Game of Farms: The 4 Houses of Ambridge. Bleak House, Boring House, Sitcom House and About to Breach the Terms of Their Tenancy House.

[PseudoBadger]

Never mind the yoghurt - who is making the Sterling Gold?!

Now we know Carol and Ursula know about each other, I'm really hoping for a (about 4 mins in)

Sorry more like (that other video has been buggered around with)

Wayne has always been a baker. He and Jolene attempted to make a living as musicians and weren't very successful.

Witch's Duel, surely?

Vita Perfectly acceptable to be a baker and a musician , bakers have to be up early so if you haven't been to bed at all, it would be easier.

Our local pizza man (this is in France) is very popular, dh wanted to see why and waited in the queue outside to be greeted by said baker with a fag in his mouth, the ash about to fall into the dough . Delicious tobacco pizzas .

I didn't think Wayne went to jail for the Loxfest dealing, didn't he just get a fine and community service or something?

I wonder how Elizabeth feels about going for a pub lunch cooked by the man who sold drugs to her teenage son?

I think he's been in jail before

I'm sure that pesky little drug dealing will be forgotten

It's funny isn't it, how we've been speculating for months and months about his relationship with his family, and with Jess, trying to work it all out. But now it's playing out with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer, we really don't fucking care! I was spitting feathers at that phonecall. Badly Done indeed!

Also agree with PPs about the Valentines cards - grow the fuck up!

This is Songbird by the way, I was fed up of that name after god knows how many years. This one suits me better. It makes me sweary

So.... Let's have some titles please

Another vote for BYOS dear Keri, we don't fucking care

I'll never be able to top my 'soak Ambridge to the core'

Mulling over something about replacing a lost SOC but can't find a way of tying it to KD's endless bloody tweets ...

Can you do anything with:

SOC's a quitter, Keri's on Twitter, and we're still bitter - how many more character transplants?

I like that DDD

Ooh yes. Bonus points for rhyming.

Oh dear - I'm afraid the first suggestion that came to mind to complete DDD's rhyme was "can the Archers get much shitter?"

Not happy that KD is promising that we're going to see more of Knob and Arseula's "complicated relationship" "as things progress." That strongly suggests that the whole improbable mother/son scenario is going to be dragged out for at least another few weeks when, as people rightly say, we really don't care.

So is it likely that SOC has washed his hands of the whole thing (and the SWs are running smock, making it up as they go along) or has he planned a grand, head spinning, patio distressing finale to his Ambridge tenure?

(they're not running smock...)

Right I've got the title thank you!

Something about spring calvers would be nice for the title (and a sort of ref to Helen too)

I hope "can the Archers get much shitter?" is in there pseudo

I'm not happy either, or interested in their relationship - I wish Ursula would just bugger off again.

Feedback on Twitter, FB etc seems overwhelmingly negative - everyone in agreement that they've ballsed it up.

I'm another who currently finds this thread more interesting (and funny although that isn't hard) than the programme that I've largely given up on.

Likewise. The whole Ursula is a snake in the grass thing is complete bollocks. It's like a child thinking oooh, got a reaction with that, so I shall do it again. And again. And again. All the while not realising that its audience is gritting its teeth.

I feel like Mr Bennett: "Ursula, you have delighted us long enough. Now shut the piano and feck off."