Made wrong move out of London. Help me get it right second time...

[backtothegrindstone]

The title says it all really. We moved out of London nearly 2 years ago to Dorking in Surrey. Its a pretty nice town, but we realised fairly quickly that it just wasn't the right fit for us, and after a lot of soul searching, we've decided that we'd like to move again whilst the kids are still young enough to get over it, with the aim of finding somewhere we can call home for good. There's nothing massively wrong with Dorking, but neither of us can imagine spending the rest of our lives here. There's just too many small elements missing and when you add them all together it makes one big reason not to stay. But I'm terrified of moving again and making the same mistake again. And there are just so many places we could go that I just don't know where to start. I'm hoping people could give me some ideas for places that might be a good fit for us, so I can start looking again?

We were really happy in London as we had a good circle of friends and a nice house, but we didn't really go into central London anymore and spent more and more time in our local neighbourhood. As more and more of our friends started to move out we had less and less reasons to stay and wanted a less hectic lifestyle for our boys. Now we've left, we are fairly sure we don't want to move back to London, but the move out has made us realise that there are a few 'city' things we can't live without that we're just not finding in Dorking. I'm hoping we can find at least most of them somewhere a bit greener and cleaner than London.

So negatives about Dorking for us have been that it's just a little too 'countrysidey' for us. We don't ride horses or have a dog or go mountain biking and we don't really feel like we quite fit in here. We've found the high street just a bit lacking in nice clothes shops and restaurants (especially non-chain restaurants, ideally ones that do brunch!), and it feels like a lot of stuff has closed down even in the 2 years we've been here. We've also really struggled to find a suitable house to buy here (we're looking for a 4+ bedroom detached period house with a decent sized garden within walking distance of the mainline station).

Ideally we're looking to move to a reasonably pretty and leafy 'commuter' town within an hour commute of London (preferably from a station with a minimum of 2 trains an hour) where you don't have to drive to do everyday stuff. Essentials include a supermarket, some decent cafes for brunch and lunch, some nice family friendly pubs, a private gym with a pool nearby, maybe a few decent boutiques and some facilities for kids like parks, playgrounds etc. Oh, and decent schools are a must. Other awesome bonuses would be access to Uber, a reasonable selection of takeaways, some decent bars/pubs and maybe a cinema.

Our house budget is reasonably health, and we're happy to go back within the M25 as long as it still feels green and leafy.

Am I asking the impossible?

Kingston/Surbiton should be no.1 on your list.

Followed by Esher/Thames Ditton

I know Woodford quite well and think it's (and those NW/Essex towns) probably too London for you OP.

@Disfordarkchocolate Anoyingly, nowhere really. They've either gone way further away than we want to, or not far enough

St Albans or Berkhamsted

For a four bed character detached, you're looking at around £1.2m I think though. Neither are cheap.

Beaconsfield, Marlow, Henley or Windsor.

It seems like you need to go slightly more urban so bigger places like Guildford or St Albans could work well for you compared to market towns. I think you do get a slightly different vibe as well (less green welly bridge). In all of the commuter towns, you’ll get ex Londoners but I suspect somewhere like Dorking, you’re spending time with people who actively picked it for access to the country, play in the cricket team, chance to ride a horse, have a dog etc whereas you don’t seem that fussed and that might be where the mismatch is.

Cambridge. Frequent trains, 45 mins to Kings X, small city so plenty going on but all still manageable. Green spaces, culture, independent shops and restaurants, theatre etc. As your DC get older they can cycle everywhere and be independent quite young.

Well, you have described Epsom really...

Can you afford Wimbledon? Especially the Village.

Guildford or Winchester
I wouldn’t touch Basingstoke.
Horsham.
Brighton but slightly further out - plenty do commute though.

To all the surbiton gang- looks close to Heathrow. What’s the plane noise like. Where’s the ‘quieter’ parts (in terms of plane noise).

Not Beaconsfield

@yetanotherthing - we are by Balaclava Park and it doesn't really bother us. Mind you, we have trains going past and you stop noticing them!

What about somewhere in the Chilterns?

Plane noise in Surbiton is minimal- nothing like Richmond/Kew

No plane noise in Surbo

Not sure whether the third runway will change that though.

Chislehurst
Bromley
Bickley
Bexley

No plane noise in Surbiton. But still easy to collect friends from the airport 👍🏻

To be honest, I'm a but surprised the op is so bothered by plane noise in dorking, it's not anywhere near under the flight path from Gatwick and not something I ever, ever noticed when I lived there.

Tunbridge Wells! We've got a 4/5 bed period semi for half your budget. You'll be able to get one of the lovely Georgian detacheds for that. Nice shopping, high street with 'posh' shops, Pantiles for eating out. Excellent schools. Most of our street came from east dulwich (we came from the less salubrious forest hill!)

With that money you can go anywhere you want though.

Another person coming on to suggest Berkhamsted. It has everything you've listed.

Market town with train to London. Good schools. Nice restaurants/pubs/bars. Cinema. Waitrose. Small enough that kids could walk to/from town from your house but big enough to not feel like everyone knows your business. Not far from MIlton Keynes if you needed a shopping centre. Leafy and green.

Hayes in Kent? On the Bromley borders. Great schools, lots of green space easy commute.

Another vote for Hayes in Kent.

I think you'd like Brighton a lot, especially the Preston Park or Fiveways area. It's quite expensive but I suspect Dorking is too and the areas I mention have nice period properties, lovely parks, good schools, great independent shops and cafes, frequent buses, Uber is in Brighton, and 3 train stations which would get you to London in less than an hour. It's a Great place to live and being up a family

I you can get to London in 1 hour 2 mins from Leicester. There are very nice suburbs (Stoneygate, Knighton, Clarendon park) within a 10/20 minute walk of the station and that area has some fab boutique shops too (Allandale road, Francis street and queens road) as well as all the big amenities a city should have. It was also the first city outside of London to get Uber...

I’m another vote for Reading. The area around the university is lovely, tree lined roads, easily to get to the station (15 minute on a bike) and I commute to Bank station. Takes me 1 hour 15mins. Your budget will get you something really amazing here for that. There is a lot for the kids and you to do and the countryside around is lovely. It’s bigger than you might be looking for but it has a crafty, independent arty movement growing. For example where I live they do artists walks every year where local people open up their homes to show off the art they have made. We love the Lido, you can become members and I swim before work. There are great parks and walks down the Thames.