First time IVF age 42

[worrymerchant]

HI - i am 42 and going thru my first IVF ICSI cycle... (already have DS,15ys, and DD 13ys from prior marriage). DH has low motility. Egg Collection produced only 7 eggs, 3 poor quality, 2 failed ICSI, i didnt fertilise so was left with just one egg to implant last thurs on day 2. AM feeling very low about it all. Any positive advice or feedback please?

Hello mistoobee and welcome,

I am very sorry to hear about your failed cycle. I know from having gone through IVF just what a traumatic experience it was, it's devestating. However you have been able to conceive naturally in the past which is a huge positive because the statistics indicate sucess is more likely in women who have had previous pregnancies.
I would contact the clinic and try and find out what they mean by an acceptable length of time for waiting, I always thought that it was 3 months but I am no expert and it depends on your condition and how you reacted to the medication.
I would have thought from my limited experience that you would be fine to start a new cycle. (Do you have any frozen embryos you don't say in your post?)I don't know if you had a consultation at the clinic after the August cycle. In my centre at Borne in Cambridge you are entitled to a free appointment up to two months after a failed cycle to review options. In the consultation they might have recomended what they would do differently in your treatment, since they should now have a better idea of how you respond to the drugs. I would also suggest that you contact other clinics to see what they would offer and what your chances of success might be. I had a very bad experience in an Assisted Conception Unit where they were determined to treat me with Clomid despite my having blocked fallopian tubes. I am very pleased that I changed centres and was offered IVF. I am now
26 weeks pregnant after 4 1/2 years of infertility and 2 ectopics, one in each tube. I have a number of friends in an infertility support group who also changed centres and had successful cycles elsewhere.
Other treatments you might want to ask about, I'm sure you are familiar with them, are ICSI (where the sperm is injected into the egg, assisted hatching (I don't know much about this at all), blastocyst culture (which I did, if you can get an embryo to blastocyst
the success rate is much higher)and (if you were interested, it's not for everyone I know) donor sperm / eggs.
I would make an appointment and run through all these, the more information you have the better and then you can make a decision.
Good luck and let us know how you get on.
XXXX NS

TNP,

I thought you had labs, I am familiar with that go on the bed and snuggle in type thing. I think they're all a bit like that. Ours ( a black lab) is a rescue dog. We found him in the park on a wet day and no-one knew anything about him, he's hardly moved from the bed since.

I am starting pregnancy yoga - ante-natal classes (or discussion after the session) on Monday evening and will let you know how it goes.
Take care X

Ah, that's where he wants to be, NS, on the bed with you all! He'll be a wonderful brother/dog for the new baby!! Enjoy your yoga class - will look forward to hearing all about it (I have two pregnancy yoga DVDs in the cupboard that I've not even played yet as I'm always too tired in the evening!) TNPx

NS Hiiii,

Thanks for the prompt response.CONRATULATIONS!!!!!!!! I wish you all the luck in the World. Unfortunately, i dont have any frozen embryos. We feel the dr was too keen to do the procedure and collect his money. Hence we were not fully briefed or given options as mentioned earlier. Anyway, thats in the past now and we are looking positively to the next try. We hve also been introduced to a dr who was recommended to us by a lady who used her and was successful. The dr really knows her stuff and seems more realistic.She is giving us no guarantess but assured us that everything possible will be done to increase our chances. I feel so comfortable with her.

Will keep u updated. Thanks alot. MTB xx

Hi Miistoobe - welcome to Mumsnet. You'll find loads of advice and support here with the whole conception/IVF/"older mother" topics.

I agree with NS that I would have thought, having your last attempt last August, your body would have recuperated sufficiently by now to try again, but you'll have to go on the advice of your clinic. Are you doing all the usual dietary checks etc? You might also be advised to go straight back for the full IVF/ICSI (or whatever is appopriate for your situation) rather than a 'wait and see for a bit longer' approach, because, to be quite honest, it sounds like you've waited enough ifswim. So, make that appointment at the clinic of your choice and check out your options and see what sort of waiting lists they have (most will treat you pretty soon, but bear in mind that that can usually mean actually starting treatment a couple of months from now by the time all your pre-checks are done etc).

