November/December babies

[monkey]

Hell, I've just found out I'm expecting No. 3 mid November, and am very excited. A bit scared too - I can't remember a thing! How can I possibly have done this twice already??? Hope more of you can join me soon!

Thank you everyone. Sorry Mum2Toby if I don't sound pleased, but to be quite frank I am absolutely petrified. There are days when I am ok and coping fine, then days when I scream in my head "I don't want another one!!!" and secretly hope it goes away. But I am dealing with it better than last time so far. It doesn't help that I don't feel any different to normal, no weight gain, no sickness, no nothing. I keep kidding myself that I am not, but I've had no period and the test showed positive, so I must be. I might feel better when I've been to the GP's, but I keep putting it off. I don't want it officially confirmed yet! Anyway, sorry to be so miserable when everyone else on here is happy. Shall I start a new miserguts thread? I think I might and then the happy pregnancies can get back to talking about 'happy' things, like being sick? What IS so good about pregnancy anyway?

Rhubarb - my pregnancy was planned, but not really IYKWIM! We kind of discussed it like "I want a baby"... "So do I"!! It was like discussing whether we wanted an takeaway or not! I did a pg test as a joke one night and it was negative, then did the other 3 weeks later coz it was just sitting in the packet doing nowt and I felt hormonal, and it was +ve!!!!!!!! My first reactions were disbelief, shock, fear, denial.... and loads more I've forgotten about! But I soon got used the idea. I hope things get better for you soon. Maybe once you've had your first scan you'll feel differently??

There are lots of good things about pregnancy (none of them in the 1st trimester though!). Just wait until you hear it's heart beat or feel ot wriggling about.

Another plus was my hair and nails were fantastice throughout the whole pgy!

Should we do the 'what's go great aboutprgnancy" bit here or on another thread? Good question Rhubarb.

Ok, I'll begin with a couple of ideas.
Eating any old crap & not having to worry about the repercussions for a year or more! (This is not necessarily medically sound)

Not being a*d to cook dinner & dh taking over wsithout any hint of complaint.

Not worrying about not having an ironing board stomach in the summer.

A whole week in a fab hospital getting waited on hand & foot, or in some people's cases, friends & family all rallying round & looking after them - I don't get the latter.

Choosing names.

Feeling special.

Anticipation.

Shopping for baby stuff, even though I don't think I coul dpossibly need another thing.

Well, I'm not too sure that there's anything very great about the first 12 weeks, but I really enjoyed my last pg so I am hopeful of enjoying this one assuming I get that far!
Best things for me are:

1. not having to worry about whether I'll ever get pregnant again
2. having an excuse for looking like a bag lady and not having to spend any money on clothes
3. making plans
4. baby shopping
5. When it gets to that stage, having a bump and feeling the movements
6. Its a lot lower maintenance on the inside than on the outside!

That's all I can think of right now!

Everything you've all said!!!

Even when I was so big and uncomfortable I just marvelled at my moving bump and the feeling of ds hiccupping, or getting a fright if a door banged!

Hearing the heartbeat for the first time.... and each time after that!

Talking to my bump and asking baby to hurry up so Mummy could give it a proper cuddle.

....I'm SO broody I could go on all day.... I think my hormones have completely clouded any of the discomfort and also the stresses of having a newborn! >sigh

I forgot - not having any periods for at least nine months! (please god let them not come back straight away this time...)

Good one Elliot!! And also the free dental treatment and prescriptions until they are a year old!

I got my teeth cleaned and polished and descaled..... lovely!

lus I'm an asthmatic, so it saved me a fortune on my repeat prescription!!! Materialistic, but true.

I'm going to start a new thread for this.....

Rhubarb I know from a previous message you had a very traumatic first pregnancy but you adore your dd. Can you focus on the fact you will have another baby that you will also adore? You have experince of motherhood so it won't be as hard - you know you can get through it. Sending you a cyber hug and hope you can relax and enjoy some aspect of your pregnancy.

