The Roaring 40s- We're a bunch of old windbags!

[duchesse]

Here tis.

I knew I'd forget something!

I was talking to DH last night about the SF jab that'll be available at the end of October. Apparently K will be in the first wave as she's classed as high risk. My gut instinct at the moment is to not let her have it. It's untested on under 3's and there are no known side effects as yet (well there won't be will there if it's not been tested?)

I know that jabs in the past have carried side effect such as the one in the 70's that caused Guillain-Barre.

Unless they come up with something a little more concrete then I think I'll be turning this one down.

This really is devil and deep blue sea territory.

Morning all.

Was a good night until A decided 04300 was morning and wouldn't go back to sleep afterwards. Well, he did, in 5 minute increments. I finally woke DH at 0603 and headed back to bed until just now.

floria and JW I obviously can't relate because my DH shares the load 50/50 with me 95% of the time. This may change when classes start again at the end of September, even if he isn't teaching this term (still up in the air at this point). But I do sympathize!

JW I've been having the same thoughts about the new flu jab. I am considered high risk due to my diabetes, but I agree, this one is just not tested enough. And from the sounds of it, they still don't know if the virus is going to mutate. So the jab may be for naught.

Well, today's plan was to go to Farmer's Market and then to look at the Tall Ships. May change that to staying home and looking at the telly.

tee I think you're in the minority that your DH does 50% of the parenting. I'm sure that not many men do that much. My DH actually told me he finds playing with babies boring. At least he's honest I suppose.

Maybe it's down to the difference of the sexes again? Dunno.

Morning all. Gosh floria what a time. Dictatorship eh? Mmmm, I'm with jw on the theories of how that evolves. I've hung back on taking many decisions with my DP lately and suddenly he's realised that not much has got done! So, I pointed out that it's a two-way street - either he pitches in and helps out or he shuts up when I do something he doesn't like/agree with

jw SNAP! DP looked at Verity the other day and said "oh, I like you now that you're getting interesting - I don't find babies much fun!"

Good to hear that Wales was a hit AND DSS is going back too. Wow - result AND I gets me bread Seriously I adore N WAles - even though it rains 90% of the time. My grandad had a small farm just between Snowdonia and Caenarfon Bay - simply stunning. You walked up a big hill and there was the bay sweeping before you...turned round and then there was Snowdon...stiring stuff.

I'm with you on the jabs. Can't help feeling it's a bit rushed. Just doesn't feel very comfy - can't put my finger on it.

Off to the shops - take Verity to Bounce and Rhyme and then back to pick up Iris.

Good moaning ladies.

I like the dictatorship theme. Reckon my DH has accepted that it works in his favour - especially at moments like this morning when he was changing A's nappy on our bed and found that the poo had gone all up his back. While he shouted 'yuk, yuk!' and flapped about with wipes, his little hitler wife had the bath running and shouted instructions about how to remove sleepsuit and bodysuit without getting poo on A's head, whisked them away to wash, returned to new shouts of 'He's in a puddle of wee!' so handed over muslin for mopping up, put muslin in to soak and ran back to bathroom to give surprised baby for a quick dip. . DH would have been OK without me of course - nobody would have actually died - but the poo and wee would have travelled a lot further and the whole process would have taken about half an hour...

He loves looking after baby but does prefer it when they get more interactive. I think that's natural - wee ones need all that nconditional love and care at first and if you're b/f there's only so much daddy can do. However, I do think it's essential that men do some nappies and baths etc. even if we can't managed Tee's impressive 50%. Sharing the nurture as well as the 'rule-making' functions helps develop strong and equal bonds between baby and both parents rather than it boiling down to mum being the one who wipes noses and dad the one who gives out pocket money.

JW I wouldn't know where to start with the SW jab. Hope they manage to do some better testing and come up with concrete info soon.

Okay, while it may be 50%, it doesn't mean its an even 50%! DH does do more of the 'fun' things, i.e. feeding and playing. But that's mostly because, as he himself admits, I am just better at other things than he is. He was still home yesterday when A did his morning marathon pooh. I had him wiped down and redressed in about 5 minutes. DH marvelled at how fast I did it. I cannot figure out how it could take longer than that, he cannot figure out how I did it so fast!

But the night time stuff is definitely 50/50 split. It, of course, helps that I could not breast feed. So DH takes nights. Maybe not 50% of the time, actually, but one night in 3 he gets up with A so I can sleep.

Okay so maybe 50% was hyperbole, but its pretty close, LOL.

Ahhhhhh - just had to cancel my debit card as my thieving darling children have been in my purse one too many times and it's disappeared THAT's stopped me spending!

So what does a disclaimer at nursery (re photos) actually say?
I agree, it's all gone mad. I was told off for taking a pic of my nephew ice-skating with my DH (there were just the two of them left on the ice at the time). For Heaven's sake.

