Pregnant and scared

[scaredgirl16]

I found out today I'm pregnant and I'm scared and don't know what to do.

Hi just wanted to give an update.

I have a doctors appointment later today, feeling really nervous and a bit emotional today.

Hi there. Well done for sorting out your drs appointment. I'll be thinking of you.

Thanks for the update. Well done for being proactive - you're definitely making it easier for yourself (even though it's so intimidating).

I'm sure it will go well at the docs - they will see this relatively often and will just want to do their job and give you the right support. Of course you feel emotional - you're human, you're pregnant and it's overwhelming. But you're being responsible and it will be fine. Good luck for later x

Don't be afraid to tell the doctor how scared you are feeling. You can be really honest with her/him. They are there to give you support and help. It might help to write down what you want to say beforehand if you think you might get a bit tongue-tied.
I wondered if you might like to read this thread in the meantime. A girl who's only a couple of years older than you was in a similar situation last year only she had left it too late to have an abortion. If nothing else it might just distract you a bit while you are waiting for the appointment.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/3336158-Unplanned-Pregnancy-Support-Needed-Title-Edited-by-MNHQ#prettyPhoto

Last paragraph reads a lot bossier than it was intended!! Sorry! Should have put

Linked thread is a wee bit of a fairy tale though with a very unusual happy ending. Good luck at the GP's.

Still thinking of you and wondering how you are doing.

Hi Educating

Went to my GP appointment yesterday and feeling a bit better about things.
She has referred me now to the hospital so just waiting to hear when my appointment will be. Im just worried now that the appointment might clash with my exams.

Glad you’re feeling a bit better after your appointment OP.

If it does clash, phone the hospital and explain and ask if there is an alternative appointment available without extending your wait too much. Don't be afraid or embarrassed to do this. Ask nicely of course but doing a GCSE is not a trivial reason for asking for a change. It maybe that just by moving an appointment to the end of a clinic you could make it after an exam, for example.

You’re doing great, it must be such a difficult time for you with everything going on. Just to reiterate that even if the appointment isn’t an exact clash but is at an inconvenient time like the day before an exam, then do call up to see if there’s a better time as you’re very early so there isn’t a big rush and there will probably be some choice of appointments if you ask

Thanks that's really good to know that I can try and rearrange the appointment if i need to. I guess I just want everything over with as quick as possible so I can try and get my life back to normal.

At only 6 weeks you've got a bit of time, delay the appointment if you have an exam to go to. Easier said than done but try to concentrate on your studies and take your mind off this. Your dad will never have to know if you don't want him to.
(Doctor)

Hi OP, how are you doing? X

Hi I'm doing ok thank you.

I have an appointment with the counsellor on Monday which will be good.

I don't know if this is normal but when I found out I was pregnant I was sure I wanted an abortion but these past few days my mind keeps constantly changing between keeping the baby and having an abortion.

Give yourself some time and remember you are allowed to make whatever decision you like. Make sure you make it for yourself. Thinking of you, and good luck for your counselling session. I had my first daughter at 16 (pregnant at 15) and she is my best friend in the whole world, I wouldn't change a thing about her or our journey. Thinking of you sweet

I think I know deep down the choice I have to make. I can't see how I could possibly cope with a baby at 16 and have no support off my family. My dad will throw me out as soon as he finds out I'm pregnant, my mum moved away when my parents split up I've not seen or spoken to her since then. I don't have any other family members to rely on for support.
I would have no home, money and I would have to fit in A levels with a baby. I guess people have bought up a baby in these circumstances and coped ok but I don't think Im strong enough.
Im feeling so alone at the moment I just wish my mum was around to chat to :(

Hi OP, I'm so sorry you have nobody to talk to - I've had an abortion, and it helped so much having someone to support me. I bet if you had someone beside you to hold your hand, and 'validate' your thoughts and feelings, it would lift some considerable weight (it did for me, anyway). I hope the counselor will help fill some of that gap on Monday.

The decision to have a child is huge even for women in couples,10/20 years older and with a house, job etc. it's pressure like no other. You're doing the responsible thing weighing this up so carefully, and if you decide not to go ahead you have very valid reasons, and should be proud of yourself for taking control.

I believe these things have a way of working out, and one day this will be something you look back on. Focus on Monday, and for what it's worth you have us to 'talk to' in the meantime. Please keeping talking or asking questions on here if it helps x

Thanks abso I will focus on Monday and hopefully I will feel more sure about everything after. I feel anxious about it all as I don't really know what to expect.
It does help a lot to chat on here thank you all for listening and for the advice x

You're bound to feel anxious, it's such an intimidating situation - my abortion is very recent so fresh in my mind if you have any questions. I had a medical (pill) one at 7 weeks. I wanted surgical due to the horror stories I'd read online but due to timings the medical was the best option, and it was honestly no worse than a heavy period. The nurse was very kind and explained everything very clearly. I took the strong painkillers provided beforehand, which I'm certain helped kill off the worst pain before it started. I saw nothing gruesome and felt physically very well hours later.

That's not intended to influence your decision - it's just that I was SO scared of the medical, and want to put out another side of it so you don't torture yourself beforehand like I did and potentially allow that side of things to affect your decision.

If you decide to proceed with the pregnancy I'm sure the counselor will be able to point you in the direction of places to get advice and assistance.

As you say, tomorrow you'll hopefully have a bit of a 'plan', and will feel more in control and less worried :) Let us know how it goes if you want to x

The decision to have a child is huge even for women in couples,10/20 years older and with a house, job etc. it's pressure like no other. You're doing the responsible thing weighing this up so carefully, and if you decide not to go ahead you have very valid reasons, and should be proud of yourself for taking control

I completely agree with this!

I hope that speaking to a counsellor has helped

Couldn't agree more with @Emmapeeler x

Hi everyone

I had my counsellor appointment yesterday and it went well. After talking to her I have decided that terminating the pregnancy is the right decision for me.

Thank you to everyone on here to for chatting to me/giving advice that has helped me get through this too.

In that case I would get a wiggle on OP, medical abortions (the tablets) aren't available beyond 9+ weeks for hospital terminations in general, and generally only go up to 10 weeks and 0 days at BPAS (apart from staying in and delivering the pregnancy with them in clinic)

@cheesenoplease Im having a surgical abortion