Ivf pregnancy - first trimester

[gulph]

Hi lovely's

Starting a new thread for those that have gone through ivf and are in the early stages as appreciate we have different anxieties maybe to other groups.

I'm Gayle, I had a fresh transfer on Monday the 13th March and I am currently 5 weeks 4 days pregnant. First test showed 1-2 weeks, last weeks test showed 2-3 and next test due on Wednesday (clinic have recommended a test a week until early scan) early scan is on the 14th April.

My husband and I have been trying for a baby for nearly 10 years. We fell pregnant naturally 6 years ago, however after some bleeding at 8 weeks, i went for an early scan and was only dating between 5 and 6 weeks so had to go back in a further 2 weeks to check if any development and the night before, I had a miscarriage. We haven't fallen since and following some tests, it was put down to make factor infertility and ICSI and was recommended however we could not proceed (privately) with my bmi so I started the hard work to lose 5 stone in May last year and hit my target in January 2023 to start our treatment.

I feel like there have been lots of barriers in our way so far. Nhs said no, due to my weight it was a no, due to the financials it was a no so to have anything with a yes now without having a massive battle, feels strange and like it's not quite true!

Symptoms so far - sore boobs, cramping, so hungry, feeling little bits of nausea but not sure if it is my mind or it is real

Feel free to tell me about your battle and how you are feeling

@Banbi @greentreeseverywhere

Hi and congratulations to the newbies

@gulph good luck today

@SurferAnna my clinic doesn't do bloods as standard - you can request them but they are happy to go on home pregnancy tests as they are so accurate. As others have said they cab be another source of anxiety so I've steered clear.

How is everyone doing? I've been feeling SO sick, which I know is a good sign but it's pretty debilitating. I phoned in sick yesterday and it's keeping me awake at night. I'm not being sick though so not sure a Dr would take me very seriously if I were to ask for medication. Also been having lots of pain and cramping still, so Tuesday can't come fast enough for someone to take a look at what is going on in there....

@Stopthatnoisemummy Excellent point. I'll steer clear!

@browneyedgirl626 That's really helpful, thanks. I definitely do not need another thing to obsess about! I'm in Cornwall, UK. How about everyone else?

Thank you!

My clinic just asked for me to test with a pregnancy test weekly up to my scan date and only to contact them for a blood test if there was anything inconclusive on the pregnancy tests.

I'm in West Sussex near Brighton.

Feeling so nervous about the scan today but it would be good to know that either everything is ok or the pregnancy isn't progressing despite the positive tests still.

My symptoms are really all over the place and I can't work out if the nausea is nerves or pregnancy but I do worry I don't have the overwhelming nausea that other people seem to get. I know we shouldn't compare ourselves but it just means so much 💗

Will update everyone after todays scan. Hope everyone has a good day

@browneyedgirl626 Sorry, didn't actually answer your question! I haven't actually asked about the blood test but I can see on their website they offer it, but it's quite expensive. And after spending so much on all the meds, and the IVF itself, I'll probably step back and let nature do its thing now!

@Stopthatnoisemummy Ahhh rubbish about feeling sick, but a positive pregnancy sign?? I know you've probably already said, but how many weeks are you?

Has anyone got to the stage of actually feeling pregnant? Instead of the gross bloated feeling the progesterone gives you? I feel and look at least 12 weeks 😅

@gulph good luck for your scan today 🤞❤️

@SurferAnna my clinic is in Singapore and as we moved here a couple of years ago so the protocols and drugs will be slightly different. So I did get blood tests and intralipids but I wouldn’t compare it to a U.K. clinic. Hope that helps :)

I’ve started the feel really nauseous if I go too long without eating. I met a friend for lunch today and felt rough on the train. Diet Coke settled me right now (my vow to avoid soft drinks has gone right out the window!). Trying to stay calm for my 6 week scan next week, I’m finding taking the view that there is nothing I can do to change the outcome helps. Just enjoy the feeling right now, even if it is slightly vommy!

Good luck @gulph!

Yes good luck @gulph 🍀🙏🏻

I've been getting symptoms on an off but I think steroids can mask them. Unfortunately from my mmc I have experience of having symptoms for 3 months only to find out that it had stopped growing at 6+2 , so now I don't place too much importance on them. I'm going to do another digital test maybe end of next week to see if I've moved up to 3+ weeks. Even the thought of that fills me with fear though because if the results aren't good there will be nothing I can do about it.

The waiting is so hard. I wish I could sleep for the next fortnight 😂

@graygoose how often have you been doing the intralipids, and is it for high nk cells? I had it on the day of transfer and if my scan on 1st goes well I'll have it again then. It's a huge additional expense but I'm in this deep I feel I can't really say no!

@browneyedgirl626 so my clinic basically offers them for everyone and they aren’t as expensive here compared with the overall cost of the IVF, so it was more a why not, they don’t do any harm. I haven’t been tested for NK cells but am on steroids twice a day. I had my first intralipid a few days before my FET and my second at my second positive beta test which would have been 13/14DP3DT.
I can’t honestly say if they have made the difference or not since I was never tested for NK cells, but as you say, I’m in this deep and what’s another poke with a needle at this point!

