Totally's GRADS...lets handhold thru this....

[boodleboot]

Ok girls....time to get started....

lee stressy amyboo totally

and of course any other ladies who have recently had a Big Scary Fat Positive and will now literally be counting the days to healthy babe in arms, welcome y'all

i have no idea how i am going to make it but i know that i will need handholding....and knowing lots of you already i know you will too ha ha

{Totally's conception thread got me thus far with lots of handholding and i love them for that....}

BRING ON THE BABIES.....

totally i know someone who named their baby and had a ceremony, the baby died at 7 weeks and without sounding unsympathetic, I found it strange that she knew the sex and went just as far as having a ceremony but thats just because for me too it is and was a very private thing. People in work know it happened but i've never uttered a word about it, even tho my team discuss everything from what you had to breakfast to marital problems but there's no way i could talk about it.

I guess its down to different strokes and all that..

On a more positive note, i havent felt nauseous in an hour and a half yippeeee

Can i join please

I had a miscarriage at 17 last year and came out of it in pieces. I fought hard to keep it and by doing that i got thrown out, my family didn't speak to me until i had my miscarriage which really broke my heart.

I'm 18 years old now still a young one and i'm around 6 weeks into my pregnancy. I've been with my boyfriend for about 3-4 years now. It's been really difficult at the moment because neither of us have had a clue of what to do but i knew in my heart that i couldn't abort.

Most of you are probably thinking that i'm way to young to bring up a baby and i understand that and i'm willing to accept other peoples opinions.

x

hi pineapple you are more than welcome and please dont think you'll be judged for your age.. in my humble opinion, believe me there are women of all ages who make good and bad mothers and if you want to be a good mother then you will be regardless of your age..

i'm sorry to hear you had such a hard time with your family last year.. do you think they'll be more understanding this time?

hope you are ok xxx

hi pineapple - i had my daughter at 21 and i am a fine mother just as you will be to your bubs. its got nowt to do with age in my opinion and all to do with love. Hop up on the settee and hold on to some hands. we'll get there together. hope your family are more supportive this time but please try not to get stressed....we are all against stress....its bad for you and the baby....

hi everyone, thanks for sharing back your experiences re feelings around your MC and this pregnancy. i feel better to know i am not alone in feeling like this. No naming ceremony from me however. Will prob do something on Nov 5th tho. that is my, sorry was my, due date. fireworks seem fitting i guess.

can't wait for friday to book in with the midwife. it will be two weeks since i found out then too so will do another clearblue digi then to see if the weeks have gone up....i don't know, pregnant and still doing tests.....insane eh. x

Morning all.

Have been absent over weekend so just catching up on thread.

Sorry to hear you're having such a lousy time GiPi - as the others have said though - you'll be fine on your own. Just stay stong and positive and do things on your own terms - Big hugs.

Hi to memorylapse - and lots of extra handholding - you sound like you've had a REALLY rough time over the years.

Welcome too to pineapple. As the others say - age means nothing - the fact that you are determined to be a good mum and give bean all the love in the world is most important. Hope the family sees the light soon.

Well, as for me - still knicker checking. Still no real symptoms (am guessing am about 5+2 or so) and can't help comparing lack of symptoms this time with same last time but am trying to stick to the thread rule of not stressing. Am being referred for scan in a couple of weeks but that feels like FOREVER!!

Pineapple- I got pregnant with my DS at 21, and plenty thought I was young, but I love being a mummy. My mum got pregnant with my sister at 18 and is a fab mum. Don't worry about age.

Stressy- I wouldn't worry about symptoms, they're going to get you eventually so just enjoy not having them at the moment. I'm still poorly and tired at 15 weeks. No glowing for this lady.

Boodle- I did that with the clearblues for reassurance and it did reassure me. You'll feel better when you see the midwife. Instead of it being like 'if this pregnanacy works out' it's just like 'where do you intend to give birth?' etc so they treat you as you will be their patient for the next 40 weeks IYSWIM.

Pineapple..my first dc was born when I was 18, I was at college and took my last a level exam 2 weeks before she was born.fast forward 18 years and she is a beautiful young woman who has made me incredibly proud by being accepted into uni to study phsycology..my second dc was born when I was 21 and I dont feel that Ive been any different a mum to them than I have been to my younger dcs who were born when I was 29 and 32 respectively..Im sure you will be a fab mum

Thank you Paranoid for sending me here - I almost cried with relief when I heard about this thread. I've copied my post from the other thread just to tell you about me.

"I miscarried what would have been my 3rd child earlier this year - the miscarriage was fairly awful and I bled very heavily for 7 weeks afterwards.

DH and I were going to give it one last go (I am 40 next year) but then I got a job and swine fly descended and I began to think that maybe it was best not to. After having tried for 18 months to conceive the baby we lost I suppose we thought that it would be that difficult again and were'nt particularly careful. My period failed to come and I tested on Saturday (6 days late) and got a strong positive. I wasn't ecstatic just very frightened after all that happened last time but over the last couple of days I have begun to get used to the idea and my feelings have changed to more what they should be.