It's definitely a 50/50 share in this household but that was always my intention and DP's as well I imagine; for historical reasons as much as the fact that we both work. DP definitely does his share and is a whizz with pooey nappies etc. Sometimes I forget when I last changed one. He also is much more intereactive with D since D started interacting back. The only division is that daddy is more for fun and mummy is for comforting in the event of sickness/teething etc (and reminding daddy that D should have food and not bottles during the day!!)

Oh am I alone in wanting to queue up already for D's SF jab?? There's no great difference between this vaccination and the flu jabs that come in every year. They are rushed through as well since they have to wait until the strain has been identified each season. The technology on which the vaccine is based has already been tested widely - there is no reason to think there will be a problem as happened in the 70s. They would not be offering it to pregnant women if there was a risk - (potentially the highest risk group of all) and it won't have been tested on them either.

If the flu mutates the vaccine may still offer some immunity - but it hasn't mutated yet. I think people who are worried now about the jab may have to reassess the relative risks when it becomes more widespread later.

In your case jw you might be abe to get away with it anyway as the rest of the family will be priority cases to protect K, so if you are all protected and she is indoors there's hopefully a good barrier around her. Anyway if thousands of people get it we will soon see whether there is a problem!

D will be having it as soon as he can (and that's a unilateral decision!!).

I'm back and no long shaking with temper.

Thanks for the unbelievably astute and accurate words of wisdom and understanding JW... I'm sorry you have had the same label stamped on you too and totally agree about the devil and the deep blue sea metaphor.
I was just so furious that he could come out with that when he was positively terrified of fatherhood, and so I shouldered 99% of the burden from day one (he tried giving a nightfeed of ebm for 4 weeks near the beginning but A. got more and more stroppy about it not being the real thing so he gave up and he didnt change a single nappy for the first 6 months!)and I have gone out of my way to make sure he got his rest when I dont work mornings and can, if I'm lucky have a nap (though rarely do).
To give him his due he helped in other ways, he did 75% of the housework and still does 100% of the ironing (I hate that job)and usually does the dishes after I have cooked but 22 months later, after 2 weeks of doing the early shift every other morning to let me have a lay in (after the still obligatory bf of course)he suddenly knows it all! Exactly as you said JW spouting forth when it effects them and their comfort!We shall have a serious, but calmer, chat tonight when he gets home and I shall stop ranting on here and boring you all.

tee all I can say is that you are a lucky woman, you have a treasure beyond value in your Dh....I hope you get out to the market and the tall ships it is too beautiful a day to waste watching telly (says she still in her pjs having just got A down for a nap ...if only he would still sleep in his pram these days [sigh])

JJ your grandads place sounds gorgeous! Enjoy the brick of barra brith when you get it.
I'm with you and JW in the SF vaccine dilemma, it does seem rushed ...rather like the willi-nilli handing out of Tamiflu to all and sundry. The authorities want to be seen to be doing something ..it seems to get less critisism than admitting to being helpless....until something goes wrong and then they claim it was "unfortunate" and "unforseeable"

Right, I'm off to get dressed, prepare meals (chick pea curry for dinner tonight ...its a green day on SW) and when ds finally wakes get some of the fresh air I have been advocating

Hi all

13 days to go.....
The flu jab is a tricky one for me. I normally have any jab that's going but I have decided that at the moment I will risk going without as I have enough symptoms of double pregnancy, steroid jabs, anti-d jabs, blood tests etc....I feel like a pincushion!
I think we may order the twin travel system today and just hope we aren't tempting fate.

I lent my Landrover to my partner this morning so he could help with getting some horses scanned (I am now banned from stables)and the gear stick came off in his hand , I'm not surprised as it is that kind of vehicle. He offered to get me a new one (not new as in brand new but a new old one)a cunning plan on my part obviously........ I will let you know if it worked.
Have a nice day.

MrsB I know, logically, that you are right about SF vacs...My scientific friends can't wait to give it to their son (he has DS and heart problems)but as a hopelessly unscientific person myself, my gut instict says no...but then I dithered about the MMR too but eventually went ahead and had it done ...

Neddie hang on in there..not long now. Which twin system are you going for? Fingers crossed for a newer Landrover...well thought out plan!! ...(FT wanders off wondering if she breaks the gear stick in the Picasso Dh will fall for it too.....)

wooo my brain has gone all strange watching waybaloo, Bs new favourite programme.

MrsB I will be elbowing my way to the front of the queue for the SF vaccine .

We have had the treat of going to Tesco this morning what joy! and then I need to pack this pm cos we are going to Norfolk for the weekend whoopee it's going to be sunny

Well, not a beautiful day here floria totally pouring, but we did go to Farmers Market, which is indoors. Skipped the tall ships, however!!

