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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Totally's GRADS...lets handhold thru this....

997 replies

boodleboot · 23/08/2009 23:15

Ok girls....time to get started....

lee stressy amyboo totally

and of course any other ladies who have recently had a Big Scary Fat Positive and will now literally be counting the days to healthy babe in arms, welcome y'all

i have no idea how i am going to make it but i know that i will need handholding....and knowing lots of you already i know you will too ha ha

{Totally's conception thread got me thus far with lots of handholding and i love them for that....}

BRING ON THE BABIES.....

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied · 28/08/2009 11:03

Lets keep calm, I am sure there are going to be no MC's on this thread. I'm just sure of it. We've all had our share of crap.

I'll keep saying prayers for all the beans.

I've got work this afternoon and I'm really tired. Also, I have one pair of maternity pants, one maternity top, and one maternity jacket, so I'm wearing the same stuff as yesterday!

DH is treating me to the cinema and restaurant tonight, then we've got a meal out with his auntie and uncle tomorrow and they're treating us. I can't really face it if I'm honest. I find myself feeling really shy and awkward, and I look like a tit. Can't wait for tonight though- it'll be lovely to have some time together. I will work my way through a large popcorn

boodleboot · 28/08/2009 12:26

Morning everyone. I been up to eyeballs in work and just too knackered to comtemplate interneting in the eve....i am sooo exhausted come six o clock it is ridiculous. stressy we are having identical fears and feelings - i feel so crampy and full down there like i am going to burst too....also i am really constipated and definitely need a really good poo but i sit down and nope, nada....very annoying. no real sickness to speak of yet but boobs are still growing although not that sore, tender but bearable. i agree tho that until we hold these babies or at least reach a week where they could be born and have good chance at surviving we will all over analyse and flinch at every little squishing down below. I never even knew about iplantation pains....of course there may be pain whilst they implant!
glad that your scan showed all ok amy great stuff.....i don't know what i would do without you all on this thread....its so nice to have people in the same boat as me so i don't have to watch what i say and try to sounds rational all the time (like with RL)

OP posts:
TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied · 28/08/2009 12:31

Have you noticed how many of us have gotten pregnant so soon after the conception thread beginning? It only started in April and look how many of us there are on here. And I'm sure more will join us soon.

Boodle- I've got to say, I had that bunged up full feeling with both good pregnancies. It sounds like things are working.

I can feel baby fluttering from time to time, and it sort of falololped last night, if that's a word. 6 weeks til next scan. Can't wait. Want to know if it's a girl or boy!! Is anyone else going to find out when it comes to it?

LeeWT · 28/08/2009 14:18

no i'm not going to find out. had a section the last time and will be having one this time and i find the needles etc all very stressful so need something to get me through..

i know a girl wasnt going to find out but then found out she was having triplets so she thought she better be prepared!! - 3 boys!

how many dcs does everyone have/not have? i've one dd, just turned 2.. the cat will be among the pigeons when a new one comes i tells ya!

Prisci · 28/08/2009 14:23

Hello everyone,

Just weighted myself and I have lost a kilo so far. I am already pretty skinny, it was the same with DS1 one and I ended putting on 36lb but I am so much more nauseous and tired this time. I am also starting to have a small tummy and have to go to a playdate around a pool this afternoon. I am not sure how to hide the bump. DS loves going in the water, maybe I will make some kind of jokes about not having exercise for a while or something...

totally, I definitely want to find out the sex if all goes well, I've already checked the dates for it etc... I have a good reason though, Bermuda is not great for shopping so I will need to stock up, if we go away for xmas, well it is my excuse and I am sticking to it . We would love to have a girl since we already have a boy, but will be happy with either and won't be trying for a third one.

