The sequel - Fab, Sparkly & often Moany 40 + : Preggie or New Mums - come say Hi!

[jeanjeannie]

We've now filled up the last thread - and the two before that! Seems that there are a lot of us old girls out there getting ourselves into trouble

So - if you've just found yourself to be with child or have a LO and you've hit (or about to hit - we'll let you sneak in just under the radar!)the big 4 0, then come say Hi!

There is always a spare comfy chair - plenty of cake and many old ladies to listen to your moans! Think of the lovely ladies knitting shreddies - only we're not sporting a blue rinse, but wearing cashmere and kitten heels

Hello regular ladies. I avoided putting FAT, F*cked or Knackered in the title - tempting as it was

lilibet I paid £180 for the nuchal and bloods. Cheap at half the price for the reassurance it gave me - I had excellent results and had no further thoughts or worries about Downs during the pregnancy - and no need for amnio either. I didn't realise you could get it on the nhs in some places - you can't here.

Lilibet At 39, I think I am the baby! I'll be 40 in February.

btw I am 40 but others are older on here lilibet.

My turn to ask for advice - re a feeding problem that we are having and that seems to be getting worse; during the day D will start taking his bottle happily enough then after an ounce or so he will begin screaming, squirming and refusing it. He never does this at night. He used to do it once or twice a day now it is at every feed and is very frustrating. I don't think it is wind but wondered whether it might be acid reflux? He behaves almost as if the milk is burning him but like I say, he never does this at night.

Any ideas ladies? I know most of you bf but this might not be an exclusively ff problem...

mrsb Mmmm, sounds like classic reflux...which can happen to BF babies too. I FF Iris (bit of BF but nowt after 5 mnths) and she got this around week 10.

I think JW may be able to enlighten you as I think Katherine had/has it. We got given Gaviscon. Didn't need it for long - temporary problem.

Some people swear that changing the bottle helps. It didn't for us but maybe worth a try. Which one are you using? Could try one with an air valve thingy in case it's to do with air in take. It's horrid though....have a wave of sympathy fro me \////\\/// (that was meant to be waves!)

lilibet Nah...we had a lady who gave birth the other month and she was 49!!! She won.

I'm 43 with 2 under 2.......late starter Can't remember how old the others are...sort of early - mid 40s....I think

thanks jeanjeanie might just take him to the doctors and see if we can get gaviscon or whatever - I take it that it needs to be prescribed?

The North wind doth blow and we've just had snow!!!!!...well...more like sleet and it only flurried for about 5 mins...but JJ you (and the met office) were right.

MrsB; Alex hasnt suffered what you are describing (he is bf)but it sounds very like what one of the girls on my p.n. thread went through, though for her it was worse at night and yes it was acid reflux...baby gaviscon prescribed by the dr helped, as did putting the head of her cot on blocks to tilt it. Hope your dr can help you too.

lilibet Wigan!Another Northern lass! I'm under Lancashire health authority (though I was treated at Manchester St Marys because of a genetic problem I carry)and last year nuchal tests were not free, (though mine was, but I only had the scan part as my genetic problem would fudge the blood tests)My consultant originally told me that I would have to go to Leeds for it and it would cost about £100. I was offered both cvs and amnio tests for free....this time I refused them, took my chances with a good nuchal result, worried for the rest of my pregnancy but was fortunate to have a perfectly normal little boy ...incidentally my odds of having a child with Downs have always been 1:3 (that is the genetic problem I was being monitored for)factor in my age, 43 at the time, and my odds were very high.But Alex was worth the worry...and I'd do it again at 44/45 without a second thought if only my Dh would agree and my dr approve.

Ah floria what can I say....once my weather COCK (cheap excuse to say a silly word) gets a'twirlin and my veins start to play up then you can count on my weather predictions Met Office have missed a trick with me!

Oh that must have been a worrying time for you. My odds were 1 in 2 for Downs and about 1 in 5 for Edwards........we just HAD to know - although, we definately hadn't decided what to do with the info. Hard one - and always up to each individual.

Can't say we've ruled out another......there, I've said it. And I'd be about 44 - 45 if we did. Need an extension mind you....MMmmm, could be worth it for that alone

That is the on thing that is fretting me. What do I do if the baby has Downs or Edwards?