Scan went amazing! Strong little heartbeat, measuring exactly as it should and all in the right place. I feel so relieved! I started crying when we walked into the clinic and didn't stop crying until we were in the car on the way home.
Got a lovely video of the heartbeat as well.
Feel like I can actually breath for the first time in about 3 week since my first test!

Hope anyone else that had their scan today went well 🤞🏻

@gulph ohh i bet you feel such a relief!

I've got another 3 weeks to wait for the first scan, currently 5 weeks and it doesn't feel real!

I'm trying to be realistic and not too excited as first time ever tested positive!
Feels like I'm dreaming!

Amazing news @gulph are you going to get the ball rolling with the midwives now?

@SurferAnna I'm 6+2. Also have a horrible sore throat which I am not enjoying, but suspect entirely unrelated!

Congratulations @gulph - I'm so pleased for you!

Welcome to all the new joiners!

In the exact same boat with previous MMC @browneyedgirl626 My symptoms are milder this time than before and I really don't know what to do with that. I'm just trying to keep calm until my scan at 8+1 next Tuesday.

And no blood tests for me. I'm in the UK and it's not something our clinic offers. You can buy finger pin prick tests at places like medichecks (I used their AMH and it was a good service) but the range of normal is so wide it doesn't really tell you much unless you get at least two. In the end I decided just to hang in and wait.

Hello, hoping to join you ladies. Am on a very similar timeline as most of you. I had my FET March 7th (day 3 embryo) for an 7w6d today. I have a follow up scan next Friday booked with EPU as have had a few scares so have had 2 scans already. It’s been a roller coaster!

My London clinic did Beta blood tests but their sister clinic does not include it in their package. @browneyedgirl626 if you wanted it, would your clinic do a blood test for an extra cost?

Every day there is a new symptom. Today, the saliva is unreal!

@gulph that's amazing, you must feel so relieved! ✨

@graygoose ah I see, well yeah then why not! I did get tested for nk cells which came back overactive so I'm on steroids too. They are horrible, they make it so hard to sleep at night.

@Banbi it's so hard to be in this waiting bit again with a background of mmc. My symptoms have felt different this time too, but every pregnancy is different. Your wise to hang in there and wait, it makes no difference to the outcome whether you do blood tests or not. Your scan isn't far away now!

Welcome @UrbanParakeet sorry to hear about your scares, how are you feeling now? My clinic charges for every beta blood test and I just refuse to give them more money at this point! I've done one with them but not a second one. I'm just going to see what happens and see if I make it to the scan on 1st May

Thanks all!

Yes for all of us that have previously suffered a missed miscarriage, it's so blooming hard. I have suffered with my mental health previously so I found the last few weeks to stay on track and to not completely freak out! (Although I guess I did convincing myself I had suffered another mmc due to questioning my symptoms constantly)

I've now allowed myself to complete my referral to the midwife team and start relaxing about whether something is a symptom or not.

I do hope everyone else has positive scans coming up. This is all such a hard journey that every little step feels like a massive achievement 💗

Thankful to have a group of ladies all going through the same thing. I'm sure those that have natural pregnancies have worries as well but us ivf worriers jump through so many hoops to get to the same stage as those that go out and get pregnant from a quick one night fling!

Here is to all the most wanted and most thought about babies 🥰

Ladies sorry if this question is a bit tmi but what advice have you been given re: sex in the wait before the first scan? My clinics advice was that from transfer onwards I should return to normal activities which includes work, lifting, exercise, swimming, hot baths (?!) and intercourse as there's no evidence to suggest that it has an impact on the outcome.

But... I did have spotting on 7 and 8 days past the transfer (not sex related) and now I'm scared to disrupt anything down there 😬

Thanks for the reassurance @browneyedgirl626

And re sexy times, we were told we could get back to normal as soon as we liked after transfer although some stuff on the internet suggests a female orgasm isn't a good idea just during implantation. Leaning in to the tmi... we haven't gotten fully back to normal yet because the pessaries are so gross... 😣

Oh I see @Banbi well maybe this is tttmi but I haven't really been using the pessaries vaginally 😬🥴 as it's far less messy the other way!

Thanks for sharing your clinics advice though, I just feel too scared to risk it, this is going to be a looooong two weeks..!

@Banbi That's really interesting re the online blood test for AMH. I think I probably should have done that but it doesn't matter now! Originally I had a really high AMH, they thought I had a high risk of hyper stimulation but my body didn't react well to the stims, so something wasn't making sense. In hindsight I should have done another one for the third round, but clinic wouldn't play ball, even though my original one was 4 years old. It was originally taken when I was 32, and now I'm 36!

@UrbanParakeet Sorry to hear of your hard time, and good luck for your scan on Friday. Time seems to stand still, doesn't it!

@gulph I'm so happy for your healthy scan, it must be so reassuring. I feel like this whole process would test even the most healthy women in regard to their mental health. I totally totally get it.