Off to unstick the playdough from the carpet....grrrrr

boodleboot · 28/08/2009 15:49

I have a 10yr DD and a 5yr DS {also 12yr DSD}and as much as i love my son to bits i really would like another girl.....be stoked to have what ever tho.. i think i will have to find out even tho i would love to hold off for a suprise i know that i can't....and actually don't like suprises anyway

i'd like to be able to plan ahead. that said i have boys name totally picked out if boy and really struggle with girls names that i love that aren't too bizarre so maybe a boy would be easier.....

someone at work who knows i am trying for another baby asked me if i was preg today....she said i look different.....i said yes but as its soooo ridiculously earrly and i am so nervous to keep it to her self....its nice to have someone at work who knows tho actually as if anything goes wrong at least i have someone there who knew..IYSWIM

glad everyone is well....prisci making me slightly envious of LOSING weight and being skinny to begin with.....

oh and had very lovely poo totally {TMI for sure.....}

OP posts:
GiPi1 · 28/08/2009 17:54

Hi - have been reading all your threads and wondered if i could join ?? Although I have had a miscarriage it was 6 years ago and shortly after fell pregnant with my dd (now aged 5!!) I am now very newly pregnant but Doc and I are unsure as to how far gone (possibly 5 weeks but maybe 9 ??!!) Got an early scan next Friday and am worried sick that I will miscarry before then.

My mc last time was found through the 12 week scan at which time the surly sonographer told me rather untactfully that the baby's heartbeat was slow and that she wanted me to go back in 2 days for another scan. I went back after worrying myself sick for 2 days, for the same sonographer to tell me literally "no, theres no heartbeat you will need to go for bloodtests and then a DNC"!! Charming - it was awful - I had no mc symptons, no bleeding or anything and now am so worried (and worried all through my previous pregnancy!!)

I love the phrase knicker checking cos am doing that all the time too - my tummy has grown quite a lot already - boobs don't seem to be getting a bigger just yet but am getting a lot of fluttering in my tummy (can't be movement already!!!) and some cramping but am hoping that is my tummy stretching etc etc.

helpet · 28/08/2009 19:35

Totally and amyboo - thanks for calm and rational words. Feeling sooooooooooo crap right now I am fairly calm!

Wondering if it's because I got preg again straight after mc that I just can't believe it. I am stupid - I should just be incredibly grateful and leave it at that!

I have a ds of 20 months - he's an adorable handful!

Hi GiPi - that sonographer sounds awful - with my mc the sonographer wasn't that much better, and my friend was told she should have tried to have children when she was younger! What a g*t. Oh and when I had a postnatal haemorrhage (can't spell it) the sonographer said "isn't this just a really heavy period?" - my baby was 2 weeks old at the time!!! Simply biology really! Many sonographers are wonderful but the ones we are talking about are clearly muppets.

My knicker-checking is somewhat out of control. When I'm out and about I sometimes panic about finding a loo so I can check, and wish that I could just pull down my jeans and have a quick look!!! Don't worry I haven't!

Have a happy positive weekend ladies xx

stressyheady · 28/08/2009 20:20

Evening all and welcome gipi.

I do wonder sometimes whether sonographers, gps etc forget that they are talking to real people with actual feelings!

Don't worry helpet I'm a complete stress monkey too - I'll be over the moon when I start feeling crap! I'm knicker-checking for Britain too!!

Just to add my stats - 1 gorgeous DS aged 3 (currently potty training and coping with ALOT of poo in wrong place so prob just as well that I'm not feeling sick yet!) not finding out what I'm having as really don't care. Although I said I didn't care last time, if I'm honest I wanted a boy so now that I've got one anything's a bonus.

GiPi1 · 29/08/2009 07:51

Not had a good evening last night - partner has left and don't know if he will be back !!!

A bit of history - I was married to my childrens father but we separated 3 years ago, met my partner 1 year ago but he finished our relationship 2 weeks ago !!! 3 days later I found out I was pregnant, told him and he was over the moon !! He didn't discuss with me about us getting back together, I think he just presumed that we would and he kinda just went forward with that. Well yesterday, he had been out at work and when he got back to my house, he asked me what I had been "doing all day as the house was a tip" "the children have had their friends round to play so you had 6 hours to yourself what have you been doing?" Well, I wasn't very happy and did have a bit of a cry (not in front of him!!) I felt so insulted - he currently does not have any children so really has no idea of the work involved (he is 46 and I am 40 so "older" parents!!) Anyway the crux is that he went back to his own house last night after I suggested that he did so before we both said something we regretted. As he left though he said "just remember it was you who told me to go". So I am guessing he won't be back!!!

I am even more worried now and hope all the upset does not bring on mc and I am wondering if I can give my new baby everything he/she needs on my own - I know how much I will love him/her but is that going to be enough? hope you are all getting on well keeping those beans warm and snug !!!

TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied · 29/08/2009 10:08

GiPi- Hi love, I've seen your thread about somewhere else. You can definately give your baby what it needs- you're already doing that naturally with the other two. I can't believe he could be so insensitive. Please don't think you can't do it alone, because you can! And I'm sure your other DCs will help out along the way. At least they're at a stage where you can say 'can you pass me the wipes' etc, rather than having two very young children. You can't be expected to be on top form all the time when you're pregnant and if he's going to be around, that's something he needs to realise. My dad had a similar attitude to this guy when my mum was pregnant with my DB, and both the times I've been pregnant. It is the most frustrating thing in the world. It sounds as though he's set in his ways, and has such little tollerance for any of you (from your other thread). I might be totally off with that, but it does sound like you're having such a rough time. Please remember you can come and lean on us lot any/all of the time. You might sort things out with him, you never know, but now might be a good time to stamp your feet and let him know how things will be if he wants to be a part of your family.

About the sonographers- I don't think they're trained in dealing with people and emotions, and I don't think they see people as an individual, just as another bit of work for the day. My sonographer just said 'well I can't see anything' when I MC'd. Not the worst, but not the best. She was horrible to me one time when I went for an emergency scan with DS so I'm very warey of her. The other ladies there are just lovely though, so i always hope I get them!

Hope everyone is ok. I'm disgracefully hormonal and MIL made me cry last night. She wanted DS for the day and night (which worries me anyway). We popped round after work and she kicked off saying what do we have to go round for, and that if he's unsettled when we leave we're banned from going round. SIL was my bridesmaid the other week and MIL said she was going to throw the dress in the bin because our car was full and we couldn't fit it in at the time. She must have said about 20 nasty things while I was there so I just left and cried all the way home. Had a fantastic night with DH though- he took me out on like a date was fab.

GiPi1 · 29/08/2009 11:18

Thank you so much "totallyandutterly" although I don't know you, it means so much to have support - I know I can do this on my own with my 2 DC and that I just have to be positive and concentrate on keeping my bean healthy and happy !!!! Only a short one cos am going blackberry picking in a mo then will make some apple & bb crumble - yum yum !!! xx

GiPi1 · 29/08/2009 11:19

Sorry I forgot to say a big thank you to all of you for your lovely words and support - i am so pleased I found this site !! x

LeeWT · 29/08/2009 17:39

gipi cant say much more than totally has said which i agree with. the only thing i would say is that my mother brought up three of us and although it wasnt a typical family i wouldnt change it for the world. of course you can give this dc all it needs.. hope you are ok

totally thats dreadful about your mil. does she know you are preg? some people are so insensitive. my dh has been amazing because i'm so sick but then had a go at me today infront of my dfil and i was morto!! had a little cry and decided to log onto mn and moan

hope all the beans are happy and sticky

xxx

monkeymayhem · 29/08/2009 19:36

hello ladies! can i please join your thread? helpet directed me this way because we're in very similar situation. i had mc at 5 weeks and have fallen pregnant again staright away so now about 5 weeks again. constantly knicker checking and generally feeling stressed. also have a dd who has just turned 2. will try and catch up with thread tonight and tomorrow but right now supposed to be working so think i'd better get on with that! hope everyone has lovely evening! monkey x

TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied · 30/08/2009 12:50

Hi MM, course you can join. 5 weeks is a hard time isn't it- particularly if you've had bad news at that time before. I still find myself knicker checking when I go to the loo now and I'm nearly 15 weeks. I've never inspected loo roll so closely in all my life. It's best to keep positive for the bean (she says).

I've had pains for a couple of days now. I suppose it could be stretching and growing as I am getting a bump now, but I obviously can't help but panic

hoops997 · 30/08/2009 16:34

Hello Ladies, how the devil are you al on this fine Sunday afternoon.......I'm good helpet with regards to my insomnia it's all gone it only lasted about a week....thank goodness...

amyboo glad to hear everything was ok with little amybean.

Well I was moaning that i didn't have any smyptoms, but I was at a wedding yesterday and had horrible sickness and it ruined my day....so no more moaning from me!!!

Glad to see this thread has grown in strength and I agree there will be NO MC (nasty) in this thread......

