Archers - who wants to kill Helen?

[seeker]

Form an orderly queue...........

Trouble is I get them all mixed up.

David's wife - Good Lord that woman needs a kick up the arse.

All though the affair storyline. Jeez I never, ever thought I would be on the side of the cheating arse bloke but she was so hidious I couldnt help it.

Martyrdom - if was ever made an Olympic event she would get Gold Silve and Bronze.

Do you really think Annette will blurt? I think it will be Leon who does the deed. And then H will slaughter both and Pat will convince Tony best thing to do is hide bodies in Bridge Farm freezer and Clarrie will have to be let in on the secret but will be nice about it. She will tell no one but Eddie, Jo, Nicki, Emma and William and of course Ed because it's not fair to tell W and miss him out. The whole problem will eventually be solved by Tom and his sausages.(Which will be flogged off at festivals by Baggy and Snatch, and eaten, alas, by many of the younger generation including Pip.

Oooh...difficult choice between whether it should be Helen or Shula first up against the wall I reckon. They're both soooo irritating, but I think I dsilike Shula just a little bit more.

Quite like Ruth, though, although the way she says Piiiiip and Daaaviiiiiid is a bit grating.

)

Ha
Older man
I knew it

LOL at David's outrage and hypocrisy

Barbarian, as a listener of some 30 years it was only when I saw Baggy and Snatch written down that I realised how rude is is!

Sorry nothing to do with discussion, I just spurtled my evening sherry on the screen.

Our tv guide keeps referring to Mike as the 'One Eyed Milkman' which makes me chortle (in a dignified R4 sort of way)

i don't listen anymore but i used to have a fantasy archers script

'daniel don't go near the open well... daniel....!'
'splash'

Sorry but you are all wrong.

Will is the most irritating person in the Archers.

Oh Shula first definately. No wonder Alistair periodically slides off the rails. Who wouldn't living with St Shula.

Pat winds me up too. And Peggy. And Jill.

Oh all of them!

Helen is the worst for me; I can handle Shula. She's set in her ways, but she isn't so infuriatingly controlling like Helen.

How is Helen supposed to be Pat and Tony's child? Tony is curmodgenly, but otherwise straightforward. Pat is totally sensible and straightforward, so where did get Helen get her near-OCD personality from?

Susan needs taking out with a shotgun! Brenda's next.

I have a soft spot for Vicki though

Very impressed with your plot predicting skills HerBeatitude.

Do you really think Annette will blab? I was thinking yesterday maybe she'd just shove off to her gran's and that'd be the end of it. Then I remembered, durrrrr it's a soap! Of course that won't happen.

Susan is awful but in a love-to-hate-her kind of way. Helen, sanctimonious Shula and Pip just make me want to turn the radio off. (Or throw it on the floor and stamp on it.)

Susan was always bonkers. Remember when she Did Time for harbouring her nasty fugitive brother? Or am I the oldest Archers fan here?

Have you noticed ALL the women under 60 are barmy? The only Archers template for well-balanced Womanhood is post-Menopausal stiff-upper-lip stalwart of the WI and Parish Council.

Am still totally addicted though! .

Herbeatitude and zisforzebra both got it right about the annoying Pip's boyfriend, so points awarded to both of you!

But agree with MrsFlit: "Susan was always bonkers."

Also agree with chegirl:

"They all whine like blocked hoovers. I have been listening for years and am also addicted but feck they are annoying."

Anyone else noticed that graffiti around the village has been commented on a couple of times recently? Leaving me to wonder if one of the little horrors such as Jamie/Josh will be Found Out for it?

I was glued to the radio this evening and I turned around and there was DH lurking just out of sight but still in earshot listening to what the deal was with Pip and Beemer Jude. LOL

Laughing about your DH moodlum. My 2yo DS has a special "Archers dance" that he does whenever he hears the music.

Yes PrincessFiorimonde have noticed the graffiti thing as well. Briefly hoped it might be Helen going off the rails after not being able to 'Be There' enough for Anette, but fear I am only dreaming...

Why is Annette lumbering herself onto Helen, is Annette just a user? Doesn't Annette have a sister and a mum (and a step-dad) back in France? Why didn't she run home to them for support rather than deal with all this abortion stuff with Helen as her only confidante?

(I am obviously not meant to follow soaps, I spend all my time poking holes in the plots!)

Arrgh.

Closing line: Helen says "something terribly sad has happened"

It's not Annette is it. Did you hear the emergency siren behind Moike and Jazzer? It's Phil isn't it?

Oh dear I missed tonight's episode!

I do hate it when they do this - anyone else remember when John Archer got squashed under his tractor?

DS was a baby, I was a SAHM, Radio 4 was my only intellectual stimulation and I got addicted to the Archers. I was still v. hormonal and cried for days...

MrsF I reckon that is when I last listened to the Archers! I used to listen to R4 all the time and got utterly sick of John Peel's 'Home Truths' prog on Saturday mornings so I turned off R4 permanently. I recognise most of the characters listed. Surely the most irritating person on the Archers was Linda? Is she still there?

you got sick??

of Home Truths?

It was the dull stories and the frequent repetition of all the programme contact details - "If you'd like to tell us about your acrobatic hamster call 0800 800 500 765 992 000000 or text us 855537865749999999 or email us on bbc home truths dot co dot uk forward slash home truths make sure it is a forward slash not a backward slash" every five minutes. Truly the most tedious programme on radio. Maybe it improved but I did stick it out for a couple of years before I realised that anything was better than that .

Joins Springheeledjack in graceful swoon....

Home Truths with John Peel was the only way I could face Saturday mornings with ex-DP lying in a hungover coma.

hahahaaaaaaa, you're right- I never actually listened to it as the kids always made too much noise whilst it was on. tho like most of R4 I found it provided a comforting constant gentle burble

you know what, though- I find if anyone says anything slightly off about Peelie, (not on here, but in RL) they get the