No ejaculations and runs off in the morning

[Thomcat]

That's the crux of the problem.

My bestest, oldest, dearest friend has started seeing a guy, 38 yrs old, and has so far enjoyed about a month of his company.

However there seems to be a few problems.

1. When he stays over, which is alot, every weekend so far and during the week, he wakes up & opens his eyes and within 15 minutes he's out of the door saying he'll be back in an hur or so, and he is, but why the running off.

2. They have had sex a fair amount. Possibly not quite as much as they could/should be having in the first heady days of a relationship, but an ok amount. He gets an erection but so far, in over a month, he hasn't come. She has, that's all fine, but he hasn't.

We know he likes a beer, probably a bit too much.
QUESTION: If he gets an erection but doesn't ejaculate is that a drink related problem, or not?
QUESTION: What else could be causing the lack of ejaculation?
FACT : He gets an erection but it's not like he's just such a stud he can go for hours and not come. I think, from what I know, he gets one but it doesn't last for that long.

I'm not sure what else to tell you, so ask away and I'll do my best to answer / find out.

Any ideas about this ejaculation thing and also any ideas about what she should do about his running off every morning for an hour? Is that related to the sex thing do you think, is he leaving before she gets a chance to get saucy with him?

Off to make Lottie lunch, be back to see if any of you wise women have any clues.

TC x

turns into a pumpkin

in the morning???

OMG! You're all raving, stark raving.
How bloody funny. Well me and bf would never have come up with the poo scenario, not ever, ever! PMSL!

Okay so I'll take her your therories (crying laughing at telling her about goatman and all of them tbh!) and then come next weekend she can talk to him.

He's a really sweet guy, and I have a lot of time for him, but there is a possibility this is a drug/drink issue which would be sad. If it's anything other than a poo issue (PMSL again), then she's out of there, believe that.

I will of course now, with her full permission I'm sure, let you know what he says when confronted.

To answer a couple of questions, in case this gets semi-serious again at any point (!)

• He works for the post office, has something to do with sending out the delivery vans
• I don't think he could be a heroin addict becasue I'm sure that a mutual friend would know and have told me/her. A very good mate of mine has know him all her life and is best, best mates with his sister while also being very close to him herself. I think he might be described as a bit hedonistic, and I know he partakes in class a's sometimes, but I don't or didn't think to a very big extent, certainly not for it to mean he has to run home in the morning to take drugs. God I hope not, thta would be awful Let's hope there is a funny, and happy ending to this.

Thanks everyone, you've all been great as usual, and as funny and as crazy as ever, I love you all!

The bloke is a panda, .....eats shoots and leaves.

Except for the middle bit not being quite right!!

You all forgot runs off for a ................. run? He's practising for the marathon and no sex before a big game etc etc he thinks its ok as long as he doesnt actually cum?

thanks BGD, now I can go to bed happy!

I am a subscriber to the poo/methadone/socialist worker theory myself, but did wonder about religious maniac or cult member of some kind (guilt / self-denial re ejaculation and dawn rituals to attend) or some sort of co-counselling appointment each morning? Or one of those motivational vacuum-cleaner-selling cults where they all attend a morning session and gee each other up?
Or a more serious life-coaching co-counselling telephone call appointment?
He is a druid and rushes out to worship the sunrise?

he's obviously gay but in denial and he's catholic thats why he runs out in the morning - its guilt thing

Is there an issue with smoking here? i.e is she absolutely against smoking?

I know that when I was supposed to have given up smoking but secretly started again, I would have sold my soul for that morning fag.

I couldn't wait to get out the door - of course DH knew (what a plonker I am )

I thought that dejags, theres nothing like a dose of nicotine to make someone get up and out the door for a puff in the morning...cannot belive I was in bed thinking about this last night

Message withdrawn

ohh, what a mystery!

Does he ever poo in your friend's house at other times of the day? if so, less likely he is rushing off to poo in secret in the morning.

I think your friend should get someone to follow him one morning, to see where he goes.

If he is going home, perhaps he is having to make or receive a phone call from another woman -girlfriend alert! I had a male friend with a fiance living in France who always did this. I was their way of keeping tabs on each other.

I have to say, class A drugs/methadone do seem to be a likely cause of his not coming and morning leaving, though

ah, another thought. You say he works for the post office, something to do with sending out the delivery vans? could he be involved in some semi legal scam that demands his presence for an hour each morning?

Sorry, I seem to be casting all sorts of aspersions on your friend's boyfriend! hope none of my theories are true.

i would have followed him by now!!!!! call me cynical

Message withdrawn

yeah does she ever?,does she? can't wait any longer, tell us whats going on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes she has stayed there and he did have a beer first thing in the morning when she stayed there, but usually he stays there.
They went away to Brighton and he was fine in the mornings then, they went down for breakfast, came back to bed, had sex (he didn't come) and then went back to sleep before going out and having a lovely day together.

I'm going to forward her this thread so we'll see what she says.

You lot are so funny, i love how you're all so involved and intrigued, so glad I started this thread, I think!!!

but if he didn't do it when they went to Brighton, then it must be something connected with his home environment?
interesting work-related theory from tigermoth.

my only other thought in the night was, maybe he is Mr Rochester and has a mad wife in the attic..

This is a deffo brill thread

I hope it is something harmless rather than a drink/drugs/adulterous reason.

But in Brighton the big question is:

Did he poo in the morning???????????

How long did it take him?????

Was it before or after sex??????

this may help

Perhaps all that lovely sea air bunged up his bottom!

Has she thought about asking him where he goes?

Perhaps he wakes early because of his job and just doesnt want to disturb her
Perhaps he likes flossing in private
Does he need medication first thing?
Is it the only time he can call his stock broker?
Does he feel insecure and goes to check on his nasal hair?
Does he have a pet guinea pig he must attend to?

Failing this the poo theory works. I cant see the drink thing working. One shot/pint wouldn't be enough to carry you through the day. Check the shrubbery around her house for secreted whisky bottles just in case though.

Love bemused of bow