Atheist in Roman Catholic Primary - experiences sought, please.

[ScaredHeart]

We have relocated and been advised that our two options going in at this stage to Year 3 are the Roman Catholic school, which is a very quick walk from home, or the no-religion school which is over an hour's walk away (traffic dire at peak times, I don't want to drive anyway). We could home ed in the hope that a closer non-religious school comes up for September - the LA says there is often movement at this stage in this borough.
DD is happy to see out this term home edded, as am I, but equally, ok to start if a preferred place is offered.

I am vehemently atheist. I cannot stand the religious imposition in schools. But the prospect of a short walk every day, Vs a very very long one, are giving me pause. I'd like for DD to make local friends, not ones who live over an hour's walk away, or further.

I wonder how seriously pushy most Catholic primaries are in this regard. Atheist patents with any experience or views? We will not go to church. I don't want DD being told god is real. (Unless during now and then, proof materialises.)

Other considerations.
RC school is one-form entry.
Non-religious one with current space is SIX-form entry.
Non-religious one with no space but may have space in September is four-form.
Would you pick the tiny RC school or the much bigger ones, if you had the choice?

Yes, true. My own experiences were full on convent schools with nuns. I understand that's quite rare now. Definitely going to visit. Fingers crossed for a nice vibe!

You are forgiven, my child. Five hail Marys for you.

I'm an atheist and had my kids in non-religious (community) schools.

Ime community schools vary a lot when it comes to religion. All primaries have to have assemblies of a broadly Christian nature but ime this depends on how religious the head is so picking a non-religious school won't guarantee no religious content. One school my kids went to only sung songs that were Christian where as the other sang songs that were more pop/positivity themed.

Catholic schools are generally not state schools in the way other schools are. They are voluntary aided so recieve 90% of funding from the state but the local catholic diocese pay the rest including for capital works. The local diocese owns the school and the land the school is on , not the government.
They have strict rules on the balance of school governors too ( majority must be faith governors to ensure keeping the catholic ethos of the school)
my own kids school ( both left now) us parents had to pay a £100 contribution each year to help towards the costs.

I share your atheist feelings, OP, and your frustration at faith schools in general. I'm fortunate that, although faith schools dominate our area too, there are good, convenient non-denominational options too.

Just on your point re: size - my DD goes to a 4 form entry school and I have no concerns about it. Yes, it's huge - but the classes stay together right through from reception, so it still has a very community feel. Plus the way schools are funded mean bigger schools often have more cash - unfair, but I'm philosophically unhappy about it, but it does benefit DD. So if you do go for one of the bigger schools, I wouldn't let this worry you.

I think many people are very prejudiced against Catholicism still. Those old convent schools with loads of strict nuns don't really exist anymore. My friends CofE Church and her DCs school are way more fire and brimstone than my DCs RC school. Anyway...the school still has to fill all the requirements of the national curriculum so it's not like your DC will miss out. They aren't going to get long lectures on God. My DC have one RE lesson, one collective worship and prayers first thing, before lunch and at hometime. Exactly the same as I had at a non-faith primary school in the 80s. RE has to teach about other faiths. My DCs school does this by doing 'other faiths week' at least once a term. Lots of visitors from the faith of that week, foods, dress, etc. In my diocese schools no longer do first holy communion and it's though your own Church. Stops everyone that's there for the pretty dress and there is no time to do it with everything that has to be crammed into a school day anyway. I wouldn't dismiss it immediately and go and have a look and get a feel for it.

I'd love pop assemblies!

Thanks for info!

What happens if people can't or don't want to pay the £100?!

Thank you re the comment on form numbers. Yes, lots to weigh up, I see the pros and cons.

No idea! Everyone I knew paid it ( or said they did) it wasn’t really discussed. I didn’t begrudge it anyway as I knew they only got 90% of funding , it was a fantastic school and really it was a bargain in the grand scheme of things!

No advice but solidarity from a fellow (lapsed) Anglican who was subjected to a Catholic school education.

I'm not sure that my DM realises that it's part of the reason I've become an atheist....

I guess it's a bargain if you can afford it!

Hi! 👋

Yes, same – my mother is sad that none of her children are believers. I probably would have turned out atheist without the schooling, but I think it's made me more atheist, if one can be so! 😂

What about cycling? I know that's not possible in all seasons but would be quicker than walking.

Have you asked about school transport? Sometimes schools have buses on for pupils who live further out.

