ok, ds2 claims the teacher pushed him, what can I expect to happen?

[kittywise]

Ds2(8) has a supply teacher covering for a teacher on maternity leave.
The class do not like the supply teacher, but I have said to ds2 that he just has to put up with it etc.
Today he came home and told me she had pushed him on the chest when telling him to sit back down.
Now he can be a naughty boy at times, not awful, just pushing the boundaries like many 8 year old boys, I am under no illusions.
After great questioning and giving him a chance to 'retract ' the statement I phoned the head and told him what ds had told me.
So, now what can I expect to happen?
I wish none of this had happened, either way it's a very tricky situation.

In ever other circumstance I have told him to take his punishment.

I know the class are easy because I know the children very well, I have seen them in their classroom AND all their previous teachers have said what a dream class they are.
They are certainly a doddle compared to many classes I have taught and I've never felt the need to push a child.

moomin you circumstances were exceptional you poor thing, it must have been very upsetting, i think you did the right thing I under very difficult circumstances.

Taking over a class mid year is never easy especially if the previous teacher is popular.

Thank you jodie, I was beginning to think I was in some strange parallel universe where teachers pushing children was ok

I know though that she laid a hand on him in an inapproriate way.
I do not know how hard she pushed him that is true.

As far as I am concerned there was no excuse for doing that. She should have used her voice not her body and THAT is the point I am making.

In all this there is a child getting the message that it is ok to defy his teacher because "the whole class hate her".

I believe that pushing a child is wrong. Pushing a child back down no matter how "gently" done is wrong and it is NEVER necessary, it is lazy teaching.

mrz, it is never ok to defy a teacher, they should always be obeyed and if a child disobeys then...

If my child kneeled up when he was supposed to be sitting on his bottom on the carpet then he did something he wasn't supposed to.. . HOWEVER I don't consider it to warrant more than a telling off.

She wasn't able to teach because your son wouldn't sit down.

OMG I despair.'Laid a hand on him in an inappropriate way'... 'Should have used her voice not her body'...Have you heard yourself? He was told to sit down, he didn't. No wonder teachers are leaving in droves. Tell him to do as he's told next time

what's this 'no touching' business? I have seen children distraught at their parent leaving them in school, being restrained (very gently) by primary school teachers with FULL support of the parents. I am SO glad our school doesn't operate in the way Kitty would wish.

What a souless, cold place it would be.

get real you lot, she pushed my son. I don't care what he did, she shouldn't have pushed him and that's that.

As I said any teacher that resorts to pushing a child is ineffectual and needs to work on their classroom mangement skills (moomin excluded). Or perhaps that's what they teach in college today " If the little sod won't do as he's told give him a shove."

Sorry if you haven't got the reaction you expected but in a few short messages it has already escalated from a push to a shove maybe you should wait for the facts

kittywise you don't know what else was going on, you have changed your story from him being told to sit down to being asked to lean back. I doubt that your DS has told you how many times he was asked, or what he was doing as he leant forward - for all we know the teacher was stopping him doing something dangerous. Until you have the facts you should not judge.

Hes 8, hes not made of glass, he has no brusing (I'm assuming here), he didn't do as he'd been asked.

The best thing you could have done, was to take it up with the teacher, that would have been direct and quite reasonable. Instead you report her to her line manager, which escalates the whole thing.

I'm assuming that you want 'action', from your first post. What do you think is approprate?

FFS Kittywise .. I thought you had reached a point where you knew what your next steps were going to be .. ie going to speak to teacher tomorrow and getting her perspective.

I think this thread has gone on too long, I think you're looking for an outrage that only a couple of posters share with you. It seems to me that when you see affirmation of your current emotional state it reassures you that there's an ishoo here.

Of course I cannot tell you what to do .. but I really think you should leave this alone now and speak to the teacher without feeling any righteous indignation. I think ringing the head was wrong on all counts, but you can hardly take that back now.

I stand by all my previous posts on this thread.

and good luck once again

Gosh. You called the head? When your son had been naughty? Sounds like a recipe for teenage hooliganism to me ...

Ask yourself this question , if you messed up at work, would you prefer someone come and tell you directly, or would you rather they raised the issue with your boss?

However you cut this your son was not 'abused' or put in danger. He may (or may not) have had something happen to him that you think shouldn't, which you have a right to deal with. Unless you actively want to escalate the issue, talk to the woman directly. If you are still not happy, talk to the head.

I get faintly irritated with the semi automatic response in school situations of 'See the head', 'Contact the governors', 'Write to the LEA', and 'get the woman struck off, hanged drawn and quartered and flayed until the blood runs.

Really, as an adult have a calm word with another adult and see what happens.

I think it's you that needs to 'get real' actually. She didn't send him flying, she didn't hurt him. If she's having to spend time telling him off when he's not doing what he's told, that's time she could be spending teaching everyone else. If he'd done as he was told this (as trivial as it is) wouldn't have happened. Get a grip.

My take on the situation would be to have a quiet word with the teacher in private (without son knowing) about what happened while giving son the clear message that he should have obeyed his teacher and sat down when told to.

It's not illegal for a teacher to touch a child. We have an in-house rule in our school that there should be no contact after Year 4, unless it's a formal handshake in a public place, or performing first aid.

We have that rule to protect the teachers, tbh. Too many children (none at our school at present, thankfully) blow innocent situations out of all proportion, and seem to have their parents wrapped round their little fingers.

ScienceTeacher, may I introduce you to the OP?