I am 21 weeks pregnant, following a FET cycle. Before that, I had a 'fresh' IVF cycle, resulting also in a positive pregnancy. (I'm now 41, btw.)
Good luck and let us know how you get on!

Hi TNP,

Just bumping this up as it was getting a long way down the list.
I went to see my little niece in her school assembly yesterday morning, she's year 2. I still find being around crowds of young children quite strange, almost a new world. Unfortunately, the rush in the morning left me feeling quite faint. I think my blood sugar was low. After a couple of waffles with honey and camomile tea I felt much better.
Hope your okay and the headaches are improving. Will post again on Monday.

Hi NS and TP,

This website is great! TP thanks for the advice and congratulations on the pregnancy. Im still trying to get used to the abbrvs. What is FET? At the moment we'e trying to get a report from the previous dr but he seems a bit reluctant. We understand the report will make things a bit easier for our present dr. I mean some questions we may not be able to answer.

My DH and i are hoping to start accupunture. We heard its quite good. Just trying to improve our chances. The new dr put me on pregnacare and aspirin on our second visit in December. Still taking them. Hoping to go back to her first week in March. If you dont mind me asking, how old are you both? How many tries did you have respectively before success? I know we are all different but just curious. Howz WM? Regards MTB xxxx

Dear Mistoobee,

I am a little younger than you, 37 years. My infertility went on for 4 years. At first it was unexplained infertility, although I insticively felt there was a problem. I had never taken the pill and I suffered enormously with painful periods, on two occasions I bled continuously for 2-3 months with no explanation. Then I had the two ectopic pregnacies and the doctors finally realised I had blocked fallopian tubes, probably as a result of microscopic damage which failed to show up on a laparoscopy.
After years of bad luck (and poor treatment) I finally got referred to Borne Hall IVF Clinic in Cambridge. I was extremely lucky that my first IVF treatment cycle was sucessful. I produced 16 eggs, 12 fertilised and 6 went to blastocyst. Two were transfered (ET means embryo transfer and FET is frozen embryo transfer.) I have 4 frozen blasts although only 2 are high quality. I was keen to do a blastocyst cycle because the chances of success are much higher (ranging from I think 40% - upwards of 70% in different centres. In mine it was 54% for my age group, all centres will show their success rates on web page / if you ask for them.) The difficulty is that not everyone reaches blastocyst stage and this was explained to me before I started.
I know how difficult it is to get a report from a previous doctor. You have a right to it though and they should provide it. It alwasy amazes and shocks me as to how difficult it can be to get information. I have struggled on numerous occasions to get reports and am struggling at the moment to get my notes out of Ireland. Although I live in Ireland I have come back to Cambridge to have the baby because my family live here and can help out, plus the services are better suited to me, being a highly anxious person.
Anyway best of luck and let us know how you do!

Hello everyone! My it's been busy during my absence! Great to have a new friend on our thread - welcome MTB.

WEll, sorry I disappeared for a while - DH took me away for a few days to the Lakes to try and get over things and sort through our emotions etc as we hadnt really talked things through much before. HE had avoided talking ot me about it as he thought it would upset me. I then thought he didnt care. HE then thoughtI didnt realise he had feeligns too, but how was I supposed to when he didnt talk to me in the forst place?? AARRGGHH!! I dont understand male logic soemtimes!!

Anyway, it was a pretty emotional rollercoaster in the lakes, with good days and very bad ones, but I think we have come out of it pretty ok.

The day before we went away we had the consultant follow up appt. What a disaster!! DH walked out!!! Have decided that although this clinic is cutting edge in terms of its expertise and success rates, it is severely lacking in pastoral care whihc is an important element in my mind in the whole process.

I dont know yet when we will try again - but in the meanwhile we are still carrying on wiht our acupuncture and have also started reflexology for hte stress which has already been so very helpful

I think my hormones have been unbalanced by this cycle. I dont think I ovulated this month. Hopefully the reflex and acup will help restore the balance.

Sorry, this post has been all about meee,but I do want to know all about what you are all up to.

NS and TNP - thank you for thinking of me, and for all your encouragement and advice so far. You have really helped me more than you can know.