Hope you and your beans are ok......

boodleboot · 30/08/2009 21:03

felt a bit poop today.....not physically, just mentally....its really strange and i will only try and articulate it to you ladies becuase you are already aware that i am a bit crackers....i have been feeling guilty for being excited and content to have this new baby growing in my belly, like i am 'cheating' somehow on the baby that i lost....its really odd....and irrational... I am so absolutely over the moon to be having another chance at carrying a baby to term but don't want the baby that didn't make it to be looking down from anywhere thinking that i 'prefer' this baby....OMG, seriously i realise that i sound totally deranged

i like to think that this pregnancy is another chance for that baby to be born. i guess i am just still feeling sad at the MMC. Pregnancy hasn't eroded that sadness totally i guess.. I'm sorry girls.....do you think i might be hormonal????

other than the mental issues which should be clear to all now, ha, physically i feel pretty ok at the moment other than INSANE hunger and total knackeredness...

welcome to any new people....i'd like to say that normally i am sane but ahem....that may be a lie....

OP posts:
memorylapse · 30/08/2009 22:01

can I possibly join here too?..Ive tentatively posted on the due in may thread but feel that I could do with some hand holding..first baby 19 years ago was still born at 26 weeks, followed by 1 healthy dd, followed by a v early misaccarriage, follwed by 3 healthy dcs, then four years ago lost a baby at 16 weeks and then at 23 weeks..the strain caused me and dh to split..but then we got back together and anxiously tried again..fell on my first cycle so naturally we have convinced ourselves that our bean will not stick..I am knicker checking every 5 mins..and keep re testing (using the ebay cheapies) just to check..Im about 4+4..and dont really have any symptoms about from slightly tender boobs and a craving for bakewell tarts..Im 37 btw

Prisci · 31/08/2009 02:35

totally just ignore anything MIL says, just appreciate that she is looking after DS, it might be useful when the bean come Mine is also a pure nightmare despite being thousands of miles away. They might be coming in October and we've just found out that she was trying to get DH sister to come with her two kids including paying for their tickets. She has not told us anything about it, and we are currently helping them a bit financially since they apparently need it. I am absoluteky furious, we are quite tight at the moment etc... pure selfishness, she also lied to DH sister by saying that we were living Bermuda in Feb so it will be the only opportunity .

Sorry needed to let some steam out, I have also been having cramps this weekend and only want to beleive it is streching.

gipi my mother also brought me and my sis on her own, it was not always easy but we knew that she loved us and where trying her best, so we understood despite being young.

boodleboot no need to feel jealous, I am sure I will put the weight on eventually, like the last time and because I am not use to it, it is even worse, my body does not know how to cope.

On a real positive, today is my first day without breasfeeding. DS has finally accepted it was time to stop, the only thing left is for me to teach him that he should not be playing with my nipples instead. It is pretty funny, he looks at my breasts, so I tell him he cannot have them anymore, he gets annoyed, puts his hand under my top just to check they are still there and pull my nipple for a while. Once he is satisfied, he just stops and continues with his day. A few days ago, he was screaming his head off when he could not breasfeed so it is a big improvement .

amyboo · 31/08/2009 08:01

Blimey - sounds like everyone's been having a stressful weekend. Hello and a wave to all the new people. Sorry to hear about your dp GiPi. I read your other thread I think, and agree with totally - you can so do this on your own. You don't need someone around who'd gonna make you feel crap like that.

Sounds like fun with the MIL totally and Prisci. My in-laws are a nightmare, but thankfully they like 700 miles away in another country. They never ring to see how their son is, he always has to ring them - even after the mc they didn't ring to see how he was doing, and they've been through the same themselves! I really can't stand them. All they ever talk about are my nephews (who live 3 miles from them) - it's as if we're failures for not having kids yet. Urgh. In-laws

I've become a knicker-checker extraordinaire over the weekend. Not bleeding anymore, but still have a bit of coloured discharge (sorry TMI) and it's worrying me a bit. Gynae said only to worry if it went bright red again, but I keep worrying as I seem to have some twinges as well... I'm not supposed to see him again for another 9 days - don't know how I'll last that long!