Guess I won't know until I'm faced with the decision!

tee you are right - it is something you can only really know when you have to face it - although in my experience once you get over that one you will start worrying about something else ... welcome to motherhood

jeanjeanie thanks for the advice (and sympathy - it is v upsetting when they can't feed) I- have ordered some of those airvalve bottles. Also as the LO sleeps in an Amby nest at night I wonder whether that prevents a problem at night as his head is tilted.hmmm

quick post (sewing night - cubs badges)

I have sachets of Infant Gaviscon for K. It sounds like reflux mrsb. Get if from your GP for nowt.

Try rolled up towel under his cot mattress in the daytime to keep him tilted upwards.

I use closer to nature with the easy vent multi flow teats.

All well at eye hospital and K passed with flying colours. Not back for another 3 months. Tick

ttfn xxxx

bbl

hi there

Just to say hello to all you over-40s ladies.

I am expecting my second baby, am 44, and had my son at 42. Nothing to do with building a career or anything, just that didn't meet big love until I was 40...

Would be keen to hear if any of you so-called older mothers managed a VBAC at a ripe old age, as I am wondering what to do come APril/May.

tee I agree with mrsB.....you'll worry about the Downs/Edwards situation....then move onto the next thing. It's natural. I think the thing is to try and get it all into perspective. The odds are very slim (even over 40)...and often the way in which they are relayed sound dramatic.

For example if you're told you have a 1 in 5 chance of something happening it tends to sound much worse than 20% IYSWIM.

mrsb I reckon the airvalve things are probably worth a shot. Ah - you have an Amby nest - they do look nice. Fancy an adult sized one myself

jw how did it go today??

I have a HUGE spot on and sort of inside my nose AND it's painful. See - I knew I was run down! *dives into box of choccies that are knocking about!

OOoo - X-posts.

JW fab news - they don't call her special K for nothing Sewing night? That's odd - I'm sewing too....a little drawstring bag to pop onto Iris's teeny push-a-long pushchair. It's so we can collect things and take them home!! Do feel free to join me in squinting to get the cotton into the needle

goldenpig HELLO, WELCOME & CONGRATS! Gosh - you sound like me....I didn't meet love of life till 39 (2 weeks off 40 tee hee) and 3 years later we have two DDs under two

How many weeks are you? And how are you holding up with a toddler running about?

Have to say I had another c-section but i think that you'll be needing hedgepig for the VBAC. She managed it....clever girl! I'm sure she'll cruise by and be able to let you know the ins and outs, as it were.

hedgepig where are you? How's the feeding going? Are you holding up? Would you like some CAKE!? x

MrsB Dont you just lurve the Amby? I'm sure that is why Alex didnt suffer colic at night. I'm still sad he decided at 9 months that sleeping on his front was the future. I wonder if feeding him in a more upright position might help until the new bottles and gaviscon arrive?

JJ Yes we worried (dh more than me)but the genetic thing also causes 50% of my embryos to be non viable so in 3 years of trying I had 4 early mc that never achieved heart beats, 1 mc that had a heartbeat at 8wks but had died by 12wks, and my 6th pg had a good nuchal at 12wks, but the amnio at 16wks having just come back clear, triggered a previously undiagnosed bloodclotting condition and I lost her at 17wks. Though we had been determined not to bring a disadvantaged child into the world, when I got pg with Alex you can understand my reluctance to test again, I had got to the point where having a child no matter what the problems was better than losing another healthy baby. But I was lucky...very,very lucky. You can understand why dh refuses to consider another.
I can't believe that with the nights you are suffering at the moment you are considering no.3! but totally understand the maternal urge, addictive isn't it?? You go for it!

Thanks jeanjeannie - I am 12 weeks, and my 17-monther is not quite walking, so things not too bad, although I do have less energy (is this age or pregnancy, I wonder...) than a few months back.

I think I will probably have to have another section too - all fine, was just worried about the lifting of toddler during the six weeks post-birth - what was that like? I look after my son full-time, so that kind of scares me!

Blimey floria that's all a very tough call You and your DH have really been through it.....crikey, I didn't realise. You'll be more than horribly familiar with odds being spouted at you. How upsetting and stressful.

Yep - there is something strangely addictive about it all...........depite the lack of sleep! I'm often glad I'm not ten years younger...........I'd be constantly preggie!!

goldenpig My DD1 didn't walk until 3 weeks after DD2 was born and it was a relief!