Rhubarb, my last pregnancy was fairly traumatic (by my standards, not trying to compare my experience to yours) - I was in a newish relationship, was very young, not in a financial position to have a child and felt like the life I'd planned out was crumbling before my eyes. I ended up having to move city, change job, accomodation, social circle etc. After my ds was born though things were quite rosy for a while, to the extent that I was even feeling a tad broody in the last few months. I analysed this though and realised that

1. I was back on track and progressing nicely in my chosen career,
2. I had regained some of my freedom as DS got older
3. Two children are not as mobile as one
4. Young as I was to have one child, I was definitely too young to have two children (I'm 25 now) I realised that I wanted to enjoy my newfound freedom and get to a position of some financial security so that we afford me to work part-time if #2 came along and I was very happy and relieved with this decision. However, I found out a few weeks ago that I'm pregnant. I'm still in shock, it doesn't feel real yet, and I haven't reached the stage of being happy about it yet. But I'm sure I will in time, probably around the time I feel the baby kicking. I can understand how you feel (to some extent, I don't think I suffered as much as you did with your first), and know it's not as simple as the end result making all the previous 9 months trauma disappear. There is a lot of s**t to be sorted first before you can relax and maybe the fact that you know how bad it was for you the last time you can take some measures will help somewhat. I had previously thought that people who are married and financially secure would automatically welcome pregnany with open arms as it seemed to be the ideal to me when I had my ds. I know now this is not automatically true, and I think that you have helped a lot of people by acknowledging this so openly (and helped people like me throw away some presumptions). I suppose what I'm trying to say is that you are justified in feeling scared and shocked, but at least this time it's not so much the fear of the unknown than the fear that you will go through the same hell as last time. And you can tackle this. I don't know what (if anything) helped you the last time, but perhaps being pro-active and lining up any help you might need will assist somewhat. It's much better to fight this thing head on that wait for it to swamp you.

p.s. I hope I have got the right end of the stick here, maybe not in which case ignore all the above

hmmmm, I think I stopped that line of conversation effectively......

back to the subject - I have never felt this nauseous ever! It was a horrible weekend trying to keep swallowing and feel somewhat normal. I was not helped by a sick DS and a partying DP who was uselessly hungover yesterday. I'm beginning to think he doesn't feel that morning sickness is real, b***d.

Hah, am evidently also very hormonal

When did your morning sickness start eefs? Was hoping to join you all on this thread but as I have been getting cramps and dodgy skin, I think it will probably not happen this month. Will know after the weekend anyway....
Hope you are all getting along ok.

Flippa - again, I'm not wanting to give false hopes, but for the first 3 months of my pregnancy I got all the 'symptoms' of menstruating apart from the bleeding. I got cramps and felt sluggish and spotty and had PMT. At one point I thought I was going to miscarry coz of the period pains!!

Eefs - snap - I felt so sick all weekend I could hardly move. I was never this sick with dd. I have also had a continuous headache which does not help. Hormones also kicking in and i am becoming unbearable to live with
Flippa - I felt nauseous from about 3 weeks but the sickness had now really kicked in at 6 weeks. I had stomach cramps for the first 3 weeks and these have eased now. Good luck to you - let us know what happens - hope to see you on this thread soon!

Thanks for your kind messages - have also had lots of headaches over the past week but have been quite stressed at work, so that may be it. Fingers crossed but not holding out any hopes. Don't feel nauseous at all but have been very hormonal.

