Fantastic 40's Pregnant And Popped !

[johnworf]

Fabulous 40 and over ladies.

If you're pregnant or already popped, come and join our merry band. All welcome for chat, gossip, rants, and top tips!

Ha tee Some of us are still using baby brain over a year after baby has been born......

I wonder when it expires?

Hello
Swellings down a little due to cold showers every 2 hours on my hefalump legs.
I must explain that although I have had 2 children which I have grown quite successfully in a very animal breeder kind of way (good enough for the animals should work for kids)- I have never done 2 at once and I like reading opinions and facts on subjects I haven't experienced. Some things I think GF has got reasonably right others I will ignore but I will use some of it and see if it works- same with washable nappies -I've bought them and I'll give them a go.
My mother grew me up the DR Spock way and I'm sure I am mentally scarred in some manners but I haven't committed a mass murder or robbed a granny yet. I co-slept with the other 2 and didn't care on which side they slept on (back/front or sideways). I cooked dinner with one in sling(not recommended as their feet sometimes get in the pasta sauce)and sat my 18 month old on a 16.1hh stallion in just a headcollar. I just bought the book to see how other people did it. I fully intend to feed both at once as it's too much time-wasting to feed one at a time. Please tell me what's wrong with her methods? I would love to know-this is why I joined MN to get views and ideas from others.
And gossip............

neddie this isn't the forum for talking about the one who shall not be named.

Last time someone did that I think she sued....

OH OOps- I don't want to get anyone into trouble..........I didn't know the unanamed person had sued -I just don't know anyone who's got twins!!! The twin forum is a bit lacking in twins at the mo. (oh you know what I mean....) I'm sure I'll cope...it's just a bit tougher than one and was hoping there was some magic regime I could fall into that would help. I think DR Spock is no longer with us (if he ever was) so we can criticize without fear of litigation.

lol Tee. You can't have a really serious case of baby brain because you are a) planning nice meals in advance and c) cooking them. DH has no excuse though...

Neddie are there any local twins groups near you? Round here every time you see a mum with twins she's strolling along with another mum with twins - they stick together because nobody else understands quite what bringing up 2 the same age entails*. I guess it only works in cities, but hope you get into some sort of network which can give really practical help and support for a very specific set of issues.

Re: advice books - I know several women who became very discontented little mothers in response to some of the stricter approaches . But you're an old hand at the child-rearing business and I see the appeal of reading as much as you can and using whatever bits of it you feel is right for you and yours .

• At uni I knew a twin who finally agreed (with his brother) that they should go to different cities at 18 when they realised that all their friends would call up and ask to speak to 'the twins'. Not a problem you'll have with one of each, I think.

I thought the whole she who can't be named thing happened because she came on for a web chat and people basically told her she was full of it? Not just because people were speaking about her?

I could be wrong though.

Personally, I take all books with a huge salt shaker, not just a grain of the stuff. No baby fits to what a book says. Its a baby, not a computer!!!

But neddie if its helping you, then go for it!

tee you'll see in this article that we're not supposed to discuss her......at all!

Thanks ermintrude but not sure there are many twins in these wilds of Wiltshire here, nor ones that fall into my very peculiar socio-economic group (if you know what I mean)there is a distinct lack of my kind of odd-bod with children here (will search for them). I think they'd recoil in horror at me breast feeding on a bale of hay. Anyhoo DP home in 4 days for 2 1/2 months so he can help and Mum can finally go home [exhausted and patience tried emoticon]

I see johnworf all is revealed- what happened to freedom of speech?

OOooooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOOOoooooopeeks from behind sofa where she is hiding Have we been mentioning Lord Voldemort on here ladies.....?*

In the words of my little Iris...." You're V-e-r-y, v-e-r-y naughty expects thread to be deleted!neddie gosh, it's a hard one - no help at all are we! Two close friends have twins - both boys. One has gone completely non-routine and personally i think it's been a dog's life - although they're happy, healthy, bright and she had another baby when they were just 20 months old! The other is doing mix n' match. She's breastfeeding and discovering one twin sleeps a dream and the other doesn't! However she's finding this is working to her advantage as she's only dealing with one at a time. Sounds like you may have to wait and see what they're like as little people!