Yesterday I was very irritable (like PMT) and this morning my breasts are no longer tender (my nipples were excruciatingly sore last night but nothing now). So I am beginning to think it has happened again - loss of symptoms = miscarriage. The thing is that my 2 previous miscarriages were missed ones and I didn't find out until 10 and 12 weeks - obviously I don't want to go this route again but if I went for a scan now it would be too early to see anything, wouldn't it - I should be about 3 weeks.

If you got to the end of this - thanks - haven't told anyone IRL yet (apart from DH) - my Mum will just say "It wasn't meant to be" - she doesn't get that this doesn't help."

Lol, sorry Paninied - I misread you as being Totally and Utterly Paranoid - which is a little how I am feeling at the moment

not to worried Jacanne- think I should change my name to that sometimes

Everyone will be along soon to offer advice and support (and some hand-holding), try not to worry in the mean time.

jacanne I had a mmc at 13 weeks (baby died at 12 weeks). With this pregnancy I've been scanned at 5+4, 8+2 and 8+5 (due to bleeding), and I'm due to be scanned again at 10+4 (next week). At 5+4 I was able to see the fetal pole and yolk sac, so it might be worth going for an early scan if you're worried. By 3 weeks, do you mean 3 weeks late? In which case, you're actually 7 weeks pregant, so you would definitely see something on the scan - maybe even a heartbeat.

Morning ladies, I hope you all had good weekends. All strangely okay here, have started to feel really rubbish! . Yay.

Not actually being sick but feeling it most of the time, only helped by eating. Am still paying my slimming world membership though! Will tell them soon I suppose, but would prefer not to balloon as have done previously.

I have a scan tomorrow will be just over six weeks. Will they be able to see anything? I keep trying to prepare myself for the worst, but know that you can't really prepare for it anyway so trying to think positively.

jacanne Hello, I am pregnant with number 3 (I have 2 boys) and had 2 miscarriages last year which whilst early were still dreadful. My breasts vary day to day with regard to tenderness, one day last week I woke up and they were not sore at all, I was all distressed and worried but by lunch time they were really sore again. Wierd!

I would try to get an early scan if at all possible. Good luck. x

Thank Draughts - reassuring to hear that about breast tenderness. I feel kind of detached from everyone IRL at the moment and find it really hard to make conversation about normal life - I suppose it's because we're not telling anyone. Last time I had a bleed at 8 weeks and a scan - baby seemed fine, heartbeat, right size and everything - they told me that I had a 96% chance that all would be well. Bled again at 12 weeks and had another scan which revealed that the heart must have stopped beating sometime just after that first scan So after our good odds we decided to tell people (especially as there was some curiosity with regards to hospital visits etc)which made it so much harder afterwards.

I am one week late today - I was due on last Tues so I guess that makes me 5 weeks now.

Hi everyone, Do you mind if I join. I'm on the may thread but I think this is more the thred for me at the moment.

I am currently 5+4 weeks pregnant and terrified. I have 2 boys age 6 and 3. I also have a girl who is nearly 2. I had a mmc inbetween my 2 sons. After my daughter I have been pregnant 3 more times. The first ended in mmc at 12 weeks with twins. Then I had another mc in November and another mc in Febuary.

So here I am pregnant again and just feel like it is all going to go wrong. I am to scared to talk to anyone. I haven't told anyone not even my dh. I don't want to phone the doctors either. I know I could have an early scan but I'm to scared they won't see a heart beat and also even though I know they are fine I don't really want another internal incase it starts a mc. So basically I am trying to hold of until the 12 week scan if I can get that far. It so hard after so many mcs to think positive although I am really trying to. I am so grateful for my 3 children as I know with out them it would be so much harder. I just so desperately want my fourth child so the family is complete. I am also moving in a month so trying to not get stressed about that. I just want to stay as happy and stress free as possible although its easier said than done with 3 children. So I hope you don't mind if I join you as I have no one else to talk to.

Hope evryone else is doing well xxxx

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...................

The obstetrician office just called me to organize another scan since the heartrate was a bit slow on the previous one. It took them almost a week to let us know, as the sonographer sent my results to the wrong practice since I changed office and they did not register it properly. I am now so worried, I've checked online, it increases chances of mc by 25%, but there is no info about what are the ones if you've had a previous mc. I am now so stressed, I still have all the symptoms, so I am holding onto that. The scan is on Thursday morning but I am suppose to fly out with DS in the evening for Paris. It is going to be a long journey as I have to fly into London Gatwick from Bermuda then connect to Saint Pancras for the Eurostar, it involves going from train to taxis to train etc... I am not sure I should do that on my own with Ds but then, once the journey is over I will get my mother's help for 3 weeks which I don't get here, especially as DH is working on a big trial and has become almost the invisible man. It is also so hot. I am just a mess...

