Due February 2025 - Thread 5: IT'S TIME

[UrbanSquirrel]

Creating this as a space to continue the Feb 2025 chat - quite frankly it's all starting to feel very, very real right now!

@MyHappyNewt sorry for slow reply, yes we got one through Friday for this Monday, what about you?
My sister in laws a GP and she babysat yesterday so she actually checked his eyes herself and said she's pretty sure she can see the red light reflection. So I'm hoping it's OK and just a false alarm which is common as they don't hold still enough to look. Hope is the same for you!

We are 10 and a half weeks and are having to move up to the 3-6 month clothes! :)
Started shopping around nurseries although I'm not back in work till next year. I'm sure the time will fly though...!

@SBelfast thats great that you have the appointment through - will be thinking of you today! Still no appt for us yet…the gp was pretty blasé about it at the time, saying that it’s probably nothing and to contact them if we haven’t heard anything in four weeks. But I’m really hoping it’ll be sooner than that so I can dial down the stress a bit!

We’ve also got hip and allergy referrals in the mix as well. She was shown to have immature hips on an ultrasound so we have a rescan for that and then is also suspected cmpa - not so fussed about that as her brother was too so have done it all before! It’s just cumulatively quite a bit to deal with 😬

Gosh you have a lot going on @MyHappyNewt so fingers crossed this turns out to be nothing.
His eyes checked out OK today so no congenital cataracts, the doctor was able to see the red reflection in both eyes. She did a separate referral to a different team in a few months to check vision development as he fell asleep and wasn't able to check ability to track movement but she didnt seem too worried about. They had to administer eye drops 15 mins apart (2 doses), then look at the eyes. They sting slightly when first administered. Ruairí didn't seem to mind much although he was moving around a lot when they were trying to look at his eyes so they uses sucrose to distract him. They asked if we used a dummy which we don't currently but would have been a good distraction if we did. Anyway hope you get your appointment soon and it's also nothing to worry about, and good luck also with the other referrals ❤

Happy to read @SBelfast youe baby seems OK with eyes. And yes fingers crossed for your little one @MyHappyNewt . May I ask, how did you find out your babies had these issues? I mean, is there any other routine check up?

Btw, is there any other Health visitor appointment after the 6weeks? I haven't heard from mine since quite a long time. 🤔

@Piluka my baby and I had a joint post natal/birth appointment where we both got checked over. They ran through standard baby checks that included things like hips and eyes. I think they also do a lot of these checks to baby before leaving hospital as standard. I know Ruairí had his as part of his discharge so your little one probably has had some checks already.
Health visitor I'm not sure, last time we saw ours was probably around 6weeks and I think from memory she's out in the next couple of weeks which is around 3 months. After that it maybe jumps to 6 months and then a year.

@Piluka my HV is coming back at 12 weeks. Not sure after that. Do you have a number you can call if you have questions?

Thanks @QuantumPanic and @SBelfast i was wondering if it was something between the 6w appointment and the 12w. Mine is going to be 12w next week and HV hasn't mentioned anything about a visit. Good to know.

We haven't got a 12 week appointment, HV said to me they have an optional 3-4 month appointment or you can contact them if you need them. They also have local drop ins a few times a week.

Hey! How is everyone doing!
I currently have a 10 week old who feeds every two hours (big feeds), including in the night and doesn't stay down for very long 😳 Is this just me? What am I doing wrong? X

@Hhdxx oh gosh! You must be totally exhausted 😥
Has it always been that way? Are you breastfeeding? Could it be a mad cluster feeding session, or if breastfeeding maybe milk supply?
Your not doing anything wrong! Every baby is different and your just having a very challenging time of it from the sound of it! How are you managing it? Got any good shows to watch when your feeding? 😊

@Hhdxx the frequency sounds normal to me, how long are the big feeds? Are you EBF? That sounds so tough 😞

What would we be expecting from a 10 week old in terms of feeds? HVs have just told me feed on demand and at the last home visit was checking he was feeding often enough through the night (that was at maybe 3/4 weeks though).

