece of paper to jot something down while he was on the phone - and he pick up a piece from beside my desk. After his call he turned the paper over and looked very puzzled. He asked me if it was anything important - guess what - various odd unconnected words: mouse, jesus, thurso, for the very last time.... etc. I told him it was my secret friends and he left looking more puzzled than ever.

thurso I am glad that you dh and dc2 are coming home soon. Get the kettle on, it is cold out there and they'll be glad of a nice hot cup of tea. Or even better make them some soup: A tin of tomatoes, a stock cubes, some lentils and a dash of worcestershire sauce - cheapest soup ever.

Thurso I am very happy that you picked your name from a map - Thurso is a fucking long way from anywhere, and it is bleak and cold. If you'd lived there then you really would have a good reason to feel depressed. (Sincere apologies to anyone who lives in thurso, and who loves it with a passion).

You made me laugh Venus, although maybe I should visit Thurso as perhaps it was spiritual intervention that day !!!

I'm feeling much better now, crikey this thing is evil

Actually, no, it's not the drink that's evil, it's the way that I choose to use it

Hi babes
a busy weekend here with lots of visitors - lots of cooking and LOTS of tussling with drink thoughts as everyone else tucked in. The last lot left this morning and -helpfully- left a half full bottle of red on the coffee table to greet me when I got home from work.

I have just poured it away and poured myself a juice, but boy that was painful and kind of added insult to injury IYSWIM. Anyway i survived and am now on day 27 - reckon I might start counting in weeks after tomorrow?

Afternoon!!

I'm very excited because I now have new shiney wooden flooring instead of the long overdue to be replaced carpet that was there this morning

Really want a drink but I am not going to have one as I have spent the weekend on the lash & still feel a bit rough.

mouse I know MN isn't a hugs & cuddles place so I am sending you a rugby tackle onto the sofa full of tickles instead.

Bloody well done BB, does it get easier?
Day 19 here, and as you can see, biggo crash.

[slinks onto the bus as I haven't managed to get to Day 1 yet, felt so optomistic earlier]

Wasindie - You are marvellous. Thank you for making a tired Mouse smile and LOL xxx

thurso - YOU are doing great, YOU are winning this battle. Every day that is a sober day is one up on the old bugger booze!!

Keep going, we are all willing you to succeed.

BB - well done to YOU!!!!

Thanks Sleep - where were you and your bag of magic sleepy dust for Nemo last night?

Off to cook and bath the small noisy one. Be back later.

I'm with you zanywany but there's only two glasses in the bottle and i won't be going out for more.
Well done BB - I'm so impressed!

Thurso, don't you feel that you have proved now that you can do it? As I always say, 'No magic'. Re the dc leaving. What you are feeling is entirely natural, not a prob related to alcohol. If you do have a drink, at any point, just don't go back to what you were doing. I drink occasionally but then just stop, because now I know that I can.

Hi there to Headless, algae.
Is Bicarb a namechange for Daddy from SA?

I love the fact that we can have a barney without anyone turning into a flouncer.

When, Mif, is your baby due? And a hello to Hubba, the now preg babe!!

Thanks again to JWN for starting this and for M and V for doing, for doing just what you too do.

Remember everyone. We are not powerless. The problems we face, (abusive partners, lack of money, children leaving home, etc) are normal human challenges. Not special for us. It is known in the latin as, 'humanus conditionus.

(JWN, could we hear anymore about your hypnotherapy?)

demented and zany it would be impossible for me to count the number of times that I have started the morning full of resolve, and barely got to lunchtime (and certainly not to tea time). So don't feel you will never get off the day 1 starting block. If you want to, then one day you will.

In the meantime it does sound as though you are generally drinking less, and you are certainly more conscious of your habits - what makes you want a drink, what approaches help to distract you. It will all stand you in good stead.

Sorry love I think the BT engineer must have hexed my last bag - sending lot's of sleeping dust Nemo's way for tonight & really hope he can settle better.

Got to go as I need to set my sky + planner with my friend so we watch exactly the same programmes tonight That is not as weird as it sounds btw x

venus, am in Delhi this week, maybe I could send good vibes out here for your DD!

just lost a long messgae Bah!
will try again, was saying to Thurso this weekend was bloody hard but I didn't want to admit defeat and felt proud of myself knowing that it was hard. I do feel rage when other people drink MY soft drinks though - nearly bit the arm of a friend that reached across me to get MY pelegrino the other evening , as Mouse would say Norty me! I am watching my water with almost as much intensity as I used to watch the level of my wine glass...

sarajen - bless you, that made me smile