Sorry trying to say something positive but cant' at the moment.

Hello all
Back and reunited with t'internet now. What a lot of news in the last five days. Amy so glad all was ok at your scan, despite bleed. Hello to Gipi, Memory and Monkey. Welcome to the paranoid thread.
Well, I've had a horrible five days. Please will someone talk sense to me. Am completely convinced I've mc'd again, even though no blood and no cramps beyond the squidgy sort. I do still have sore boobs, but no other symptoms at all, despite being about 6w. I'm worried because my symptoms seem to be decreasing rather than increasing. No constipation, no "tight" feeling in my tummy, no sickness, no cravings... normally at 6w my stomach is big already but not this time. Because I mc'd at exactly this stage 7 weeks ago, I'm just sure history is repeating itself. What should I do? Is there any point even going for a scan at 6w? Or should I just sit tight and see what happens? I just want to cry all the time. I can't think of anything else. Truly, I didn't used to be this sort of person - my first pg was so relaxed, I was so gung ho - but after a mc, as we all know, it's impossible to be relaxed again. I'd really appreciate some advice as I don't think I can bear to feel like this. I feel so alone with it. Thanks v much and hope everyone else is feeling more positive.

Me again - I posted the last message without realising I'd missed reading a whole page of posts. Sorry if I sounded insensitive to anyone. Hello also to Lizzie and Jacanne - having read your posts after posting my own, all I can say is I feel your pain, am right there with you. Hope you both feel less alone now you've joined this thread - let's support each other.
Prisci fwiw I think you should still go - it is a long journey but think of the help you'll get at the end of it. Just get a kind stranger to lift your cases; that's the main thing. If you don't go you might just drive yourself mad with worry. Can you get a scan done there, or is that a silly question?

Sunnydale, it is not too early to have a scan, I had my a scan last week at 6+3 and at least you would know what it is going on instead of agonising on what might be for weeks on end.

I get a scan on Thursday and I am very lucky ,as if I go to France my dad is a Dr so he should be able to squizz in a scan with the office he works with. I think I am not going to cancel anything yet and wait for my scan on Thursday before making a decision. I just worried how I will manage on my own with Ds (16months old) for the trip.

Hi again everyone - just been updating myself on all threads. Symptons - don't appear to have any expect a rather large tum (considering a "should" be around 7 weeks!!) Early dating scan on Fri but am worried as I think it will be an internal as my womb tilts back - can an internal scan really bring on mc???
To the "youngsters" - I use this term cos I am classed as a "geriatric mother" being 40 - please don't be offended by the word "youngster" when I use it - doesn't matter what age you are, you will be a fantastic mum cos you will love your baby as much as you can and he/she will know it - and anyone who says differently, ignore them!
Still knicker checking - still getting little flutterings and now wondering if I am carrying twins !! (I am a twin and the baby's father has twins in his family too!!!)
Had some news today - hope you are all sitting down - baby's father thinks it would be best to terminate - I am SOOOO angry with him - has said that if I do go through with pregnancy he does not want meet the baby etc etc !! This just makes me all the more determined to ensure I carry to full term and have MY baby !! sorry to tell you all this crap but need to get it off my chest and hope that is OK with you all xx

Sunnydale..they should be able to pick up a heartbeat at this stage so if you are really worried, see if you can get yourself an early scan to put your mind at rest.

Hi all.. Had bad news at the scan today so am signing off this thread but can I say thanks for all the support and that I'll be praying for your healthy beans..

Lee xxx

Am soooo sorry Lee - take care xx

oh lee honey - so sorry - have been keeping an eye on you girls here (i know you haev been dropping in on us too) look, you know where we are if you need us, no judgement, 100% support ...whenever you are ready xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

lee so sorry to hear your scan didn't go well. Sending you virtual hugs.

GiPi1 I've had 3 internal scans with this pregnancy and 2 with the last one (ended in mc). As far as I'm aware, there's no increased risk of mc with an internal scan. Here in Belgium they only do internal scans till about 14 weeks, as you get a much clearer picture of what's going on.

sunnydale - Glad to have you back. Hope you're not panicking too much about your scan on Thursday. Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Hello to everyone else. Absolutely knackered today - insomnia seems to have kicked in, which s horrible as work's really busy and I could do with being awake. Sigh.

Oh Bloody hell, lee i wish i could see you and give ou a hug. what a bombshell....so heartsore for you.

i am getting to the stage now that the pregnancy failed at last time....i didn't prgress past 6 wks last time. feeling very nervous. trousers are tight as once again i turn to food to stop my nervousness...{doesn't even work....}so natch i feel bloated and fat as butter....boo. self induced, self induced....i know.

i did a clearblue digi test and the coception indicator has gone up to the 2-3 wks since conception so that is good.....i will do another one next week if i don't get a scan by then to see if it goes up to the 3+ sign. lee bad nes has thrown me tho....just when you think you are safe-ish....boom and its all gone. poor girl, oh how we can all sympathise with her eh...