MTB - I am also 42, and DH very LSC, also poor motility. I would agree wiht others that you should be guided by clinic as to what is a suitable gap, but I would have thought it would be fine to start again soon. Can I be nosey and ask you about your previous cycle? How many eggs at EC and how many fertilised etc? Are you having any alternative therapy like acup? My DH swears his testosterone has shot up from the acup- and if his macho behaviour over the last week or so is anything ot go by I would tend to agree . anyway, DD not well again so must go. Look forward to chatting during the week. xxx

Hi there all,

WM it's great to hear from you and I have been thinking of you. First of all I hope you are feeling better and have had some chance to gather your thoughts. I also look forward to chatting this week.
It sounds as though your DH is like my partner. My partner hasn't actually walked out of a consultation yet but he's come very close to it. In some of our more recent appointments I have seen the steam coming off him. We've been in situations where we have been asked to repeat our story over and over again despite half of it having happened in the same hospital. Nothing is kept on the computer in our part of Ireland. Also we have been given the wrong treatment / poor treatment in numerous places. For my first ectopic pregnancy I was made to wait for the entire day in the labour admissions ward before they took me in! He has rightly been extremely angry on numerous occasions.
My partner is also someone who finds it hard / doesn't want talk about issues. For 4 years he couldn't understand why I had this compelling urge to either avoid pregnant women or burst into tears if I saw one (I thought the world totally unfair, particulalry when it came to unplanned pregnancy) and he would swing between being sympathetic and fits of annoyance because he didn't know how to handle my emotions. Underneath it all he was very sympathetic and I love him loads for it but it wasn't an easy ride and we had a number of discussions. Like your DH he could also go silent at times. He is coming to join me in a fortnight which is great. I'll be reunited with him and the dogs at last Your right, the male psyche handles things in a different way.
I also agree with you WM about the pastrol care in IVF clinics. I feel they are medically run and there is huge lack of understanding about the impact of all that medication on mood (regardless of outcome) and stress. I was extremely lucky to develop an excellent rapour with the clinic counsellor. She was there every step of the way for me and even came down to the ward at egg collection because I was terrified of anaesthetics. If you change clinics you might want to ask about the level of counselling offered or even meet the counsellor beforehand to get to know them. I can't stress how much it helped me and I am still in touch with her now.
Well I have pregnancy yoga this evenning for the first time at 6.00am which will be interesting as I have never done yoga before.
After the class there is a chance to ask questions about anythign ranging from giving birth to relaxation. I am starting to be a wee bit more anxious about the big day as it gets nearer.
I am also begining for the first time in months to think about writing. I am going to try and join a local writing class and get moving with my two novels. I also have hundreds of ideas floating through my mind, one of which is to write about our experiences of infertility in Ireland and England.
Take care veryone and speak soon. Mistoobee I hope you get on all right at your next consultation.

Hi there everyone. WM it's lovely to hear from you and, reading between the lines, you seem so much more settled in yourself. That break away with DH must have been very beneficial and so good to have given both of you a chance to talk it all over - certainly not easy when you're also running a family at the same time and trying to "get on with life", so I'm really glad you were able to get away.

Well, of course you don't have to make any decisions yet about trying again, or not, and it's best you don't rush anything. Yes, that rapport is all important, because if you don't feel fully confident in them, it will affect your mental attitude. I think the idea of the acupuncture and reflexology for you both is great, to keep your general health up to scratch and help with the stress. I had loads of acupuncture before finally going for the IVF route, hoping that acupuncture would help me conceive before medical intervention. Alas, it did not, but it helped me with so many other things and I'm certainly glad I had so many treatments.

NS I bet you are counting the days until DP and dogs are with you! (Fully sympathise with your light-headed spell the other day, btw - I get them all the time and it's not pleasant. Blood sugar levels and carrying all that excess blood from the pregnancy is to blame. Keep munching!). Hope you enjoy your yoga - you should come home all chilled out this evening! Now, are you doing your pelvic floor exercises ....???