LOL@ putting one on a horse at 18mths!

tee hahaha baby brain is indeed a unique phenomena isn't it?! Like the time I lost one of my shoes - couldn't find it anywhere. Then went to cook the girls' dinner and discovered it in the fridge on top of the cheese dish!

Oh is it time for bed yet?

jw thanks for the link! i agree with neddie what about freedom of speech??
i mean, i agree with and have used most of her methods! but i still think that people should be able to say what they think!

anyway, yippeee it is half way through the summer hols! must go get DS1 his uniform next weekend! and name labels etc!

neddie my sisters are identical twins and they're still known as 'the twins'. They're 28

(terrible twins they are too)

I can't believe that she who shall not be named doesn't even have kids. How the eff can you write about childcare if you have no experience?...I'd better shut up now as I can feel me dancing very close to the fire

Thanks for the Nappylady website link. I'll avoid the nappy soak for a bit as that could be causing a problem. As for fleece liners, that's also something I'll have a look at. Thanks for the tip. Made out of ordinary fleece? The type we could make a jacket from? Am I just being thick?

Okay, new mummy question...how old does a baby have to be before you can say 'its bed time' stick them in their amby/cot/whatever and they'll go to sleep on their own? We are still doing the 'hold him until he's asleep method' which is nice, but I imagine will have to change at some point!!! Also, he weighs a lot!!

tabitha I bought half a metre of normal fleece material from the local market. Cost about £1. Cut it up to nappy insert size

tee you can say it from day one but it won't have any effect Babies can't understand commands or instructions until they're about 18 months old. They can understand a bedtime routine though. We start winding down after tea and don't do much playing but we have a story then the usual putting pj's on, a drink etc etc. She knows each evening we'll do the same ritual and most times she'll go down on her own. I say most times.

DH used to rock her to sleep but I think it's a bad habit to get into as they come to expect it. If she cries in the cot I leave her for couple of minutes (but not if she's screaming and trying to be sick), then go in, DON'T pick her up, soothe her and then go out again. This works for me so I'm not saying that you all should do it...far from it!

A is very young though so I think you just have to suck it and see. I would have thought he should have got into the habit of rocking himself to sleep as that's what the Amby is designed for? Or did I dream that part up?

JW I didn't mean to start any time soon, just mostly curious! We actually do already have a night time routine of clean nappy, grobag, bottle, quiet time etc. Sometimes he is completely asleep at this point, sometimes I rock him in his amby. He doesn't move enough yet to really rock himself in his Amby!

Has anyone used Solgar dophilus powder ?? I'm thinking of trying it out but it's a bit dear so don't want to get it if it's no good.

tee agree with everything jw says about routine. We start winding down after dinner. It's all relaxed, sometimes a bath (although my two seem to get VERY hyper after a bath and we've little hope of getting them off) other times it's just reading and the CBeebies bedtime hour!

However I find bed times go far more smoothly when they've had their sleep in the day. Trouble is with not having proper daytime naps is that they get over-tired and that's a mare. Trouble is they are little people...minds of their own....stubborn as mules...ah, the list is endless

tab Yep, ordinary fleece - thin sort. I love mine made from a white IKEA throw/blanket thing!

tee like I said, no hard and fast rules on this one; some will settle from the get go and some (like my older boys) were a pain in the ass until they were around 3. I used to have to lie with them to get them to go to sleep.

You might get lucky and have a settler

Over tired is a indeed a mare.

Cue cranky baby in the corner.........

jw is that the same thing as Acidophilus? Use that and it's great. Basically does what those little milky drinks do.....but don't get frazzled by the time they reach the stomach.

