May Babies 2025 - Thread 3

[Toothfairy0113]

Thought i'd start a new thread as the other was full

@SnakebitesandSambucas I had to google CAT therapy. That had some interesting results 😂 I think I’m possibly needing the perinatal service (although where I am they’ve massively let me down in the past) but most certainly some medication. I was on sertraline to deal with hormonal impacts during pregnancy but I weaned off before birth as for me I felt I didn’t want her having any withdrawal. I’ve been on cloud 9 until week 11 and then suddenly boom! So frustrating 🙄

@SnakebitesandSambucas haha yes baby is the contraception 😂 I'm nowhere near ready for anything yet and I don't think hubby is either. Just don't know what to do. I've always had the pill, can't bear the thought of anything being put up there as had enough of that during the pregnancy.

@Poster57 I did mention vacsectomy to hubby and I don't think he's keen on that. I've always had the pill.
I have had some struggles lately and do have tablets from the GP, but haven't taken any yet.

Roman was supposed to have his first set of jabs today but he’s too poorly (he has a cold & a fever) so they’ve been rearranged for Saturday instead.

@Rainbowsunshine81 I’ve started taking the pill today. I’ve not used hormonal contraception for ages but just really cannot face another pregnancy for a while 😂 DH will be (attempting to) use the pull out method too to further reduce chances of accidental pregnancy. We conceive really easily and had a pill pregnancy before too (which turned out to be ectopic) so we can’t be too careful!

@Poster57 if you think you need a bit of help don’t put off seeking it! Sometimes it’s not situational and simply a little imbalance that can be rectified. Our bodies go through so much with pregnancy, birth & BF. Hormones are all over the place! I feel much more settled this time round but was in a bit of a pickle after having my first.

@microwoods I think you’re right. I’ve had the resurfacing of stuff that was dealt with long ago for literally no reason at all so I think it’s a bit of an imbalance rather than situational. Hormone movements and me don’t mix. It’s not easy being female! I’m so scared of it lasting and missing fun times with my kids whilst they’re so little which to be honest doesn’t help as I put so much pressure on myself. Hopefully can be rectified quite quickly.

I did try to start exercising more this morning in the hope that might help. Wow I’m unfit 😂

@SnakebitesandSambucas copper iud is hormone free but can have its own issues. I’ve got endometriosis so it’s tricky for me Just depends if it works for you :) my current plan is abstinence also 😂😂

I had the copper coil for 3 years and my periods were a little heavier but all in all it was fine for me.

I just went to the gym for the first time today too! It was so nice to get in the pool loved swimming I’ll defo be doing more swimming. i tried to jog a little and that was not comfortable at all so I just stuck to low impact work out

@microwoods I've been today to get the pill, it's been a long time since I've taken it. I don't think we'll be having any more babies, got my two boys and it took a long time to have our second baby Luca.
@BrightGoose I've never had the coil, always when on contraception has been the pill. The pharmacist did mention the coil to me today. I like going swimming, haven't done that in a while.

Tbh I could barely tolerate a smear and the only internals I had were the scans 3 in total. So chance of a coil for me. I also can't have certain contraceptives as blood clot risk. Plus I've had enough chemicals would like a break! @Poster57 yes I know I've probably spelt it wrong lol. @microwoods no more babies for me finally got my third miracle. I've been pregnant 15 times so my body needs a bloody rest. @Rainbowsunshine81 yes long journey as well. I love the fact that I can walk out of the hospital knowing I had some happiness in the EPU and labour ward, there's a special room called the willow room for labour if the baby has died 😢. It's away from the main ward. But you can hear when the door was opened.

@SnakebitesandSambucas same for me as was in the hospital a couple of times and I walked past the epu and this time it was a happy ending as I'd had some not so happy endings there, was nice to know that I won't have to walk past there anymore. In the hospital where I was on the delivery suite they have a room that is used when you have a baby that has died and then there is what's called honeysuckle lane where there are rooms that those who have lost a baby, the baby can stay in one of them.

Has anyone’s periods returned ? I’m due to start in a few days and the pms is kicking my But! I forgot just how much it affects me

anyones baby having/had a growth spurt at 19 weeks ?

@BrightGoose my periods returned at 9 weeks PP even though I’m EBF (they did last time too!). I’ve started taking the pill though so I don’t know how that impact things! X

@BrightGoose I had my first post partum period two weeks ago, was quite heavy. I've recently started taking the pill and like @microwoods don't know how that will affect things. X

Does anyone else feel like "What Have I Done??"

I am feeling atrocious. We should never have had a second DC, we are now shit parents to 2 babies instead of decent parents to one.

I feel so sorry for my little boy that he's getting us as parents. I spend all my time trying to get him to sleep so that I can rest and my partner has almost nothing to do with him at all.

We are both almost constantly having a go at our toddler as well.

The house is a fucking tip.