I do get such fun looks when A is in the bjorn! He slept the whole time we were out, came home, had a bottle and is back asleep...until I put him down...

tee I take it slings in NI are not that popular given that people look at yours? V odd as they've been around for years.

floria oh I know how it goes all too well. At least your DH does the housework which is a great help imho. Mine isn't even that good on the domestic front. He never, ever cooks on the grounds that he can't. He can create a fantastic web site for clients but can't put frozen food on a tray and put in the oven. Anyhoo, I've had all of this out with him over the years and I guess I'll have to like it or lump it as there isn't any other option. I'm trying to think of his redeeming qualities at the mo

He never bathes K. I think he did it once when she was little and I was so traumatised by him almost dropping her that I totally freaked and scared him off. I must hold my hands up and admit I am a bit of a facist if it's not done exactly to my specifications. And tee you changing A in half the time that your DH does it is probably something that is universal to all mums I guess the menfolk will say that they get there in the end

Half my problem is that because K was so tiny and all the rest of what happened, I do treat her with kid gloves and yes, I wrap her in cotton wool to a certain extent. I must get out of this mindset but v difficult when you've seen them almost at death's door. I'll have a word with meself

neddie not long now eh? Will we see much of you once the tins are here? I do hope so

Just waiting on the carpet men pitching up. They said anytime between 12 and 3pm so you can bet your bottom dollar it'll be 2.45!

it's funny isn't it tee you wouldn't get a second look anywhere else - I think part of it is that the North didn't have any immigants for so long they hadn't been exposed to new ways of doing thigs. Although Belfast shold be a bit more cosmopolitan at this stage... guess you will have to show them the way!!

My last word on the SF vaccine - I am a great believer in instinct however you also have to weigh up the relative risks: the risk that there is going to be a repeat of the 70's issue with a vaccine is vanishingly small whereas the risk of an immune compromised baby getting complications with the flu is much much greater. So you have to decide wheher it is worth taking a tiny risk (the jab) to avoid a much greater risk (the flu). It's like measles ony on a bigger scale.

If and when the time comes that every 2nd/3rd/4th person has the flu our preception of the relative risk will change accordingly.

I think what is causing the problem for us all is that because swine flu has a name we think it is a special case with different risks. It isn't really - it is just a flu. It just happens to be a new flu so almost no-one has immunity and therefore it will spread much wider than a normal strain of flu and more people will die. Babies probably die of flu every year, we just don't hear about it normally.

Right, off to get the hair done...

Well, Iris is back - so that's my rest over with!

jw hope you're clapping in excitment at new carpet! That's not raw silk too is it?

hedgepig am very of you going off to Norfolk - have a lovely time!

neddie LOL@gearstick coming off in DP's hand! Sounds like that's not the family car of choice! Just counting down the days now eh?
Is DP home for the duration now?

mrsB don't know what I think about the flu jab - unusual for me - just unsure.

tab our disclaimer was a page long. It asked lots of questions - can we take photos to put on the wall? Can we take a picture and it go to the local paper? Will you allow your child to be photographed by another parent at sports day? etc etc etc.....!!!!

We're happy here at jjtowers as we've secured Speech & Language therapy as from Spet 7th Paed pulled strings and sent forth a recommendation!!! Am cock-a-hoop as I didn't think it'd be possible. Phew! Feel like I'll be getting a bit of help now

I agree about the flu jabs each year and in principle, I also agree that if it worked, then there'd be no problem at all. It's the untesting side of it that doesn't sit well. If this was a jab for measles, chickenpox, common cold etc then I'd still feel the same about it.

I also agree that the risks have to weighed up. This is where I flounder. Of course I want her to be vaccinated against something that, if what I have been told is correct, could be potentially life threatening for her. If I could have a figure put before me to say the the risk is negligible then I'm fine with that. There just doesn't seem to be any firm answers.

Naw JJ Not made of raw silk but of yak hair woven together by Tibetan monks

Great news for Iris' speech & language therapy. At last, some support

sounds comfy under foot JW!!!!!!

yo dudes! Both babes asleep now it's daylight and not pitch black with a tearful mother and a father stumbling round the room trying to give her a break. Roll on Teenagerhood!

(((Hugs))) Bonzo it is hard trying to juggle the 2 isn't it.

Awww bonzo How's it going dear?

Lol bonzo shall I take a screen print of that for when they are actually teens???

HadAHardDayWithSamTiggaxx

Quiz for the afternoon!

Q. How much packing had hedgepig done for the weekend?????

A. Bugger all!
My very short helper keeps trying to eat electricity cables so I have to distract him. He is now trying to climb onto the computer desk, I'm booking my seat a A&E now!