She was a little bit prem and her legs and feet turned inwards slightly so we knew there would be a delay but as i got bigger it was getting harder to pick her up off the floor!

My section c-sec was really quick to heal - thank goodness. I got DP to be around for the first 2 weeks and every morning made sure everything I needed was downstairs so I didn't make loads of work for myself. Meals for DD1 were frozen and just heated up for the day and I basically did as little carrying as poss. It wasn't easy, but not impossible.

Didn't drive for 5 weeks - that wasn't easy. But the weather was ok so we just went for slow walks!

I noticed that once DD1 was walking she didn't want to be carried anyway - horrah!!

Thanks jeanjeannie - I guess having had one before, it made it all a teeny bit easier, knowing how to cope.

It's funny, I had a false positive the month before falling pregnant and was feeling all determined to try for VBAC, but in reality, the chances of them letting me go for it are slim, with borderline HBP and other medical stuff going on.
As long as the baby is OK, I care less about my suffering!

Well I'm afraid K is my very last child as I've now done both ends of the spectrum; young mum and old mum. So that's it. No more. All done.

Floria I'm really sad to hear of your previous heartbreak. Gosh, I only had one m/c and that was bad enough. Can't even begin to imagine how you were going through all that

I had no tests with Katherine so am unable to join in that debate. No other reason but blind ignorance was better than knowing anything bad! Yep, I'm an ostrich.

K has swallowed 7oz in an hour and is screeching for more. Think we're into growth spurt time....and she's still sleeping through the night, which is marvellous!

Eye man was happy with her progress and her vision is as good as a normal term baby atm. Not back until Jan 09 which is fab.

I've ordered some baby books from Amazon today; faces for baby, white on black, black on white. Mentioned them to the eye man and he said they'd be great for her. I didn't tell him I'd also ordered some Baby Einstein flash cards in case he thought I was a crank. But I have. And I probably am [hhm]

As for parallel sewing JJ how odd is that? I wonder if we're in synch? That would mean that you also are walking like John Wayne today IYSWIM?

No - not walking like The Duke jw

Isn't Katherine 5 months old today? I know there is supposed to be a surge at around the later part of 4 months....that's what I've been hoping Verity's sleepless nights are all about

I've got a black and white face book - V loves it. Really gets a response out of her. She's particularly vocal at the moment...lots of parrot-like screaching Clearly she'll be an early talker, prolific reader and pass her Oxbridge degree with a first. Oh sorry, I thought I was on some of the other competitive mums threads here for a moment

Sorry - meant to update yesterday. Did PG test - seemed to be in Ladies loo at work for an eternity - but test was negative! Not sure what to do next ... still no period - so does that mean menopause or something else maybe sinister? I was actually disappointed!!!! Which was a little disconcerting I must admit....

Portofino I got a BFN first test I did. Left it a day and did it again and got a BFP. Make sure you're past your usual start date before re-testing.

K is 5 months old today but not in 'real' terms. She's still 6 weeks old developmental wise. They take from her due date of 14 september for all things developmental and nothing at all actual age apart from her jabs.

I can see Verity playing chess age 2 and being some kind of child prodigy which would explain the lack of sleep...she's thinking! Glad that someone else has got the black and white books and that I'm not alone in being a crank

Haven't had a period for a couple of months and they were a bit scatty before that. I think I had one in July but not so sure about August (probably) and definitely not September..... I know I had 2 in May as we moved house then! DH tells me I should make a note of these things and I know he's right but stil.....Maybe i will leave it a couple of weeks and see.

JW Fabulous news about special Ks eyes and her appetite! I so envy the sleeping through the night .
Thanks to you and JJ for the empathy, truth be told I wasn't much fun to be around each time it happened and after losing Robyn (not what she would have been called if she had gone to term but the first name that popped into my head when I delivered her)I really was not terribly nice, but Alex was sooo worth it and I really would do it all again if they could promise me the same perfect result.

Goldenpig Welcome I hope, like Hedgepig, you get your vbac but as you say so long as you both come out healthy it doesnt in the long run really matter if they need to use the sunroof.

Portofino sorry it was a bfn but as JW says you may have caught later than you thought. (fingers crossed for you)