Angry about class split

[Annlenna]

My son’s school school is splitting the Y1 classes next year and just found out he has been split from his two close friends and most of his other friends. My son hasn’t found out yet but I’m absolutely devastated.

I do understand the school have their own criteria but, as a mum, I’m looking out for my son and I firmly believe this is not going to benefit him. We already struggled with school at the start of Reception so really don’t want to go back to him begging not to go to school.

I’m planning of requesting a meeting with the school to discuss so any tips on how to approach it with the school? Anyone managed to make the school change their mind?

Our school did this a few years above my DC. Kids and parents. Yes some of the parents also wailed in the playground stomping off to the head teacher. Thing is they are all put together in the playground anyway so they aren't strangers.

I really wish they did this to one of my DC class as they really need a mix up. The girls in the class just cannot get on with each other.

This happened to us, my son was separated from his closest friends who stayed together in the other class. He was very upset but then he actually made some really great friends in his new class, that he probably wouldn't have spoken to if he'd stayed in his original group. They've mixed again this year, and he's now back with the original friends and separated from the new ones.

I actually think its been really good for him, he's learned to cope with disappointment/change, and he's now got close friendships across both classes.

I know its hard but I'd resist the urge to interfere and give it a chance. It might be a really good opportunity to mix with othrr children

My DS was split this year, in Y4. I was gutted.
All of his friends were in the year 4/5 class and he was in the Y 3/4 class.
First of all I was more bothered that he was in the 'younger' class when he's one of the most capable in his year group. Then I realised he was split from all his friends, when they'd actually only just formed friendship groups in year 3.
Well we are a week away from the end of the year, and I assure you it's been fine.
He's played with his friends at play time. He's mixed with them during other things going on in school.
It's taught him life isn't always what you want .

Your child is only year 1, they tend to play with anybody at that age, more so than when they are older and they branch off into friendship groups with children with shared interests.
This is a great opportunity for them to mix with others

Oh also, I went into school when we found out. As did other parents.
It didn't make a blind but of difference, they've sorted it now.
To be fair, they know best. They've done this for all of time. Most kids are resilient and deal with it.
Even the parents of children with additional needs who were terrified of how their child would be affected, would say now it's been ok

What a waste of their time

This.

In year 7 I was completely split up from my friends. My other friends mum went in and made a right fuss and her kid got moved to be with her friend. I remember feeling really annoyed as I wasn’t happy with my class but I just got on with it cuz that’s life… in year 1 as well they’ll make new friendships really quickly.

And my daughter had 7 continuous years in the more disruptive of the two classes

And therein lies the downside of not reshuffling classes regularly.

'As a teacher I would be happy to explain any genuine reasons for this class reshuffle to a concerned parent and reassure you, and if it's an oversight I'd rather it was brought to my attention so I could look into what we could do to mitigate the situation.'

Really? Would you really say 'Your child is ill-disciplined and disruptive. We feel s/he is easily lead, thus we feel would do better in a class away from those who s/he is so easily lead astray by'?

Just as an example.

@Fordian

Yes, teachers are prepared to have conversations like that, and do! A bit more sensitively worded than how you have...

Perhaps though, it's not because op's child is in any way at fault, or because of any negative tendencies on her child's part 🤔 In fact, the likelihood is not, there are many more reasons the class was split how it was...

Any teacher worth their salt would be happy to either explain their reasonings (and stick to htier decision), or adapt if possible once they have had a chat with a reasonable parent.

As a teacher I'd happily explain. But it was never in my remit to change the class lists. By the time they went out to parents, altering anything would have a lot of practical consequences and right at the end of term when no-one has the time to unpick them.
And as I said, you can't tell children who've been given their classes, that they have to move to make space for a child whose parent who's complained. You just get more parents complaining.

My Headteachers have always taken the line that class lists are a done deal.

Or just speak to the teacher?

Maybe there will be kids in his new class that he hasn't had the option to get to know yet that will become new friends. At year 1, friendships are still very flexible. Most socialising is done at break times when he wil likely still see his friends from the other class.

My DC were in a one form entry primary and I wish there had been an opportunity to mix classes. By the later years in particular they were really getting sick of each other.

Wouldn't change anything in our school. It's done on age, which works well. They won't go changing he whole arrangement for one child. Perhaps find a child who wants to swap?

Ds2 was split from his friends but it's been OK. He has new friends now and still plays with his old friends too.

You seem to be reacting very strongly to this news about the class split. Wonder why this is. Many primary schools mix up the classes every year as a matter of course. Other schools do it sometimes depending on how well they think the classes work/learn/behave/ and how best to cater for children with special needs. The teachers and the school know how the classes and children are every day, you don’t because you are not there. Try harder to trust the school.
please don’t go into school making demands and demanding explanations. They don’t have to give explanations to you. Your particular child may not be the reason for the changes, they are not the centre of the universe.
at year1/year2, your child will very likely be absolutely fine in a different class at school. They may even do much better from the new arrangement. Try to be positive for your child’s benefit and your own.

You seem to be reacting very strongly to this news about the class split. Wonder why this is.

Because it's her erm, child. 😂

Many primary schools mix up the classes every year as a matter of course.

Nope not round here. Never heard of that.

Other schools do it sometimes depending on how well they think the classes work/learn/behave/ and how best to cater for children with special needs. The teachers and the school know how the classes and children are every day, you don’t because you are not there.

They don't always get it right. Classes of 30 etc.

Try harder to trust the school.
please don’t go into school making demands and demanding explanations.

You can be polite of course.

They don’t have to give explanations to you.

^Err they can always explain things. God alive.
We're not serfs to be told stuff without explanation.^
.
Your particular child may not be the reason for the changes, they are not the centre of

They are to you. Advocate for them.

at year1/year2, your child will very likely be absolutely fine in a different class at school. They may even do much better from the new arrangement. Try to be positive for your child’s benefit and your own.

Agree finally to something here.

There will have been all sorts of things to consider:

1. Parents requesting separation from other children.
2. Age balance across the classes.
3. SEN balance across the classes.
4. Gender balance across the classes.

You don't know what other considerations they had to take into account. DD is also in current reception at a two form entry and they've also split and mixed the two classes. We were told it was a long and complex process.

I didn’t realise everything I said has to be okayed by you

I didn’t realise everything I said has to be okayed by you

It doesn't.

But we're on a discussion site. Remember.

I think you need to remember that other people might hold a different opinion to you

Your post literally takes each thing I said and says whether it’s ‘okay’ or not.
then you say it’s not what you did. And add another put down.

@sunglassesonthetable ive managed to quote myself in error instead of you. Not the best at technology

You seem to be reacting very strongly to this news about the class split. Wonder why this is.

Particularly hate this kind of Condescension.

OP has already explained that she has had months of settling her young child into school in the first place. It has been problematic. Did you not read that?

And yet we still get the whole undermining and very subtle implication that somehow OP has a bit of " a thing".

See also : your child is not the centre f the universe.

Classic MN - let's put this poster down.

And newsflash to a lot of people their child IS the centre of the universe. And we don't have to pretend otherwise. It's not a failing.

Anyone/Everyone deserves polite explanation re their kids at school.

Your post literally takes each thing I said and says whether it’s ‘okay’ or not.
then you say it’s not what you did. And add another put down.

Yep totally. I found myself strongly disagreeing.

And I responded.

stop attacking me pls @sunglassesonthetable I’m entitled to my opinions just as you are to yours.
plenty of posters have also encouraged the OP not to make too big a thing out of the class mix

And just because you don’t think some primary schools mix classes regularly, doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen in some