This is going to be a venty sort of post but I need to so bear with me.
I had my scan yesterday and the good news is all is fine but god the hospital stressed me out.
Turn up to clinic and wait 30mins. See lovely MW who has looked at notes and tells me how sorry she is for my previous loss. I feel so grateful. Pathetic really but so nice for someone to acknowledge it.
30 mins later see registrar who explains consultant is in surgery. Fair enough. She has no idea why I am sat in front of her. She is clearly in a rush to extent she does not sit down. Not fair enough.
Tell her MW wants me to be scanned for growth and that I am here for induction date. Huffs and puffs (literally) about scan - basically tells me all MW's are rubbish tells me they would only be concerned if differential was greater than 2cm, point out mine is 4cm nothing to worry about she says blah blah.
Then the bombshell she cannot authorise induction. Come back next Thursday. Tells me to go and rebook and ask for scan then. I say I want scan earlier. That is what MW has requested. She leaves come back and says there are over 30 people waiting for scan no chance. Best to tie it in with clinic in another week she says. I cry.
Explain I am extremely anxious and have been waiting for weeks for this date. She is half way out the door, nothing she can do.
Go to reception to make appointment. No appointments for three weeks as consultant on AL. Ask what I am supposed to do. Sent back to where I came from. See another lovely MW explain situation "why aren't you being scanned today?" she asks. I tell her doc said too busy. She says "but I only have one lady waiting".
I am scanned by the kindest, loveliest sonographer who wants to know all about F and tells me, with tears in her eyes, how sorry she is. Baby is fine, doing well all is good. She takes her time and reassures me at each step.
See another registrar. Flicks through notes. Refers to my two children and "unfortunate situation" last year. He tries to correct himself but it is lost on me. I am too stunned to say anything and feel sorry for him as he is about 12. Only on my drive home do I get angry and think FFS you are a Dr. you should know how to talk to the bereaved.
Back to see mean (first) registrar sarky "happy now". Obviously didn't confront her about blatant lie re scan list.
Finally see consultant. 37.5 wks is earliest she'll induce. Worried about potential issues if earlier. Can accept this but wish she'd said this at last apt: I have just had sentence doubled!
So good news in the end. But took 4 bloody hours and I was absolutely exhausted by it all. Baby will be a bit later than I had anticipated but as long as she is safe and well, how can I mind? But FFS you'd think they could manage themselves a little bit better.
You know what I have done a job where you get info at the last min. I know what it is like to have a file thrust on you with 30 secs to prep and no prior knowledge. You read what you can and apologise for what you can't. The Dr I saw couldn't have cared less how I felt, it makes me so angry. Of course none of it is actually worthy of complaint it is just so below par as to be laughable.
Anyway I hope all is well with everyone else
SH77 the CONI scheme looks good. Obviously different circumstances for me as F never lived but I have found this pregnancy quite stressful due to feelings surrounding not just history repeating itself but also the idea of another baby that is not F. I worked through some of that with my counsellor so I can imagine that the scheme would be extremely supportive.