Both my kids went to Catholic schools (I'm Catholic). One would consider themselves Catholic but lapsed, the other has been an atheist since he could talk. The school had a strong moral focus rather than Catholic specifically. Atheist child would have objected strongly to brainwashing etc, but welcomed the ethos of the school. I think you need to visit the school and get a feel for it. We had discussions at home re Catholic Vs Christian, and different views so my kids were very open-minded about it all. It was a really positive experience for both of them, and they both liked how there was a focus on students as individuals and their wellbeing, rather than just on results.

In all honesty, I would not personally send my child if I had the views you do. I completely understand it's your nearest school and understand the predicament that you're in, however my understanding is, if you do send your child there, 'you commit to being in sympathy of the ethos of the school' a statement that is made in most school admission criteria.

My nephew is in a London Catholic school and currently in reception. Religion is a massive part of his learning. Ie morning prayers, lunch prayers and afternoon prayers. He has had mass at church 3 times since starting. He had mass in school for Ash Wednesday. Holy days celebrated and the Easter liturgies. Competitions for Easter gardens etc. Yes they do learn other religions but overall RE is still big in all areas of learning.

Obviously the only difference is, we completely encourage all this as a practising Roman Catholic family. Yes numbers have dropped compared to when mine were at school or when I was and schools were 100% Catholic but my nephews school is still around 90% whether this makes a difference, I do not know. I think you should look at their section 47 report (diocesan report) and it might give you an idea how '`Catholic' the school is, if that is such a thing. As far as numbers dropping I've heard from our parish priest that this a lot to do with Europeans leaving due to Brexit (in London) also Covid has reduced baptisms too.

I hope you don't take any offence to my post, religion can always be a touchy subject and definitely not something to debate as we must always appreciate everyone's beliefs and i know these school ones can always get people a little heated. Eg shouldn't be faith schools etc or why are taxpayers funding them. I think people forget parents of these schools are also taxpayers and I know for sure Catholic schools own their school buildings and land. People forget that and it gets turned into terrible debates.

oh one last thing, Holy communion is not taught in school anymore. This is always taught by your Parish and weekly lesson are there. Yes obviously it is touched upon during school in normal RE but not like when we were kids and completed our I belong books there. Yes there is celebration masses for communion children and they have a day to wear their communion dresses etc but when mine were at school children made them all different times depending on their own family parish. Hope this helps

It would, but quite a faff with the bikes, especially in the wetter, colder months, and I'd really rather an easy walk, but also, I'd really rather she found some new friends very locally. I went to a school absolutely miles away and it would have been nicer to have more local school friends. So that's one aspect of it I need to think about too (as we relocated, so are all building up our friendship circles locally).

Thank you.

I'm all for good morals. I don't necessarily think morals go hand in hand with religion. But we are definitely going to visit the school and ideally speak with the head and others, and hopefully get a good feeling for the place.

I teach in a RC school. I would say 20% of intake aren't RC. We have two lessons of RE a week, termly other faith weeks, weekly liturgies, termly mass. We say prayers 3/4 times a day. Some of the children don't join in but as long as they stay silent and respectful during that time it's fine.
If you choose the RC school, that's great, but expect to hear about the faith, and teach your DC to be tolerant and respectful despite yours/their beliefs.

HC is not done in schools anymore. It’s done by the church and parents outside school hours.

fwiw we went the other way. Dc were at a tiny london RC school. I too was against a catholic school but visited anyway, and loved it.

yes there are statues of Mary, yes they go to mass now and again, and have a proper nativity.

but other than that I found the religious teachings were well balanced, and covered all religions. They had a Muslim student teacher on a placement and really used the opportunity to learn about the faith, even to the point of separating the girls off so they could be shown the hijab and how to put it on (as the boys obviously couldn’t see the teachers hair).

compared to a “normal” community school. No obvious religious links, but they used to go to church often, the vicar spent a fair amount of time in school, prayers, hymns, religious activities etc.

go and look. You might be surprised.

I really appreciate your input, thank you for taking the time.

I have just discovered that the ratio of RC Vs non-RC at this school is actually not far off 50:50, so this is actually hopeful.

And if it's one of the less full-on, and maybe open to being ok about us opting out of the very religious aspects, I think it could be doable.

Never heard of Section 48. Thank you - looking at it now.

Thank you for replying. That's a lot of praying. Crikey! I really don't like it.
But I also really don't like walking for an hour at 7 30 in the morning. And again at 3.30.

Sorry I meant s48, typo there lol 😆

Thank you. Yes, definitely going to have a proper look.
We have driven past, and it's in a beautiful little building.

I gathered! Worked it out.