Pregnancy after loss support

[Hopingrae]

Hi ladies, I've recently found out I'm pregnant again after 2 losses in a row. I'm very lucky to have a DS and I had another MC before I had him. So 3 losses in total. I'm only 4+4, but got faint positive 11 days ago at 9dpo and it feels like I've been pregnant for aaaages but time is moving so slowly. We've booked an early scan when I'll be 8 weeks exactly so waiting it out until then, and hoping nothing happens in between. I wondered if anyone else is in a similar position and wanted to share this early journey with me. I've decided not to tell anyone this time round, a lot of my close friends are dealing with newborns or their own ivf journeys and I don't want to add any load to anyone. But it feels like a huge load to me so would love to share with someone!

Good idea! I'll give them a call :)

Amazing to see a wee heartbeat. In some ways it's made me even more nervous as I'd completely written this one off! Counting down the days until the next one now. I can't wait for the first 12 weeks to be over if I get there!

Hope everyone is doing ok in keeping the anxiety down

Congrats on the BFP! Keeping the anxiety down is bloody hard - it seems to come in peaks and troughs for me.

Best thing in my experience is trying to keep bust with things that aren't pregnancy related.

This is a really supportive group and you'll often be able to find people who have been through the same things as you - best of luck with it all x

@Confusedandtired90 @Anxious30Something welcome, and congrats on the positive tests!
No advice I’m afraid, im 9+4 and not learnt how to squash down the anxiety yet! I had an early scan at EPU at 7wks, but the reassurance only lasts a short while.
I just try & keep busy, and try telling myself I’m doing everything I can and there’s nothing I can do differently to affect whatever the outcome it is. Doesn’t make it any easier though!

Hi everyone.
scan went well for twin 2 but twin 1 is slightly ‘young’ as they put it to do any of the testing, so back in Thursday at 10. Feeling really lucky that they have let me go back in to check everything’s ok but was looking forward to a break from the hosptial. Slightly nervous that twin 1 wouldn’t have got to where they need it to be for the scan but they’re the experts so hopefully will be ok!
got to hear their heartbeats for the first time ❤️❤️
Third baby is still there and going to talk more about tests Thursday!

feeling more positive overall though!

@Confusedandtired90 I’m so sorry I don’t know what that means! I second @30somethingttc and would give them a call (or maybe start a post asking if any sonographers on MN can help?)

@30somethingttc It’s great you’re feeling more positive and despite the frequent hospital trips that they’re looking after you. Fingers crossed for Thursday 🤞

Welcome and congratulations @Anxious30Something, I’ve had two MMCs and I think the anxiety is par for the course, but have taken solace in the idea that very little I do can affect the outcome of this pregnancy and it’s already written in the DNA of the embryo. I don’t know if that helps, but it made me feel better to feel less responsible for the outcome

Hi, can I tentatively join please?

I had a miscarriage at 6+2 a month ago and I tested positive yesterday - decent lines and 2-3 weeks on a digital. I spoke to midwife who said considering I had negative tests after my miscarriage and my repeated bloods showed my levels going down, then this is most likely a new pregnancy.

My head is a little scrambled. I keep thinking maybe it’s just retained products from the miscarriage but doesn’t seem like it is - it’s just so hard to get my head around, especially as I haven’t had a period in between

Midwife said to date this one from the miscarriage until I have a scan so I’m only 4ish weeks

What's everyone's thoughts on 'dye stealers'. Seems like a lot of hype/necessity to get one? I'm assuming it makes no difference to the viability of a pregnancy getting one or not getting one? My latest test is pretty dark so I assume that's good enough.

@JNicko i think seeing line progression can be reassuring for the first few weeks, but after that it becomes pretty irrelevant as only scans can tell you what’s going on!

it was helpful for me after a prev ectopic as I knew the hcg was clearly rising well.

I think once you hit 4/5 weeks it’s worth stopping testing.

congratulations too xx

Thanks @Wise0wl, that does help. Unfortunately it doesn’t make the waiting much easier.

@Anxious30Something no it absolutely doesn’t. It’s the slowest 12 weeks ever! Will you book an early scan? Due to my previous losses (and some complications with spotting) my EPU booked me in. As someone else said it gives you peace of mine for a very short while.

@Wise0wl I had a private early scan last time and it was awful due to the lack of heartbeat and their next steps weren’t supportive. The whole experience of the scan felt uncomfortable. My lower half was covered with kitchen roll type and kept ripping apart, zero dignity! I would consider an early NHS scan though as it would be managed better but not private again. Will see what they offer at my appt.

