August Due Date Crew - Trimester 2 (Thread 7)

[AnnieApple123]

As always, newbies are most welcome.

Apologies if I’ve missed anyone. Do shout if so. Ditto if you have any changes or updates.

July
26th @MidnightSunshine12
27th
28th
29th @DesertSnow @Mulner88 @Porcupette @Loudmouth1 & @overwork
30th
31st @AnnieApple123 & @BusyBushBaby

August
1st* *@ChloeN @CityKity & @SnowL2021
2nd @sprollie11
3rd @PumpkinEverything @Chl0o@Miraclesdohappen88 & @LS88
4th @BMK @Alpacabag22
@Amme18 & @UsernameNotPresent
5th @LBF2020 @Desperatelyboredhousewife & @BoodifulGoose
6th@buttercupbee@somuchtolearnabout @Rowanandremy & @TattyTil
7th @marleyandme
8th @RGxo13
9th
10th @VickiGo& @Sjw30
11th @tax19@nadsc& @@Rose05
12th
13th @sally16 @newmummie & @@Nic2908
14th
15th @Gizzyanne
16th @Recoba
17th @Narwhal88, @jollydollyirl& @cococat88
18th @sommeliermama& @EsmeSusanOgg
19th @Firsttimemomma1 @P1pk& @allgoodthings84
20th
21st @BCxx
22nd
23rd @MinnieFirstTimeMum
24th
25th @unluckyinlife
26th @MummaYoung2023 & @Wife2b
27th
28th
29th
30th
31st

September
1st @froglou

Also @SkullCollector. Apologies, I don’t have a date for you yet.

Thank you everyone for that information. I wasn't sure what happens as it's my first and didn't want my DH missing out. I think he would be better staying at work then.

@BCxx Hi due date twin 😍

@Justdancinginthedark Definitely if it was anything like mine he would of been annoyed if he’d took time off work 🤣

It’s my first too and almost talked my partner into having a morning off to come to the 16 week appointment incase he missed hearing the heartbeat. I’m glad we changed our mind because my midwife doesn’t do it at 16 weeks!

@ChloeN @Sjw30 I will tell him to go on to work. We are having our 19 week scan (instead of 20) at the end of March. He won't be missing that one 😊

Can I refuse getting my BP checked? www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/4756125-can-i-refuse-getting-my-bp-checked?msgid=-4756125#-4756125 just posting this in here - to see if anyone can respond thanks x

@newmummie sorry you’re struggling with this. As far as I’m aware (and from watching enough maternity programmes 🙈) you can refuse to have anything done you don’t want, they will just suggest it’s for the best to have it done. The only time I think it would worry them more is if you were to show signs of there being an issue or I remember after having my baby that I had to get it checked regularly, I had a section but I think they’re the same with any birth. They come in and ask if they can do your obs each time though. Have you thought ahead to the birth? Are you thinking a home birth or something may ease your anxiety a little or what were you planning? I suffer with anxiety too so know how debilitating it is, no matter how much others may assume it’s such an irrational fear x

Anyone with negative blood, do you know how much of a knock to your bump itd need to be to cause concern? My dog trod on my belly, it hurt for probably 5 seconds and now doesn’t hurt anymore! She only weighs about 7kg ish but I’m a worrier🙈 I assume it’s okay and only big knocks?

@ChloeN i think it’s more like a decent fall and things like that but not sure. If you’ve got a number for the hospital to just phone and check with the midwives they’ll be able to tell you. Maybe just put a pad on or make sure you’re wearing light coloured underwear in case you see any sign of blood. I’m sure itl be nothing to worry about though

@BCxx My midwife never actually told me about bumps someone mentioned it on tiktok🤣 I’ll keep an eye out just in case but I don’t think it was enough of a knock to cause a bleed so guess I’m worrying for no reason, as usual🤣

@ChloeN mine haven’t really mentioned the whole blood thing at all to me this time, I’m assuming they must just think everyone is sensible and remembers and luckily I do but I’m sure some people don’t 🙈 When I was teaching I used to be really cautious about not getting bumped or not letting kids run into me but I’m sure it would be a proper impact to your bump at speed or something you’d need to actually cause any blood to come into contact with baby’s blood

I've bought some small sleepsuits and bits but has anyone made any big purchases like travel systems? Saw a bundle I like but feel I'm too early to buy such a big purchase at 16 weeks...