Did anyone have to stop taking their anti anxiety medication? I'm currently on sertraline. My GP was a bit vague when I asked if I had to stop taking them. Having to stop taking anti anxiety meds, going through the most mentally challenging time, is not something I'm looking forward to. But we do what we have to do!

@browneyedgirl626 I genuinely never want to have sex again 😅 Having to have sex at a particular time, on a particular day for the last 5 years has completely turned me off. I could genuinely never have sex again and be more than fine 🤣 Not entirely sure what my partner would say about that. 🤣🤣🤣

This is sort of a niche question but.... My partner works away for months at a time, so this time round, to avoid the stress of trying to have him around at exact the right time, he froze his sperm. I've done the whole process solo, which is fine, it's the only way realistically it could be done. He's been away from day one of the stims, and came back two days after the embryo transfer. It's left me feeling incredibly detached from him. He's so excited but I can't help but feel that I get myself into a certain headspace to go to all the scans and appointments, and now he wants to come too and I really struggle to have him there. I feel like a heartless bitch, but it's like I'm having to reassure him as well as protect myself mentally at every appointment, and it's so much more draining than if I just went myself. I can feel his nervous energy!

So the question actually is (😅) is anyone going through this process semi solo? Or feeling detached from their partners? Or am I being totally crazy?!

@SurferAnna omg totally get you with the military sex for years 😂😂 we haven't had fully done the deed since we found out, again due to pessaries and my husband has been treating me like a doll! He doesn't want to hug me too hard let alone feel like he wants to poke around down there!

Also I had long discussions with my dr about my mental health meds before going through this process. I came off my tablets (with drs support) 10 years ago when we go married as I wanted to get pregnant straight away. 6 months after the wedding, I had a massive relapse (bipolar) thought everyone was trying to kill me etc and I went back on the meds. The dr has said that the meds that I'm on are fine to take whilst pregnant and breastfeeding as the risk to me outweighs any risk to my baby so I will be staying on fluoxetine and quetiapine for the duration and they will check baby when born to ensure no withdrawals etc from the meds.

@gulph ”all the most wanted and most thought about babies” - This! I shed a tear reading this as it’s so true. So happy for you that your scan went well.

@browneyedgirl626 Just back from my first midwife appointment and we asked about intercourse. They said it’s ok and we shouldn’t worry. I’m just super cautious after the 2 big bleeds I had … might wait until after my 9 week scan. I’m feeling a lot better and reassured after the scans. Was just very scary/anxiety was through the roof.

@SurferAnna Absolutely not a heartless bitch. Have you told him what you need / or not need from him at this time. I find being clear about this with my husband has helped us during 18 months of IVF. We have date nights which help us reconnect.

Some info following the midwife appointment …Because it’s an IVF baby I’m also being referred to an OBGYN consultant for extra care (or maybe it’s just one extra appointment). Everyone I’ve seen so far on the NHS has been superb and has taken extra care knowing it’s an IVF baby. They know how much this baby is wanted and how much we’ve been through already!

Hello

similar time
frame to you all - had a 5d transfer on 28th march and got positive result - had 3 hcg blood tests so far and all good numbers - but last night I started spotting which has carried on today - very light brown and not huge amounts - had cramps
and upset tummy last night - have emailed my clinic and they say not to worry but it’s impossible not too!

anyone else has spotting?

i am
5 weeks, 2 days today - scan on 28 April.

@gulph I had cycles at the agora too! Can’t live to far from you

Totally agree @SurferAnna there's nothing more unarousing than timed sex 😬. Re your partner, I do relate to this, I think that so much of this process if for us to go through rather than our partners. I didn't want my partner to come with me on transfer day, it wasn't because I didn't want to include him but it was just because I didn't want to make a big deal out of having the transfer. More a case of self protection I think. But then I did feel a bit bad when my consultant noticed that he wasn't there. He would have come along if I'd said but I chose to just meet him after and tbh I was quite grateful for the bit of time I had to myself just after the transfer and before meeting him because I was completely overcome with emotion, I think just stored up anticipation and anxiety. Are you able to talk to your partner about how you feel?

Thanks for your replies ladies on the old doing the deed. I think at this rate though we would be lucky to do anything, the tiredness has hit me like a train today. I went to the theatre with a friend and was SO close to falling asleep. Mad. I hope you're all having a good weekend

@MrsBF77 I'm in Lancing which is about 25 mins away from the Agora. Why did you change?
We have found them fine for the treatment but we were quite annoyed with them through our 'fertility mot' I felt we only got decent care once we had paid them £10k 😂

@SurferAnna my first few rounds were during covid so DH couldn't be present for any of it (except providing his sample!). Similarly my 3x rounds this year he hasn't been at the clinic at all - more for practicalities really, the clinic is near where I work rather than where I live, and had to juggle appointments around childcare. No one has ever commented at the clinic that he's not been there. He does try and remember where I am in the process, what meds I'm on etc but it's me who has it all in my head! Do what you need to do for yourself.