ds is not good at art - now becoming noticeable - help!!

[zebramummy]

i need a strategy to improve ds' mark-making asap per his nursery report.

i never meant to compare him to his class mates at nursery but their pictures appear to resemble trees, people etc. ds is 4.4 but his art skills have actually gone backwards if anything. he only brought one picture home this term and nothing of his has ever been put up for display at nursery (yes, i do this at home before you ask)

i was apparently so good at his age that my nursery school teacher (a trained artist herself) predicted that i would also become an artist one day (i did not do this though remained quite good). i don't expect him to be that good; just able enough to colour the right bits of the picture in suitable colours and try to keep within outlines. his interest in writing has gone the same way too.

is there anything i can do to remedy the situation? so far, i have made available to him every medium under the sun to try out his 'ideas' - finger paints, glitter glue, crayons, chalks, all manner of paper and card.

he loves playdough though uses it more for imaginative play rather than for model-making. likes gloop, clay, helping with cooking but has had no cross-impact.

"so unless you have been a sahm from day one, spending a hell of a lot of quality time with your only child; reading and playing with them for as long as they like, taking them to wonderful places and regularly exposing them to as many amazing experiences as you could possibly dream up, then you are really not qualified to comment on my parenting."

ROFL. Can we have this as the quote of the month please.

And can people stop boasting about their 'qualifications' and 'degrees' and 'having been to Oxford' and what not, it's pathetic.

Sorry Heilig - it was meant as a joke because the OP implied that you had to have equivalent academic qualifications to her to comment on her parenting. I guess it didn't translate well to the board .

I'd fail on the SAHM thing anyway.

Its a shame the way this thread has turned out.

As the parent of an "arty" 5-yo with absolutely no talent in this area, I think there was some fabulous suggestions/observations given by others with experience in this area.

The OP was given some fantastic (and IMO measured given her op) advice. Not sure why she posted though as obviously she knows better!

Heilig I suggest you read the entire thread before calling other posters (who have read this from the beginning) 'pathetic'.

I did read the thread

If you don't mind me stepping away from the bun fight for a minute...

sb669 - how have you encouraged your 5yo? I have a 4yo DS who loves to draw, and am completely hopeless myself. I really want to nurture that in him because, apart from anything else, drawing seems to help him wind down (and have fewer tantrums!) after school. I've read that many children give up drawing when they are 7 or 8 and become self-conscious

stewie - i'm afraid it "got nasty" after i was personally attacked as being "a nightmare" and "unhinged" and ds' nursery dismissed as "shite" - i decided that i might as well get into character at that point (as for a further post insinuating that i am racist, my dh is not even british as explained within the context of that thread so i will not even bother to comment). glad you enjoyed it.

for the record, i am an oxbridge double first with several postgrad and prof 'letters' after my name; i refuse to elaborate further as it is only my business and i don't drop these into conversation as liberally as some posters. more than anything else it is prob because a lot of people in my family are similarly qualified so it is not quite such a big deal - i am prouder for my work with ds as a sahm than any other job i have done in the past .

acebaby - I would actually consider myself crap at arty stuff.

Usually, I just set the table with her art stuff (pens, paper, paint, glue, plastic scissors and sparkly stuff) and leave her to it. We've recently made a gallery of sorts in the porch where all the dc's can hang work that they're proud of. I bought some cheap frames from Wilkos so they look "official".

Last year they made some pretty impressive canvasses which we let them send to gp's as their own personal presents which they loved rather than wrapping something mum had bought and paid for. You can buy canvasses in QS for buttons although they're probably not as good quality as ones you would get from a proper art shop.

DS goes to an after-school art club but DD1 isnt old enough yet. She cant wait to start though.

This is an internet forum. Given your OP people were always going to have differing opinions on your parenting style.

You were given some fab advice but chose to dismiss it out of hand as coming from a bunch of degenerates.

Please bow out gracefully.

I rest my case...

Zebramummy - either you have completely mistaken who your MN audience is or you never intended to seriously take on board any advise or issues raised in this thread. I am not an arty person in anyway at all but there does seem to have been some appropriately qualified/experienced people here offering their thoughts and opinions (as you asked for).

We all like to think we do the best we can with our children but that does not mean that we don't make mistakes and should not review our stand from time to time.

FWIW - at 4yrs old, the last possible time before they go to school full-time, surely you should be enjoying the last of your time with him staying at home showering him with lots of fun, love and not worrying so much about the academic side of things?

Once he starts school you won't be his only tutor then. In fact your influence will reduce by the day. It is good to want to share interests but I a certain he also needs his own space to develop in his own time without being pushed.

StewieMom, I meant zebramummy.

Anyway I have spent too much time on this thread already, gave to go post elsewhere Happy fighting.

HAVE to post even.

ZM having double first degress from oxbridge unis does not prevent a person from being a narrow minded, rigid thinker, with an inflated sense of self imporatnce which has led to a distorted sense of priorties, which is how you come across in some of your, frankly quite outrageous posts.

An oxbride graduate is just a capaable of being a twat as the supermarket check out mother with 2 CSE's (from the days when O levth meant somehting hey??). But I suspect you don't think that is true.

(resists urge to post own qualifications)

I suggest you shut youself and your son away in your home for the next 13yrs, away from the mediocre teachers, low brow mothers, and concenerate on creating the genius with an eye for art, that you obviously feel befits a mother such as you, and you can then release him to oxford to mix with your kind.

Narrow minded eleitism does not equate to intelligence, in fact quite the opposite, though obviously they are not mutaully exclusive.

at thread descending into circular discussion re qualifications...and at OP being arsey about qualifications being raised when she er...raised it......

goodness I haven't heard the word pleb used since I was at school in the 70's.

I have a child about the same age, it hadn't occured to me to worry about whether he will share my interests, more concerned with whether he learnt his words for the school nativity concert (Gold carrying King).

Also hahaha at the idea that in premoldie mumsnet you would have got a better level of deabte about improving a 4 year olds art ability. You got away lightly and should be thankful we are just mumsnet lite .

Lynching of sneering perfect mummydom was much harsher in the olden days.

oh i LOVE this thread

please dont stop posting ZM tis very educational for me as a mere pleb

Well, I think StewieGriffinsMum has it about bang on in her summary.

A most entertaining thread, ZM, with some extremely informative discussion on education and art. So thank you for that.

But I've always thought that, no matter how well qualified and educated someone is, making a sweeping generalisation about a whole class of people is not only rude, but also, frankly, ignorant.

OP "i happen to think that i am a fantastic parent and i am very sure of my parenting having put in many, many hours of one-to-one quality time and fortunate enough to have a broad range of knowledge and experience spanning many disciplines; for the record,dh and ds happen to feel this way too"

What a silly, self regarding Mum you have exposed yourself to be with these comments. No truly good Mother knows that she is good, any Mum worth her salt harbours doubts and insecurities about her parenting - It is exactly this quality of self-doubt that makes her good. You clearly have not a shred of it.

"it is NOT rocket science (nor is primary school teaching either, really). i don't care if it offends anyone but among my peers, those who decided to become primary school teachers were pretty mediocre really". What a rude and unpleasant woman you are. A terrible advert for SAHM's and for Oxford. Both groups would be ashamed to own you as one of theirs.

Your poor boy.