Pregnant and homeless pls help

[Queenxxx]

Hey guys, so basically, my husband, daughter and I live with my mum currently, and I just became pregnant again with my second baby. My mum is not happy at all about this, because I had agreed with her to not get pregnant again until I move out, (because it's so hard for her right now keeping all of us in her house as well as my other siblings.) so she basically doesn't accept my pregnancy and is kicking me out. She has given me two days to leave the house. So I will be pregnant and homeless with my 19 month old and husband😭what shall I do? Me and my husband can't afford to private rent otherwise we wouldn't even be living with my mum right now. I don't work and receive universal credit and carers allowance because I am my mom's carer. My husband does work but only gets minimum wage. And my biggest problem is that my husband is from abroad. And when applying for his visa, the home office asked where he would live after arriving in the UK. We said he would live with my mum, and she was required to give written confirmation of that, which she did. She literally wrote in the letter that he can live in her house. We even had to have a property inspection to make sure there will be enough space for my husband, my baby and I as well as my mom and siblings. So basically, he wouldn't have even got the visa if my mother had not consented to him living here. And now, 6 months after he's arrived, this has happened...she wants us out of her house...will this effect his immigration status or anything? Will they blame us for this? Will they help us? Someone please help I'm so so so so upset and stressed, and I feel like such a bad mom to my babies😭

As others have said, your partner has no recourse to public funds and won’t be housed. If the terms of his visa have been broke he could well be deported.

You and your child may be housed in temporary accommodation until something permanent becomes available. Temporary is usually a B&B or a hostel place.

By all means continue with the pregnancy if that’s what you wish to do, but be prepared for the consequences.

Posts like this always get a harsh response - but I think a lot of MN posters react quite viscerally to people making decisions for non-practical reasons which will make an existing child's life significantly worse. Adults are responsible for the consequences of their own decisions; children have no agency in these situations.

OP, I'm sorry that you are in a situation with no good options. It sounds very hard. But I do feel sorrier for your existing child.

I agree that it's unreasonable for the OP's mother to be kicking her out at this stage given that there is another 7 months before the new baby arrives.

However, if she won't change her mind I wonder whether there is an option for the husband to stay at his mother in law's house while the OP tries to get emergency housing. I know that seems the wrong way round but presumably it would mean that he was complying with the terms of his visa and not having recourse to public funds.

I have no idea whether this would work or not.

Wrong, UC doesn’t necessarily cover ALL the rent

If i were you i emd my pregnancy. Its a horrible thing but its more horrible to bring a child to life without a home. You cant even provide for your family. I’m sorry but children deserve a happy childhood and a loving home. I’m so sorry for your situation.

@Queenxxx when did you tell your mum about the pregnancy? If it’s recent and you are usually close and get along (and she likes your DH) then there’s a chance she will at least give you some more time. As it stands you can’t simply move out on Monday without your husband literally being homeless and you, at best, in some type of shelter or hostel.

I suggest you spend a few days researching your options and also getting medical help to control your symptoms. Presumably it’s hard to care for your DM and your child when you’re so unwell and that’s unlikely to be making her feel any sympathy for your situation.

I do hope you find some solutions (any friends or relatives who might give you some temporary support?) However you may need to brace yourself for some very tough decisions.

Best wishes.

This.

The housing element of UC is capped. The amount differs between local authorities.

My rent is £675 a month. The maximum I can claim under the housing element is £450.

You dont get job seekers and carers allowance, your a carer that's your job you get 76 a week for 35 plus hours of care you CAN work extra but it's limited to arpund 10/12 hours a week its limited because your supposed to be caring for someone

Are you for real?

A hard spot? Her existing child is about to be made homeless and her partner likely to be deported. Does the existing child not matter?

I'm not sugar coating anything, but how many of the 'you need an abortion' brigade would take their own advice in this situation? OP is obviously in a very difficult situation right now and needs the reality spelt out but some posters are being bitchy or arsey if you prefer for the sheer hell of it.
I'm sure some get off on other peoples misery on here.

@Neverseenbefore

The uk resident most certainly can claim benefits, and Carer's is one if them, and STILL get a visa for their spouse. It's the course that can't claim any benefits. But the uk resident still can, and if they receive carers or PIP then they can also get the visa and NHS fees waived if the spouse is from a very poor country and can't afford it themselves.

No, people who have already been born mean nothing to this sort of extremist, sadly. Their priorities are entirely skewed.

That post is emotional blackmail, and no help to the OP.

If it meant my daughter was homeless and my partner deported? It wouldn’t be a question for me.

I hate it when mom gets said on here. Its mam 🤣

How much do you get for UC? Is your husband an ineligible partner on the claim? Have you tried applying to housing associations? Just thinking if his earnings are being declared as it won’t leave you with much after deductions.

Sorry should have added a photo

I do wonder if by kicking her out early her mother is encouraging her to terminate rather than waiting, ostrich style, till it’s too late.

Normally the spouse has to earn enough to support the visa holding partner. It was mentioned upthread that Op may be exempt as a carer. However I assume if she moves out and in her condition she won’t be able to provide enough care to qualify.

So the conditions of the visa will be breached if she moves out too.

I suspect Op might not be back but just in case is the older child his ad they can give special dispensation to parents of British citizens aged under 7.

Murder? Good Lord.

I don't think your mother is harsh for kicking you out, she did you a huge favour and in return you broke a very significant promise even if you didn't mean to there should have been double protection as well as a discussion about accidents and the consequences.
You should try to concentrate on getting into some work, go to the GP and ask for all and any help with the HG so you can do something and contribute to finding a room or studio to rent.
Otherwise I don't think your partner will be housed via the LA going by other more informed posters.

You aren't in her shoes.

Leave it be. The OP doesn't want to terminate - why force her into something she doesn't want to do and would clearly regret?

Yeh I had hyperemesis for the full 9 months of pregnancy and 5 months after. To afford to have our child I went back to work after 3 months and was throwing up still all the time. It can be done. I was on a drip twice with it and still worked.

Also not sure why you think you won’t be a burden on anyone by going to the council. It’s still a burden on public money and you can work with hyperemesis. I can’t even imagine having another baby without having the means to support myself and my children.

I would really think about whether you can financially support this baby.

Ah, yes, you’re right. You can apply with carer’s allowance. My bad.

Your mum just doesn’t want to lose her carer

What area are you ? You will likely have a local ‘baby bank’ where you can get everything your baby will need. You could look up your local housing allowance and you may get a flat and UC will cover the rent

I had a client a few years ago whose husband was deported in similar circumstances.

He was "no recourse to public funds" and the council wouldn't help him.