MTB - I'm 41. I had my first 'fresh' IVF cycle at 37, which was successful and resulted in DS2. From that cycle, we had 8 top grade embryos, using two for the transfer and storing the remaining 6. Then, last October I had a FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer, as NS says), using two of the remaining embryos, and resulting in this pregnancy, now 21 weeks! We had gone through almost 10 years of unexplained infertility, but in the meantime, had adopted our beautiful DS1 as a small baby. I was so lucky to have had the "baby experience" with him and to finally have everything that I wanted, that, when we did eventually give IVF a go, I was positive about going for it, as I felt I "didn't have anything to lose", if that makes sense. I already had everything in DS1 and if the IVF worked, that would be a wonderful extra bonus. And it worked! And then worked again last year! I feel so incredibly fortunate to have the family that I have, and that each one of our children has been so much longed for and fought for. Good luck with trying to get a report from your clinic - are you trying to get a written one? If they're kicking back from that (which they shouldn't), you are at least entitled to a verbal follow-up, as WM has had.

Bye for now everyone, TNPx

Hi all.

Welcome back WM. Glad to know things are fine with you. Its so nice to know that im not the only one who has issues with her man at such emotional times. We all know how drinking and smoking can slow down sperm action. Its mobility, quantity and quality esp with men known to have unexplained sperm issues.

Anyway, my DH knows how hard i am working on getting myself ready for the procedure, and i expect much more from him. Anyhew, he comes home last week only for me to smell cig on his fingers. Also ever so often he has red wine. I would have thot that for the period. This happened to be on Valentines day. Well that nite which was meant to be a 'nite of passion'turned out to be a nite of disaster cos i refused him touch me since when I asked and he denied having a cig.(He actually stopped smoking years ago but stil has the odd one or two).

We both got so angry and stopped communicating for a couple of days. I really missed him though as he's my best friend. He thrives on communication and can't handle when we don't talk. Anway, we ended up having a long coversation away from home that w/end. He could'nt understand why i was so frantic at him. He said the way i responded, one would have thought i caught him naked with another woman.LOL

I have the ability to handle intense pain (Had my 3 DC all normal without any pain killers but for ice cubes which i chewed on) hence during IVF1, i went thru the procedure keeping the all the pain emotions and discomfort to myself. I dont think he realised what i was going thru as i hardly winged to him. I had to explain to him how hard things were for me during that period and by him going on smoking and drinking is so selfish and unfair. I have to take all the injections , medications and go through the ET, then his sperm is taken. So basically i would have done all that only for him to produce sperm with no head or tail if i could put it that way.

I'm sorry if i'm talking too much about myself. It was a frustrating time for me. Thank God its all over now and we are looking forward to IVF2. We hope to start the acupunture pretty soon. Hope to post b4 the week ends. All the best NS,TP and WM.

MTB XXX

Hi all again,

To answer your question WM. According to the dr,8 eggs were retrieved and three of them got fertilized. He put all three during the ET. I still feel he could have done much more especially after meeting our present dr. He told us we had a 60% chance while our present dr said we have a 40% chance of success. That sounds more realistic considering our age. Anyway, right now i'm doing away with the statistics and hoping for the best with positive thoughts!

Bye all xxx MTB

Dear all,

It's great to hear from you. I am stiff from the yoga last night. I can see the benefit of it...but OH MY GOD it's hard work.

MB: There are elements of my partner in your story as well. We had a number of talks about smoking and drinking. I have to say that (apart from one or two incidents) he cut down dramatically. It is a worry and I had exactly the same conversation with him that you did, particulalry after one party when he came home sick with drink (about a month before ET).
I was reminded by the counsellor that there is no definate clear cut correlation between smoking and drinking, many people who do smoke and drink heavily have normal SC and vice versa. Also she reminded me that it was important for me to try and remain calm (something I find difficult) because I could cause myself unnesessary stress worrying which had the potential to do damage. My partner was an extreamely heavy smoker in the past (at one point he told me he smoked upwards of 100 per day, before I knew him). Although he more or less abstained during our preparation period, he too smoked the odd few and drank the odd few, I am certain of it and it didn't affect us at all.
I wish you all the luck in the world for your consultation!