Mine is coming up to 10 weeks and has been feeding more frequently in the day but smaller feeds, maybe every 1-2ish hours, but he's started going a bit longer at night, like a near 4h stretch 8/9pm to midnight ish, and maybe another 3h stretch later.

DH takes him for about a 4 hour shift with expressed milk which has made a huge difference to me, idk if that's an option you'd be open to.

Little one was also born really small, just above low birth weight and has always fed lots. MIL keeps trying to get us to give him formula but he's gained weight so well (gone up seven percentiles) and nappy output is still great.

@Hhdxx was yours fussier after the vaccines? Mine has been a lot clingier, wanting to feed lots, way more dirty nappies a day. Had a sleepless night where he refused bottles and wouldn't stop crying unless I held him 😭

@Hhdxx Also 10 weeks here and yes, feeding every 1-3 hours during the day and every 3-6 hours at night. Sometimes she only feeds for 10 minutes a side, sometimes for 45 minutes...she likes to keep me on my toes. 🤷 Feeding more doesn't necessarily correlate with sleeping more, either. It's all so random - I guess things are changing very rapidly at this age.

The baby book I'm reading recommends trying to space out night feeds incrementally - if the baby wakes or cries, try settling back to sleep rather than immediately offering food. The goal is to delay feeding by 10-15 minutes each time with the idea that you'll be able to build on this and eventually get to 4h+ between feeds.

Also @Hhdxx just came back from seeing the HV and asked about frequency of feeds, she just said as long as baby is feeding at least 8-12 times a day, nappy output is normal and gaining weight as expected, it's nothing to worry about. She also said baby might be feeding more because the weather's warmer and he wants a drink, or for comfort as well. She also said he might be having a growth spurt.

I know that doesn't go to how that impacts you through the night (because mine is starting to feed a bit less frequently at night she said it's normal for him to feed more in the daytime, and for an evening cluster feed getting ready for nighttime stretch) but I found it reassuring especially as you asked whether you were doing something wrong - I'd had comments from family about mine feeding a lot recently so wanted to pass it on!

@SBelfast we finally had our appointment today! Everything was fine - the consultant said that the GP had probably picked up the reflection of the optic nerve.

@Piluka it was picked up at the six week check by the gp. She said that she wasn’t sure what to make of it so referred on! The hip thing was because she was breech/transverse which triggered the referral. Her hips are also fine!

@SBelfast @ridl14 @QuantumPanic
Thanks so much for all your advice. He mainly has bottled expressed milk now so husband is able to help out but he still wakes every 2 hours in the night too. He doesn't drink the same quantity during the night. I just don't know what to do as every single person I've spoken to or know is having at least 3 hour stints which honestly sounds like a dream right now. I'm finding it so hard. Hubby can't get him to burp during the night so I get woken up with grunting and straining from trapped wind. X

@Hhdxx that sounds so tough but it's great he can take the bottle to give you a break!
If he's taking less during the night could it be he's still waking up so often out of habit? I read somewhere about trying to settle first instead of feeding if you think there's a chance its not hunger. Also about trying to stretch out the breaks. I'm not sure how that works though.
Have you spoken to your doctor or health visitor about it?

I'm sure you've tried everything for the wind but we use infacol with every feed and I find it helpful. Our sons also on lansoprazole for reflux. Honestly it took about 3-4 weeks for that to start working but it's been great now it does. I didn't give it to him one day and could see such a noticeable difference with him being poorly again.

