ALL NEW Road to Recovery for the Recently Ditched No. 6

[gettingeasier]

Cant survive 5 minutes without this thread

Any effects from the reheated Chinese, beebers? I do it all the time but my gut is made of cast iron. I don't like this babyshower business either. I end up buying another present when the baby is born. I mean, you can't go emptyhanded when you go to munch the new bubba, can you? It's a big fat swizz in my books.

Just finished reading Salinger's The Catcher in the Rye.Probably apt that it has taken me til this stage in my life to read it.I think my H sees me as the catcher TBH but in the end maturity means you have to be your own catcher.
AB as Holden Caulfield would say ur pub last nite was full of "phoneys"Just be yourself you dont need to try hard ,sure get some clothes that you like but always do it for you ,not some sleaze.Confidence is the most attractive thing you can wear IMO.So many insecure folk out there thinking they need to look some way or act some way and get out of their heads drunk just to have a good time cos hedonism rocks man...well does it really ,i think you reep what you sow?
H arrived late and said he wouldnt have kids out long so would i be in when he got backthen another family arrived to view house,so I finished reading my book...ROCK N'ROLL !

Ok more candling research done and i think im ready to place my first order

i ate it am not dead just reheated the sweet and sour chicken and the noodles.

send us the link armbow and i will let you know. i am impressed by the use of the word capsule personally.

baby shower was ok, realised i had no wrapping paper or card (how can you buy a card for a baby that is not here yet), so bunged in a bit of paper ripped out of a note pad. my friend laughed in a 'oh isn't she funny way' so I said yes, well its hard being a single mother of three and every one promptly shut up.

armbow i really rely on my tax credits if i did not have them i would literally be on the breadline am hoping no changes are going to be made as my salary is truly pittance.

hope all dumplings are well.

kisses to you all.

I love that book SO much Patience. Only the other was thinking of changing my MN name to HoldenCaulfield.

Armbow, I'm sure you didn't stand out like a sore thumb at all........your vivid description sounds really horrid.....all those yucky slappers and sleazy men.......what's it all coming to ?

I think it's such a shame our DC are groing up in this promiscuous time rather than the much more innocent time I grew up in.

I got really cross this afternoon just thinking about it Smartie TBH never read a NUTS magazine in my life but I cannot help but be appauled at this whole culture and how degrading to women it is and how we accept it and put up with it to keep our man.My X certainly had his head turned with all this and i am only just starting to understand it .Really sad for my kids .All ended very badly today ,cant say much but truly awful ,will have to see SOL as soon as.
But these people have no integrity ,they are indeed all"PHONEY"

I think the sexist attitude was there b4 just became more apparent when we had kids but def encouraged and accepted by blokes he socialised with.Anyway i was right re the victim part of the cycle today ,this will either go to nice bloke {i think we might miss that bit this time}or straight to bad bastard ....only time will tell.

Waves to all.......

Back to dumpling villa tomorrow. Havent had a chance to get fully up to speed on thread but really sorry to hear things are going so hard for Happy & Patience. It's a fu*kup when trying to deal with stressful emotional stuff. Sending you both vertual hugs & hope things calm down for you both soon. Btw Happy think Pinks post of 23.43 y´day says it all really regarding your xh. Hang in there dumplings, this too shall pass.

Hi all, nice to see plenty of chat

Lovely evening out with friend tonight

Sad you've had a horrid time today, Patience, it will pass and there will be more and more good times to come, I just know it

Looking forward to hearing full holiday reports from Getting and Starting. >

Also looking forward to seeing some good style pics. Beebers, Armbow, get posting.

Armbow, good news (I think...) on the house also - I'm sure a fresh start in a new home will be wonderful

Pink, Starting and everyone else, thanks for all of the moral support and kind words. I'm sure things will get better here. I do have lots of good times, a shame though that there is plenty of crap alongside that.

Tea, Chair, where are you?

Going to tai chi this week,just need to find premises for business idea then i can get started ,met bus advisor this morning and he has signed me up for lots of courses.So onwards and upwards !
Hope holiday was fab Startin'
Hope you got back ok after ur long drive Gettin'
Waves to everyone x

Ah Patience, You mean business advisor, don't you? I honestly read that as bus, thinking you were going to become a bus driver or run a fleet of coaches .

I've had a productive but sad day. Went into bank to change joint accounts to my name only and started doing some number crunching for XP to mull over. He couldn't believe how much he owed me! But I've got it in black and white so he can't really argue. He volunteered all his cards that we have to joint accounts without being asked - there's just no fight in him at all and that is the sad bit.

Mind you, having looked at the figures and thought about how badly he has treated me I honestly don't know if I'd take him back even if he begged on his knees. Basically, he was out shagging OW while I was holding things together at home and having more than my fair share of other problems at the same time. Still love him (a bit) but fast losing any respect.

hello all

h is upstairs bathing dcs i am trying to look busy and fabulous downstairs tax credits have lost my claim so could be another 3 weeks until i get any money

despite this i am still upbeat and plugging away at de-tangling myself from h and getting on with new life.

decided to change my name, thinking of going for a double barrel surname so that i get maiden name back but keep married name at end for the kids.

will read rest of thread later -thinking of having a indulgent evening tucked up on bed with lots of pillows and MN !!!!!