WM: I am glad you are feeling better. I am sure the acupuncture will help. I didn't try it myself because of cost. However, during my preparation period I got myself as fit as possible. I walked about 4 miles per day and swam 30 lenghts of a 25 meter pool 3 times per week. I was at peak fitness at the time of conception for all 3 of my pregnancies and I am convinced good health and physical fitness help. I'm not in quite the same shape now, not if last night was anything to go by.

TNP: What are pelvic floor exercises? I've heard of them but not quite sure what they are. Having just written all that about exercise I feel a bit guilty because I've done nothing like it the last while. I AM SO TIRED! And I don't have any excuse because I don't have to run about after small children or labradors. Pregnancy is tiring. Like you though, I feel blessed to be pregnant with this child and I can't wait to meet him or her. I literally count the days. I am so excited...it is now excitment more than anxiety that is keeping me awake at night.
When is your next midwife appointment? I have 28 week bloods this week (am keen for them to test for anaemia because I am so tired) and I will see the midwife at the end of next week for my 28 week check. I think we might be due to go at the same time. Hope the low blood sugar / headaches are improving.

Lots of love to you all. NS XXXX

Hi NS - it sounds like that yoga is really working those muscles! Keep up the good work. Are you going to try and continue the exercises at home, in between classes? The thing with yoga, I believe, is to make sure it's regular and frequent - so you're better doing say just 5 mins a day rather than only one major session a week, although I should take my own advice and get doing some of it myself!

Pelvic floor exercises are really important to prevent incontinence/weakened bladder after the birth and later on in life. Basically, if you stop your stream of wee mid flow, then you're using those muscles, and you're supposed to do loads of 'squeezes' every day to build up control. Your midwife and antenatal classes will cover all that with you.

I'm not due to see the midwife until 10th March - it just seems so long between appointments at this stage but I think aftr that, the schedule will be more like yours is now, every three weeks or so I believe. The baby is moving and tapping about so much at the moment and kept me awake last night quite a bit. I've not had any bad headaches recently, though, thank goodness, but am finding I'm going through a patch of breathlessness which is quite unsettling. It's a common pregnancy thing - do you get it at all? It feels to me like how I might imagine being up Everest to be (or in a decompressed aeroplane) where you just don't feel you have enough oxygen. I remember this from last time - it comes and goes in phases because the heart becomes used to it and deals with it, before it all kicks off again. Then, in late pregnancy, I remember not being able to breathe because the baby was literally shoving the air out of my lungs ... so I've got that to look forward to later on as well. Hope you don't get it (I'm an asthmatic as well so it probably makes it all the worse for me). Yes, do get the midwife/doctor to test for anaemia - that's a really common thing too. And indulge yourself in some dark chocolate if you like it (which I do!) - it's got lots of iron in it and might help if you are anaemic - so you're allowed - it's medicinal!

How is your writing going? What sort of stories do you write?

MTB - you had THREE embryos transferred? Are you being treated in the UK?

Bye for now, and take care, TNPx

Dear TNP,

I have indulged in the dark cocolate. Not for medicinal reasons but I'm glad I have an excuse!
I am less indulgent in the exercises. I might try them tomorrow morning. Yesterday I came back exhuasted and sick from the class. It was great though to meet other women. Most of them are due around the same time as me which was great. I don't know anyone in Cambridge having left when I was 18.
Only two weeks until my DP and DD (X2) Dear Dogs and DC (Dear Cat) we'll have to think of a notation arrive from Ireland.
I tried to join a writing class but unfortunately it meets in the evening and I am just too tired right now. I'm being kept awake by kicks, restless legs, breathlessness (yes I have it all the time) and occasional ectopic heart beats which I have been told are benign and I have suffered from since I was small. Also, I am just pregnancy tired.
In answer to your question I have written two teenage novels (both around 80,000 words) a series of short stories (most involving teens)and three radio plays, none of these have been published, although I have tried.
I always felt my writing and infertility were similar and traveling along together.
I am keen to write about my experiences of infertility because I think it is still largely not discussed in Ireland. The services are just dreadful as well. Although I was seen frequently enough, all I got was 5 minutes with a consultant and a "yes your fine" With my level of anxiety and the trauma I had gone through with the ectopic pregncies I needed a sympathetic midwife who was prepared to spend more time. It might be different in other parts of Ireland but where we came from services were desperate.
I have started a synopsis to send out but I don't have the stamina at the moment. I guess it will come back later.
I understand your frustration about the gap between midwife appointments. It does seem to traul. I am also sorry to hear about the asthma. My midwife told me that any complaint a person has is exacebated by pregnancy. Do you have to take medication while you are pregnant? I like your description of decompressed aeroplane. I was certainly a lot more breathless than anyone else in the class.
Got to go now! Bye!
NS X