Oh, what are those little drinks called....taste vile???Arrggghhhhhhhhhhh

Gotta go - bedtime routine gone to pot and Verity shouting and coughing..

Neddie I'll stick my neck out and critisise Lady Voldemort - I thought her routines were just too prescriptive. Feed baby at 7:30am, 11:30, 3:30, 7:30pm,11:30pm etc ... and NO WAY ON THIS EARTH can you deviate from these times ( wtf??) or all hell will break loose. I mean - what if you're an evening person and want a lie-in? What if baby (radical thought here) wants a feed early because they are hungry?? Or what if baby wants to sleep longer because they are growing and need the rest? Or what if you have your baby in this perfect routine but then need to go out or do something at 11:30 on the dot?? It just seemed impossible and completely unreasonable to me. And really unfair on the baby. How can someone who has never had children know what it feels like when your baby cries and cries and cries? They can't know the actual phyical pain it causes in your chest so how can they be trusted to say let them cry - they're not hungry they're just being naughty or whatever it is she says when baby wants feeding at 11 insead of half past. Grrrrr. Someone reccomended the book to me when I was pregnant and I was quite shocked that people would actually try and do these things. But then that's me and my opinion. (I did/do BF on demand and have had one contented daughter - who put herself into a routine of approx 4 hour sleeps - and I hope my son will be the same).

Tee I didn't rock M to sleep at all really as that's what my sister did with her DD and was still doing it at 2 years old as if she was put into bed even remotely awake she screamed and screamed. With her second she put him in bed and said "go to sleep" and he pretty much did. I vowed I'd have the second child so from very early I put M into bed still slightly awake. Then she learned to settle herself and if she woke in the night didn't need someone else to settle her back to sleep. It has worked really well and I have to say she is an amazingly good sleeper.

Jw bugger about the tumbledrier. And that North Sea Ocean Colour Orchestra sounds lovely and chilled. Have you heard of the PenguinCafeOrchestra? I love, love love them.

MrsB hope you all start feeling better soon.

Heron I'd go for the food anyday. In London you can walk and look at the views then relax back in the hotel.

Thanks all about the hints for the boy and feeding and sleeping. I do swaddle him already at night upstairs but hadn't downstairs for some reason. I do like the idea of sleeping on his side - goes with what I sort of thought about him startling in a cold-not-mummy shaped bed. It's a pigging nuicanse though the amout he is feeding. Did it again today - fed on/off all day from about 1pm til about 5:30. With visitors ... grrr. Just wouldn't stop and or settle. He's then still sleeping and last night he slept for nearly 6 hours. I can't complain about that bit but I can't cope with M and him if he's going to be feeding like this all the time.

Uh-oh spoke too soon - the boy awakes ......

evening all

interesting - had never read that article before. Don't do routine here at all - don't even do baths every night. I can't see D accepting the imposition of any sort of regimen at all he is very strong willed.

neddie I have to say I don't envy you - twins run in our family and I don't think I could cope - far too idle .

we have two new words today- book is "cooh" and cat is "gat" am very chuffed as I didn't think he would have any words for another year!

and hurrah - we have given up the Battle of the Fleas and are taking delivery of a new sofa thurs and the old one is getting taken away in the morning (we did need a new smaller one anyway I am not totally mad). If that effing cat ever sets foot on the new one HE WILL DIE!! I wish I could get rid of him but have been hearing that there is a 3 month waiting list for cat and dog homes to offload pets due to the recession.

LOL@bonzo Challenging the routine system. So, what we're saying here is pretty much 8 out of 10 of us cats don't prefer it

Awwww, I love my flea ridden cat .... except when she does that thing of running inbetween your legs and making you trip over your own feet, thus almost breaking your neck

Bed. Can't believe I'm still up but been looking online for a rug for Verity's room. I want a huge one - so I can almost cover all the floor space so it'll also act as a sound barrier!

Oh, I think it's a full moon - so I suspect many of us will indeed have strange nights!!!

Night night....