Sadly, my period arrived this morning but at least my cycle is shorter now - 30 rather than 36 days....won't be joining you guys on the Nov/Dec thread, but hopefully will be setting up a Jan/Feb thread myself!!
Hope you are all doing well.

this might help some of you suffering from morning sickness. On advise from Mears on another thread I got a pair of those motion sickness armbands (avaiable from most chemists). I put them on last night and feel like a new person this morning. I took them off for my shower this mmorning and the nausea came back so they must be working. A nice non-medical way of coping with it.
How is everyone else doing? Monkey, Elliot, Wellid, grommit, sprout, buttercup, WWW, Jaytree, chenalno5? (hope I haven't left anyone out there)

Thanks Eefs- anything is worth a try - I am as sick as a dog and have a chronic headache - hope everyone else feels better than I do!

eefs, I'm OK and feeling a bit more positive this week. I'm still not letting myself get too excited in case anything goes wrong though. I'm 9 weeks now and my breasts are absolute agony. If I knock them against anything accidentally (easily done, I forget they're quite this enormous!) it's v painful. No morning sickness at all though, so that's good. I'm feeling very very fat but I needed to lose some weight to start with, plus giving up smoking has made me eat more I think. Ah well, I'll try to lose it in 2004 hey?! The further along I get the more I think ah well, I can blame it on pregnancy!

Fed up with very negative comments from my mum, sister AND mil about home birth. I said I might go for it (they all asked) and they said things like 'it's dangerous, how could you, you won't be allowed at your age, please don't put the baby at risk'. Which is VERY VERY Annoying (had a successful home birth last time). Might start a new thread actually a bit closer to the time. I will need maternity clothes soon but can't quite bear to spend money on them so am wondering whether my couple of baggy trousers might see me through. Oooh, didn't realise I had so much to say til I started typing! Thanks for asking, sorry if this is extremely boring reading but it does feel better getting it off my chest How is everyone else?

WWW, I can sympathise with a lot of your problems. During my last pregnancy I grew from a "B" cup to a "F" cup. that's just not natural! And it looks like I'm going the same way this time. I have taken to wearing a sports bra/soft bra in bed though, because I find the extra weight really pulls and I don't want to get another set of stretchmarks. As for banging them off something, ouch!
I can understand how fed up you'd be about those comments about the home birth. The implication is that you'd put the baby in danger to get your own way, which frankly is a load of (and a bit unfair to you).

Grommit, poor you. I was feeling sooooo horrible until yesterday, throwing up, constant nausea, tiredness and I conviently caught a cold from my son, so nicely stuffed up too. Seriously, the armbands have helped loads.

I felt awful the last few weeks: non-stop nausea, migraine-type headaches, bloated... And the sea-bands didn't seem to be making a difference, apart from giving me bruises on my wrists (glad they're helping you eefs). I've felt so much better the last few days (starting week 10) that I'm now totally convinced something is going dreadfully wrong and my hormone levels are going down. I keep squashing my breasts to see if they've shrunk again... Paranoid, moi?

Thanks for asking after everyone eefs.
I'm at about 11 weeks now and seem (fingers crossed) to be over the nausea. Just feel tired and emotional all the time. Have had so many rows with dh over nothing this week, and then keep bursting into tears. Hormones eh, don't you just love 'em!

Eefs - you can tell your family categorically that homebirth is a very safe option and that actually, it can be safer than a hospital birth!!! A very good book to read it 'Safer Childbirth? A critical history of maternity care' by Marjorie Tew. Published by Free Association Books. Third edition published 1998.

It gives an excellent account of maternity care ovet the years. Marjorie Tew is a statistician who has been able to demonstrate that the evidence that medical staff used to persuade women to have homebirths was inaccurate.

Have your homebirth with confidence.

Hi everyone - Had booking-in appt with midwife this morning, she was very friendly and helpful. Due date is 13th Nov (have checked in diary that it's not Friday The 13!) Get early dating scan at 12 wks here. Also, as I had a PPH with no. 3, I get lots of extra antenatal visits, which is good because I'm still a worrier despite it being no.4! Feeling a bit achy now, so trying to take things as easy as possible.

Best wishes to everyone.

Chanelno5 - this is number 4! Don't know how you manage - how old are your other 3? Good for you!