Due July 2024 - part 4

[Oatmilktea]

The other thread was filling up so thought I would set up a new one!

@Sophie3003
@ceruleansky
@Amberellaella
@wannabe123
@glasshalffull0
@Morningcoffeeaddict
@missmoosh
@Jess725
@AnonymousXXIX
@Busyhedgehog
@Nocoffeenotalkie
@justanotherlaura
@Honeymint
@Savvy21
@hopingfor23
@chilliflakesmum
@ExpectantEs
@AimeeLou84
@Welshgal85
@TooHappyToday
@Bali200

I’ve tagged people from the last few pages of the previous thread, hopefully everyone makes there way over here when the other one fills up!

@Oatmilktea those costs are just totally nuts :o you and the baby would be in debt for your entire life. And what is the alternative, you just all die?! My brain is struggling to comprehend, just speechless.

Had a tour of the maternity unit here at my 32 week scan and they apologised it wasn't as nice as the last hospital I gave birth at (which had just had a million pound renovation). But it's free and it meets standards, what more do we really need!

@AnonymousXXIX I know, I couldn’t believe it! Someone asked what happens if you don’t have insurance. Apparently they would still treat you, bill you then you’d need to file for bankruptcy. Which is just crazy! They also only get 6 weeks (unpaid) maternity leave. Awful!

Yes I suppose for the amount of time people actually spend there it doesn’t really need to be all singing, all dancing!

@Oatmilktea oh yeah I was at an international work event last week and everyone was astonished by the amount of mat leave we get to take in the UK. All my American clients are completely confused about my work schedule the coming year. Meanwhile in the UK I keep having to justify the fact that I "only" take 3-6 months! HR is completely unable to cope with how to arrange cover for that period.

Also ladies, I am at the nesting stage where I am now contemplating cleaning my bins. I can't stop. Someone send help 😂😂 Do you think it's any sign at all the baby might come on time/early? (Previous one came a few days late so fully expecting the same this time.)

@AnonymousXXIX
i had thoughts of spraying down the outdoor wheelie bins the other day 😂

I literally can’t wait for Mat leave to start so that I have time to declutter and deep clean my house! I even dreamt about it last night 😂

Hahaha we actually have hired a cleaner, I am disabled anyway so it’s been lovely not having to do a weekly clean. But now I’m staring at my doors like I must scrub them clean! 😂😂 so there with you in manic nesting stage lol

I have so much clearing out and getting sorted to do, it's making me antsy it's not done but need my husband to be off work to hope me with a lot of it!

Oh, I have a cleaner… 😂

@Amberellaella hahah nothing quite compares to a deep clean done yourself to be fair! But as ours just started a few weeks ago, she’s doing a deep clean more or less every week to get on top of the house for us! Costing us a small fortune but figured I would rather it done and I’m physically not capable. The DH does clean but let’s just say he was clearly never taught how to growing up lol 😂 it’s always half finished drives me bonkers!

Wow @Oatmilktea that is a pricey birth! I had my son in a European hospital in 2015 (cesarean) and it was paid for by my health insurance - but I saw the receipts on my account and it amounted to about €16000, including the stay afterwards. Think the cesarean itself was 10k.
Uk does get amazing maternity leave but Germany gets even better - and any company you're working for cannot let you go within 3 years of giving birth! Dutch maternity leave, in contrast, is atrocious. Babies are in daycare here from 3 months old. Most people work part time though and if they're lucky have grandparents to do a few days.

I'm lucky in the sense that I've been able to wfh since Jan. I've got 6 months maternity and 6 months to work from home after that. I only have to go into work twice a week after 1 year, that's common for everyone in my company. So I plan to stay at this company until my baby turns 2 at least..

@Oatmilktea
How's your hospital stay so far? I hope everything's good in terms of you and the baby..!

@Oatmilktea - yes I remember this from when DS1 was born early, he had 8 weeks in nicu on top of a three week stay and emergency section (plus all the medication) and the bills the US ladies with similar situations were getting were eye watering! I think we’d have lost our house at very least trying to cover the costs!

@AnonymousXXIX your American colleagues will be jealous of your mat leave! I couldn’t imagine having to leave a wee 6 week old baby to go to work 😭. I lived in America as a child and I’m glad I don’t live there today!

