school overstepping ?

[cax]

So my daughter is due to start reception in September, she is currently at private nursery. I have just found out that the school have arranged for someone from the school to visit my child at her nursery, i have not had the school she will be attending call or email me to ask if this is ok and the nursery have not contacted me to ask if this would be ok there end etc…. i’m feeling a little irritated that i have not been informed or asked if this was ok, of course it would have been if i had been asked as i understand why they do this, but to not even be in the loop of what is happening with my child has left me a little upset and i want to make a complaint but first want to make sure i’m not overreacting to the situation, any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

Yes we get it you think parents should be informed but for what feels like the 100th time actually parents knowing or not knowing makes precisely zero difference to how the visit pans out so it doesn't actually matter if the parent doesn't know.

janiie, i have given up trying to make people see that not informing you about your child having a meeting without your knowledge is quite alarming, but i guess they just don’t care about there children, maybe there just happy to not have to deal with them they will let any old poop fly 🤷‍♀️

I was more than happy for my children’s reception teachers to go into their preschool to meet them-it’s excellent for their transition!

I assumed it would be happening, as it does in large numbers of schools across the country.

Sounds like your complaint is with the nursery then?

You can feedback to the manager that you would have liked to have been informed in advance that they had a visitor and they might want to consider changing their policy in future.

@Janiie it's probably there somewhere in the terms and conditions.
Like they don't need to tell you in advance that a visit from the local police to talk about "people who help us" is taking place - it's part of the general nursery day and curriculum.

@cax they hardly "had a meeting" with your child 🙄

I'm with you OP. it's not another visit happening its about the lack of you being told what will be happening with your child. If this is your first entering school how were you to know this is standard practice? I do find it a bit surprising the info isn't on the school website or included in an information pack or mentioned in a new parents meeting or something but I do not find it unbelievable.

well you could be right as i wouldn’t know i wasn’t invited 😬

@cax the teacher probably spent 5 minutes with your child.
It's no biggie..... really.

I'm repeating myself because people keep repeating the same 'why not stop overreacting' comments.

Teachers should tell parents that they are doing an official visit to see a dc in a place that the parent pays for. There it is again for those who are struggling to understand. School staff should not go waltzing in to other childcare providers without notifying parents. It is not ok.

I'm thinking a wind up, nice one OP, wasting everyone’s time, many who have shared really good information with you, to try and help you understand.

You are massively overreacting.
It is beneficial for your child. They are acting in her best interests. And she was probably one of quite a few being "visited". Cover for teachers to get over to nurseries is so tight you should be grateful they were able to do it at all tbh. This really isn't the big deal you're making it out to be, they will have had a handover with the other adults to ensure they can best support those children, and maybe watched them play for a bit.

When they are at nursery/school they are in the care of those adults. You really need to pick your battles as there will be plenty more things you aren't informed about once they start school!

It really is ok, usual, safe and within very normal transition process. Nothing to do with payment.

@Janiie so once your child is in the state system (so once they've started Reception) you will be ok if - for example - a potential new teacher for the school sits and reads a book with your child or builds some Lego with them for 10 minutes but without your advance permission?
Or is it just because you are paying into a private nursery?

It really isn't a wind up, why would anyone want to waste there time doing this, as quite a lot of comments where just nasty as hell and condescending and really got me down, so no not a wind up

The NHS have only changed their wording in the last two years, so it's still used by some people. They also say that those diagnosed in the past with Asperger's, still keep that diagnosis. Some private medical practices still use the term. No need to accuse the OP of stirring.

The norm would be the nursery would inform parents about visitors, not the visitor themselves.

@Janiie oh and word of warning....
This time of year there might be 15 year olds doing work experience at the nursery.
You unlikely won't have been told that in advance because it's so unbelievably normal to have this and to the children it would have just been "This is Miss Sarah who is helping this week".

@ReadingSoManyThreads ok I may be wrong.
It does suprise me that the NHS was using it 2 years ago as it was officially taken out of medical use in 2013 - but as I said I might be wrong.
I am surprised the OP would use it for her child though.
Anyway.... this has gone off topic. I won't mention it again.

@cax sorry if this is getting you down and as your child is autistic you are going to naturally protective over her (my daughter is autistic) - but situations like this within the education system are really normal. They are. They are nothing to worry about. Seriously.
I'm sorry if I have upset you in anyway with my comments (about the use of the word Aspergers) - I am genuine in apologising for that.
Starting school is a big thing. It should be exciting and a happy experience.
Don't start the journey by being the parent that complains all the time.
Best wishes for September 💐

But @cax it isn't alarming. It's standard practice in nurseries all over the country. The nursery staff were there. It's not as if your child was meeting their teacher in a room alone. I genuinely can't see the issue (I say this as both a parent and a teacher).

LOL the school isn't overstepping! Literally doing what they can to make it easier for YOUR child to transition to reception. Good grief. Feel free to complain to the nursery as to why they didn't inform you of a visitor to their class.

@Janiie do you expect nursery/school to tell you about every person that might say hello to your child, because that is literally what that teacher did

Thank you, I haven't complained or mentioned it as so many comment have said it is normal so yes maybe I am being overly emptionaly regarding the topic.

Ridiculous….. not a good start with the school if you’re complaining about them before your child even starts!!!! Schools/ teachers always act in the best interests of the children and they constantly get pulled to bits no wonder so many are leaving.
You will also be seen as a troublemaker from day one.