May 2025 Babies

[BrodieKD]

I have just found out I am expecting baby number 2 and my due date is 1st May.

Has anyone else found out they are expecting and looking for some company?

❤️❤️

I feel like I have a mild hangover today. 5 weeks 3 days.
Legs felt a bit wobbly after doing some minimal hoovering and feel a lil foggy headed and hot in the face so sitting down again.

Anyone else got a complicated situation with their own parents?
One thing I'm excited about regards becoming a mum is meaning I'll have a family again...
My Mum is an abusive alcoholic, the only relationship we have is negative. Thankfully we live in different parts of the country.
I haven't seen my Dad in years as he moved away with a new partner and said he couldn't really keep in touch with me as I didn't like his partner. He also told work colleagues 'kids are only your priority til they're 16'(!)
When my partner and I first started discussing potentially trying for a family I asked him in a whatsapp conversation if he thinks he'd enjoy being a grandad,
"no"
I said what an odd response and he said he's had enough of having to look out for or after other people, call him selfish but now he's just focussing on himself.

So yeah. Sadly this little one will have no maternal grandparents, and that makes me sad.

We lost my husbands Dad a few weeks ago too unexpectedly, so there's just one grandparent left, his Mum. Who we are already a bit concerned about and my husband has said we'll have to be firm with her as she's very much one of these women that's thinks she's always right, her way is better, etc etc...

I have no siblings either so I really feel like I'm gonna be lacking that family support.

@Beckatha it is not an easy family situation. Does your partner have any siblings? You can never predict how people will react to pregnancy or becoming grandparents/aunts/uncles etc. Plenty of people have better relationships with friends than with their family. Do you have a good reliable social circle ? It does not have to be big to be perfect for you 😊
I did not see my mom for almost 20 years and only got back in touch with her in the last 2 years, so we're on a sort of acquaintance level and my dad and sisters live in another country so I don't get to see them much.
Think about the little family you and your partner are building and only bring people in it that are worth it! Maybe your little one will be calling your best friend "aunty" 😀 Hope you have the support you need through friendship.

@Beckatha I'm getting a bit dizzy and hot at times too! Currently trying to work myself up to get to the gym this evening though..😖

Sorry to hear about the passing of your husband's Dad. Hopefully your MIL will surprise you and will be able to make up a bit for the lack of family support - will this be her first grandchild?

I don't have a particularly close relationship with my dad (lives about 7 hours away) and my partner doesn't have a great relationship at all with his either and they hardly speak. He didn't have an amazing upbringing and has never acknowledged his mistakes with my partner, but we know that he'll try force involvement and want to arrange visits on his own terms etc. (especially as it will be the first grandchild in the family) which will be awkward!

X

@Loute02 Thanks for the words. I have a few in my social circle, but not a tonne... I relocated from my home city and never really found my 'tribe' here. Plus being self employed made it harder to make more friends, which is hard enough as an adult haha. But yeah...got a few.
My partner has a much younger sister, they live in another city too. But yeah, I'm excited to start out own little family...

@PinkPombear1 Yeah I've felt a bit light headed too, also not managed the gym haha. I did a pilates class last week but didnt this week, too tired. This evening the mild cramps are back.
MIL - yeah it'll be her first grandchild.
Families are complicated eh!

@Beckatha I totally understand the family thing, although im extremely close with my mum and MIL they are both fab although took a long time to get her to stop interfering but now we put boundaries in place so you never know after a few months your MIL might be a good support!

I have no contact with my dad due to emotional abuse he put us though as kids, I have little contact with my older sister as well! My older sisters wedding is in May when I have to come face to face with him.
I can only imagine how my pregnancy announcement is going to go down to be honest I will be accused of getting pregnant to ruin her wedding, I’m extremely anxious about how the whole things going to play out!

Nice that you have two maternal figures there though :)
Yeah I don't know if I'll even tell mine, no family member should be any less than super happy for you and if there's people that wont give that response then i'm not sure they deserve to know

@Beckatha you've got lots and lots of support here! It's a safe space x

Thank you. Yeah it's been good to join the forum this week. I do wish people could have avatars over here tho so it was easier to keep track of who's who haha :) x

@Beckatha it took a long time with my MIL I won’t lie it was hard and we had points where I thought she wasn’t going to be in the kids lives but we got there! Hopefully your MIL will understand it’s your baby your way! Just make sure you stand your ground!!

if they aren’t going to be happy for you then it’s not worth even telling them!

The two threads are starting to confuse me 😂 who's setting up the private FB group 🤭

@Dullblue1234 good shout! I joined one for
my last baby and still talk to the girls in a WhatsApp group 3 years on...
I think it's because the names are so similar too 😂

@BrodieKD I'd offer but I'd probably get the settings wrong and expose everyone 😂😂😂 much more of an insta kinda gal

A fb group sounds good, I'd do it but I dont wanna step on any other toes as that must have been something from the duplicate may babies thread!
Unless you just meant do that instead of talking here, not that it's been mentioned in one of the threads!

https://www.facebook.com/groups/547154594315361/

I've just named it 'May 2025' for now incase it shows anything to anyone and they can see our thumbnails as being members to our friends or that (but the group itself is private)

Another link incase the above didnt work
https://www.facebook.com/groups/2025maybabies

I had a Facebook group for my little one and it was an amazing support, I'll definitely join this group once I've announced as don't want friends and family seeing I've joined yet!
I haven't contacted my midwife yet either, we can't do online referral so I'm just going to wait until I'm closer to the appropriate weeks for the booking appointment

its private :) no one can see it not its members or content unless they're a member, cant even see the group without the link either. I havent announced either so wouldnt have set it up if people could see hehe

@Beckatha sometimes if someone joins a group it comes up on your timeline even if the group is private. (Says "name joined the private group")
I only know this as a friend got caught out when they joined a private elopement group on Facebook and it came up saying the name of the group and how many members it had, you couldn't see the members or it's post but can see they'd joined it and the title of the group

I can’t access the group on either link 😬x

ah mustn't have been a 'hidden' group! As that's a separate setting to also being private :)
Also, I've only named it 'May 2025', not 'mums to be' or anything :)

I've created an invite specific link, hows this
https://fb.me/g/2vnd77r0s/E0alIBW6

I’d have gone for something like… “Cross stitching” 😂

haha, I just made sure it's a hidden group and private ;)

It's there anyway if anyone wants to actually join now I've set it up haha 😅 It's both a hidden group (only those with this specific invite link can access it) and private (only members can see who's in it and the content)
fb.me/g/2vnd77r0s/E0alIBW6