Hi NS and TP,

Its so nice to read your discussions on yoga and chocolate.I hope to bear it in mind.

NS: I do understand alcohol and smoking may not have any direct effect on sperm, but i feel in a number of men, it would have an unexplained effect. The gap betwn my 1st and 2nd is 4 yrs and thats bcos it just didnt happen. We tried for 2 yrs b4 we bcame lucky.

My DH was b4 then, a very heavy smoker and drank on numerous occasions. But when he cut them out, bingo.... I got pregnant! With DC3 it just happened and at that time, he rarely smoke or drank. Now that he is older, i feel he should try as much as possible to refrain from indulging in anything that can affect his sperm.

Last nite when he thought i was asleep, i got up to ease myself only to find out he had helped himself to shot of brandy. To be honest from now on, i'm just going to ignore all that he does but should'nt be doing. Yday he said he wants us to do some acupunture sessions b4 our next consultation. I'm trying not to be too hard on him as i know he is highly charged up at work. I guess he knows he is stressed too. Maybe acupunture will help relieve him of it.

He used to be actively involved in kungfu and that was his stress buster but has been unable to attend class for over 4 months due to work commitments.

TP: I am beng treated in Bahrain where i reside. I presume things are done differently in the UK as far as expertise, knowledge and skill are concerned plus there is a vast amount of resources readily available.

Here, i feel some of the doctors are still learning needless to say, i'm sure there are some very highly skilled ones around here somewhere. Well my dr now is excellent. Also her being a woman really helps. She worked for many years in a clinic called the Lister clinic in the UK. Stumbled across her through word-of-mouth. A lady who used her and was successful told us about her. She had gone through 7 unsuccessfull pregnancies b4 finally getting pregnant at 43 via ivf with the 8th.

Yes my previous dr put all 3 during the ET. Does that seem unusual??????? To be honest we went in without adequate knowledge, neither are there any support groups or resources open/ readily available here. As NS mentioned, like in Ireland, such issues are hush hush here too. No one likes to talk openly about it so i've resorted to other means hence MUMSNET. What more could i ask for???

WM: How are you? Trust you are well.

Funny enough, i've gotten more info here than i did from the 1st dr.You see here we hear about some of ivf drs thru their adds in the newspapers and magazines. Now thinking back, my dr now, never advertises which explains it all. Girls, i could talk on forever. I won't be posting again until nxt week. W/ends here are fr/sat so will be occupied with family etc.

TP,NB and WM, Hve a wonderful weekend and Take things easy.

Hi MTB - I did wonder about the three embryos as it is illegal in this country, so thought you were in a different part of the world. It's not practise here due to the risks of multiple pregnancies and all the associated dangers of that, especialy with 'older' mothers. I know the practises vary a lot in other countries. It sounds like you've really been through the mill with your treatment so I hope things go smoothly for you now with your new doctor. I am sure it will help you confidence that she is a woman - at least, it would for me. My consultant was a woman (for both treatments at the same clinic) and she was fabulous, and really helped me to keep positive.

Hi NS - wow, what a list of creative writing! Have you joined the thread somewhere on here for people with material waiting to be published? It's in the "Other subjects" section, I think ... Sounds really great, I wish you all the success with it.

