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Pregnancy choices

This topic is for sharing experiences of pregnancy choices; to debate the ethics of termination, visit our Politics or Chat forums.

Original poster

Surgical abortion

93 replies

blackkat97 · 15/01/2021 19:19

Hi I was wondering who has had a surgical termination?

How long was the recovery process?
How long after did you wait to have sex?
Have you had trouble conceiving since?
Did it have a bad effect on hr mental health?? Thank you

OP posts:
lunalulu · 22/01/2021 02:34

Yes know it's ok to walk away if you want to.

You haven't had adequate counselling. Or any counselling.

You are under a MH team already.
This could be catastrophic for your MH. Far more so than having the baby.

I personally would advise against risking it. It may not be the simple option you hope. Certainly isn't as simple as it's sometimes painted.

Firegirl35 · 22/01/2021 13:16

Hope you’re OK OP, thinking of you

Babyboomtastic · 22/01/2021 14:26

Id caution against telling people you've had a miscarriage, as at that gestation because it's fully formed, many women they have a miscarriage get to cuddle/hold etc as part of the grieving process, and because the procedure for a termination is so different, that wouldn't be possible and it could lead to a lot of difficult and upsetting questions etc.

Bumblebee1980a · 22/01/2021 18:01

@Babyboomtastic

Id caution against telling people you've had a miscarriage, as at that gestation because it's fully formed, many women they have a miscarriage get to cuddle/hold etc as part of the grieving process, and because the procedure for a termination is so different, that wouldn't be possible and it could lead to a lot of difficult and upsetting questions etc.
But you can understand why she feels she has to after what the OP has said about being adopted.

I would recommend using a therapist if you need support and not your mum in this instance as the support wouldn't be the right support knowing she won't know the truth.

Original poster
blackkat97 · 22/01/2021 18:32

Just an update I've had the termination

OP posts:
Firegirl35 · 22/01/2021 18:54

Hi @blackkat97 I’ve been thinking of you all day. I hope you are doing okay. Take it slowly and be kind to yourself. However you are feeling now will be a normal reaction. Sending you so much love and support. Hope your ex is being attentive to you and we are all here if and when you need us xx Flowers

Original poster
blackkat97 · 22/01/2021 19:14

@Firegirl35
Thank you so much your posts have really helped.

I am feeling okay don't think it's kicked in yet but I think I'll be okay it's the right choice for me right. Now x

OP posts:
Firegirl35 · 22/01/2021 19:40

@blackkat97 that’s ok I’m glad I was awake to see your post last night and make sure you didn’t feel alone. You probably will be in shock a bit now and numb. How are you doing physically? In terms of how you feel too, just go with it it’s probably going to change day by day, even hour by hour. It’s still a bereavement even though it was a conscious decision, so don’t be surprised if you end up feeling things you didn’t think you would necessarily, it’s all part of the process. Definitely take up the counselling that you said you would. I missed my first counselling session this morning and today I felt a new emotion had a really angry day mixed in with the upset- shouting and crying at/with my mum. I ended up phoning back the clinic to rebook that counselling and they can only book me in for Thursday (but will phone before if they have a cancellation). Don’t forget to be taking the antibiotics if they gave you some.
I’m glad you feel that it was the right decision for you, keep hold of that. Your time to be a mother will come and will be all the sweeter for it when you are more ready. Put yourself first now and don’t lose sight of your dreams and all you want to achieve xxx

Mummymadness21 · 08/10/2021 21:03

Hey,

I'm due to have the procedure with sedation. Is it really painful, fine with decision just worried about pain x

SD94 · 01/01/2022 06:44

Are you able to speak about what happened ? I guess I just want to know what to expect

Ccxoxo · 17/01/2023 21:27

i hope you’re doing well. Just wondering how you are getting on now?

Ccxoxo · 17/01/2023 21:28

how did it go for you ?

Charley2317 · 07/04/2023 22:39

Hey, I know it's been a while since this thread was posted. But going through my own dilemma right now 😞. What was the most painful in your opinion if you don't mind answering. Miscarriage, childbirth or a surgi

Jsh125 · 16/04/2023 22:03

Childbirth, without question the most painful. Then miscarriage then surgical abortion. Here to chat if you need

Original poster
blackkat97 · 17/04/2023 14:34

Hi everyone sorry I have been absent. It’s been 2 years since the procedure and I can’t lie it has been hard.
the procedure it’s self was fine, didn’t hurt etc. but regards to my mental health I have suffered badly and live in regret everyday. I’ve also been diagnosed with PCOS recently so conceiving again will be hard

OP posts:
Lili132 · 21/04/2023 10:48

blackkat97 · 17/04/2023 14:34

Hi everyone sorry I have been absent. It’s been 2 years since the procedure and I can’t lie it has been hard.
the procedure it’s self was fine, didn’t hurt etc. but regards to my mental health I have suffered badly and live in regret everyday. I’ve also been diagnosed with PCOS recently so conceiving again will be hard

OP this is so much more common then people like to admit. I also had an abortion and it deeply affected me and I regret it every day.
I'm very pro-choice but I think it's something women have to be really sure of, not something that you go into with tears and doubt, agonising over decision.

I just want you to know that you're not alone and there are many women in your position who understand what you're going through and how painful it is.

You were in very stressful situation when you decided to terminate and it's so easy to be overtaken by fear, unable to see long term consequences of both options. And we never know the outcome until we actually experience it anyway.

Please be kind to yourself as you did what you thought was best at the time.

Your very young and even with PCOS you have a very high chance of being pregnant again. 💐

Hero63 · 23/12/2023 22:38

Im glad your doing well,

i know it’s hard to go through and if you regret it even worse, I have PCOS and have had an abortion and have conceived with no problem

did you manage to get counselling?

SuperVee · 13/04/2024 09:31

Hi there,

I just wanted to share my surgical abortion just yesterday. 15 weeks.

I just got separated with my husband 3months ago when i found out I am pregnant and it wasn't an easy decision wether to terminate it or not but I think this would be best in my situation right now.

I had mine done at MSI Westmead in Sydney. I got to the place earlier than my appointment, I waited so long before the nurse checked me. Anyway I had a unconsious sedation. The waiting in the clinic is soooo long and I am already tired and super hungry just before the procedure starts.

honestly, its like magic.
i remember the last step, the nurse called me and explain to me that she is one of the nurse that will assist me thru the surgical abortion and made me change for a gown to before they start. The last thing I remember is when one of them start outting the drip to make me sleep and he said "you may feel a bit drowsy" and thats it.... I didnt remember anything, i was asleep while they surgery..

i wake up calling the nurse and she said "how are you. It's finished. You are now in the recovery room."

and i dont feel any pain, i have bleeding yesterday a bit heavy and today only spots. No cramping today. I almost feel like normal..

i am super relief... Glad I made this decision..

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