Social services referral?

[Kat140]

Hi so I had a midwife’s appointment today and she said that she has to refer me to social services because of my age, I’m 16 years old and will be 17 having the baby. I’m just wondering if this is true as it’s never happened to anyone I have spoken to that has had children younger than me?!
May I also add that I have no involvement of social service and never have nether has my baby’s farther and when the baby is here she has no threat to harm agains her and will be well looked after.

SS will just want to check you've got support around you.
At 16 you can't hold a tenancy, so they'll want to know you've got somewhere to live.
Benefits re unusual at this age, so would want to know you can support the baby financially.

You haven't mentioned about the Dad, was there anything you said to the midwife that may have given cause for concern in regards to him?

Midwives aren't regulated to assess external support etc. but I wouldn't be worried if you've got the support of family etc!

Yes, rather surprised that people seem to have missed that. I guess they’re too eager to have a debate about the age of consent. 🎣

It isn't because they think there is any problem, it is so they can offer you support if you require it. Young pregnant women might find that their family are not supportive and they are without a home or money to raise a child. Be open minded and listen to what they say. It is one of these moments where you will realise that the needs of your baby come first rather than you. If your mum is supportive have her with you so they can see your baby has a loving family around them.

So you are wrong in what you posted?

Where did I say “loads” 😂😐

A quick google tells you that you are wrong

Anyone younger than you isn’t a woman. They’re a child, as are you

Actually, calling the OP a child - especially when she is pregnant - is incredibly rude, and factually incorrect. The OP is 16, and is a young woman.

Things may of changed since I had my eldest op, but when I also was pregnant at 16 & dd born at 17. I didn't get referred to SS but like I said may of changed since then.
But also.. Congratulations!! Being a young parent does not mean you're any less of a parent (although you'll always get the stupid people who make comments and stare) you can be the best mum whatever your age ❤️ my dd is 14 now & we have a lovely relationship xx

At 16, I imagine they would want to know if you have the means to support yourself and the baby. Where will baby live / where is your income coming from.

No the farther of my child is also 16.

You did choose to have sex though. Social services don't know that you have support around you until they check so that's why they will be involved.

oh goodness sake.. talk about picking hairs... i ammend my statement, 16 you can consent to sex, however, legally you are still considered a minor! which is why social services have to be involved. that was purely the point i made so get off your high horses.

if you want to pick apart what i have said i really don't care. the OP has asked why they are involved, and thats why they are involved.. they can support her, her partner and her family, they can help with housing, equipment and also financial things.

There's NO "grey area". The age of consent is 16. Such young people ARE considered minors until 18 but you were wrong with your first post.

This is absolutely the normal procedure where I am, and once baby is here the family hubs run specific sessions for young mum’s to provide extra support if needed. It’s as much for you as it is for your baby, you’re still legally a child yourself and so this is to put in place any extra support you might need. It’s really nothing to be scared of OP (although I know it might feel scary for you).

I’m on maternity leave currently and one of the mums at one of my baby groups is 17, she’s been open about the fact there was SS involvement during pregnancy but just a brief meeting and then another visit near the end of pregnancy, they signposted her to relevant support and she’s then had more regular health visitor checks but none of those have been negative. It’s simply because as you are still so young yourself there is always a higher chance you are going to need more support in raising a baby, try to look at it as an opportunity and help being made available.

They’ll also look at where you’re living and if it’s suitable, can help support you in council housing if needed etc.

What you said was that if the father was over 18 then the law had been broken. That’s not splitting hairs, it’s telling you that you are wrong. You didn’t “ammend” you statement at all.

You went on to say it was a grey area. It’s not

Hey @Kat140 :)

There’s a few reasons why the authorities get involved when young women your age get pregnant- to check you haven’t been coerced or abused in any way, but also to ensure you have support/ a plan to continue your education until 18, that you and the baby are adequately looked after, have a home etc, as you’re too young to hold a tenancy. They also have access to pots of support etc that you might find helpful.

I get that it’s scary but honestly, they will just want to make sure you and baby have all you need in order to thrive :)

Two 16 year olds having a baby and you are confused as to why SS are involved?

You are both legally supposed to be in education or training unless you are both working. How are you supporting this child? Universal credit?

It sounds very sensible. They will be able to to provide you with support.

And they would also be referred to social services.

That is correct but those women/girls will also have some support from social services.
It's a bit different in someone under 16 because they need to have a legal guardian.

Please don't fear social services - they are there to support you & your new family & ensure you get access to everything you are entitled to in terms of benefits, education, housing etc. They really aren't looking to trick you or try to take your child away.

I had my eldest when I was 16. It was terrifying & like you I felt everyone wanted to take control away but actually they really helped me get back into education & I got access to a lot of extra support.

I'm actually really glad I had mine young - we have a fantastic relationship & have similar interests. I had a much better experience than friends who had theirs 15 years later.

Good luck with it. I'm glad you found mumsnet & hope you find the boards & topics helpful.

The farther is the same age as me, we are both working and saving money for now until the baby is here. We have a safe place to live and a very good support system around us, I think just the thought of having social services involved before my child is even born scared me a little and in a way I just wanted a reason as to why they would need to be involved. Probably should not of posted on here as everyone would rather hate than give some advice 🤣🤦‍♀️

This isn't the kind of social services referral which you're probably associating it with, there are different teams within the "social services" label.
This isn't a safeguarding report which a team involved in child protection will do, its a support request, so you will be assigned a social worker who is trained to sign post young people to resources to support them.
There are other forms of social workers that plenty of older women access such as disability social workers who support mums with disabled children to access support in a similar way.

Its just an automatic referral because of your age 🌺

well technically... if an over 18 is having sex with a minor, you will find the law has been broken! but obviously you know better.

the OP asked why Social services were to be involved.. the midwife told her why, and this is why? poor girl wants advice not picking apart

That was nearly fifty years ago!