We are just over 14 weeks and in the last week have went to 8/10 hour sleep stretches. Before that he'd still have me up a couple of times for feeds but I noticed was hardly taking anything so then I started just trying to resettle instead of feeding which only worked 50% of time but he's somehow switched now to just sleeping. For now of course I'm sure that'll change! People keep talking about a 4 month sleep regression!
Also I've found with him holding his head up much more himself and moving about the winds a lot easier to come up/out. I honestly couldn't picture the day when these things wouldn't be massively stressing me out. It'll get easier soon and you can give yourself a big pat on the back for doing so well under challenging circumstances :)

@Hhdxx just saw some reels on Instagram which have made me worry my babies sleeping too long at night this early and also were completely opposed to the advice I'd read above, and made me nervous haha. I guess always best to speak to health visitor/doctor for advice in the first instance :)

Hi all, sorry haven't kept up to date with all the posts.
But wondered if anyone can help, my baby is seemingly not liking the taste of her formula, she gags and sticks her tongue out, pushes away the bottle but will happily drink water!!🤦🏻🤦🏻🤦🏻
Any ideas what I can do to encourage her to drink, we've tried distractions, waiting longer between feeds etc.
But bcos she won't take anymore after burping she's only having 3oz max, she should be having way more than that now as she's 14wks😬

@OnePinkSloth that sounds really frustrating!
Only thing I can think is have you tried charging the teat size up? Maybe she's struggling to get the slightly thicker formula through the newborn sized hole but not having the same trouble with the water so looks like she prefers that?
I hope you get it resolved soon! And that she's doing well other than this. Xx

Thanks @Onthedouble123, she's already on size 2 teat, tried the 3 and it was far too fast for her.

How is everyone? Just wanted to ask for any advice on sleep, I find the whole thing so confusing!

Atm I'm doing a bedtime routine (bath, story and feeding to sleep, holding then transferring after 20 mins), trying to put him down for the first nap of the day and trying to limit naps to 2 hours.

It was going pretty well with some hit and miss, then in the recent heatwave I was putting him down in just his vest as his swaddle sack and sleeping bag were both 2.5 tog (have a 0.5 one now). He just would not be put down, was waking as soon as he touched the mattress. He's just had the 3mo jabs as well.

His bedtime routine went better last night but still takes him ages to go to sleep. The last couple of nights when I got drowsy I was letting him sleep next to me (safe seven and DH watching on the monitor). We slept so much better this way and I loved it but worry it's making a bad habit.

Anyone having any luck with more independent sleep and a velcro baby?

It 'could' be 4 month sleep regression when babies sleep completely changes, there's loads of different theories and solutions as to how to help so definitely have a look around but essentially it revolves around them needing learn to settle themselves back to sleep.

Babies sleep changes so often it's hard to manage but I recommend taking a look online at what is suggested to help, personally i like Just chill mama and her advice/help.

We had the same issue once she reached the 3mths. Eventually, she settled down but then started with kicking and moving quite a lot during the night. I thought it might be the 4mths regression but kicked earlier? It might be the same for you? We're heading to the 4mths and not looking forward for it. 😔😢 But thinking that at some point it would stop make me feel better. There's light at the end of the tunnel.

Ahh, we are swaddling her at helped her to a) stop moving so much and subsequently, helping her to rest more as she wakes up less often. I don't know if would help you with your baby....

Thank you both! That's true actually, I was putting him in a Love to dream swaddle sack before the hot weather and since then have been using a sleep sack (just holes for the arms). If it stays cool enough I might try his swaddle sack again and see if that helps. I've just noticed he can roll onto his side by arching his back in it though he's not near rolling yet when he's awake.

@elb1504 can they settle themselves back to sleep at this age? We let him fuss a bit before picking him up but I thought we'd have to wait until he was old enough for some gentle sleep training

We've just swapped from the love to dream to normal sleeping bags too, as she's showing signs of rolling so wanted to transition earlier and luckily seems to have gone well with a few nights of change, I wouldn't personally go back if you've stopped using them although id do anything for a good night's sleep!

We've been trying to get her to self settle from quite little, I don't think there's any age to try and encourage it just the earlier the better. Everyone has their own views on sleep training etc.. but it's been good for us this time round, my first couldn't self settle for a long time which was fine but did disturb his sleep.