Must go now as it's bath time for my little ones, but will chat later. Bye for now, TNPx

Dear all,

Hi hope you're all doing okay. Mistoobee, it is really interesting to share experiences with someone from another country. Things are really different here. I hope I didn't offend you with the story about alochol / smoking and IVF. I just know that I had similar worries and I wanted to share with you the information that I was given by my clinic. I fully understand that it is different for everyone and I also apreciate the frustration of taking all that medication when one's partner sucumbs. On one or two nights I was so angry I didn't want to take my downregulation meds at all, although I forced myself to. (I was downregulating for 2 months because I failed to respond to the sniffer. That meant I was doing injections for about 3 months!) I will be thinking of you. Let us know how your consultation goes. WM I am also thinking about you and how things are going. You mentioned, I think that your DD was ill again. I hope she has made a quick recovery.
Well I went for my 28 week bloods today. Normally, it's impossible to get blood out of me but the practice nurse was very proficiant and used a butterfly. I remember how it took a GP 2 hours to get blood out of me on one occasion. Now I have to book my midwife appointment for next week. TNP do you have the lucosade test for diabities where you are. It's disgusting!
Thanks for the advice about writing TNP, it would be great to have an online club of some sort because I am really too tired right now for joining a new club and meeting people. However, I would like to do something with those books and stories. Throughout my years of infertility writing kept me going and was my world. If I couldn't have real children, I invented them. I still like to meet up with all my ficticious children from time to time. None of them were screaming babies though. My main characters tend to be adolescents for some reason. Do you ever write or paint? I don't expect you've much time with those two young children to look after. You sound like you've lots of responsibility.
Love to you all,
NS XXXXX

Dear all,

Just bumping this up. Hope you are all well.

NS XXXX

Hi All - hope everyone is okay. Just a quick bump before I rush off out on the school run. Really interested to hear of your writing topics NS - I just wish I could do something like that, but I'm afraid my brain is well and truly addled after children! If I did have the energy (which I don't) then I certainly don't have any ideas, but I do think it would be very rewarding and therapeutic. Perhaps when the children have left home ...?! If I were you, I'd try and tie up any loose ends before your baby comes, as certainly for the first few months at least, all your time and energies will be taken with focusing on your baby, day and night. It comes as a complete shock, I warn you! So, if you want to have one last blast at approaching publishers or formulating any more ideas at this stage, I'd do it now, and then expect to have a bit of a 'break' from it for a while!

Had a horrid Mother's Day on Sunday - not through any fault of my boys or DH, but because we had a burst tyre on the motorway on the way out to lunch, and had to sit in the car with the boys as there was nowhere really safe to decamp to whilst DH changed the wheel - it was a case of staying in the car or risk boys running into motorway - not much of a choice and I was quite petrified. Meal was expensive and slow, slow, slow, we walked out after waiting 40+ minutes for pudding, boys getting more and more frantic. What a disaster! Woke up that night with anxiety attacks about the motorway. I did get some nice scent though, so keep spritzing myself with that to feel better!

OK, time is ticking so must get them out the door, bye for now and take care all, TNPx

Hi Everyone, just to say i am sorry for not posting last week, butI had some family problems which brought be really down. Can't seem ot keep my head abouve water these days. Also lots of problems with our dog, who has become really possessive of DH and has taken a real dislike to me as a rival!! Not sure how to deal with that one!!! A lot of food agression too.

Anyway, the reflexology (did I tell you I was doing that now?) is going really well, in fact the girl who does it is really good to talk to and she has got me a "prepare to conceive" self hypnosis CD - I was really sceptical but it is incredibly effective at gettign me to totally switch off and relax. There are also others in the range for the IVF process and for pregnancy, so hopefully I will progress to those soon!!

I hope you are all well, I have enjoyed reading about the chocolate and yoga! I have decided to lose a bit of weight and get back to being fit - when I started the IVF process I was told to put on 1\2 stone and stop exercising - which I duly did - obviously didnt get a result from that other than clothes are now tight and I dont like the way I look!! I think if you are unhappy it really impacts negatively on the process. TNP - got myself an orange and pink scarf from fairtrade !!
MTB - different countries have different policies on the number of eggs that can be implanted - in te US they step up with ageto a max of 5 at 42 years ols and above I think. Here in the UK the HFEA regulations state that you can only have 2 eggs transferred back UNLESS you are over 40 in whihc case you can have a maximum of 3.