@TheBeesKnee I can relate to feeling like I’m constantly having a go at the toddler! DD is seeking our attention a lot and it’s manifesting in some undesirable behaviours. It’s hard because I know that she is just communicating a need to me, and I need to respond by giving her more attention (not in response to her being naughty!) but I do not have the capacity! I’d love to take her out for the day just us, but so far I haven’t managed more than a hair wash away from DS as he is a bottle refuser.

I try to get 1:2:1 time in with her by doing her tea/bedtime when DH can watch DS but if DS is unsettled it’s hard. My DH isn’t able to settle DS yet. I feel like every moment from waking up until they go to bed is spent giving my full attention to their competing needs. It can be pretty draining! I have found the easiest way to manage them both is to just sit on the floor where I can play with toddler and baby at same time.

All I’ll say is, this period of time is so temporary. You are definitely not shit parents. It’s exhausting. Neither child will remember any of it. Make it easier in any way that you can (even if that means turning on the dancing fruits for hours 😂). Getting out seems to make things easier, especially if it’s with people who can help out a bit. I love going to my mums because my family make a fuss of DD and it’s the only place that I can snuggle with DS and not be feeling like I need to put him down so I can crack on with the cleaning/washing etc.

If you think your feelings are more than a standard overwhelm, have you considered if you have PND?

@TheBeesKnee awe I’m so sorry you are feeling this way! It is 100 percent worth it when they start playing together and fighting, helping each other out and loving each other even my son who has asd adores both his sisters he just shows it differently to each of them. It is so difficult when they are little and you don’t get a break until they are asleep. Defo worth keep trying to grab those moments with her also they are so young they will not remember this .. mine are older so we have to tread more carefully but when they are toddlers and babies they don’t care if the house was clean or that they ate the same food for two days. Everything is temporary and each stage brings its challenges but it does get easier. My middle one DD is also being a pain and is just constantly wanting to do stuff go somewhere eat crap and throwing the most mighty tantrums I’ve never known her like this she definitely need school and a social life to make her function properly.
my house is also messy and I’ve half given up until they go back to school, the hoover comes out once or twice a week downstairs and bath rooms cleaned .. the mess in the toy room and bed rooms are just being ignored 🤣

Oh @TheBeesKnee it can be so hard. I found 1 to 2 difficult. I’ve found 2 to 3 far easier yet this is the time I’ve ended up with ppd. go figure 🤷‍♀️🙄 how many weeks post partum are you - I’m ebf and was fine until my hormones hit a change at about 11/12 weeks which was unexpected.

Hi all same here with the hormones and feeling awful. Maybe it's the adrenaline running out but I'm feeling so tearful. The summer holidays aren't helping. And injections tomorrow so will be a interesting day. Still breastfeeding as that's fine now. But he's a super velcro baby and hates the pram with a passion. The sleep deprivation is getting to me now. 🥺

Does anyone’s babies have a lip tie? And what was your experiences ? I think my little one does but I don’t really know what they look like

@SnakebitesandSambucas I've thought the same about adrenaline! I was in such a high for weeks.

@Poster57 reading Mumsnet while feeding. Tongue tie can't always be seen @BrightGoose anterior / posterior but it's easily diagnosed. My little boy was checked twice under NHS very quickly. But you can do a private one. Feeling a bit better after a bit more sleep. But definitely sliding into ppd / PPA.

@BrightGoose my wee one does, but it's so minor they aren't bothered about doing anything.
It can be quite common to have a lip tie along with a tongue tie, which again my girl had. Her tongue tie was rectified, but it was posterior, it took a few doctors to actually notice it

@TheBeesKnee how are you getting on? X

Thank you for following up and your lovely original reply.

Sorry, I didn't mean to trauma dump and vanish. My toddler's nursery is closed this week and I've been just trying to survive and get through the day. If this week has taught me anything, it's that I am not cut out to be a SAHM.

I don't know if this is PND, sometimes you're not depressed, things just really are that shit.

DP took a day off on Tuesday as emergency carer's leave and said that I looked more relaxed and less stressed that day 🙄 I spend a lot of time fantasising about us separating so that I can have a break every other weekend. He's got a lot going on himself at the minute and honestly I just think we had a baby at the wrong time. Now we must plod on, but I'm baring the brunt of it all and having little to no time to enjoy it.

It's fucking relentless, isn't it?

Thank you for your kind message @BrightGoose I need to remember that there will be positive days in the future.

@Poster57 he's 16 weeks and I'm ebf too.

@TheBeesKnee hormone wise that can’t be a coincidence as I’m also 16 weeks and ebf. I so wish they knew more about women’s health and had any idea what our hormones were even meant to be doing right now 🙄

Anyone else's baby going so e kind of 3 month crisis? I know the BF one. But my little boy seems to only be happy outside. As soon as I'm home he refuses to be put down! He's literally going purple with rage! He can be smiley but these last few days he's been so grumpy!