What would happen if a child didn't want to do their work?

[Classof2032]

Basically that. My 5 year old was kept in at playtime and lost all of her Golden Time today. I feel it was extremely harsh and has the obvious side effect of her deciding that she doesn't like her teacher any more.

I think they have as much right to express a view as you or I and if they know things we don't perhaps their opinions are more informed.

Cody maybe the OP's daughter just needs 'extra support' without having additional needs, just like your daughter receives additional support for literacy without having any additional needs. Some schools would state those who benefit from any additional support have an additional need, albeit not necessarily a long term one. So we may be talking a cross purposes, here.

^at not a. Typo.

Cody I can assure you I am not the OP. And I think that comment is below the belt - just because you obviously don't like what I am saying, seeking to validate it by hinting at sock puppetry is not playing fairly.

Invalidate. Typo.

You do know that sometimes children can just be badly behaved and it doesn't have to be that they have additional needs?

just like your daughter receives additional support

Same as this DD teacher gave up her break - some teachers use golden time to catchup on their work - but this one gave that up to support this DD it's the same - not forced - helped

On occasions, yes, Cody. But sustained bad behaviour suggests they could have additional behavioural needs, since they require additional provision to successfully tackle and manage this problematic behaviour, provision which is additional to what is normally provided.

But sustained bad behaviour

Twice? In 6 months...

melonrobena I know the reason for refusal wasn't given but if a 5 yr old refused to do work, I'd be using my intuition to think perhaps there was a reason. It wouldn't matter if it was academic or otherwise, if she is anxious, I'd find something lower key for her to do.

So say if it was to write a sentence about something in their book, I'd perhaps instead ask her to draw it or use her finger in the sand etc to make marks. She is 5 for goodness sake. They're supposed to be playing!! Check out Finland and the way they do it op.
Such a shame the UK doesn't treat children in the same way the Finnish do.

Cody if it is believed that the incidents of negative behaviour occurred only twice in 6 months, why is the OP being criticised over her parenting and why are woeful predictions being given over her daughter's future? Why instead is she not being reassured that it is normal for children to test boundaries and her daughter will be ok?

Verbena. I do agree. I'd be using my intuition too.

I don't see how Finland is relevant though. Unless the Op lives there.

Finland has a very different culture and attitude to education

I understand that.

I think the predictions may be based on the OPs reaction rather than the child's behaviour

Which is why any comparison is flawed melon

Actually, I don't even think it was the child's behaviour that posters were commenting on, but the mother's. She seemed determined to minimise the poor behaviour and seek instead to blame the school (for the lost cardigan/homework/golden time).

X post. mrz

Thanks mrz

But, if as you suggest, the occasional slip is normal, there is nothing terrible to minimise or even punish particularly severely. A child, who most usually behaves well, was coming down with an illness and doesn't want to do her work. Previously there were problems as she had concentration difficulties which were upsetting her.

OP language is

Harsh
Punish
Force
Ultimatum
Battle

These are not the words of a supportive parent

Sounds very dramatic for a small incident of missed playtime

So you are criticising her over her semantics, Cody, she was guilty of being upset? Doesn't necessarily equate with being a terrible parent or haranguing and harassing teachers.

The difference is - if my child came home having been kept in at playtime to do the work set by a teacher - and it has happened - I would explain to them that the teacher was right - and I would apologise to the teacher for wasting their time - and that I would like to be informed of it happened again.

I would not be impressed by my child because I expect higher standards than "I don't want too"

I guess I just meant it's a real shame such little children are being punished for not doing work. In Finland, they have the best academic results worldwide, yet the kids don't wear uniform, they play outside for hours, they don't get homework and they call teachers by their first name. They only go to school for 20 hrs a week compared to over 30 here. It works.
Here, children are made to work in reception much sooner and with authority and punishments that shouldn't be seen until they're older.

"she was guilty of being upset?"

Most children/parents just accept it, learn from lesson, and move on/forget about it. Getting upset over lost golden time is a bit of over reaction? And all those comments from OP was only reason why a lot of PP has responded this way? Maybe you should check out Op's post once again, Lager? It's admirable you stick to defending OP all the way, but she is not even coming back to explain/defend herself...