ANyway, hope you are all doing well - am seeing brilliant acupuncturist this pm - she has treated 60 infertile couples and had 48 successes!! She uses chinese herbs as well, whihc I think will make a difference as apparently she believes from looking at my temp charts) that I have low progesterone and told me that there was no way the IVF could ever have worked under those circumstances. Hospitals dont check for that, only your FSH, but its no good an embryo implanting if there is not enough progesterone to support it.

Look forward to hearing everyone's news - it is snowing outside here!
Lots of love
WM xxx

Hi Everyone, just to say i am sorry for not posting last week, butI had some family problems which brought be really down. Can't seem ot keep my head abouve water these days. Also lots of problems with our dog, who has become really possessive of DH and has taken a real dislike to me as a rival!! Not sure how to deal with that one!!! A lot of food agression too.

Anyway, the reflexology (did I tell you I was doing that now?) is going really well, in fact the girl who does it is really good to talk to and she has got me a "prepare to conceive" self hypnosis CD - I was really sceptical but it is incredibly effective at gettign me to totally switch off and relax. There are also others in the range for the IVF process and for pregnancy, so hopefully I will progress to those soon!!

I hope you are all well, I have enjoyed reading about the chocolate and yoga! I have decided to lose a bit of weight and get back to being fit - when I started the IVF process I was told to put on 1\2 stone and stop exercising - which I duly did - obviously didnt get a result from that other than clothes are now tight and I dont like the way I look!! I think if you are unhappy it really impacts negatively on the process. TNP - got myself an orange and pink scarf from fairtrade !!
MTB - different countries have different policies on the number of eggs that can be implanted - in te US they step up with ageto a max of 5 at 42 years ols and above I think. Here in the UK the HFEA regulations state that you can only have 2 eggs transferred back UNLESS you are over 40 in whihc case you can have a maximum of 3.

ANyway, hope you are all doing well - am seeing brilliant acupuncturist this pm - she has treated 60 infertile couples and had 48 successes!! She uses chinese herbs as well, whihc I think will make a difference as apparently she believes from looking at my temp charts) that I have low progesterone and told me that there was no way the IVF could ever have worked under those circumstances. Hospitals dont check for that, only your FSH, but its no good an embryo implanting if there is not enough progesterone to support it.

Look forward to hearing everyone's news - it is snowing outside here!
Lots of love
WM xxx

Hi Everyone, just to say i am sorry for not posting last week, butI had some family problems which brought be really down. Can't seem ot keep my head abouve water these days. Also lots of problems with our dog, who has become really possessive of DH and has taken a real dislike to me as a rival!! Not sure how to deal with that one!!! A lot of food agression too.

Anyway, the reflexology (did I tell you I was doing that now?) is going really well, in fact the girl who does it is really good to talk to and she has got me a "prepare to conceive" self hypnosis CD - I was really sceptical but it is incredibly effective at gettign me to totally switch off and relax. There are also others in the range for the IVF process and for pregnancy, so hopefully I will progress to those soon!!

I hope you are all well, I have enjoyed reading about the chocolate and yoga! I have decided to lose a bit of weight and get back to being fit - when I started the IVF process I was told to put on 1\2 stone and stop exercising - which I duly did - obviously didnt get a result from that other than clothes are now tight and I dont like the way I look!! I think if you are unhappy it really impacts negatively on the process. TNP - got myself an orange and pink scarf from fairtrade !!
MTB - different countries have different policies on the number of eggs that can be implanted - in te US they step up with ageto a max of 5 at 42 years ols and above I think. Here in the UK the HFEA regulations state that you can only have 2 eggs transferred back UNLESS you are over 40 in whihc case you can have a maximum of 3.

ANyway, hope you are all doing well - am seeing brilliant acupuncturist this pm - she has treated 60 infertile couples and had 48 successes!! She uses chinese herbs as well, whihc I think will make a difference as apparently she believes from looking at my temp charts) that I have low progesterone and told me that there was no way the IVF could ever have worked under those circumstances. Hospitals dont check for that, only your FSH, but its no good an embryo implanting if there is not enough progesterone to support it.

Look forward to hearing everyone's news - it is snowing outside here!
Lots of love
WM xxx

Hi sorry about that ... dont know what happened, computer obvioulsy triger happy this mornign!! x