Fab & Glam 11 - A New Chapter

[Tanee58]

I figure that the reason I haven't been able to post all day, is because we've run out of thread - again!! Hope you all find this, my fellow Teabags. Are contenders for the longest-running MN thread?

Anyhoo, TFM, I have a tent, and an inflatable mattress. And I quite fancy a trip oop north!

Totally agree with Ginnny - great start Tanee

Thanks Lush & Ginnny, have a great weekend. I've just spent the whole afternoon using DD's laptop to do my Christmas shopping. Thank god for Amazon!

You have a great one too We're doing our xmas shop on Monday. Can't wait to get it all done. I loathe last min xmas shopping. Can't do crowds anymore. I'm too old.

So sorry to butt in like this but just wanted to tell Ginny that when her ex goes to court she can ask that a restraining order is sought. Breach of the order carries a maximum penalty of 5 years and hopefully may act as a deterrent .

Hope this helps and because it is part of the criminal proceedings it will not cost a penny .

Great advice radio

Thank you radio! That is really helpful.
I must admit I have been worried about what will.happen after the court case when there are no bail conditions anymore.
He's disappeared now. I haven't seen him since it happened but as his house is so close to mine its just a matter of time before he pops up again andvi want to be prepared.

Sorry for typos. Using my phone.

I am glad I was able to help. The restraining order can be made whether he is convicted or acquitted- just contact the officer dealing with the case and ask him to complete an MG13 form so the application is made.

Thank you so much radio. I phoned police and Monday is just for him to plead and if he pleads not guilty the bail conditions still stand till it goes to court.

Either way we will get a restraining order on him.
PHEW - Big sigh of relief

Good Ginnny, glad to hear it. That must be such a relief. Let us know how it goes on Monday.

All well here. Second counselling session was good, she got DP to talk about his father - the root of his probs. He's willing to carry on with the sessions - realises it's the only hope for us - and he hasn't gone into a massive decline the way he did when we did Relate. In fact, it's as if releasing his negative thoughts is bringing back a bit of the old, lovely DP. So am feeling more optimistic than I have in over a year!

And I have a new laptop. Hoorah!

Great news Tannee! It's about time after all you've been through.

Oh and good news about dp as well of course

Annie - !

Hi Ginnny, how are you? Any news on Swampy?

Hi Tannee - I see you read the other thread
I still don't know what happened in court. The police keep saying their system hasn't been updated and the CID man I deal with is never there to take my call.

I saw him yesterday. He tried to catch my eye but I ignored him and walked past. I actually feel nothing for him now, which in a way is good, but also quite disturbing, I'm starting to wonder if I ever really loved him, or at least how long I kidded myself that I did, because its not like me to be able to 'switch off' like this.

Anyway, things with new DP are going so well. He is absolutely gorgeous!!!!!

Hi Ginnny, yes, I saw the other thread - it's one that I watch from time to time. I thought 'Swampy' was a great name!

Glad he's at least not trying to accost you. I would think that your love for him had been draining away for quite some time - and now, you can face the fact that there's nothing left. He doesn't deserve any affection from you. Still, I know what you mean - I was the same with my stalker BF years ago - when I finally got rid, it was such a huge relief, I wondered why I'd been so desperate to keep him for so many years, and realised that, actually, I felt nothing for him any more, and again, had not done for some time. It was just that he had become a habit - or a 'project', as someone I know describes her relationships, where she's tried to 'fix' someone.

All well here. DP and I had our third session with the counsellor, and talked about Christmas and my feelings about not being able to have DD home until DP's gone to his mother's. DP said he felt sad that he was making me so unhappy, and thanks to talking it over with the counsellor, was finally beginning to see that there might be a way to deal with his irrational negative feelings towards DD, and eventually, hopefully, to make amends to her. Small steps, but this time last year, he couldn't make any steps at all.

That's really good Tanee :-) Seems as if the counselling is genuinely helping.

Is everyone set for xmas?

Thats good Tannee!! Small steps - and its good that he is dealing with his issues regarding DD too.
Swampy has reached an all time low. He has trashed DP's truck again. Called police, they took bits off to test for DNA but nobody saw so he'll probably get away with it. He's a shit. I hate him.
He pleaded not guilty in court so we have to both give evidence in February. I hope they send him down.

Hi Lush - All ready for Christmas and credit card maxed out!! I'll be paying for it till at least June next year!!
Ho Hum!!!

Hi Lush, well, I've done all my shopping - thanks to Amazon - just waiting for the packages to arrive. I'm certainly looking forward to Christmas much more than last year - when I just wanted it all to go away. Am hoping that this time next year, DD will be home again (unless she's gone to college in Dundee, as she's considering!)

Ginnny - he doesn't learn, does he. Was probably too drunk to care. Hope he gets sent down.

How are everyone else? Most of the Teabags seem to have gone to ground.

/wave

(a) been working (shock to the system) and (b) my Warcraft expansion finally arrived, so not so much MN'ing the last few days!

warcraft

Ginnny - sorry to hear he is still being an a-hole. Shame you couldn't get proof it was him that trashed dp's truck.

Hi HW. What's Warcraft? (feeling glad I don't have to buy boy toys !

Had a 'fun' session w counsellor tonight, talking about ME for a change, and all my own hangups. Told her about my near incest experience with my father, made me a bit shaky. DP's almost the only other person I've ever told, and it made me shaky! My own personal 'blame the parent's session! Counsellor said I have an uncanny knack for seeing the good and the bad in people, which is my survival tactic. DP says he's feeling much more calm since we started therapy, and HOPEFUL! Thinks he can cope with DD staying next week, and the counsellor and I both suggested he try just saying hallo to her, then pushing off if he wants to do his own thing elsewhere. We agreed he'd feel so much better if he could make that initial breach in the wall. I'm liking this counsellor. She says we seem to have a good thing going for us, we have an obvious love for each other and we share a sense of humour, but we need to learn to feel unafraid of saying what's on our minds. And she's so right! It's almost (but not quite) as good as talking to TFM.

TFM, where are you...?

Tanee this is bloody brilliant You and dp have managed to find the perfect counsellor for you. Well done

Hope you are all OK and looking forward to Christmas.
I'm doing good. Haven't been able to see DP much over the last week because he has had his dc and his parents staying and he has been snowed in too, but I have missed him so much its made me realise how strongly my feelings are for him. Luckily, he says he feels the same so when his dc go home on Xmas Day we are spending the week until New Year together.
I have a good feeling that 2011 will be the year when we all get what we want!

Ginnny, that's great news - looks like NM could be The One1

I've just had an anxious time getting DP to the station - as usual he overslept & I had to wake him up - I am praying he caught his train to Wales (was hoping there'd be delays, but they were running on time) & that I don't find him back here in an hour! I don't fancy him being here over Christmas as DD's here too and although things went calmly yesterday, and they managed a civil 'hallo' to each other, they didn't spend time together - and I can't stand the thought of shuffling between them for the next three days and leaving DP on his own tomorrow!

It was so nice spending the evening with DD - we watched non-stop Peep Show and gossiped.

Hope everyone has a fabulous Christmas, and look forward to a great New Year. Onwards and Upwards, Teabags!