Some of the sonographers you guuys have had sound horrible. My first gynae (for mmc) was a bit like that. Hardly spoke to us at all about what was going on, and made me feel like I was wasting her time when I asked questions. Thankfully here in Belgium you can pick who you like, so I found a new guy recommended by a colleague and he's much nicer. He was so sympathetic when I rushed in with bleeding the other day. Saw me within 4 hours of my ringing him.

Anyway, mammoth post and better go do some work

boodleboot · 31/08/2009 09:07

Totally-15 weeks- DC#2- Due 24th Feb
hoops997 - 9 weeks - DC#1 - Due 2nd April
LeeWT - 8 weeks- DC#2- Due 10th April
Amyboo -
Boodle - 5 weeks? - DC#3 - due 30th April

i think seeing as the thread is growing at a rate of knots we should try and get some kind of list updated so we all have an idea of who on and where we are...

and gipi i'd like to say that single mothers rock. i have been a single mother and know just how hard it can be and just how many personal sacrifices they make for their children and how willingly and without thought they do so....you will be absolutely marvellous....besides which when all these beans are born into healthy babes we shall simply set up a 'totally's co-parenting thread' so fear not, you WILL NOT be alone

totally , prisci, In-laws can be a nightmare {mine have sadly passed before i had chance to meet them} but its my realy family that are driving me mad at the minute....mum asked me outright if i was preg as she knows we trying and i said yes but very early and we very nervous...she was more excited about my welsh cousin falling pregnant.....mums have a way of making the blood boil with the slightest inflection in their tone....well mine does ha

OP posts:
GiPi1 · 31/08/2009 10:37

Morning everyone - thanks so much for you words of support - I KNOW that i can do this on my own am a bit worried about being the oldest mum at the school gates though with me being 40 and all that !!!! ha ha ha!!! Really pleased to hear that everyone is getting on so well. I am not sure how far gone I am as my periods were a bit sporadic prior to conceiving (even thought it might be early menopause!!!) .

Do the Clearblue Digital tests really work? Have got a dating scan on Friday but can't wait that long - will if I have to though! My tummy has quite a bump on it when it is usually dead flat, so am wondering whether I have got twin beans in there!!! Oh my god - what then??

Boodle - know exactly where you are coming from, felt the same way when I was pg with dd and will NEVER EVER forget my lost baby as will none of us!!

Felt very emotional yesterday and felt like bursting into tears all afternoon - not good cos was at a bbq with some great friends - 2 weak white wine and sodas whilst everyone else was getting gradually plastered but hey ho !!

Please let me know if it worth buying a digital test to get dates!!! thanks guys and bye for now

LeeWT · 31/08/2009 10:56

boodle I know how u feel it was only in may that I lost my baby and it feels like because I'm pregnant now and sick and obsessing that that baby has faded away. That baby would have been due on Xmas day and I know I will find it hard.. I think it's ok to miss the baby you lost and I think it's ok to be happy about this baby .. I wish I had a way of identifying the baby i lost. When I say "the last time I wasn't this sick" dh assumes I'm talking about dd.

Hope you are ok boodle..

gipi I used the Clearblue digital the first week I found out and it said 1-2 weeks from conception, then I waited couple weeks and it said 3+ weeks but apparently they aren't infallible. Worth the money if you are worrying and good luck for Friday ..

Well thank god it's the bank holiday I can lie in bed feeling sick and worried about tomorrows scan.. Have told my angelbean to look out for this bean.. Wish me luck xxx

TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied · 31/08/2009 12:03

Hi sweetie pies

Just wanted to say morning to all really.

Had a read through and I totally understand what people mean about their MCs fading away.

DH's way to deal with it at first was to think that because it was only 6 weeks, it wasn't really a baby, it was natures way of correcting a mistake. Like a baby gone wrong. Now he thinks of the MC as a baby now he's got his head around it. But I thought of it as a baby and now I feel like it wasn't IYSWIM. My friend has recently had an MC and she's had her three kids names tattood on her back, and then agel wings around them to represent the MC. She was only 6 weeks- same as me when she MCd and so I find it sort of strange. She refers to it as her 'baby that died'. Where as I think of mine as a private thing that DH and I went through IYKWIM. At the time it was awful and I felt like I'd failed a baby etc but it feels different now. I don't know what to think really.

Good luck for your scan Lee. It will be fine xx