School asking absent child to come in later

[TreeXmasTree]

Hi

My Y4 child woke at around 3am sneezing constantly with a runny nose and said he didn’t feel well enough for school. He’d been awake from then on, so I kept him home and left a message with school saying he had a cold.

School called back asking for more detail and said that under NHS guidance sneezing/runny nose alone are fine for school. I explained that I’m normally quite strict about attendance, but given he’d been up since 3am and was exhausted, I didn’t think he was fit for a full day. They said that was ok but suggested he could possibly come in later for the afternoon register if he’d had some sleep.

I said I’d see how he was and let them know before 1pm register. Just wondering where others stand on this - am I being overly cautious, or is it reasonable to keep him home for rest in this situation?

His attendance has always been over 99% so I’m a little shocked at how the school is handling this (although I realise this is due to pressure from DfE)

Please share your thoughts? What would you do?

TIA

I have worked for companies and managers who would do exactly this

Next time say he's off for personal reasons and leave it at that. If they pry more tell them its personal and nothing to do with them.

Mental. Honestly. None of this nonsense in Scotland. My boy was off all last week with nasty virus, went back two days and now off after an injury yesterday. All I’ve had is concern and care from school. Tell them to do one.

I think that's mad let the poor boy rest! The one time I've kept my DS off was when he was up from 2 in the morning. He will not rest even when ill so was massively overtired and a pain in the arse which I'm sure the school wouldn't have wanted to deal with. They never said anything about it.

I would be investigated if I was taking time off for tiredness and a sniffle. Kids wouldn't be allowed a day off for that neither (sickness, covered in blood, A&E worthy or unconscious or they don't meet the threshold for a day off here haha)

For an adult I'd agree, but for kids, I'd keep them home if they weren't well enough to get anything out of going to school. My kids haven't ever had attendance below 98% but I'd have no issue keeping them home in a condition that I'd soldier through and work in if I thought being home was in their best interests.

And how many of those teachers are 9 years old?

There are lots of unpleasant circumstances in life that we as adults often have to force ourselves to get through if there's no practical alternative, but we still don't put that same pressure on people whose ages aren't even in double figures yet.

He isn't paid to be there and the only one who will miss out by him being off sick is himself.

Yeah I'd give Calpol or other kids medicine then try and get him to sleep. Then wake him up, given enough time to get ready for school and ask/see how he feels.

Then do as you say and either take him in or tell school before 1 he's still unwell.

The child is in your care, not the school's, so use your own judgement. We have an awful culture in the UK of attending work/nursery/school when the body actually needs rest to get better. Also spreads illnesses to everyone else.

Bloody hell, I'd have told them to jog on. Their attendance records and policy are not my problem, and if I've decided my child is too ill for school, then he's too ill for school all day.

I'd rather a child had half a day too long off than go back half a day too soon. How much is he going to be learning with a runny nose and cough anyway?

I think it's just cos you said you were keeping him off for a cold. Which to most people means a bit of a sore throat and a blocked nose. My daughter just went school with a cold cos she was fine in herself. My son caught it and ended up with a raging temp for 2 days. Had they been school days I would have kept him off.
I just ring and say they won't be at school cos they are unwell. Never had anyone follow up.
(But my kids school isn't an academy, so no attendance based bonuses!!)

This is ridiculous! Why go in and spread the cold to other children .

Sorry, the school can go away. They're bullying.
You know your child, you know how rotten they are feeling and as the responsible adult, you made the decisions! And besides, colds can knock people for six for at least a day (at it's peak), they just don't get any sympathy.

Never use the word ‘cold’. Always say virus or viral infection with a raised temperature. If they ask for further details you say ‘generally unwell as expected with a virus’.

I think it's awful that the government is pressurising schools about attendance. They know their own families. It's not a one size fits all.
And many workplaces now say wfh if you have a bug, to save others getting ill. Some of his classmates might be vulnerable, and if not they'll have family that are, some of them at least.
What sort of society are we when a kid can't take one day off without a fuss (safeguarding aside)? All the kids' books from a few years ago used to start with the heroes getting into an adventure when they were having a convalescence holiday after flu (no, I'm not saying he has that, but the point was we used to allow people a little time to get better).

My son is now worried about the call from school and volunteered to go in later
Why did you let him know a out he call?
When ever school phoned I kept it out of earshot of the children. Its adult buisness.

My 3 had good attendance and no problems connected to attendance but no one would have been allowed to advise me on what was best for my sick child , i couldn't give a shiny shite on the huge pressure schools are under re absence.
It totally infuriates me that a good parent of a child with good attendance worries about keeping their sick child at home for a day and your comment about a cold being a poor excuse is another example of unreasonable interference, perhaps you are some kind of martyr who goes to work regardless of the severity of your illness, everyone knows how miserable a cold can be -other than you .
I hope the poor kid had a cosy day wrapped up on the settee.

Good luck with that approach!

OP - I'd trust your own judgement. Schools are under ridiculous pressure about attendance. And I can understand when presented with "child has a cold" that they may be encouraging attendance as they don't have the details - a cold can be anything from the snuffles to feeling absolutely rotten. Nothing wrong with giving the option of coming in for the afternoon, but you shouldn't feel pressured to do so if he's still very tired and poorly.

There will be another kid in the class bringing the attendance rates down so they will try it on with everyone to try and bring the average up rather than deal with the actual kid who the low attendance because the problem is their parents because it's easier to persuade and bully the other reasonable parents than to deal with the difficult parents.

To be fair some of the kids with low attendance had good reasons in DC schools - like cancer/transplant operations other serious illness - though some others had things I wouldn't have kept a child off for - hoildays concert tickets pets being taken to vets.

I followed the school police at secondary for DS - he was having an emergecy operation made clear to them- and still had a follow up phone call when would he be in which was bloody annoying.

As a governor you know this has nothing to do with safeguarding.
(Ex National Leader of Governance, chair of governors and governance professional).

To be fair based on what you told the school it’s fair enough they suggested it.

In general a runny nose and sneezing is not enough to stay home although sometimes it can be really bad and just make you feel rubbish. But you didn’t say this , you said he hadn’t had enough sleep and couldn’t cope with a full day.

if someone told me they couldn’t work at all day as they had a runny nose and had been awake since 3 I wouldn’t be impressed.
if they said they are feeling horrendous and can’t concentrate then that’s different.

I was a teacher for over 10 years. For all the people pointing out that teachers just have to soldier through it when we get colds, I'd like to point out thar we wouldn't catch so many in the first place if kids took some time off when sick. If they feel well enough to pay attention and work, fine, send them in. But I never enjoyed having to push through my fourth bout of sinusitis of the school year because my classroom had become a plague hospital. If a child genuinely feels too grotty to focus, forcing them into school to infect everyone else isn't going to help. They'll still need to catch up anyway.

Completely inappropriate for them to insist if his attendance is already very good, jesus christ. If you're sick, you're sick.

Sorry, I've not read all of the response. But I think school are being completely unreasonable. They shouldn't be calling you at home. Your child, your judgement. He's 8! He has had very little sleep, he is ill, and now he is stressed. I'd be really pissed off and would be complaining.