Social services referral?

[Kat140]

Hi so I had a midwife’s appointment today and she said that she has to refer me to social services because of my age, I’m 16 years old and will be 17 having the baby. I’m just wondering if this is true as it’s never happened to anyone I have spoken to that has had children younger than me?!
May I also add that I have no involvement of social service and never have nether has my baby’s farther and when the baby is here she has no threat to harm agains her and will be well looked after.

16 may be the age of consent, but you're a child, and younger girls than you having babies are also children, even more so!

It's not a problem at all. You're the only person who mentioned it.

@HaddyAbrams no I’m not. You did

Congratulations on your pregnancy OP 💐

Are you still in school?

I do know how girls in schools who’ve had SS involvement and so perhaps it’s if you are aged 16 or under.

Honestly, I would take whatever support they can provide.

If you live at home and your family is supportive then I doubt they will be involved for very long.

My biggest advice would be for both of you to try and continue with your education, even if it’s an apprenticeship.

Babies are expensive but they cost more as they get older and so it’s easier to have less money now but work towards a better job for the future.

It’s very uncommon for 2 16yos to live together though and I wonder if this is part of it.

Why does your bf live with you?
How long has he been living there?

Of course they have to be involved.

At 16/17 you are supposed to be in full time education. How are you planning to have the funds to house, feed & clothe yourself and a baby? You'll be reliant on others whether thats parents etc. They need to assess your living situation, consider whether its appropriate for both you & the baby.

You are also more vulnerable to mental health problems, poverty and other issues as a young parent who hadn't completed education, and social services can help support you and ensure you access services that can help you & your child.

You have nothing to worry about if you have a safe place to live and good support network. Because you legally can't provide the basics for your child on your own they just need to check that someone is supporting you with those things (housing for example).

It's good that social services are checking. We would all rather they check on 100 woman who don't need them just to find the 1 that does.

Focus on yourself and your baby and everything else will fall into place.

No, you’re just plain nasty. There was no reason to bring up the spelling, it was rude and entirely irrelevant.

@Rosscameasdoody its very relevant considering this person should be in full time education

Is this an ironic post? She's 16 not 13 she can claim child benefit for her own baby. I became a mum at 16 too and I'm still with the father today.

You are surely joking not all young parents are the same

It is standard procedure OP - please dont worry.

They will simply make sure you are accessing all services available, that you have support and point you in the direction for any benefits you may be entitled to.

What an idiotic thing to post!

Also - you do realise contracteption can fail sometimes don't you. God help your daughter if hers does!

Its for support and nothing else
it will be a good thing as opens up other groups for mums at your stage so you will have more support
social services will be able to help you with any money / housing issues if that was to arise or are required

its a blessing please dont worry

@Frenzi it’s not idiotic at all. One of the most sensible posts on here

Reported!

Fml what a vile post

Social worker here. It sounds like the midwife is referring you as a child as opposed to your baby. She cannot make a referral for support for your child without consent unless there are safeguarding concerns. Based on what you are saying, checks may be made and you might be signposted to support for young parents. Try not to panic, they will want to make sure you are well supported.

Plenty of girls at my school had babies at 15-17 and they have turned out just fine my cousin being one (at 15) - she is also still with the dad !!!

we are now 25 years on and some said having their baby that young was the best thing that happened to them !!!!

Thank you

No need for the part about spelling. There are plenty of supposedly high earning middle class people posting on this site that can't spell.
Does it make you feel good to criticise a 16 year old for her spelling. Well done you.

Ah yes, doesn’t everyone remember the spelling test they took during childbirth.

🙄

I just wanted to wish you all the best. It's great you have plenty of support and I'm sure SS will just want to help and point you in the right direction for support.

I has friends thar became mums as teenagers and they did an excellent job and provided great lives for their children with help from their families.

Well MN clearly didn’t agree as they’ve deleted it. And this person is in work as well as education, or did you skim past that in your hunt for spelling mistakes ? Your post was unhelpful, rude and totally unnecessary. But then you knew that when you posted it.

@Kat140 Massive congratulations!

Please don’t let this thread worry you about what’s ahead of you! I had my first at 16 so yes, fell pregnant at 15. I didn’t have any referrals however would have grateful if I had.

Take any help which is offered.

The hardest thing about being a young parent is the judgemental people who imply that you in some way will be less of a parent. It is not true, unlike some older parents I have met, a lot of the hard parts (sleepless nights etc) weren’t as hard as I was young enough to cope. Also parents often struggle to cope with the loss of freedom, which I never did (didn’t have any to start with lol).

if anything my DC drove me to better myself, I have a degree, a good job, my husband of 20+ years (still madly in love with btw) has his own buisness and we own a very lovely home. Was it hard yes but progressing in life always is! We are in a far better financial position than most our age who waited for the most advantageous age to have children. Both my DC’s are grown now and didn’t become a teenage parent as statistic implied they would. We both have such an amazing relationship with our DC’s and alot of energy to do fun things with them.

Being a parent at any age is hard but you’ve got this!!!

Would also like to point out to some of the judgemental posters that OP is not a child and in some parts of Uk could actually get married!

@Rosscameasdoody my post was 100% accurate. Unfortunately you can’t tell people facts just in case the facts hurt their feelings which is pathetic. The only other comments displaying common sense were also deleted. I’m not sugar coating anything for anyone particularly someone who is about to destroy lives. You go ahead and tiptoe around everyone. Ultimately you’re not doing them any favours

My daughter got pregnant at 16 and she never had a SS referral.

Her HV was dire though so bypassed her and just used a baby clinic when she wanted an update or had questions.