So pleased you had a positive scan @30somethingttc must have been amazing to hear their heartbeats

@Anxious30Something i had a similar experience at a private scan last time so not having one this time. I had one this time at the EPU due to bleeding and I just feel much more secure & supported being there

@Anxious30Something I found out about my first MMC at a private scan (at a more health related clinic to be fair than a window to the womb type place), and it was awful. It was still awful finding out about my second MMC in the EPU but I agree, on balance preferable to the private scan place. Worth getting in touch to see what they say, anyway, maybe

Sorry I haven't caught up with the thread and just about to head to work..

I'm feeling awful today - woken up with no nausea. I felt v nauseous Monday at 6+3, mildly nauseous yesterday but tried not to worry, woken up with nothing today at 6+5. Seems like such bad timing as I feel like this would be a classic time for pregnancy to stop :(

I know there's no point worrying like this. I know I can't know anything until a scan. I don't remember with my son whether my nausea camr and went like this...

10 days until my scan

Aw @MOGMOGMOG85 - it can be very normal for symptoms to come and go, I'm finding this time I'm noticing them less and less (6th pregnancy, 1 child) and had a scan with EPU yesterday where the midwife asked about symptoms and I got nervous telling her they were very mild, almost non-existent...all was fine at the scan though thank goodness!

10 days feels like an absolute age, keep yourself busy then it'll be here before you know it!

Thank you @Traitors2024 and I'm so sorry for your 4 losses xxx

I feel like I've lost track of the thread a bit - so much going on!

Welcome @Anxious30Something @AFeastForCrows - hope you're doing ok. Those nerves in the first trimester after previous loss are just so hard to navigate. One day at a time is the only way. This thread is great for sharing the journey with others who get it. 💕

@MOGMOGMOG85 hope you're doing ok. Symptoms can definitely fluctuate loads and all being perfectly normal. It's just so triggering when you're on high alert for things going wrong. Try to keep yourself busy and distracted and hopefully (!! The only time this is ever appropriate to say!) the nausea will be back soon!!

@Confusedandtired90 sorry I missed your previous update. I've no experience I'm afraid with those numbers etc. How are you feeling? Seeing a heartbeat is great! I'm quite thankful they never gave me any measurements etc to agonise over so I've no idea what mine were in my early scans. Do you think the place would go over them with you if you ring and ask for some clarification? X

@30somethingttc so glad the scan provided some relief! Amazing to see little heartbeats too 🥰 Hope all goes well at the rescan tomorrow and they are able to get what they need. X

Gestational and yolk sacks look on track to me? Deffo within normal range for your gestation 🙏🏼

Thanks so much @SnookyPook 🩷 I have properly spiralled over it even though I said I wasn’t going to let myself do that this time round!

I haven’t seen these figures before but am going to focus on them until I next see the consultant. I wish I could ban myself from using google until this is all over 😂 I become a woman possessed pouring over scientific studies like I have any idea what they mean.

Really appreciate you taking the time to respond 🩷🩷

@30somethingttc so glad you got to see your little beans' heartbeats! And good that they're getting you back in soon to see how things are growing. Wish you lots of luck with it. 5 days to go until my 12 week scan. I might go quiet for a few days but will update with how things go on Monday.

@Confusedandtired90 aw no problem. You should have seen the way I was pouring over academic papers about femur length and head circumference and SGA babies... 🙄 Why do we do it to ourselves?!

@Confusedandtired90 congrats on your little heartbeat 💓 💕

@Hopingrae thinking of you for next week xx

I'm having no nausea today. Breasts suddenly not sore. I have a sinking feeling that this is it. Its so cruel as I just JUST said to my partner on Monday "I think this is real" :'(

Feel like a fool, I told a couple of people I shouldn't.

I can't believe what a lifetime it feels like already since my positive test on Easter Sunday, and how mentally draining this whole thing is.

Really wish it was the weekend, I just want to crawl into bed and watch trash TV for 48 hours (which is not what will happen on the weekend but that's what I'd wish) :(

Seeing friends on the weekend so will try to enjoy that

@MOGMOGMOG85 oh darling, I really hope you're wrong. It's horrible when that dread sets in. Sending you a big hug. Really hope your symptoms return soon and you feel a bit more hopeful again. X