@Cherubs4 thats a lot of money! Thank god for insurance. I dread to think how much I have cost the NHS throughout this pregnancy.

@ceruleansky me and baby are fine thanks. Hospital has been uneventful (which I’m glad of). I’ve been getting lots of visitors which is nice.

And yes to a cleaner!!! As soon as I knew I was being admitted to hospital, I arranged a cleaner. My partner can keep the house tidy enough but his standard of clean isn’t quite up to mine. It’ll be lovely coming home to a nice sparkling clean home! We will keep the cleaner on for the first few weeks but will need to let them go after that as it’s SO expensive!

@Morningcoffeeaddict oh it will have been well over $1million for them probably! It’s awful that people lose their homes etc over something that’s completely out with their control!

We kept telling our American colleagues to have their babies here, if they intend to get pregnant. My colleague has been on maternity leave for a year now and is about to return. Her DC needs hearing aids and is another reason for them to try and stay and not return to the US anytime soon. They are also planning to have DC2 quite quickly.

While the maternity support was OK in the UK (when I had DS), I've been way more protected here in Germany. I've been signed off on full pay for months. My insurance is covering it because my job is considered too risky for the baby and for me at this time. (It's quite normal for people to be signed off quite early, though, for all kinds of reasons.) I'm starting my official maternity leave next week...also on full pay for the first three months. It automatically starts at 34 weeks. In the UK, people thought I was a bit precious for starting at the same time. (It fitted well with half term and handing things over.) Staying at work until you're practically having the baby pop out in your classroom seems to be the preferred option for lots of people.
I'll stay off for 12 months, DH for 4. We both get paid for this time and the pay is quite close to my monthly net income, if combined with child benefit. That's for the entire time, not just a few months like I had in the UK.
In theory, I could stay off for three years and my employer would have to give me my job back at the end. Two of those would be paid (although at only half the rate I'm getting for only one year).

We also visited our local hospital to have a look. They only have two-bed and one-bed rooms on the postnatal ward. In the UK, there were 6 of us in a room. I left shortly after the birth, while it's common here to stay in for at least three days.

All of it is covered by my medical insurance. They also offer extra money for additional treatments in pregnancy (think it's up to 500€) and lots of support for after the birth.

I think the US system is crazy.

I've already done my sorting and deep cleaning the thought of having to do it in the last stages makes me feel exhausted i learnt from last time though will no doubt be doing extra nesting soon but I have zero energy in the evenings 😂 I already have a cleaner every week and there's no way I'm getting rid of her 🙈 I'm so ready to finish work I have 10.5 days left but I wish it was tomorrow

@bringmearainbow how many weeks are you now? And how exciting so close to maternity leave! I’m finishing on 12th july so ageees away yet haha!

@missmoosh my DH hand washes things that can go in the dishwasher and leaves hand wash only things to ‘soak’ so I gave up on him re: cleaning years ago!

@Amberellaella 😂😂😂 oh no! To be fair I’m terrible for a let it soak approach and the DH is too. Our kitchen can get very messy! In fairness to him when he cleans the kitchen he is very good at the kitchen side, he just ignores the dining room side of it, so it’s like half the room is done 😂

@missmoosh and @Amberellaella I cannot wait until we get a house with space for a dishwasher 🤣. Husband will wash up but again no wiping of the dining room table etc. Bless him he is pretty good when I get him to do jobs on his days off 🤣.

@missmoosh 35+4 today it's going so blooming fast. I've got last week of June off as holiday plus some half days as I have appointments for the hosp then mat leave starts 1st July 🙈 I'm hoping baby stays cooking until then because I have plans and a schedule 😂

@bringmearainbow we must have similar due dates - I'm 35+2 and I finish on the 14th June. I've got afternoon tea with my mum and a hair cut booked in for the first week of my mat leave so hoping baby stays put for them!

@wannabe123 yes we must have 😍 haha I am getting my hair done too 😂 might even book my nails in 💅🏼 my toenails look atrocious atm 🙈 anyone having a baby shower? I've got mine on Sunday I missed it with ds as we were all in lockdown 😢

@bringmearainbow I remember feeding last time and getting so fed up of seeing split ends so have made sure to get it booked in as a priority!