Gruach - that's one solution. But maybe instead we need to realise that while each of us feels weak and alone as we sit there at 7:02 hearing the CA say "And now Rob's got a surprise for Helen", TOGETHER WE CAN BE STRONG!
Come on everyone, let's hold hands, get closer, that's it, no need to fear, you're among friends, yes, you too lurkers at the back, we know you're there.
Let's be strong together, Rob cannot break us, the eternal bond of the MN Archers thread binds us. Let's do this for the real Helens, the ones even now thinking of posting on MN, "my DH has told me to stop working and arranged for his mother to come and stay for a week, telling me with two days' notice. What should I do?" Let's be strong for them.
You cannot crush our spirit, Rob, or Keri, or Sean or whatever your true name is! The Archers was here before you, the listeners have been here from the beginning - they are the golden chain of light that reveals character inconsistencies and storyline flaws. So, you scriptwriters and editors, The Archers will be here when you have gone, bringing its proud dishevelled band of listeners with it, in its bright wake. At the final reckoning, you cannot prevail, for together, we are strong.