Sheeping With The Enemy - in a brand new bed? Discuss the trials and tribulations of the Archers

[PseudoBadger]

Just don't be so careless with your watch Helen

I don't think there is going to be any more Ambridge Extra as R4extra is concentrating on programming existing stuff not spending its on new stuff. I think I read that on the archers fb page or I maybe imagined it.

I am loving Rob and Helen - especially as its quite hard to feel any sympathy at all for her. I thought it was interesting she didn't tell Kirsty that Jess had been - because she knew what she'd say.

Burma it never ceases to amaze me that there are so many people with so much negative energy out there, willing to spend time and thought into making other people miserable. It must feed into their sense of power, need for control or something else the rest of us don't get.

sorry, I didn't mean to make you sad!

It is strange though

No please don't worry not me sad, just sad that such people do exist. I just don't understand why it would fulfill anyone to make someone else so utterly miserable.

but nonetheless, I am guilty of schadenfreude re Helen, she is SO annoying

Food, along with suicide (which he's already touched on) is one of Hellin's trigger issues isn't it? He's a malevolent genius.

It is difficult to feel any sympathy for Hellin as Rob is doing what she has been doing for years to her own family for years: using the fear of her reaction as a way of controlling their behaviour. Pat and Tony seem to bend to her every whim for fear of upsetting her.

malevolent is a great word

Gosh yes the combo of food and suicide almost in consecutive episodes. Malevolent is the right word.

The lovingly made tagliatelle were binned with the "tarts sauce " and the had bought penne with arrabiatta ... Complete food rejection.

Gawd knows what he's motivation is, I can't ( fortunately) even get near the mental processes that go on in people like this, but every move is calculated.

Chilling and very well scripted, I think this is SATTC . Is it Mr ceri's writing?

Hello all!! i've been away from computers and had the flu but still listened to MOST of TA how did the confrontation between Jess and Hellin finish?

WRF to EA I reckon it's inherited from your parents If it's what their parents did to them unless they're aware that it's not the right way to bring up the DCs then they carry on with the underhand controlling behaviour.

Enough with the fishy jokes!! Pleese Oh and congrats on the new thread BTW.

yy composhat i was thinking that helen has her very own emotional abuse strategies too, so rob may have met his match. though she is the more vulnerable of course so will inevitably come off the loser

sorry to hear you've been ill ppeatfruit

i htink there will be different motivations for different abusive people, but ultimately it is about control - of their environment, comfort, life, how they appear to other people etc - the people closest to them are not real people with feelings but satellites in their orbit who exist to serve their needs (whatever they may be) and any signs of independence must be quashed - the fear of things being out of their control trumps any misery in those around them

i guess there must also be others who actively and sadistically enjoy the misery of other people which presumably also relates to control issues

ppeatfruit! Wondered if the net had swallowed you up.

We didn't actually hear the end of the J and H conversation - but clearly whatever Jess said wasn't enough to convince Helen that Rob should never be believed.

yes we don't know what happened to jess afterwards. helen said she seemed drunk, and it wasn't made clear how jess got there - she said she had come from hampshire so she must have driven, or maybe a train+taxi, though it sounded more impulsive than that. so did helen really let her drive off again under the influence?? (probably)

i suppose helen might have put her up for the night and sent her on her way before rob got back

Helen doesn't want to be convinced though does she? So eager to believe that Rob is her knight in shining armour.

Thanks So i didn't miss how it finished ,that's strange in itself isn't it? Or the SWs are trying to control us now

Also Helen has really painted herself into a corner by being so dismissive of any fears that she is moving too quickly etc. How could she back down so soon, she would be admitting her mum was right all along?

Hello! Loving the new thread title.

Yes, he definitely paused when she said what they were eating, then enthusiastically said ‘sounds absolutely delicious’ or some equally over-the-top statement. I think if he just ‘wasn’t listening properly’ there would have been more ‘I’m busy’ ‘someone’s in the office’ type noises, or he just would have said ‘sorry, I didn’t catch that, what are we having? Tuna? Oh sorry darling tuna makes me wretch like a pathetic child’ or similar.

I would still call it gaslighting I think. You can tell if someone’s not listening properly, so he basically did lie about the way the conversation went, so yeah, gaslightingesque, if you will.

Ruth’s bleating (baboom!) about the poor cooped up sheep was extremely annoying. Rather clumsily done I thought. And I wondered where all this with J’lene’s outfits was going.

There were lots of cows mooing in the background

Ruth makes me demented

It did, for a second, seem as if Jolene might have been called to the great line-dance in the sky...

14. He blamed Hellin for thinking he had been at it with Jess and conveniently forgot that he had lied to her about where he'd been.

The EA will get much more obvious yet - it won't be clear to a lot of listeners so far. It's actually being done really well though I think - because its giving that nagging feeling that something isn't right without quite revealing how manipulative he is. I've been involved with victims of this a few times (professionally, thank god) and it is honestly incredible the lengths people go to. The food trigger was very clever - what's next? Has to be parenting - almost all mums worry they're getting it wrong.

PS I have dropped the idea that Iain is Henry's dad - there's been no hint all this time. Was Jazzer around then?!!! (just joking! - although he'd be good for Hell)

The other thing I noticed was the self-abasing way Hellin claimed not to be able to pronounce the name of the pasta dish. It's not difficult.....and Hellin's supposed to be well-educated, isn't she? (can't recall, but I assume she went to university). She could pronounce tagliatelle, after all - which she also made from scratch!

In fact, surely she advises customers in the shop about how to use their organic veg? Seems as though she's slipping worryingly quickly into the dreaded 'I'm so stupid but you know EVERYTHING, Rob, I'll defer to you' mode.

In view of Rob's fishy behaviour, heaven help Helen if she ever suggests a holiday in Sardinia!

Re drunk driving - Helen has form in that area. Remember she insisted on driving back from Borchester a few years ago when she had been drinking and she ran over Mike and made Tom take the blame.

Also Helen has really painted herself into a corner by being so dismissive of any fears that she is moving too quickly etc. How could she back down so soon, she would be admitting her mum was right all along?

Good work HumphreyCobbler. To me this is why Rob is ramping up the EA so rapidly, she's made herself suddenly vulnerable by the fact that she has to stay.

My sister has a pattern of relationships with abusive men but in her case they are all horribly damaged and unhappy as well. And by horribly damaged I mean that the war veteran with PTSD who spent his childhood in care was the one who had had the least unpleasant experiences. Not that it makes abusive behaviour ok, just a lot more complicated.