DH said there is no way we are having another child, I feel paralysed

[grapeandlemon]

Bit of background DH is considerably older than me by 20 yrs. I never felt the urge for another child after having DD due to PND and birth trauma.

For the first time this month I felt like I could do it again and want to do it again. V quickly. DD is 4 soon. I was happy only having one before this and DD is a v lovely sociable little girl, but something has clicked in me ( I am 32) and feel v strong now.
Only thing is DH says he is too old. He has 3 other children from a previous marriage and says he has had his children and can't work and support another child for the long term. Which I know is reasonable .

I don't suppose there are any answers. I almost feel like splitting up with him but I know that is v unfair and I couldn't just grab another man to breed with, that's not the way it works I want a child with him as I love him.

I hate myself for not considering this with an older man but he just seems and looks so young and healthy. He explained that he can't work forever I know he is right there is just no way around it.

Just getting it out I know there are no answers just wanted some support

I'm an only child, it's great. More presents, more food, no fights with siblings, less rows over what to watch on TV...no one to steal my monkey suit.

I mean my old monkey suit not the one i don't have downstairs.

Arf at coolfonz

swallowedafly, I am sorry if those of you who have only children have had your feeling hurt or feel abused in some way by this part of the conversation. I don't think anyone intended that. IIRC there is a great thread celebrating all the terrific things of having an only child and the OP may want to take a look at that.