Tis the season to be jolly, Fallon, Alan, Helen, Lillian; Deck the Hall with boughs of Holly, Lily, Will and Jill, Tilly Button. Celebrate Christmas with The Archers!

[PseudoBadger]

Thanks to SmallLegsOrSmallEggs for this thread title way back in November!

Yes, back then she was in confict with Pat'n'Tone who disapproved of her relationship with Rob. I thought him giving her a necklace might have jangled a chord for Pat tonight as she was deceived by both of them over a necklace at the time.

Yes. I hate it when Helen lies - I feel all conflicted. And she has been vile to her parents - I can't quite remember but didn't she move in with Rob partly to punish Pat by taking Henry away?

I've never found Hellbent a sympathetic character - still not forgiven her for her treatment of Hayley after John died, but I am hating Rob more than her! I'm not sure I agree about Pat seeing something wrong now, I'm not quite sure how aware Hellbent herself is of what Rob is doing to her. It is horribly well scripted.
Kuriusoranj, thank you very much for delurking and giving us your own perspective, particularly about the difference between the physical and emotional aspects of the abuse. I have a few questions I would like to ask you, in relation to Helen and Rob, but don't want to as I don't want to stir things up any more for you.

Kuriusoranj, welcome to the thread and thanks for sharing your experience with us. This SL must stir up some painful memories for a lot people.

Gruach is (of course) right about Blossom Hill Cottage. Odd that Usha as the landlord is not worried about one of her tenants losing his well-paid job and not getting a new one. I doubt she would think a short-term, part-time jobshare working behind the till at the farm shop is a good replacement for a full-time, permanent, well-paid managerial job.

Rob was utterly awful yesterday. He also badmouthed Anya, so that's another friendly person in Helen's life out of the window.

I hope the following doesn't trigger any bad memories for anyone. I've tried to word it sensitively but am feeling my way here.

Re the physical abuse we believe Helen has suffered - we know something happened which upset her very deeply but apart from her first exclamation of surprise/apprehension it was all off air. As far as I can tell, he's never hit her or anything else which is indisputably motivated by anger/hate/desire to hurt or intimidate her, and nothing else. If Helen ever mentions the sexual assault to anyone I would expect Rob to counter by saying it was rough sex and he might have got a bit carried away, for which he's sorry, but it was all consensual. He did more or less say that to her the following day, didn't he?

Kuriusoranj thanks for delurking . I had forgotten Blossom Hill was Usha's cottage. How much do we think the rent is? I can't see how Knob and Helen will be able to survive on what she earns - because that's effectively what a job share means. Especially if they are also talking about paying someone else to work in the shop - that's how Knob ran Ambridge Organics into the ground in the first place. Why hasn't anyone noticed? Hated the way he made Helen announce the job share as if it had been her idea. Kuriusoranj reading your post I'm thinking Helen needs someone who has also been in an a abusive relationship (Elizabeth? Or Debbie back from Hungary?) to help her see the light.

Just caught up, and Rob's stopping H from being with Henry when he opened his pressies was heartbreaking. Sounds like he didn't lift a finger to help wrap them either.

"we must do what Daddy says"- as observed up thread, chilling.

I also noticed him start to badmouth Pat and Tony re giving the selection box.

Come ON Tom, open your eyes! I wonder if Kirsty will decide that the best way to help H is to express her worries to Tom and that will be the catalyst for a rapprochement as they join forces to defeat him? I don't mean a renewed romance, just them being able to be in each other's company again.

I'm wondering if the finances ( or lack of) are going to start to rear their ugly head soon after the comment by Helen about expensive necklace Rob got her. Rather than gushabout such a gorgeous present she was more 'raised eyebrow' about how much it must have cost.
Wonder how she managed to get anything and what she got for Knob, what with not being allowed any money..

Maybe Usha is going to soon 'have a quiet word' with Helen about the standing order that hasn't come in this month?

I just can't see how Helen will be allowed to go on the spa day with Kirsty, he has stopped H doing anything else, why would he let her spend a whole day with a friend he doesn't approve of?

Yes agree EA is a gradual process, and very effective at destroying the victims confidence and self belief. I've seen it begin to happen to a friend before she got out at the stage where he was was starting to try and trap her with ideas of houses and babies. Her confidence plummeted and she lost far too much weight. Thankfully she is in a much better place now.

Was it finances that prompted Rob's anger over Helen arranging for her mother to stand in at the shop? I'm certain Rob is defrauding Ambridge Organics and probably doesn't want any of the family unexpectedly overseeing the accounts.

I think it was just the fact that Helen had made a decision without consulting him, which made him look stupid in front of Tom.

And really hoping Henry will let slip to Pat and Tony that mummy didn't open presents with him, surely they couldn't ignore that! However tired you were, your husband would wake you up for that or at least explain to child they need to wait a bit until mummy is awake. Really felt sorry for Helen on that one

She's actively lying about her eating now as well isn't she?

Lying about what you eat is all part of having an eating disorder. Even when you are ok you get used to brushing aside other people's (Pat's) concerns because she has been known to fuss.

I don't think Hellin is really aware of it either. If she were she might try to leave. I think she actually thinks Rob is right. Partly because of the unfortunate events where he has said something e.g. are you sure you should be going shopping? And then she gets sick.

(I was in an EA rs for years and yes I thought my nsdp was a bit of a arse and often difficult but I didn't realise it was abuse. Then spent ages kicking myself for being so dim)

Hoping this works !
I have just done really badly 2/10 at this quiz. apparently I am Eddie Grundy!

quiz

4/10. I am Ed Grundy. Oh the shame

4/10 for me too. It was always between 2 answers and I kept choosing the wrong 'un.

I would like to see Tom and Kirsty re united. I wish the saving of Helen would hurry up.

No no no to Tom and Kirsty
What has poor Kirsty done to deserve that poor piece of sausage.

It would be nice if some half decent young men turned up. Rex is half passable. Spencer was nice but dim. Rhys seemed nice but turned out to be an arse.

I know SmallLegs. What I meant was, she's been sort of evasive and cagey before. But now she is outright lying about what she's eating - or rather
not eating

I got 6 out of 10. But it should have been 7 because I got one right and it said, no, that wasn't Joe, it was Joe

Patrick is The One for Kirsty - she just hasn't realised it yet.

4/10 in the quiz for me too.

I got 7 but should be 8 with the weird one that says Joe is wrong, it's Joe! Few lucky guesses there tbh!

That's what I meant too ColdTea

Got 6/10. Not too shabby. Am now going to see how (new convert) DH does...

I think whatcI said badly BOOP was that she probably lies as a matter of course about eating. So the lying isn't new. But Pat noticing is new so there must be something to notice.

However, I wonder if people asked her about Rob if she would do exactly the same thing and project a false reality.