anyone else pregnant with loads of kids already?? feelin bit judged ngl

[Chattymum23]

hi all not sure if i should post this but here goes

i’m 8+4 with baby no.5 (all boys 😅) n tbh i feel like everyone thinks i’m a joke. haven’t even told half the fam cos i know what they’ll say. last time i told my mum i was preg she rolled her eyes n said “again?” 😔

i know it’s not ideal but it’s happened now n i just want to be happy bout it. i love my kids loads even if life’s a bit hectic

i’m knackered n got sickness bad but still doin school runs n sortin all the meals n tantrums. nursery called again yday bout my 4yo n i just cried in the loo after

anyone else got a biggish family n feel like ppl look down on you? not after a row just want to feel a bit less alone

You are right, my parents did not struggle to provide for us. We were certainly more privileged than many. My view is for sure coloured by this privilege

You have four children with a partner who doesn't even live with you--and another on the way? I'm sorry, but that sounds like a terrible situation for you to be in. You're only working part time and he's not even supporting you in the home with the children you share.

I can understand why your family is concerned. Wanting a big family and being responsible and fully prepared for a big family or two very different things.

Your children deserve to present, loving parents, and you deserve a supportive partner. Your gut instinct that this is not the right time is a solid one. It sounds like you've got significant issues around living arrangements and major financial challenges to sort out before you make any other big life change. Supporting multiple children on a part-time cleaning job is not realistic. And if the children's father is not living with you, it's unlikely you can rely on him for consistent financial support, let alone emotional support. How is that a partnership? Is he even the father of your other children? If not, are those men in the picture?

There is a lot of context you failed to share in your original post and it certainly sheds light on while your family is probably not thrilled to see you continuing to have children. Being a good mom means ensuring your children have a stable home life with consistent caregivers and enough money to provide for the basics, at bare minimum. That's what I would suggest you work towards now.

WHAT?! So her children don't deserve to have a present and loving father figure unless he's their own blood?! What you're saying is completely absurd and flies in the face of the success that millions of stepparents, adoptive parents, foster parents have had in building loving blending families for many generations. Such incredibly backwards and deeply flawed thinking. Delete the comment while you still can. Goodness.

From her other threads (if real) op is very much on her own. The existing children have two separate fathers neither of whom bother much. The father of the current pregnancy doesn’t live with them either. It all sounds very hard and pretty miserable. The decision to bring yet another child by a third absent father into this scenario is quite baffling.

That's why you use contraception but she couldn't be bothered with that.....

I don’t think this scenario is a positive one for the mother who sounds miserable nor for the children. Why support that? First thing women do when they get freedom and education is limit their family size.

Thank you Venus7 for your support and reply and i will look at Popuation Matters

Glady ou care as well

Best Regards

😻👍🌻

You should have focused on your education.

You have no idea if there is more than one father, or whether he contributes from the information that the OP has given.

Please go read her other threads. There's multiple deadbeat dads.

I'm afraid she has written all about the dire situation in other threads, moaning that the two fathers of her existing children are useless and mostly in the pub. This child seems to have a different father.

I get that you're trying to be supportive to someone in a bad situation but let's not pretend any of this is a good idea.

Not at all; my pleasure.
I love your user name, by the way!

This !

What confuses me is lower population is better for the environment yet apparently is worse to the economy as few tax payers yet the graduates now are struggling to find jobs due to AI so surely fewer people are needed anyway? If anyone knows the answers let me know!

I do take your point but saying 'We basically need the feckless to stop and the tax payer, to procreate' plus removing benefits amounts to plain Eugenics which is exactly what Hitler tried to do : create a super-race with supermen and superwomen breeding colonies set aside for the purpose. His plan involved elimination of weaklings too which is what removing benefits amounts would do . Doesn't it all depend on who is going to make decisions on all this. History and logic go one way but ethics and morals the other.

I know single parents who don’t work with more kids than that.

I am trying to be supportive because I can't see the use in casting judgement on someone who is already pregnant. If she was saying "I'm thinking of having another baby, what do people think" that would be different.

Don't listen to the negative people. If your happy and the kids are happy and taken care then enjoy your life. Becauce no mater what it is there are always going to be people who enjoy tearing you down. Maybe you could find a mom's group in real live to get some support

They’re not happy. She’s said so on other threads.

You should have concentrated on getting an education. Five children, one father... or more? A cleaning job? What are you doing with your life? Even worse, with those children's lives?

More helpful shut the door after the horse has bolted comments.

I'm begging at this point for one of you to tell me what you think the benefit of these unwarranted comments are.

It's not too late for OP. Her youngest is about to start school. Perfect time to work on herself if she doesn't have another baby.

People make mistakes, things happen. When your in that situation its hard to just get rid of it. My point still stands, there are ways of replying to someone without being hurtful and rude.

Good points TheaBrandt2 Don't know what the answer is.

But l do have an old degree in Computing and Infirmation Systems though l can barely use a mobile phone.

AI is just finding its baby steps at the mo and has only just hit towm.

It will be really taking off soon aong with robotics etc.

Have been reading up on this big time for a while

Don't want to sound like a Doom Monger and Merchant and pray for a good future. But all ll l can say is

Be afraid. Be very afraid.!!!

🤞🙏😻

Perhaps let the OP reassess her choices, and not repeat the same mistakes in future?