@jollydollyirl I think I bought my pram after the 16 week scan last time as it was between lockdowns/brexit and it said it was 3/4 months wait on it arriving. It ended up coming really quickly though 🙈 I’ve been looking for a specific double buggy on eBay for a while this time, I ended up buying it last week and ordered the carrycot new online. I have it in my house and everything but I don’t feel it’s bad luck this time when I already have one baby in the house! It will be getting put away until July or something though

I’ve seen a few deals on travel systems we like that I’ve been tempted by, but partner wants us to wait until after our scan. Also we’ve only had a look at a few so probably is a good idea we go out and see a few more

@jollydollyirl Ive ordered my pram, nursery furniture, pretty much everything🤣🤣 they’re all coming in June/July xx

@P1pk Aquanatal sounds great. I wish it was available in my area. I’ve just had a look and can’t see anything even vaguely close. Are you enjoying it? I’m hoping I can do a prenatal Pilates video everyday from now on but it’s only been 4 days so far…!

@sally16 It does seem funny doesn’t it when you feel so huge that you’re sure everyone must have noticed and that it’s become like the elephant in the room (no pun intended!)… but then you realise they haven’t at all?! My first pregnancy was like that where I didn’t tell clients until past 20 weeks. I truly didn’t think anyone would be surprised by that point but they were.

@newmummie Looks like you got some good responses to your thread. I like the suggestion of checking BP yourself at home. I actually do this anyway. Hopefully your medical team would be receptive to that.

@jollydollyirl Last time I bought a car seat pretty early on as it was in the Black Friday sale. I must have been about 15 weeks. It did feel early to make such a big purchase but I figured it was such a good deal that it could still be sold on for a good price if necessary.

@Narwhal88 @BCxx @Createcomet I had a moment this week where I was out wearing my ‘Baby on Board’ badge and for the first time I noticed people smiling at me. I suddenly felt so much sadness for all those who long for to be here too and may never make it. Conception hasn’t been completely straightforward for me either time either (although nothing compared to what many go through) and I do know what it’s like to see a pregnant woman and wonder, ‘Will it ever be my turn?’ Yet I’ve never felt like I was truly facing the end of the road like some I know are now. The one friend I mentioned has now spent 50K+ with nothing to show for it.

I do think this is partly where my anxiety comes from as I feel like having a second is almost too good to be true and surely something is going to go wrong somewhere. Interestingly weekends are by far the worst time for me. During the week I’m busy with DS and his activities and we have a pretty clear structure. At weekends I’m lucky enough to get some downtime on my own which might sound like a good thing, yet actually it’s when my anxiety goes into overdrive. Last weekend was particularly bad so I’ve been really making the effort to keep busy today and yesterday. Hope everyone else is having a good one. xx

@AnnieApple123 I feel awful for people struggling, I speak to a girl who started ttc around the same time as my mmc and she hasn’t conceived yet, I almost dread when she asks how I am because I know she probably doesn’t want to know! Everyone deserves the chance to have as many children as they’d like though so don’t feel guilty that it’s happened for you when it hasn’t to others, it sounds like you’ve not had it easy either, that’s what I have to remind myself xx

@AnnieApple123 infertility is such a horrible thing to have to go through. I can only imagine how traumatic it must be to go through the pain of not conceiving month after month after month....but also the agony of the 2 week wait every single time.

I really do feel for anyone having to go through it, and I honestly wish there was more I could do to support my SIL. I had a miscarriage just after she had had her first child, and she didn't really acknowledge it, I really don't want to be that person with her fertility struggles. I'd like to try and be a support. Especially having had 2 losses, I know that pregnancy is not to be taken for granted.