Hello Dumplings

first thankyou all for all your encouragement and praise you have all given me over the last week or so its been a lifeline .

Well we got home fine and I am feeling really chuffed that I have given the dc a fab week and spent a lot of time way out of my comfort zone and come out smiling. I feel very different from the dumpling who posted last saturday pleading for support sobbing about exh and ow . How much do I want to be feeling like this more and more , my confidence feels sky high and I think I found a big chunk of the old getting

Also having established the only time I need a man is if I am in a large canoe and in day to day life I'm usually on land I am ok on my own.

Happy I think I have kind of covered my holiday posting most days. Suffice to say it exceeded all our expectations for what didnt sound that amazing a holiday. But a wonderful side effect has been feeling hugely boosted and empowered and that I have almost stepped out of the long shadow cast by exh and the humiliations of our marriage.

Just as well I am feeling good as he picks up dcs tomorrow for 12 days but I think I am going to be fine . I have lots of plans and I am pretty exhausted so a break will be nice I just hope the dc have fun as his plans sound sketchy and heavily reliant on his parents to do the entertaining - no surprises

Anyway I am meant to be watching Surfs Up with dc ..so see you later

Hooray for getting. You did good girl but then we never expected anything less .

Hello my fellow Dumplings....

Hope things are brighter for everyone today.

Well holl was a great success & I am so aware & grateful for how lucky I am to have been able to bring dc's on holls again this yr. Just relaxed with dc's & had lots of fun. By night when dc's were asleep spent a lot of time reflecting on xh & stuff. This time last yr I had brought dc's to same place on holl & was waiting for xh to be removed from house so I guess it brought back a lot of memories. This past yr has been one of great emotional pain, loss & grief but equally I have had great joy with dc's & have managed to always maintain a v happy home regardless of stuff with xh.

I think I may have reached another turning point in recovery. I think a part of me spent a long time last yr waiting for the man who professed to adore me to return & fight for his marriage & dc's. I realise now xh's words & actions didn't match. I found it v hard to accept that someone I loved & had 3 dc's with could treat me with such hatred, anger & contempt and that he would refuse to work with me to sort access for dc's. Now I just want to get on with my life & do the best I can for me & dc's.

My solicitor has organised family therapy as a last resort. Tbh even though I've been pushing for this for a long time now, at this stage I don't hold out too much hope. It would prob be easier if xh was gone from dc's lives but this is the way it is & I will just continue to keep my side of the street clean & do the best I can for dc's.

While I was away I got a call offering me a college place. It's for the same course but with a different college. It will mean repeating last year but the course times should be manageable with dc's. There is also the disadvantage that there is only a 50% chance of being offered a place the following year & in fact I was going to turn down the offer over this but I've now more or less decided to give it a shot. There were over 150 people applied for 60 places & of those 60 only 24 will eventually make it to degree level. I could waste another two years & still not get a qualification but I have decided I am a dumpling & there is no way I will not eventually be one of the 24 to qualify.

I will read back the thread later & try to get properly up to date on what's going on for everyone atm.

LC.......there might not be any fight in H at the moment but believe me his fight will resume so don't let your guard down.

When my EH left, I momentarily felt sorry for him as he seemed a bit sad and pathetic. It didn't last long though and he fought me good and hard and nasty and got what he wanted in the end. Their (his) lack of integrity knew no bounds.

Getting.........that's such a wonderful post ! Think you should frame it.

Bloody well done, I think that's so fantastic. I can only dream of being as independent as you. Sa we're a little colective, I'm going to take and own a tiny bit of your elation to have for myself if that's ok. I'm inspired.

Glad you gave yourself and your DC a good time away Starting, even though it was tinged with sad memories. That must have been hard. Brilliant that you've been offered a colege place, lots of opportunities to meet some talent.

Love to everyone else

As...not sa

oh my christ there is a spider the size of a human hand in my front room, i heard it clod hopping over the wooden floor. am hiding in bedroom. being single is shit at times like these.

Hi all
Beebers, you do need a token male at a time like this. Chin up tits out and grab one off the street?
Seriously there's not a lot we need then for tho is there?

i live in a quiet road. the neighbours already think i am nuts enough as it is. if i ran out there now stark naked (am in bed) they may have me committed.

anyway have my date tomorrow dumplings.

unfortunately a waspie stung me on the boob at the weekend so will not be getting those out as looks like i have some mad boil on there.

looking good.

Beebers.......when DH left I did a spider phobia course.

It was quite good.........haven't seen a spider since ! Honestly.

They said that spiders seem to run towards you but are actually running away from the telly.

Anyway, if you want to distract yourself there's a thread on here about privacy and human rights which has got me wound up like a spring

yes i read it what a prick, i can only assume that is a man saying all that. i couldn't even bring myself to comment.

lol at bus driver lc
I live in the country BB so that sounds like a baby one to me
Big hugs you will be fine
Good to see you back Startin good you had a nice break x