Quelle surprise! Rob hasn't FOTTFSOF and is in fact hiding in the bushes at Henwee's school. Discuss the latest unlikely Archers events here.

[PseudoBadger]

What do we want?
Realistic storylines!
When do we want them?
As soon as the writers see this!

What age is Lillian? It is odd, the reaction to the affair. They have made no attempt to keep it secret, the whole village knows. You would have thought Justin would be better at infidelity with his history.

I imagine Lilian to be 50s but I've no idea actually

Surely Lilian is older than 50s?

Yes Bertrand She must be 70 or approaching it.

Delurking and going completely off tangent for a sec.

My grandma remembers listening to the archers when Shula was born! Apparently Jill and Phil threw some alphabet blocks in the air to come up with her name?!

I quite like J & L storyline, but would like it more if Miranda turned out to be quite nice and L felt guilty and ended things. I also don't like that J & L have colluded to cover up Stefan's revelation.

I think Rob is planning to kill Helen and leg it with Jack. I'm not sure he's planning to kill himself in the process, more that he's accepting he's going to end up in prison.

Jack's around 8 months old, isn't he? Can't be bothered to go back and check precisely.

Lillian was born 8 July 1947, so she'll be 70 in five months time.

I thank you Puremince

And jack born 21st May so ~8 months is right.

I seem to remember Miranda saying something which implied Justin had previous but with younger women, so at the time (well before the panto) she didn't have any suspicions about Lil.

70!! And Jack only 8mo? My radio age radar is well off!

And yeah ... Whichever SW thinks six year old Henry can keep a secret ...

But its not a secret, oh no. Secrets are bad, like when mummy tried to take you on the train and made daddy sad. This is a nice surprise, you don't want to spoil it? evil two-faced manipulative...

Hoping henwee nevertheless will give the game away. Maybe the surprise is a lovely new coat for jack which rob wants to dress him in before Helen sees it?

Abused children can be very good at keeping secrets.......

Not religious and in actual real life - affairs= a Very Bad Idea.

In theatre however... take a look at Shakespeare, the ancient Greeks, Moliere, and any comedy/tragedy you'd care to name and you'll find shenanigans, questionable morals, and the twisting of ones emotions to back the 'wrong' person.

Yes when Miranda met Lilian she said something along the lines of thank goodness she was older than the last PA, because we don't want a repeat of last time, do we Justin? Miranda clearly not happy at Justin's philandering ways, and he's clearly got form.

Think is shows Justin can be pretty ruthless really and won't give a thought to screwing Lilian or Ambridge as a whole over if it suits his purposes. This was his logic I hiring Rob, that he didn't want someone to cozy with the locals.

Absolutely, Bertrand. They can.

And Henry did let the cat out of the bag about the nasty, take them at 5 boarding school, so might well remember how upset Mummy was by him telling her something Daddy had told him not to.

Oh yes, the boarding school was also supposed to be a 'surprise' that we weren't telling mummy yet, wasn't it.

I hope that Rob will be stopped in some way by a speeding Lily and the pothole by Bridge Farm.

Gaspo! I am nearly as old as you and far from being written off, I am AWESOME and in much better nick than I was in my twenties. Last night at yoga I achieved the Bakuasana , ha! (I realise ego and competitiveness is not very yogic, but since I spent part of the class falling out of a balance, I'm going to grab what I can) and my upper arms are going to look epic in the Vivienne Westwood dress I've got hanging in my armoire. I don't like the longsightedness that has come with age, but apart from that, it's all good. I was rubbish at being young. Middle age is fab, and I expect old age (health willing) to be good too. And to be honest, I was probably patronised more in my youth than today, although obviously there are always people who think it fine to call you 'dear' or 'darling'.

Totally pissed off about the Rob storyline.

If I was in that type of relationship this story would not encourage me to get help. What a nightmare.

I still think suicide must be somewhere in Rob's plans, because he has nothing left to him. I just can't bear the thought that the scriptwriters have a family annihilation scenario in store. I'm sure Helen is going to intercept and Tom/Johnny will come riding to the rescue. And we will have a properly cathartic scene where Tom does what he should have done 18 months ago and lamps Rob...

Cromwell - perhaps you should channel Lil and get in with the 'darling' to all and sundry first?

Good idea, Errol - not sure I can pull off that degree of camp, though! As I grow increasingly forgetful on names, it might be an inevitability.

maybe I'm scared from when guys at Uni hang a speaker outside my window and played pornography into my room?

Fucking hell mummytime, that's disgusting. If my lad had done that at uni he'd have got the full on Hairdryer.

Abused children can be very good at keeping secrets...

Troofact. One of the many reasons my xw divorced me was that I never talked about my childhood. I still try to avoid the subject.

There's a storm brewing. Henry is going to out & about in it. Bodes badly, after all, we all know that Rob doesn't manage storms very well.

I am sorry D2. That is so desperately sad.

They are setting the scene for a thoroughly deserted Bridge Farm, aren't they?