Equally though, I'm now subconciously avoiding family situations because my MIL is clearly very upset that its me that's pregnant not her daughter, and I can't deal with being the reason people are upset. So I'm kind of just removing myself from situations because I know how lucky I am to be pregnant, and the worry of losing this one/something being wrong with it is still there (quite similar to @AnnieApple123 in this sense I think) I just kind of want to keep my head down really and make sure SIL is okay. I've been really considerate (I think?!) In not pushing the pregnancy in her or my MILs face, not mentioning it deliberately, and I never talk about decorating nursery's/baby clothes/prams/any of that ever anyway because after 2 losses I just want the baby to be okay and all those things feel somehow unimportant to me if that makes sense?

But where I'm struggling is if I'm asked a question in front of in laws like about plans for this year, and then it's hard for me to answer without sort of suggesting that August is out for me because I'll be busy....and then everyone looks so sad!!! I hate being the reminder of why everyone is sad, so kind of just keeping my distance for a while really.

And I definitely find that I'm feeling anxious about choosing VBAC/ELCS and also about things I may have passed on to baby (heart problems) and so I think I just need some space from everyone for a while if that makes sense?

@AnnieApple123 you have to stop thinking about others as it's destroying your experience! Sometimes focusing on you and you alone is actually the right and best thing as we soon learn that there aren't too many going to take up that mantle if we don't do it for ourselves first and foremost. We sre supposed to be our own no1 fans and cheerleaders so enjoy things whilst acknowledging that others may not be currently able to share the joy.
You should wear your badge and news with inner or outer pride and let others have their own emotions: we're all big enough to manage our own emotions and life occurrences.
We only get 1 life and happiness has a ripple /expansive effect so be joyful.
Anxiety is pointless as you're not really fully in charge anyhow .Once you accept this and do your best and focus on the positive, the little niggle thing that wants to upset your zen will have to ind a more receptive host!
@Createcomet the baby will be perfect for you whatever they have. We get perfect babies for us irrespective of whether they are conventionally 'perfect ' or not. Mistake no1 is thinking anyone is perfect. Noone is. We learn by experiencing imperfections and accepting them. Also absolutely don't worry about in laws. Or said to MIL directly. Thst would piss me off ,I would say out straight or avoid entirely to avoid having to say it and if she remarks on absence, stsre exactly why.

So many congrats on takeover, that is amazing and huge !! Also to those who secured/found houses and mortgages. Also to those who got through the sickness and think they should be doing more; you're growing a baby!*one thing at a time is sufficient!!

Makes total sense @Createcomet . It does sound like your MIL is being quite unfair to you, whether it’s intentional or not. Are you expected to see them often? I’ve had those questions about availability in August too like everyone has forgotten and it feels awful having to actually spell it out.

@ChloeN I’ve not told my friend who miscarried this week I’m pregnant either. I know in many ways it will be harder the further along we get, yet this definitely doesn’t feel like the right time.

@BMK I guess it’s just unfortunate that I happen to know so many people with complex difficulties for whom things seem to be coming to a head around now. Inevitably it does somewhat tinge my own experience with sadness. It’s also making me incredibly thankful though for everything I have.

Anyway I don’t want to bring the mood down on here. What’s everybody up to this weekend? I was wondering whether anyone is keeping any kind of record of their pregnancy? I made a photo book for DS which I loved doing but this time round it’s feeling like quite a chore. I suppose that’s just how second pregnancies go!

@AnnieApple123 Ive bought a scrapbook, haven’t started it yet, that might be a maternity leave job 🤣

I’ve booked a holiday after lots of indecision 🙈 I’ve decided not to go when pregnant because it was going to work out that we would be able to go until some point in may with the things we have on over the next few months. So I’ve booked December when we’ll have a nearly 4 month old and a 2 year old. Might not be much of a holiday 😂 I just didn’t want to have to wait a full two years from one holiday (last summer) to the next. I actually think the 4 month old will be ‘easy’ as they just sleep and drink milk! My husband can go in and out the pool all day with our toddler!

@BCxx of you don't mind me asking where have you booked? I think we might need o wait until baby is here due to the house reno but I am a bit worried about where we could go

@jollydollyirl I have got the Moses basket and cot and that is lol so far. Waiting for our gender reveal next week so I know whether I can go Mickey or Minnie Mouse crazy 😂 I have seen a travel set I like the look of but it seems like such a lot of money (although I appreciate very necessary) so I will probably wait until after my 20 week scan next month x